"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion." - Unknown
My dog died in June, while I was in London. I know exactly how you feel right now. I have a lot of sadness and guilt over the fact that I wasn't there, didn't get to say goodbye, etc. It's been really hard. I'm sorry you are going through the same.