Post by cattledogkisses on Dec 1, 2018 11:25:15 GMT -5
My mom called me this morning to tell me that my grandmother has gone into hospice. She’s in the end stages of dementia, and has lost the ability to eat. Dementia is such a horrific disease that I think it will be a relief in many ways when she does pass.
Grieving someone with dementia is a weird process. Her physical body is still here, but in every way that matters she’s been gone for a long time. Her illness has meant that we haven’t been able to have a close relationship for a long time, and I feel a little guilty for not feeling more sad about the fact that she will likely pass soon.
I totally get where you're coming from. Dementia and Alzheimer's are horrific on so many levels, for the person and for the family. My dad and his mother both suffered from it and yes, it was a relief when they were finally able to let go physically, and so we were finally able to finish mourning. It's absolutely normal for you to feel what you're feeling. I am likely to also develop it (I have certain markers and genetic predisposition) and I hope and pray that I don't suffer or make my family suffer needlessly. I am fortunate to have the memories of my dad and grandmother that I do. I hope you have some you can cling to as well.
Thoughts and prayers to you and your family and to your grandmother as you go through this process.
Post by seeyalater52 on Dec 1, 2018 13:26:25 GMT -5
Terrible week saga continues: had about 2k of work done on our pipes today (surprise!) and found out during that job that we need another $1700 of work done in a few weeks because our water pressure regulator is busted. It’s hopefully going to save us a lot of money in the long term both in terms of maintaining our plumbing system and appliances and while they’re doing it they’ll adjust our radiators as well which hopefully will save us money on gas.
It’s just so much money we weren’t planning on and while we can afford it it means the cosmetic changes I want to make to our dining room (new vinyl flooring) are tabled for the foreseeable future as is a vacation.
My Great grandmother, grandmother, and now my aunt have/had Alzheimers. I still remember when my cousin called to tell me my great grand passed away, I said, "that's good." I felt horrible about the words, in retrospect, but great grand had it for 11 years. Before that, she ran a large farm by herself for many years. It is such a hard transition to watch, like the reverse of growing up.
My grandmother had Alzheimer’s. My dad was on hospice before he died of cancer. I completely get what you mean about that sense of relief being part of the grief process.
Post by secretlyevil on Dec 1, 2018 21:38:44 GMT -5
My fourth and fifth holes have been partially closed since my honeymoon and I repierced my fourth hole Tuesday night because I insisted I had four earring holes.🙄
Post by centralsquare on Dec 1, 2018 21:50:13 GMT -5
I’m so sorry. My grandmother had dementia as well. It’s so awful, and the end is a mix of grief and relief and everything in between. Feel whatever you need to feel.
Post by jennybee1018 on Dec 2, 2018 0:44:59 GMT -5
cattledogkisses, I'm so sorry. My grandmother had dementia as well, and most days didn't know who we were when we went to visit. While I was sad, we really were all relieved when she passed, knowing that she was in a better place and no longer suffering. We were with her when she went, so we were just glad that she wasn't alone, even if she didn't quite remember us.
Definitely feel however you need to feel - it's complicated.
Post by picksthemusic on Dec 2, 2018 1:46:08 GMT -5
Some jerkwads just rang our doorbell (it’s almost 11 o’clock at night here), and after a few, we opened the door and saw that our door handle had been tied with a length of string to the street sign that is right in front of our house. DH cut the string but I made him stay inside in case someone was lurking outdoors. I’m sure it’s high schoolers being assholes but fuck, man.
H is away for the night so I’m trying to find a cheesy Christmas movie but omg they are all so bad. I turned off Christmas Inheritance and Christmas ghost? Last Christmas? Something like that. Now I’m trying Christmas in the Smokies. It’s still not good but better. I can handle cheese. I can’t handle just plain bad.
H is away for the night so I’m trying to find a cheesy Christmas movie but omg they are all so bad. I turned off Christmas Inheritance and Christmas ghost? Last Christmas? Something like that. Now I’m trying Christmas in the Smokies. It’s still not good but better. I can handle cheese. I can’t handle just plain bad.
The Christmas Chronicles on Netflix. Super cute. It’s more of a kids save Christmas than romantic hallmark type thing. But it was really good.
H is away for the night so I’m trying to find a cheesy Christmas movie but omg they are all so bad. I turned off Christmas Inheritance and Christmas ghost? Last Christmas? Something like that. Now I’m trying Christmas in the Smokies. It’s still not good but better. I can handle cheese. I can’t handle just plain bad.
Princess switch on Netflix. Cheesy, but Christmas magic!
H is away for the night so I’m trying to find a cheesy Christmas movie but omg they are all so bad. I turned off Christmas Inheritance and Christmas ghost? Last Christmas? Something like that. Now I’m trying Christmas in the Smokies. It’s still not good but better. I can handle cheese. I can’t handle just plain bad.
The Christmas Chronicles on Netflix. Super cute. It’s more of a kids save Christmas than romantic hallmark type thing. But it was really good.
I liked this one a lot. Kurt Russel as Santa was hilarious.