Question about dogs and hosting

[expectantsteelerfan]

If you have a dog, do you contain them in some way when you are hosting, or do you allow them to mingle with your guests?
Or if you are attending a party in someone's home, do you expect their dog(s) to be contained or loose?
And does size/temperament of the dog affect your answer?

I'm really struggling with this for the holidays.  We have a 2 year old Lab mix that is 50 lbs and super friendly, but unfortunately overly friendly.  She gets super excited when people come over.  She tries to jump on them when they first get there, and she licks indiscriminately (as in, she'll lick your hand if you're petting her, and if you stop she'll lick your shoes, your pants, whatever she can reach).  But we love her and she is part of our family.  She does settle down eventually, but gets riled up again as people come and go, and you can't leave food unattended in the living room (on the ottoman or on the furniture).  Food on tables is fine though.

We traditionally go to my aunt's on my side for Christmas Eve, and she has ALWAYS contained her dog(s) in the basement the entire time people are over.  They bark occasionally, but you can't really hear it except when you come in the door.  We go to my in-laws on Christmas day and most other big holidays.  My BIL and SIL both bring their dogs so they don't have to leave them at home the whole time.  But they are both 10 lb ish small dogs, one is so old it literally curls up on the couch and doesn't move until it's time to go.  The other was super hyper when it was younger, but has calmed down a lot, but still barks and is constantly under foot.

We have a finished basement with a door that closes it off from the main floor, and we could put the dog down there when people are over, but she would be super freaked out.  She would probably bark the entire time and scratch at the door unless someone was down there with her.  

So in my case, what is more annoying...a dog that jumps on your and licks you and gets hair all over you, or a dog that is barking and freaking out at the basement door?  

I do usually allow her to stay with us, because I know most of the people we have over are dog people too, but I was at a co-workers holiday party recently and their dog was contained in the bedroom.  And then my bff just had me keep her dog at our house with ours while she hosted her daughter's bday party at her house, so I don't know if it's common courtesy that I am breaking to not have her contained.

[hamster]

I have a similar dog.

He stays outside while people show up, and then we eventually let him in. If it's an outside party, we warn them if they don't already know. The exception is if my mom is here because he would just knock her over. So, basically, you get to deal with my dog as a package deal unless you have reason not to (so, allergies, fear, etc).

If he cant keep his shit together I will put him in our room for a break or back outside until he can calm down.

[imojoebunny]

My dogs are assholes. We have one huge party, where I take one of them and leave him with a friend down the street for the party, but mostly because I fear him getting out, with people coming in and out. Otherwise, the dogs calm down after a few minutes, even though they are annoying at first. I work with them a lot on waiting by the door, rather than rushing at people. It is a very slow process, but my older on is getting pretty good, at 3 years old, and doesn't jump on people anymore, and just barks for about 30 seconds, then goes back to his bed. I don't know how he would ever learn, if I locked him away.

[melmel48]

Any party I have been at has their dogs out, except for a friend who brings her dog to another friends house but only because a child guest is afraid of all dogs.

Are any of your guests not dog people? I love all dogs, so I want to see and play with the dog. However if you were to do either of your choices, as a guest I would prefer the dog to be out. It would be more uncomfortable for me to hear the dog barking and scratching than the dog being all over me. So I guess that was a long way of saying, I would leave the dog out to mingle. If she becomes bothersome maybe put her downstairs, but give her a chance to be with everyone!

[nessness]

I have three dogs - one large, two medium. I'll typically crate my dogs until after everyone arrives so they're not freaking out every time the doorbell rings, then let them out sometime once they're calm. I'll also crate them while we eat if they're begging, or if they're being annoying in general.

I don't care what other people do with their dogs, so long as they're not repeatedly jumping all over me.

[puppylove64]

I have a lab and a husky. Both are out of the puppy phase but still love people and attention. They would eat unattended food. If there are lots of people,I usually lock them up in their kennel or outside. Mil is scared of the lab so they are locked up if she comes. If it is just 2-3 people or other dog people, I would leave them out. Often if there are a lot of kids, the dogs would rather lay in their kennel then horseplay.

[icedcoffee]

For kids parties (birthday, baptism, etc) we send him to doggy daycare. For just a few people or parties where we know nobody would be terrified we just keep him out. We once tried crating him during the party and he ended up peeing his crate (even though we crate him all the time and he loves it). He would bark incessantly if we put him upstairs in a bedroom.

