isabel this is a case where you need to focus on not letting perfect be the enemy of good. If you don’t manage your goal this week, but you get to the gym that’s excellent. Next week hopefully you’ll be back on track with 3 times.
I try to do something every day that involves moving. This week I’m having an excellent week because my schedule and time are allowing for it and I’ve done some sort of advanced exercise three days in a row. Come spring, when work is in its busy season, I’ll be lucky to squeeze 2-3 short runs in each week. Instead of letting it demotivate me I’ll take each week as it comes and remember that doing something is always better than doing nothing.
In the abstract, I totally get that. In practice, I'm terrible at it. I'm a very 'all or nothing' kind of person, so it's tough for me to manage expectations like that.
Post by cinnamoncox0 on Jan 8, 2020 16:22:59 GMT -5
isabel I have that same type of mentality oh I should just quit if/when something gets in the way of my exercise or eating plans. What I’m trying this year and it’s been working since 1/2 so no too long lol, I workout two days in a row skip a day then two in a row then skip and will keep that up as long as it’s sustainable. I have three kids and work and I need to be realistic while balancing actually working out. Also try to do certain mileage on bike vs time. So if I’m antsy I can just ride faster to get it over with instead of skipping altogether because I can’t do a certain time for one reason or another.
isabel, I’m seconding the not letting the perfect being the enemy of the good. I’ve missed two days this week but trying not to just spiral into “oh I broke my New Years resolution.” Nope. Today is a new day, and today I am going to make it happen!
@silva, if you are needing wine to get to sleep, it’s probably not great sleep. Do you practice good sleep hygiene? (I’m notoriously bad about this.) If melatonin isn’t helping, you can try doxylamine six I ate (active ingredient in Unisom Sleep Tabs) - usually 12.5mg (half a tab) is enough for me, but if I have extra time to sleep, I might take a whole one. If nothing OTC works, talk to your doctor. There are several options.
I want to reward myself too, but I think I was struggling with putting a defined limit on being able to achieve my goal. Like, if I say I want to go to the gym 3x a week for 4 weeks, but then one week I only hit 2 days, I know I'm the type to get defeated and stop going altogether. So having a goal like, "row 50,000 meters" seems a lot more achievable to me since there isn't a set limit on it. It also feels like I'm chipping away at something, which is helpful.
That is a good goal! Don't put time limits on things if that doesn't keep you motivated or work for your life. Treat yourself after you make it to X number of classes or row X miles or whatever fits!
I think what I'm going to attempt is to make my goal to maintain whatever I do this month. I procrastinated so long on physical therapy and now that I'm working toward fixing my issues I'm particularly motivated, so if I can do X workouts this month, I'll try to make that my pace for next month too. That's separate of any reward, more just the mental acknowledgement that I did it once, I can do it again.
I like this! I might do this. Or make my goal to just beat my previous month. So, if I bike 40 miles in January, then getting 41 in February is good instead of trying to do some random numbers I pulled out of my arse.
isabel this is a case where you need to focus on not letting perfect be the enemy of good. If you don’t manage your goal this week, but you get to the gym that’s excellent. Next week hopefully you’ll be back on track with 3 times.
I try to do something every day that involves moving. This week I’m having an excellent week because my schedule and time are allowing for it and I’ve done some sort of advanced exercise three days in a row. Come spring, when work is in its busy season, I’ll be lucky to squeeze 2-3 short runs in each week. Instead of letting it demotivate me I’ll take each week as it comes and remember that doing something is always better than doing nothing.
In the abstract, I totally get that. In practice, I'm terrible at it. I'm a very 'all or nothing' kind of person, so it's tough for me to manage expectations like that.
Like the others, this is something I'm trying to work on too.
The discussion in the intuitive eating book about assigning moral value to the choices we make while trying to diet really resonated with me.
Under ordinary circumstances, most of us would not say, "I didn't get to read a few more chapters in my book today, so I won't be able to hit my goal of finishing it by Sunday, and because of that, I may as well not bother to try to read what I can this weekend even though I am enjoying it and can finish it next week."
I'm trying to think of exercise like that. It's moral value is no different from watching TV or reading this board or going to a restaurant or walking my dog. When stuff gets in the way of doing the activity I planned, I just do the activity another time.
The other benefit of thinking of this is that I'm starting to find that because my brain is starting to see it as interchangeable with watching TV, I find I am more inclined to do it when I'd otherwise make an excuse not to skip it.
