Hello. My 86 y.o. mother in law (mnl) said something awful about our 8 yr old granddaughter. It was something that caused me to unfriend her on fb and seriously consider not going to her home for holidays. It's like she has no filters anymore. She says exactly what she feels/thinks. In this case she didn't like what my gd wore for school pictures (a sundress). She said it wasn't a dress, it was a bra because it has adjustable straps. She made negative comments about her long hair being straightened (which her mother did for 'picture day'). My mnl said she wanted a picture she could "hang on the wall, not one that looks like 'some porn star'."
She said this to my husband, her son. He was so upset that he left her house. I haven't been able to talk to my mnl since my husband told me, which was several days ago.
Any suggestions on what I should say to my mnl? I need to let her know how I feel and clear the air. I just cannot believe that she would say such things about my gd. She's 8 y.o. plays with dolls, makes slime, doesn't even know what sex is.
Often as dementia progresses, filters come off. Does MIL have a dementia diagnosis?
Ditto. This is more than likely the beginning of what will be many unpleasant, hurtful comments. You have to tell yourself that it's the disease speaking, not your mother in law. It's very hard, but try not to take what she says seriously. In my mother's final stage of Alzheimer's she used to tell all her kids that she never loved us, which was patently not true.
Often as dementia progresses, filters come off. Does MIL have a dementia diagnosis?
I wonder if this is what is going on with my FIL. over the holiday he has made derrogatory and unsupportive comments about 2 of my daughters career choices, picked on me all day about my cat and dug in on an issue with my son that was frankly none of his business