I didn't read all 10 pages but have the racist nature of Unions been mentioned?
Yes but @javalover has handily ignored that and decided to take umbrage at the words “the whitest thing ever”.
Whatever. Fuck that. If you think I’m not telling my kids that college and grad school is in their future you’ve got another thing coming. Mediocrity doesn’t work out well for non-white people.
@natariru and I were just talking about you when we had dinner this week*. The epic shade you throw at folks was admired, LOL!!!
This rubbed me the wrong way because not everyone looks at caring for their parents as a burden. I know I will have to help support my mother in her retirement. And maybe it's our family's culture and the fact that we have a great relationship and we are ok financially...I just can't even imagine how hurt my mother would be if she thought she was such a burden to us.
I spent most of this year doing nearly all of the heavy work of caretaking for my mother in law until her death in September and it nearly broke me. I didn't mind helping her with expenses because her tiny pension and social security wouldn't have covered all her bills but the physical and mental toll of handling all her medical needs, doing the legal, financial, and physical work of moving her into nursing home, and being her responsible adult for everything because she was too ill and disoriented most of the time was a huge burden. I did not like her all that much but I did all those things because that's what needed to be done. My greatest fear is my step mother in law going before my father in law because he'll have to move in with us; his health is too poor to live on his own, not bad enough for a nursing home, and there's no money for assisted living.
I thought this thread was specifically speaking to the financial burden so that is what I responded to in the original post- I personally, for a variety of reasons, do not look at helping my mother financially as a burden.
Maybe I worded my OP ambiguously because every one who has responded has talked also of the physical/emotional burden. I agree that is HUGE. In no way was I saying that doesn't exist or that I won't feel that. And while some of the emotional/physical burden can be alleviated by having more money saved (hiring caregivers for example), there are things that can't be lessened no matter the financial situation- as you said things like the legal, financial, and physical part of moving a parent to a nursing home. A majority of children will face that with their parents no matter their retirement account balance.
What ivies have gotten rid of need blind?!?! Brown announced today they are eliminating loans from financial aid packages awarded by the university. This initiative has a $120 million price tag (funded by donors).
True, but I think Dartmouth is talking about it. Some good, non-ivy schools have either gone to need-aware or do a combination. Tufts, Wesleyan, Grinnell, and a few others no longer do need-blind admissions, and Smith looks at financial need when it determines wait-list admissions now. And the only schools that guarantee grants to ALL students who need financial aid are MIT, Harvard, Yale, Princeton and Amherst, I think. And if your kid can get into any of those, she can probably get a full ride at other schools, too.
Some schools used to be need blind for all students, but now assess need for international students, which makes sense, since they normally have fewer financial aid avenues than domestic students.
You left out Bowdoin which also guarantees grants to the full need (no loan). And now Brown. Many internationals are full pay which is unsurprising.
This thread got super weird while I went to lunch.
If I don't have credit card debt or a mortgage and only have a very modest payment on a car that will be paid off in 4 months, is it OK that I spent $2.50 on a chocolate chip muffin?
I don't like chocolate chips in soft breads and cakes, so I disapprove. I feel like you need something a little more substantial and chewy, like a cookie, to support the chocolate chip and optimize the texture.
I'll bake you my pumpkin chocolate chip bread and see if I can't change your mind.
(still reading through the thread and marveling at the latest example of know-it-all-ism punctuated by allcaps and asterisks)