On Christmas morning, I had not been to the gym in two weeks because my month was batshit and any free time I had I just wanted to lay on the couch and do nothing. That morning, H and I walked the dogs and opened presents and ate stollen and did some prep for dinner. And then around noon, I realized I had a few hours before my friends came over and I had all this free time, and actually thought, "score, I get to go to the gym, finally!" So I actually went to the gym on Christmas day (it's the free workout room in my apartment building, so it was open) because my mind was not "It's a holiday, it's ok to be bad."
isabel I do pretty much the opposite of what everyone else says — I don’t keep track of how much I go to the gym or how much I run/walk AT ALL. I used to do that and it led to compulsive exercise. I go when I can, and try to adjust my schedule when I’m able to. I have a scheduled class I go to on Sunday mornings, we also have an app-enabled bike, and I do walking/jogging outside and go to the gym some too.
I’d say most weeks I do some kind of exercise 3-6 days a week depending on the week. Not keeping track means I don’t stress about whether it’s 3 days or 6. I exercise as much as I practically can, and do a wide variety of activities, so knowing that it was “only” 3 days wouldn’t have made it possible to do any more than I already did....so I just don’t keep track.
ETA: I do activities that I like and that make me feel good, so I’m motivated to do them. I don’t do any kind of exercise that feels like a chore.
isabel I do pretty much the opposite of what everyone else says — I don’t keep track of how much I go to the gym or how much I run/walk AT ALL. I used to do that and it led to compulsive exercise. I go when I can, and try to adjust my schedule when I’m able to. I have a scheduled class I go to on Sunday mornings, we also have an app-enabled bike, and I do walking/jogging outside and go to the gym some too.
I’d say most weeks I do some kind of exercise 3-6 days a week depending on the week. Not keeping track means I don’t stress about whether it’s 3 days or 6. I exercise as much as I practically can, and do a wide variety of activities, so knowing that it was “only” 3 days wouldn’t have made it possible to do any more than I already did....so I just don’t keep track.
ETA: I do activities that I like and that make me feel good, so I’m motivated to do them. I don’t do any kind of exercise that feels like a chore.
Yeah- you said what I was trying to say. The year I did the most exercise? I didn't track at all. I went because it felt good and made me feel good mentally and physically. My brain and body operated better. If I was down, I realized that getting some exercise would break the funk. And then I decided to "challenge myself" do "more" the next year and I didn't. I put pressure on myself. I should know better that that doesn't work for me. So, I'm going back to day by day.
I'm trying to drastically cut down my wine consumption, but now I can't fall asleep or stay asleep. Melatonin isn't helping anymore, my last resort is CBD oil, but it's so expensive.
Can you try Benadryl? I need to take it every night to help me sleep
isabel yes start with the Intuitive Eating book that ESF linked. Other good ones are the new one called Anti-Diet by Christy Harrison (she has a podcast too) and not 100% an intuitive eating book but really helpful and funny is The Fuck It Diet.
Post by Patsy Baloney on Jan 8, 2020 22:27:07 GMT -5
If anyone is looking to add more activity at home and has a Nintendo Switch, check out Ring Fit. I put it on my Christmas list this year and my H and I have finally gotten around to hooking it up and giving it a try. It’s so fun!
Your character carries a ring (and so do you, it’s about a foot in diameter) and you wear a thigh strap with a controller in it so it can feel your movement. You and your character run through courses and fight enemies with aerobic, strength, and yoga-based exercises. The better your form, the more power you have when you attack. Every few levels, you fight this big bad dragon guy who’s a muscled up jerk. I love video games, and the fighting aspect has made it really fun. I got a little too into it tonight with the attack squats, so walking is looking a little sketchy tomorrow, lol.
I’ve been trying to add more activity in my day because I sleep and feel better when I do a little something (I’m not super into exercise) and this has been a nice little something to add.
I was going to post something, but I see it is already sort of being talked about. I started in Nov just walking on an incline. I feel like people are giving me crap because I am not doing a full sweaty work out (my DH). I have expressed to them that I want to do something wearing whatever I am wearing, and in whatever shoes as long as they are walkable. It seems to them and a bit to me, to be not good enough. Like I should be trying to lose weight, and of course I have weight I could lose, cant we all, but that wasn't the point. The point is for it to be sustainable, for it to be sooo easy that I can't sit there and talk myself out of it, for me to go as I am instead of needing a whole wardrobe change. The point was to be strong and to have less cellulite. And honestly, I am stronger and I have less cellulite and that looks so much better. But there is a part of me that is disappointed that I am not losing weight and disappointed that I am not losing inches, although part of me suspects that I might be losing inches because it feels slightly less love handles, but it is so slow. Part of me is disappointed it is slow, like 2 months of this has resulted in not much, but that is also the point. It's hard to wrap my head around it, but the point is if I diet and exercise I will eventually stop dieting and exercising. But if I just try to eat slightly healthier and walk a little bit I can do that forever, right?
