Mine- I took today off so I could review my resume and apply for the job in Phoenix. It’s done. Now I’m a nervous wreck again. And DH is freaking out about how expensive homes and private schools are. So we sat down today with Redfin and within 5 minutes saw 2 beautiful homes that were within what we wanted to spend that had a separate space for MiL. So he’s calming the heck down.
I have a director level presentation in an hour. And a client meeting at one. So obviously, I dressed up, but then I realized it was supposed to rain, so suede boots were out and I switched outfits in a rush. Got to work and realized I'm wearing a black bra under a white sweater. I am thankfully wearing a nude camisole, so it's mostly concealed, but if it's not sitting juuuuuust so, I look quite suspect. Way to feel confident.
DH and I are hoping to look at a beach house tomorrow. We’ve wanted this forever and it finally feels within our reach.
The consulting gig I picked up is shaping up to be bigger than I thought. So that’s exciting.
DH found a series of youtube videos that a dr put out about kids with ADHD and impulsivity, emotions, and how it’s effect on every aspect of life. And OMG its like he’s been in our house following DD1 around. But I haven’t found any suggestions for resolutions - just explanations for outbursts or her inability to hang up her coat even though I’ve asked her to do it 90 times. But it’s a step in the right direction toward me understanding her, and that’s pretty awesome.
ETA: my biggest concern is the social impact. It’s clear she has trouble making and keeping friends. I’ve tried to coach her and all of the tips I’ve read about haven’t worked. I’m hoping we can figure it out.
The teenage years on going to be the death of me. In one room is DD, crying because she has no friends at school. She has made a lot of friends, but no really close friends. Plus all new classes after school, so all of the friends she made last semester are scattered. In her private school, they switched classes, but were still in the same group. She is so timid, I just wish she would come out of her shell. She won't invite anyone over. And with everyone playing some type of travel sport all year long, they don't have much free time outside of school.
In the next room, I hear DS talking on the phone. This girl has been hung up on him all year. It sounds like she's yelling. He's just yeah, yeah. I asked what did she want, nothing. Why did she call, I don't know I wasn't listening. He said I don't know how she got my number. Then said she hadn't texted me in months. Hmmmm… That's not adding up, but he is being very evasive. I have talked to him about girls that may be willing to do things, that will tie you to them the rest of your life. I also need to ask if there have been any inappropriate pictures sent, since it is illegal to have on any phone. This girl has been very aggressive and can't seem to take the hint, unless he is leading her on.
rere - I am dreading those years. I’m sorry your DD is sad.
DD1 told me that all of the girls in her class/grade are doing an act for the talent show. She asked to join and they told her no. So I went to their teacher, the teacher running the show, and the principal to tell the that DD1 was purposely excluded. They basically said, “gee, sorry”, and are allowing the kids to do the act.
So what do I do with that? Tell their parents? Go back to the administration? Leave it alone and be super vocal if any parents ask me why she didn’t participate?
mae0111- is she medicated? I wish we lived close together. A mom of one if DS’s kinder friends is a pediatrician who spends a ton of time treating and lecturing on ADHD, depression, anxiety, and eating disorders in kids and adolescents. She’s flipping brilliant. She also has ADHD herself and has an older son who has a whole lot of issues. She wasn’t diagnosed until college, and she recently said, “Can you succeed without treatment? Yes, I did. Did it come at an incredible price? Yes, it did and does.”
mommyatty - she is being medicated and it has made a difference, but I think she’s starting to hit puberty and she’s had a growth spurt since starting, so I’m wondering if we need to up the dose. The NP said it could become ineffective over time, especially with growth.
I can’t seem to find anyone super knowledgeable about it around here, which is discouraging as we have some of the top-rated hospitals in the country within 15 miles.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Jan 16, 2020 17:25:36 GMT -5
on the overnight camp saga, I've got us narrowed down to two camps. One is an independent, been around forever, semi religious camp. One is a YMCA camp (so also semi religious).
I'm having a hard time deciding between the two just because we have a friend (DS' best friend who is a girl) going to the independent camp. The YMCA camp seems to possibly have better program offerings and be a little more organized.
I think DS' friend who like him to go to that camp but it's definitely not mandatory. DS seems interested in the programs at the other camp. But I think he'd enjoy both programs so it's hard to really know. Equal in cost and affordable but not cheap, which is probably right where we want to be. The YMCA camp has a family camp weekend we can go on to check the camp out, but the independent camp doesn't.
mustardseed2007 I know we’re in different locations, but we’ve always had great experiences with the YMCA in our area. So far we’ve only done day summer and school break camps, but DH and DD also do overnight weekend camping trips through the Y and they’re great.
Post by traveltheworld on Jan 16, 2020 17:55:45 GMT -5
DS went for an observation day at the gifted school and had a great time. The principal and both of the teachers he spent time with recommended a grade skip. Everything I've ever read said that grade skipping is hard for the kid, socially. It also doesn't help that DS is very small for his age; so if he skips a grade, that'll be even worst.
All of that may not even matter as DS doesn't want to leave his current school as he doesn't want to leave his friends. Not sure why he didn't mention that before we made all the effort of organizing the observation day. On one hand, I feel like if he's happy, we should just leave him be. On the other hand, I'm worried that he'd miss out on living up to his full potential. The principal and the teachers are so excited about him - it was such a refreshing change.
Post by erinshelley21 on Jan 16, 2020 19:56:06 GMT -5
mae0111 my niece's ADHD symptoms leveled out once she started her period. Hopefully your DD will do the same. I'm sorry she is having a hard time with friends though. I hope she finds her people soon.
