I don't remember being specifically taught, but I'm sure there was some basic instruction. I was already doing my own baths for a while before I started showering so I don't think I needed a ton of help, but I imagine things like "here's how to turn on the shower, here's how to keep shampoo out of your eyes" were probably covered.
I had long hair as a kid, and my mom washed it until I was pretty old - maybe 9. I remember her teaching me to wash my hair. I think she gave me a quick explanation of how to shave my legs when I started. I don't remember being taught how to wash my body.
Post by twilightmv on May 15, 2019 10:14:02 GMT -5
Not specifically. I have a vague memory of being proud that I was able to wash my own hair, so I assume a lesson proceeded that.
@ I taught my kids to shower at 5 but I still wash their hair. If it’s a night where they aren’t washing their hair, I taught them to rinse their hair, how much soap to use, an order for cleaning body parts, and how to rinse their bodies. I find that Dove whipped soap is perfect for young kids. It foams super quickly. I will likely have the almost 7 year old take over his hair soon.
Post by litebright on May 15, 2019 10:33:52 GMT -5
I honestly don't remember. I do remember my mom teaching me how to shave my legs. But I don't think I got that kind of instruction for body washing.
FTR: -Shampoo -Wash face or wash body -Conditioner -Wash whichever of face/body that I haven't yet -Shave if I'm going to
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It is really hard to teach your kids certain things. Like how to tell when they have reached just the right amount of conditioner left in their hair so they don't look like greaseballs when it dries, but there's still enough to help with detangling. My 11YO and 9YO still don't get it consistently and it is really frustrating, because I feel like I have explained it over and over, showed them how it feels, etc. and I don't know what more to do.
I do not remember being taught, but am sure I was.
This one something where you wouldn’t remember it (unless it’s traumatic or includes a strong response of some kind) because we’re young and our brains don’t retain everything, particularly the mundane.
I do not remember being taught, but am sure I was.
This one something where you wouldn’t remember it (unless it’s traumatic or includes a strong response of some kind) because we’re young and our brains don’t retain everything, particularly the mundane.
I was thinking this also. I don’t remember, but I am sure I was given some basic instructions. I have “taught” my kids but I doubt they will remember. My instructions didn’t really get into an order like people are talking about bc personally I don’t think it matters. I have boys and they aren’t doing conditioning treatments or whatever. I just showed them how to get a lather and make sure to get behind your ears, under your arms, all up around your private areas, between your toes lol, remind them to rinse their hair really well. That’s about it.
Ditto this word for word. I was in some pretty embarrassing situations as a child because i wasn't really taught this stuff. I make it a point to tell my kids how to take care of their needs and make sure that they have everything that they need to do it.
That stuff sticks with you! I’m still scared I smell, that people are staring at me because I look like an idiot, etc. I had a nervous breakdown last year when my IBD caused some physical symptoms and my H gave me permission to spend whatever I needed to in order to feel safe in my skin. (I don’t need his permission to spend money; we made it a need in our budget instead of a want).
The weird/sad part is that my parents have no clue what they actually did to us. They think we just learned this stuff on our own like we learned to read. My mother is so proud of our homes and the meals I make for holidays. I did her makeup for my wedding, and she brags about it to this day. I’m pretty sure I’ll never tell them how much I was teased for not understanding basic hygiene.
I am sorry this was your experience. Just out of curiosity, what did you feel like you needed to be taught. I want to make sure I am covering the basics!
When I transitioned to showers, I was young enough that I would yell for my Mom to come put the shampoo in my hair. I guess that's the only part she helped me with back then. My routine:
Shampoo Wash face Rinse out shampoo Conditioner Wash body Rinse out conditioner Shave (sometimes)
I don't, but we're definitely having to teach our 7-8yo's to shower. And it boggles my mind how they just don't get it or remember to clean everything - regardless of order!
No. I took showers with my parents until I was too old to shower with them. Then I showered solo. I think kids learn this stuff by osmosis or by being taught over time.
@@@ I work with my 3yo now on how to wash his body, and he sometimes practices washing or rinsing his hair. I know he will eventually get it but it will take time. Like brushing teeth. I know I was taught how to brush teeth over time, and eventually, I started doing it correctly. Just like we're teaching our son now. He practices, then I go after him and finish up.
Post by DotAndBuzz on May 15, 2019 12:17:51 GMT -5
I don’t remember being taught that. I do remember my mom “teaching” me to shave my legs (FINALLY, in 8th grade when I was a hairy beast). She told me I had to do it in the bath, with soap, and after about 4 times, I was like “fuck that, I’m doing this in the shower.” But it took me forever to use shaving cream because she wouldn’t buy it for me, insisting “soap is fine.”
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H is in charge of bedtime/baths, so since he hated giving baths, he’s had the girls showering since they were about 4. He would be in the bathroom, and when they were little the curtain would be half open so he could help, but since they’ve been about 6, they do it on their own.
I do remember instructing them on how to wash their privates though. He turfed that to me, and that’s fine. Although N described it to MIL as “scraping my bagina” one visit (they spend a week with each set of grandparents in the summer), so that was an interesting phone call, as she was 1) horrified that we used the word vagina, and 2) asking why she was being told to scrape anything down there. For the record, she was not, lol.
My mom is weird about bodies and nudity. I can't figure out if she was just trying to respect privacy? Didn't think it needed to be taught? Figured we would learn the hard way?
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And I'm adamant about doing it with my kids. Because I remember when I got a whiff of myself in 6th grade and realized I was too pungent. I don't want my kids to have to learn the hard way.
I don't remember being taught but I don't think my parents gave me much guidance. I have two younger brothers and I remember them getting yelled at all the time by my parents because they would not rinse shampoo from their hair properly or it seemed like they didn't really use soap, but I think it's because no one told them how. I learned about periods and shaving and other girl stuff from my friends.