I was going to post something, but I see it is already sort of being talked about. I started in Nov just walking on an incline. I feel like people are giving me crap because I am not doing a full sweaty work out (my DH). I have expressed to them that I want to do something wearing whatever I am wearing, and in whatever shoes as long as they are walkable. It seems to them and a bit to me, to be not good enough. Like I should be trying to lose weight, and of course I have weight I could lose, cant we all, but that wasn't the point. The point is for it to be sustainable, for it to be sooo easy that I can't sit there and talk myself out of it, for me to go as I am instead of needing a whole wardrobe change. The point was to be strong and to have less cellulite. And honestly, I am stronger and I have less cellulite and that looks so much better. But there is a part of me that is disappointed that I am not losing weight and disappointed that I am not losing inches, although part of me suspects that I might be losing inches because it feels slightly less love handles, but it is so slow. Part of me is disappointed it is slow, like 2 months of this has resulted in not much, but that is also the point. It's hard to wrap my head around it, but the point is if I diet and exercise I will eventually stop dieting and exercising. But if I just try to eat slightly healthier and walk a little bit I can do that forever, right?
ANY movement is good. Walking is one of the best things you can do for your long-term health. Of course other things are good too (lights weight training is good for your bones, cardio to get your heart rate up), but the best kind of exercise is the kind that you will do. You know this — they are being pompous assholes. Keep walking!
waverly, your post really resonated with me. I too want to do something, anything, that's convenient, at least to get the exercise started. There's a lake near me, and I walked it several times last week, but since being back at work this week, I'm getting home too late in the day to go--it's dark. It's also too slippery to go if the path is wet (I tried it, almost fell several times). I'm thinking about checking out the yoga videos on YouTube somebody posted. I could do that when I get home from work, before I make dinner. I won't be "the sweaty mess" either, and I worry about the moral judgment of that.
ESF, I have been very aware recently of the moral judgments people make about food. I was just watching RHNJ and Jackie was talking about food. She kept saying BAD FOOD/GOOD FOOD and I was cringing through the whole scene--food is not inherently good or bad. It also bothers me when people say they CAN'T have a certain food (save allergies or intolerances). It's not that you CAN'T have it, it's that you are CHOOSING not to have it, and THAT'S OK! I liken it to money/budgets--I think there's a big difference between not being able to legitimately afford something, and not choosing to spend money a certain way.
The biggest takeaway for me in my journey is that I'm down 40 since June 2019 and I have another 15 to go to be in the "normal" (that's cringe-y too) BMI range (that's how I picked the #), all without purposefully exercising. I move about during the day quite a bit, but that is definitely different from planned workouts. It was all about the food--knowing what I was eating, making better choices when eating out, and listening to how my body reacts to different kinds of food (e.g. I feel very sleepy when I eat bread/pasta/chips). That's what kept me motivated all these months.
I will have to mindfully eat for the rest of my life. I've been up and down this damn yo-yo for too damn long--so here I am, and I've made peace with it.
waverly, FWIW walking is the only exercise my mom has done consistently for basically my whole life. She walks daily, weather permitting. She just turned 69. She’s not super thin. I think she wears about a 12 or 14. But she is healthy and happy and has energy to do what she wants. When she moved and had to find a new primary care physician, her doctor was amazed that at her age, she’s not on a single prescription medication. When she gets sick, she doesn’t heal as quickly as she once did because she’s 69. But she’s in great health.
I say this as perspective that it truly isn’t all about weight or inches. Seeing what a fulfilling life she lives in retirement is one of the things that motivates me to live a healthy-ish lifestyle. If you never lose a pound or an inch, you will still be better off for being active.
@angryharpy and that is a great example of health at every size!
I used to be the same size as her. (I was born old, so yes, I did borrow my mom’s clothes in HS.) I wish so badly I could go back to that girl and ,age her not hate her body and not diet. If I’d just stayed that size, I’d be soooo much thinner than I am now! I’m still struggling with HAES and accepting where I am at the moment. I’m trying, though.