Unfortunately he is super food motivated and a huge counter surfer so we really have to watch him and it gets annoying. Sometimes we let his leash drag behind him and it usually stops the jumping. It’s tough.

[redheadk]

We have 3 small dogs. They don't have any interest in children (they are fine with kids but mostly avoid them) and follow my DH around so it works out fine to have them around when we host. My entry/playroom/dining room area is gated off from the rest of the house and my dogs mostly just go lay on the living room rug or hang out in the garage or backyard with DH. They don't bark except when people ring the doorbell. They don't lick.

We rarely host large group friend things but what we've done in the past is shut them in our bedroom/bathroom then let them come out once things have calmed down and they have calmed down. Again, they are separated from the kid area so it kind of works itself out.

My sister has a lab/pit mix that is under a year. He definitely needs to be contained while people are over. He never fully calms down, he licks, he's right at the perfect level to be in a small kids face with his head or tail, jumps on people, etc. He definitely cannot safely be around my grandmother.

We are dog people (obviously, we have 3!) but I do think that if people cannot avoid your dog if they would prefer or if he doesn't cool it with the jumping/licking beyond the initial excitement of seeing someone, he needs to be put away.

[dcn]

We don’t have dogs and I hate when dogs are all over people when we go to other houses.

[Deleted]

For parties with lots of kids, I'd lock them away. For adult parties, I wouldn't. My son is scared of larger dogs (and honestly I'm uncomfortable with larger dogs that jump on me) so I'd either have to hold him all night or leave if we were at a party with a large dog with him. I also don't trust dogs I don't know around my kids, or my kids with them (they're 6 and 3).

[brooke77]

We have a 75 lb dog with similar characteristics. He needs to greet everyone, but then will usually ignore our guests. He will absolutely steal food though if it is left down in his reach.

For smaller gatherings, we let him be. It gives him more anxiety to be separated from the group. For larger gatherings, we keep him contained to one area. It’s more for his safety than our guests, honestly. Most of our friends do not have pets and leave our front door wide open. I can keep an eye on it with small groups, but with big parties, I can’t keep an eye on every entrance and exit. My dog will absolutely run out the door, given a 1 second opportunity. For huge parties, we have also boarded him if we thought being separated from me with so many strangers in his house would cause him too much anxiety.

[luckystar2]

Our dog is a little over excitable but at least she’s only about 25lbs. She is out during parties/holidays. She would be more of an annoyance if she was created elsewhere. She’s bark her head off.

We generally try to take her for a run before people come over for holidays so she’s a little more calm. Generally once she gets over the initial excitement she calms down.

I like animals out at other people’s places. I’m an animal person. I want to see them/pet them! For holidays, it’s family so their pets are part of our family too.

[cincodemayo]

Our dog will jump on people when they first arrive but then calms down. Because of his size, though, we don’t usually keep him out when we have parties with kids. He is usually fine to go to our bedroom and nap while we have people over.

I will say it is pet peeve of mine when people have annoying dogs out at get togethers.Thanksgiving at H’s grandparents was ruined for me because his aunts dog was either licking us, begging us to throw her ball or barking right in my 2 year olds face, while the aunt didn’t pay attention. I think I would have been ok with the dog out if she would have at least tried to distract or discipline the dog.

[momin2013]

We don't have dogs, but I hate it when people have their dogs out when we're visiting if they're the type to jump up on me, lick me, etc.

[cricketwife]

When I go to parties, the dogs tend to be crated/ contained in some way. I’m trying to think of one when there weren’t. With that description you gave, I would appreciate that dog crated. I love dogs (we don’t have one because of money, space, etc) but I can’t stand a dog jumping all over me. My bff used to have two labs that jumped all over me EVERY time I came to visit. It’s really not pleasant eve if you love dogs, especially if you are presumably dressed up for a party. Also, I get the whole “they are a part of the family “ but you probably ;-) wouldn’t accept that behavior from other members of the family when guests were around.

[pooh8402]

I keep them in our bedroom if we're having a party and don't want them mingling. If they're house guests, I let the dogs roam.

I have an old golden retriever who is still excitable but calms down, and a Westie mix who doesnt like most people so she hides.

[ssmjlm]

You come to my house, you meet my dog. That said, my dog is really well behaved and literally only dislikes one person (who is a kid that traumatized her).

