I am a hot second pregnant as a surrogate after an embryo transfer last Friday. I have had 4 days of bfp’s and go for my first beta Sunday when I’ll be 4 weeks.
I was here with all 3 of my kiddos and now with this surro babe!
I would love to hear more about how you came to be a surrogate (or gestational carrier?) if you are willing to share, because it's something I've been entertaining. One of my best friends has struggled through years of IF and multiple losses trying for their first, and I've given some thought to, what if I could help? I haven't talked to her about it yet because I'm trying to think through how I would feel about surrogacy vs. acting as a gestational carrier, etc. for myself before I bring it up with her. It would be a while anyway until I could, since I'm pregnant now and will need time to recover before it could be an option. But definitely something I'd be interested to hear more about.
Very cool! How did you get involved in surrogacy? Is it for someone you already knew? (feel free to ignore if I'm being too nosy!)
I am technically a gestational carrier as I did not donate my eggs through this. I think I would have a really hard time separating from a baby at the end of this if it was genetically mine. My oldest DD was conceived through IUI and Clomid and because of that i have a greater appreciation for the struggle that so many families go through to achieve a pregnancy or a baby. I have had 3 text book pregnancies, I’ve never had a day of morning sickness even, and so this is a way I can help give back. I went into this working with an agency and no particular family to carry for. They take care of it all and matched me with an amazing family.
Susie as far as the process, because I’m working with an agency it’s different than if you did an independent match. I went through psychological Evals, a huge medical workup required by the clinic I’m working with (CCRM), a legal process to draw up documents and then a month of meds and hormones before the embryo transfer. I’m an RN and an open book so feel free to ask questions! .
Thank you speyedr . I have been thinking that I'd be willing to be a gestational carrier but not sure if I could do surrogacy. I live on the opposite coast now from my friend (which would make all of this hard I think?), but our families are still close, we vacation together, etc. I think it would be hard for me (and hard to eventually explain to all the kids?) if I donated an egg, and my friend's kid was biologically related to my kids and I. Plus I'm guessing age would be an issue; I am already 37. By the time I'd be recovered from this pregnancy, I would be pretty old to donate an egg.
This is my 2nd pregnancy, and so far everything's been smooth sailing. I had gestational diabetes last time, but it was well managed and I don't have type II. I delivered quickly and easily. So carrying another pregnancy seems (while kind of miserable to me) like something I could reasonably do, if it would help them. My friend is an only child and her H doesn't have sisters (not sure about any SILs but I don't think so), so they don't have family that could do it.
How many embryos did you have transferred? I have been thinking about how I feel about 1 vs. 2.
What are you planning in terms of leave to recover after the birth? I assume it will be shorter than a typical maternity leave, but curious what is "normal" for a gestational carrier.
Susie the family I am carrying for live in NYC and I’m closer to the west coast. It hasn’t been an issue yet and will be interesting as this progresses. The baby will be born where I am and the family will be here for the delivery and remain here until baby is cleared to fly by a pediatrician. We only transferred 1 embryo, which was something I insisted upon before I was matched. They found me a family who shared that wish. I really don’t want to carry twins and so I wanted to reduce that risk as much as I could.
I will probably take off 6-8 weeks, until I’m cleared to return to work by my OB.