I saw my dietician today for the first time this year and we talked about movement a that's what I want to tackle next. She is asked if I could remember a time in my life that I actually enjoyed exercise and yeah, it was in college, which was over 15 years ago and over 100lbs ago! I have equated exercise with pain and punishment since then. So I have a lot of unlearning to do
@angryharpy I feel you. My husband's work holiday party is this weekend and a friend was going out to buy a dress today and I thought "how nice to just know you can easily go buy a dress for an event in 2 days".... I have to plan well in advance and order a bunch online to try on. Dress Barn was basically my only in store option for dresses and they are gone now. The stuff Torrid carries in store skews way too young but there is decent stuff online. A size 16 or 18 sounds amazing most days!
Go see an orthopedic dr to get a new orthotic for my left foot so I walk more evenly and don't continue to screw my body up more than it already is (I have Cerebral Palsy so my right side is significantly bigger/longer than my left). Quit snacking when I'm not hungry. I'm going to try to drink water instead. I looked into intuitive eating. It's just about loving yourself and taking care of the body you have. I can get behind that.
I was going to post something, but I see it is already sort of being talked about. I started in Nov just walking on an incline. I feel like people are giving me crap because I am not doing a full sweaty work out (my DH). I have expressed to them that I want to do something wearing whatever I am wearing, and in whatever shoes as long as they are walkable. It seems to them and a bit to me, to be not good enough. Like I should be trying to lose weight, and of course I have weight I could lose, cant we all, but that wasn't the point. The point is for it to be sustainable, for it to be sooo easy that I can't sit there and talk myself out of it, for me to go as I am instead of needing a whole wardrobe change. The point was to be strong and to have less cellulite. And honestly, I am stronger and I have less cellulite and that looks so much better. But there is a part of me that is disappointed that I am not losing weight and disappointed that I am not losing inches, although part of me suspects that I might be losing inches because it feels slightly less love handles, but it is so slow. Part of me is disappointed it is slow, like 2 months of this has resulted in not much, but that is also the point. It's hard to wrap my head around it, but the point is if I diet and exercise I will eventually stop dieting and exercising. But if I just try to eat slightly healthier and walk a little bit I can do that forever, right?
This has always been a point of contention with me and DH- he loves to run and do cardio heavy things while I like pilates, yoga, dance, and lifting. We have now struck a balance on what "working out" means to us, but I did struggle with the feelings of judgement that I thought that I was getting from him and those around me. I still do sometimes. But I've learned what movement I like to do, so now I'm working on how often I like to do it without it taking over my whole life.
The gym I started at a few weeks ago makes you sign up for each class at least one hour in advance. I am used to going to the gym entirely on my own schedule/motivation and making a formal commitment on my schedule has really helped me with consistency so far, along the lines of what ESF suggested. This week was challenging, though, because the gym closed on Tuesday due to snow when I had planned to go. Even that blip somehow made it harder to drag myself there when my next planned workout (yesterday) came around.
I'm trying to be mindful to kind of mentally bask in how good it feels afterwards, and remind myself of that when I am feeling blah about going.
Ok, well, it’s only been a week, but so far having a goal for what I’m doing at the gym is really helping. I went Tuesday through Thursday and we skied today. I’m not ready to say I’m totally committed yet, but I feel pretty good about this.
Swimming starts back up tomorrow morning. I could go by myself, but I’ve found I’m more likely to go if it’s a “class.” This is just a coached session, and out new coach is a 20-something who works us like we are twice his age (we might be). The old coach, well, this was his retirement job, and he didn’t take it easy on us. Anyway, I love it.
Post by seeyalater52 on Jan 10, 2020 20:24:47 GMT -5
I made it to barre 3x this week which was my goal. First time I’ve been able to since I was off work for the holidays (barre studio is right across from work which is convenient when I’m working but an hour+ away from where I live.) Class was SUPER triggering today and I stuck it out and did great anyways and felt really good afterwards so I’m proud.
Post by secretlyevil on Jan 11, 2020 9:55:16 GMT -5
I ran my longest run in nearly two years today. I didn’t break any speed records but I didn’t care either. Mentally I was over the moon when I finished my 4.25 mile run.
Thanks to this thread and talk of walking (my preferred movement these days), I went out and got in a nice 2m walk yesterday instead of wasting time doing nothing. So thanks.
Also, today it's going to be 69* so H and I are going on a hike. Yay.