My order in the shower is: Shampoo and rinse Conditioner Shave Wash body Apply leave in moisturizer on body Wash face Rinse hair
It's been a long time, but my mom gave me an idea of how to bathe/shower, and basic hygiene. I just don't remember the specifics of what she said and when she said it.
Our girls asked far more questions than I ever did, but we were also more open with them than our parents were. I know my daughter had worked to make sure that her boys understand the hows and whys of good hygiene.
I feel like my H's shower order is wrong, and he disagrees with mine. I feel like my way is more efficient and saves time....or maybe his way is just as efficient, but he is just slow. ;p Neither of us is going to change, so whatever works goes. lol
My shower routine: Shampoo (I use a conditioning shampoo for curly hair, so I apply that and leave it on) Cleanse face, rinse (If I am doing a deep conditioning for my hair, this is where I would rinse off the conditioning shampoo and apply the deep conditioner, otherwise the conditioning shampoo stays on) Wash body, legs, feet Rinse everything from the top down
Moisturize from the shoulders down before I leave the shower stall and from the neck up when I am out of the shower.
Post by aliciabella on May 15, 2019 16:32:07 GMT -5
But with shaving? No. It was weird as my mom just avoided it and refused to talk about it so I would steal my dad's razors and cut the shit out of my legs, lol. Then my mom called me out in front of ALL her friends. It was embarrassing and a part of why I am messed up I am VERY light skinned, like Wentworth Miller light, so I got away with not shaving for a long time.
I honestly don't remember. I do remember my mom teaching me how to shave my legs. But I don't think I got that kind of instruction for body washing.
FTR: -Shampoo -Wash face or wash body -Conditioner -Wash whichever of face/body that I haven't yet -Shave if I'm going to
@@@@@@
It is really hard to teach your kids certain things. Like how to tell when they have reached just the right amount of conditioner left in their hair so they don't look like greaseballs when it dries, but there's still enough to help with detangling. My 11YO and 9YO still don't get it consistently and it is really frustrating, because I feel like I have explained it over and over, showed them how it feels, etc. and I don't know what more to do.
@@ On the conditioner— we struggle with this too. Pantene makes a conditioning foam that’s kind of a mousse texture that works really well for my kids.
I wasn’t taught most things related to being an adult. I taught myself how to cook, clean, take care of my physical self, and to take care of my surroundings.
Ditto this word for word. I was in some pretty embarrassing situations as a child because i wasn't really taught this stuff. I make it a point to tell my kids how to take care of their needs and make sure that they have everything that they need to do it.
This for me too. I had a few hygiene embarrassing moments too. I took baths until middle school and then started showers. Even then, I didn't learn how to wash until my grandmother asked questions like "did you remember to..." in a kind way so I knew for next time and even bought me face washing products to help with puberty acne.
Post by DesertMoon on May 15, 2019 19:06:20 GMT -5
Yes. I also bathed my younger siblings since I was 5 and 7 years older than them. I remember my mom explaining how to scrub my scalp how to use conditioner and how to wash my lady bits without getting soap in my hole. Important info IMO.
These threads always make me think my childhood was more traumatic than I remember, because I have no recollection of when I switched from baths to showers, or really, many memories from childhood at all.
but I can tell you my current shower routine. Shampoo wash neck down conditioner wash face and anything else that needs medicated soap shave when needed (and that is very flexible) rinse hair that isn’t rinsed from other movement
These threads always make me think my childhood was more traumatic than I remember, because I have no recollection of when I switched from baths to showers, or really, many memories from childhood at all.
but I can tell you my current shower routine. Shampoo wash neck down conditioner wash face and anything else that needs medicated soap shave when needed (and that is very flexible) rinse hair that isn’t rinsed from other movement
im thinking the same thing! But I do remember the time my dad was drying my hair and accidentally tore the earring out of my ear. 😢
I am pretty sure I was left to do this on my own. I learned other things on my own as well, but that had a lot to do with my parents' hands-off approach. I remember that I learned you were supposed to clean behind your ears based off of some television show.
I am pretty sure I was left to do this on my own. I learned other things on my own as well, but that had a lot to do with my parents' hands-off approach. I remember that I learned you were supposed to clean behind your ears based off of some television show.
Um, I may get called out as totally disgusting but I’m not sure I’ve ever cleaned behind my ears. Doesn’t that area get cleaned when you shampoo?
I do pay attention to my ears if I’ve been wearing the same studs for multiple days and the earrings and my ear lobes need cleaning.
I am pretty sure I was left to do this on my own. I learned other things on my own as well, but that had a lot to do with my parents' hands-off approach. I remember that I learned you were supposed to clean behind your ears based off of some television show.
Um, I may get called out as totally disgusting but I’m not sure I’ve ever cleaned behind my ears. Doesn’t that area get cleaned when you shampoo?
I do pay attention to my ears if I’ve been wearing the same studs for multiple days and the earrings and my ear lobes need cleaning.
I suggest the next time you’re in the shower after you’ve washed your hair, take a fingernail and scratch behind you ear. That should answer your question.
No, we only had a bathtub growing up. By the time Dad installed a shower when I was a preteen I was waaaaay too old for me to want to hear any kind of discussion like that from him. I pretty much just read the instructions on my shampoo and was like OK, it makes the most sense to shampoo and rinse my hair first, then put conditioner in and let it sit while I wash my body, then rinse everything. I also learned from experience to take showers as quickly as possible at my mom's apartment because the bathroom was freezing cold and unheated and the hot water ran out fast. That's probably part of why I still just prioritize stinky parts.