Post by erinshelley21 on Jan 16, 2020 20:02:11 GMT -5
I'm starting to find my groove for work again now that I have the privacy of my own office in my own house. It helps that DH went back to work. Its been a good week.
The plumber came to fix the big mistake he made over the summer. He didn't breathe a word of there being a bill and I hope one doesn't show up. I dont want to be mean.
Despite all the surprise issues last weekend, I managed to get quite a bit done with unpacking and organizing. I'm feeling A LITTLE better about the state of the house.
mustardseed2007, I worked at a YMCA summer camp day camp. It was inner city DC, so I don’t think comparable at all to your program. But from a religious standpoint there was basically nothing religious wise in our program.
on the overnight camp saga, I've got us narrowed down to two camps. One is an independent, been around forever, semi religious camp. One is a YMCA camp (so also semi religious).
I'm having a hard time deciding between the two just because we have a friend (DS' best friend who is a girl) going to the independent camp. The YMCA camp seems to possibly have better program offerings and be a little more organized.
I think DS' friend who like him to go to that camp but it's definitely not mandatory. DS seems interested in the programs at the other camp. But I think he'd enjoy both programs so it's hard to really know. Equal in cost and affordable but not cheap, which is probably right where we want to be. The YMCA camp has a family camp weekend we can go on to check the camp out, but the independent camp doesn't.
Meh. What a pain.
DD went to YMCA sleepaway camp last summer. We are also not religious and DD has had zero exposure to church, Bible stories, etc. Evidently they did some light discussions referencing Bible stories during their evening “vespers” time (character development). DD didn’t understand any of the references and said that was her least favorite part of the day (“listening to stories about dead people”) but otherwise it wasn’t enough to make me reconsider sending her back. She’s going again this year.
So this is fun. I just saw the tentative interview schedule for the job I applied for. (This company doesn’t jack around... I applied at 9:30, had a request for dates I could be in Phoenix by lunch, replies to them about 2:00, and had a tentative date set before 6:00.) I’m interviewing with 13 people. Including the GC and Deputy GC. And including a lawyer I interviewed and didn’t hire because my boss wanted someone he already knew. So that’s not the least bit awkward. FML.
So this is fun. I just saw the tentative interview schedule for the job I applied for. (This company doesn’t jack around... I applied at 9:30, had a request for dates I could be in Phoenix by lunch, replies to them about 2:00, and had a tentative date set before 6:00.) I’m interviewing with 13 people. Including the GC and Deputy GC. And including a lawyer I interviewed and didn’t hire because my boss wanted someone he already knew. So that’s not the least bit awkward. FML.
Are they scheduling multiple segments? I think it's a really good sign that they want you to meet that many people - it means they are very serious about you. When I interviewed with my current company, I did the initial 3 rounds (recruiter, recruiter + GC, GC + HR), then they flew me to headquarters and I did a full 7 hour day with more than 20 people, including the entire legal team, SVPs of every asset class, and a quick one with the CEO.
So this is fun. I just saw the tentative interview schedule for the job I applied for. (This company doesn’t jack around... I applied at 9:30, had a request for dates I could be in Phoenix by lunch, replies to them about 2:00, and had a tentative date set before 6:00.) I’m interviewing with 13 people. Including the GC and Deputy GC. And including a lawyer I interviewed and didn’t hire because my boss wanted someone he already knew. So that’s not the least bit awkward. FML.
Just smile and be warm. I don't know how I'd handle that either but I'm about to be in the same boat. I wanted to hire someone, wasn't able to hire them because one of the owners wanted someone different, and yesterday I was informed about someone they all know, and I know they expect that person to be hired (and he will be). "Oh yeah, Bill's son!"
traveltheworld- they aren’t using an outside recruiter. So first I talked to their HR. Then to the VP. Now it’s an interview with multiple groups of people. Like the two other attorneys in this group, and the GC and DGC together. I don’t know if they will want a Round 2 with anyone higher. I kind of doubt it. That’s a long day of interviews. Like 5.5 hours.
And man, I looked today at my total comp. I make a LOT of money. But I’m not sure how to do the calculation since over half is made up of bonus. And our company the past few years has been low on payout. Like our payouts have been around 80% of target value. I’m struggling with what would be the middle ground between not selling myself short and not scaring the holy living shit out of them.
I got the promotion!!! And they gave me a promotion bonus big enough for me to pay off my final student loan. I am in shock over that part. I literally had no idea that was a thing and never even imagined getting a bonus. I am on the verge of tears over being able to wipe out that debt. It's going to mean I don't have to live paycheck to paycheck anymore. My monthly budget will have actual buffer that I can put into savings. I had just finished telling my boss that one of my personal goals for this year is to pay that down faster but I didn't think it would be possible and he was all "oh, I'm sure you can do it, don't stress about that." Then bam. Giant random check at the end of the review. Unreal.
mommyatty, chances are they already have a salary band that they have to work with. I'd fight for a bigger signing bonus and special grants to compensate for any long term incentive plan stuff that you'd be giving up. But I feel you on the bonus front. On one hand, it's hard to give up that amount of money, but on the other hand, payouts are never guaranteed on those.
I got the promotion!!! And they gave me a promotion bonus big enough for me to pay off my final student loan. I am in shock over that part. I literally had no idea that was a thing and never even imagined getting a bonus. I am on the verge of tears over being able to wipe out that debt. It's going to mean I don't have to live paycheck to paycheck anymore. My monthly budget will have actual buffer that I can put into savings. I had just finished telling my boss that one of my personal goals for this year is to pay that down faster but I didn't think it would be possible and he was all "oh, I'm sure you can do it, don't stress about that." Then bam. Giant random check at the end of the review. Unreal.
I'm so happy for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You earned it, and deserve it! Way to go!!!!!!!!!!!!