opinion needed while I over think this

[mustardseed2007]

DS hasn't connected well with the other boys in his class because he's not a boys boy. I'm having two playdates next week before school starts to try to help him connect a little. Since it's hot I'm kind of struggling with what to suggest. Of course one we could just have them over to play and DS could play toys with him or play video games. 

Also I was thinking for one of them to do a meet up at Chuck E Cheese. Is that a good idea or a terrible idea? Thoughts? 

DS doesnt do great at a lot of indoor play places like trampoline parks and whatnot because he's afraid of heights....   I'm just trying to figure out an environment where he can put his best foot forward. DS doesn't want to do a play date at the pool for some reason. Maybe because he's not a strong swimmer and can't do the diving board, which most of the kids his age can. 

[waverly]

It's a medium idea. I think it could be fun. I also think the tokens for the games could be a bit expensive plus pizza.

We've done the park/ playground, bouncy house place (but not trampoline place) or McDonald's play structure type. We've also done the pool, but that can be hard with various swim levels for example 2 girls weren't great swimmers and couldn't touch and would sink, so I am sure that is a bit more stressful on the parents. The playground tends to be the most low key and cheapest idea as long as the weather cooperates.

I also think your house is fine, but if they haven't been there before be prepared for the parents to stay and get to know you.  Some parents I have noticed prefer not to do the house thing, but I think it is fine if you offer.  You can suggest a couple of things and let them pick also.

[sdlaura]

Is there a splash pad where you could meet that doesn't involve going in a pool? Or maybe you could do a playground earlier in the day when it's a little cooler?

For my DS1, we had to fill out sort of a kindergarten intake form, and there was a space to write down names of kids that your child does well with (so they can try to put them in class together). I wrote down 3 girls. I hadn't really realized before that he has more girl friends.

We did have a playdate at our house once with another boy, and the other boy just wanted to do sports-like stuff the whole time, while DS1 wanted to play more quietly with his toys or do art.

[186momx]

Coming from a mom with a DD who also doesn't fit in with the girls in her class I would do a playdate at home and find some fun activities that your DS enjoys.
Ideas
Water gun fight with targets in the back yard
Stomp rockets
science lab/experiments
with video games at the end

FYI DD hung with 3 boys all of 1st grade her teacher called them the 4 amigos. Fast forward to 2nd and all 3 boys were in the other class and refused to play with her because she was a girl which broke her heart. DD tried to hang with some girls but she just isn't into playing mommy & babies, Hatchimals, Barbie's so she hung by herself at recess until she found a couple 3rd graders who like horses and could do cartwheels in the grass with her but this wasn't until spring. I've given up on trying to foster school friendships as it just stresses us all out too much.

[katiecj6]

When I take my DS (10) to any video game place, he totally zones out on a game and doesn't interact with anyone.

So it wouldn't be my choice for a playdate with the goal of connecting with other kids.

I would have the playdate at home.

[k3am]

Side question... has DS asked for these play dates or are they your idea?

[mustardseed2007]

Aug 8, 2019 21:00:37 GMT -5 k3am said:

Side question... has DS asked for these play dates or are they your idea?

This is a very good question.

His preference is to do a Playdate with a girl who is unfortunately not going to be at our school next year. We’ve had some play dates with her this summer.

During the year he had asked for play dates with each of the boys at various times, but hasn’t asked Lately. The girls all seem to do play dates with each other fairly often but not with the boys, and I kind of get that.

ETA: also ds suggested a meet up at Chuck E. Cheese or the science museum. He did not want to meet at the park or bc he days the boy would probably want to race or something and ds doesn’t like that. I can see that hole might be better though. I don’t think the science museum is a good idea for a play date.

[ilovelucyvv]

The zoo? Ours has a splash pad in it and Ive been to ones that have playgrounds.

Go see a movie? Not very social but nice and cool this time of year.

[abs]

Frozen yogurt/ice cream/snow cone place?

We do movies and snow cone dates pretty frequently in the summer.

DD is 8 and hasn't enjoyed Chuck E Cheese in at least two years. I don't know that I would suggest that depending on the age of your kid.

[erinshelley21]

I say just have the boys over and see how it plays out. Chuck e Cheese would make it easy for them to not interact. Plus the games could get competitive and it doesnt sound like that would go over well with your DS.

Just have them come over for like an hour or so and let them entertain themselves. If they look like they are getting bored, offer suggestions. My DS has NO problem playing with other kids toys and will even play with his own with more excitement if someone is here to play with him.

Does your yard have room for a sprinkler?

[mustardseed2007]

abs, he's 7. Thanks guys!

[mommyatty]

I’ve been doing the same thing in reverse with DD who is 7. All her friends are boys, and we are getting to the age where birthday parties and such are single gender. I knew of 2 other girls who also haven’t clicked with many girls in their grade, and we had them over to swim. One of them is now her “BFF” since they also clicked at camp.

I was sad for DD this year when one of her best buddies didn’t invite her to his video game party. She didn’t mind bc she hates video games. But his mom laughed and told me (voluntarily, I didn’t ask!) he wanted to invite “all the boys in first grade and Addy.” She told him if he invited one girl, he had to invite them all. He chose no girls then.

[mustardseed2007]

And yes our yard has a room for sprinklers and I like the idea of water gun targets.