If we tell her to back off or go lay down, she will. Obviously if someone is allergic, we can separate her in another room, but we haven't had that issue yet.

I'm sure if I had another dog that wasn't as well behaved my answer would change, but we host a good chunk of friends and everyone pretty much comments on how well behaved she is and she's been that way even as a young dog until now.

Honestly I don't like when we go over to people's houses and the dogs are away, but bark the whole time. It's more distracting than the 10 minutes or so that it would take them to smell me out and then get over it. 

ETA: We had friends who would crate their dog in the kitchen.  I mean everyone can see the dog and he would just look so sad in there.  He wasn't a bad dog, but he was 100lbs of retriever and a lot of people get intimidated by dogs of that size.  It just sat with me the wrong way.  She only did it for bigger gatherings, not just DH and I, b/c really he was just a big lump who wanted love.  He would happily sit and let you pet his head for however long you wanted.

[MittenState]

One of my dogs gets anxious so we keep her contained and feeling safe. The puppy is crazy so we keep him in his crate until people have settled and eaten and voice if they would like to interact with him.

[audry80]

My dog is a jerk and is territorial over our house. When we have people over, we leash him for the first hour or until he demonstrates he is behaving. The leash allows him to not be crated but easy to correct his bad behaviors by a tugging at him. 

[namasteak]

Since your dog is a jumper/licker I would put them in the basement. Its not that I don't like dogs (I love them and we have 1) but I really don't like it when they jump & lick me so as a guest I would be really annoyed.

Maybe you can get a thunder shirt or doggie Xanax for this Christmas and work on training them to stop those behaviors for future events?

[vanillacourage]

The way you describe your dog, I wouldn’t be stoked as a guest, sorry.  I understand a bit of excitement when guests arrive but I wouldn’t want a dog in my face or licking me all night. For casual get together with just a few people it’s not as big deal, but with a lot of guests, a big holiday or if people are dressed up I’d find another solution. Can the dog hang at a neighbor’s house, can you hire a teenager to just be on their phone with your dog in your bedroom/basement, or can you board the dog for the night?

[pugz]

We crate her when we are hosting parties (or put her in the backyard when the weather is nice. For guests without kids she gets to be out like normal. With guests with kids she is crated more. She sleeps all day and rarely barks so she is fine bring crated during the day.

She sheds a lot so guests have to deal, nothing we can do about that but provide lint rollers

[krystee]

Our dogs are counter surfers and jumpers, so they get boarded for the day. They like it better than being stuck in a room and hearing all the noise. That is like torture to them.

[erbear]

We had two big dogs. One would get super excited when people came and jump around (though not on people), then lay back down (we'd hold her back when people came in and she was fine). The other wouldn't even get up off his bed. We left them out when we had people over and they pretty much ignored everyone.

That said, I'd be annoyed if someone's dog kept jumping on me and licking me at a party. I like dogs, but if they are annoying the guests, I'd put them away. Also, my younger DD is really scared of dogs so I'd be doubly annoyed if I had a dog licking me while I was holding a scared child.

So I guess my answer is: if the dog is well behaved and not bothering people, I'd leave him out. If not, I'd put him away or kennel.

[lolo]

I stopped attending a family event because dogs were permitted to run wild. It was not enjoyable at all and no one cared that my daughter was anxious about it all.

[jorja]

Yeah, I would really not enjoy being jumped on and licked as a guest.

[rubysoh0]

We keep our dogs crated while hosting events.

[fancynewbeesly]

If there is a lot of people we crate her in our room. She is super excitable but loving. However she will run if you open the door so we can’t risk it. Now our new puppy is calm and lazy as can be. 😊 So with her the answer may be different.

[icedcoffee]

This thread is making me feel a little defensive for my dog. LOL. I hope we’re not one of those households you all hate.

[abs]

Huh. My daughter is terrified of dogs. Like I mean she has a severe phobia. Dogs outside on a leash? They are fine. Dogs inside? Nope. She cries every time. The only dog she’s ever been okay with is my cousin’s who won’t jump or lick.

Anyways most friends who have dogs always lock up their dogs for DD. I’ve always felt weird about it but I guess it’s common and no big deal? FWIW I never expect them to. Dogs are family.

Anyways I would not love your dog OP but I also never expect anyone to crate or lock up their dog unless they are aggressive.