Like others, I was really surprised and saddened to hear this. I guess what I can't see is why after 27 years did they decide to call it quits? I guess we will never know and nor should we because it's not our business.
I do hope they run the foundation together - mostly because I worry about the fraud and scammers that started after MacKenzie Scott started with her philanthropy efforts in earnest.
I assumed they just got tired of each other. I feel like you see that sometimes with empty nesters. He strikes me as the type who wouldn’t keep up pretenses if the kids had moved on and they were already living separately.
Whatever their couple status, I hope their foundation is able to keep up the attention and investment on the climate crisis. We need all the help there we can get.
I’m surprised that people are surprised. I’ve never watched one interview or documentary of them without thinking — OMG, he would be a total nightmare as a husband. She gave up using all her own brilliance for a pretty nice chunk of time so she could take on all the family life burden while he did crap like go off to a cabin for a month to read books. I would have freaking murdered him — no matter how much outsourcing I could afford. I’m glad with the foundation that she got back to being able to use her brilliance, but I’m sure she is still the one who has to be like “DO NOT FORGET OUR KID GRADUATES COLLEGE NEXT WEEK.”
My sense is they have tremendous respect and admiration for each other. I hope this remains the case and they can continue to run an amazing foundation.
But I can totally see with their children essentially launched that they were ready to not be married.
Like others, I was really surprised and saddened to hear this. I guess what I can't see is why after 27 years did they decide to call it quits? I guess we will never know and nor should we because it's not our business.
I do hope they run the foundation together - mostly because I worry about the fraud and scammers that started after MacKenzie Scott started with her philanthropy efforts in earnest.
I do think both of them have been very hands on with their foundation and I assume they will both continue to handle it with similar procedures. I think with MacKenzie Scott, she was giving out grants in a much more sporadic and informal way and to organizations that she had no previous involvement with. So hopefully the fraud won't be as much of an issue.
It is crazy to think of the amount of wealth and power they have, though [way too much, though to their credit I think they have at least tried to use it responsibly]. So it is concerning to think of the possible destabilizing effects of the divorce.
It's just an unfathomable amount of money. How does this even happen? <- that is a rhetorical question.
Yday at dinner MH and I were marveling that Gates is only the third richest human on the planet. So we started looking at the list. And true to what we know already, the majority of the list was old(er), white men.
Seriously. Just the fact they had to “calm global markets” - for something as basic/normal as a divorce - shows they have to much money/power - regardless of how much good they do with it.
I’m surprised that people are surprised. I’ve never watched one interview or documentary of them without thinking — OMG, he would be a total nightmare as a husband. She gave up using all her own brilliance for a pretty nice chunk of time so she could take on all the family life burden while he did crap like go off to a cabin for a month to read books. I would have freaking murdered him — no matter how much outsourcing I could afford. I’m glad with the foundation that she got back to being able to use her brilliance, but I’m sure she is still the one who has to be like “DO NOT FORGET OUR KID GRADUATES COLLEGE NEXT WEEK.”
My sense is they have tremendous respect and admiration for each other. I hope this remains the case and they can continue to run an amazing foundation.
But I can totally see with their children essentially launched that they were ready to not be married.
I think he seemed like a nightmare to be married to but after 20+ years I sort of assumed that it worked for her!
he goes on a yearly vacation with an ex girlfriend among other tidbits
I was surprised by the news only because I thought they were already split, but still working together. I think there have been rumors of a somewhat mutual open marriage agreement among the Microsoft friends and family I knew who worked there for decades (several are now retired boomers). But one article I just read said Melinda wrote a book last year that was very flattering to their marriage... so who knows. Rich people often have very different marriages that maybe are unique arrangements, but I can’t imagine that they still don’t want to be supported and have love beyond both being passionate about shared philanthropy work together.
IMO it’s quite possible that an open-ish marriage worked and helped them coparent and now that the kids aren’t as much of a concern they’d rather do their own thing.
I’m surprised that people are surprised. I’ve never watched one interview or documentary of them without thinking — OMG, he would be a total nightmare as a husband. She gave up using all her own brilliance for a pretty nice chunk of time so she could take on all the family life burden while he did crap like go off to a cabin for a month to read books. I would have freaking murdered him — no matter how much outsourcing I could afford. I’m glad with the foundation that she got back to being able to use her brilliance, but I’m sure she is still the one who has to be like “DO NOT FORGET OUR KID GRADUATES COLLEGE NEXT WEEK.”
My sense is they have tremendous respect and admiration for each other. I hope this remains the case and they can continue to run an amazing foundation.
But I can totally see with their children essentially launched that they were ready to not be married.
I think he seemed like a nightmare to be married to but after 20+ years I sort of assumed that it worked for her!
I think we are seeing more and more divorces of people in their 50s and 60s, because women hold it together long enough for kids to launch and then are like “F this.” I assume it is happening more in upper middle class and rich people, because they can afford to do so. I mean all these smart women born in the 60s were on the cutting edge of a wave of feminism that pushed them into the workforce. They raised kids in the 80s and 90s where they either tried to do it all or leaned out — in many cases while their husband changed not one damn thing. And now, they are like “hey, I’m going to live in my own space and do whatever the hell I want to do.”
And I realize that all studies show that women all still having to do it all, but I do think men are somewhat more accountable. I keep telling my husband that I don’t understand how golf courses are surviving. In the 80s, almost every man I knew spent 8 hours most Saturdays playing golf. I don’t see that at all in the dads I now know in their 30s and 40s and even 50s. Instead, they are ferrying kids around to soccer, baseball, etc.
I think he seemed like a nightmare to be married to but after 20+ years I sort of assumed that it worked for her!
I think we are seeing more and more divorces of people in their 50s and 60s, because women hold it together long enough for kids to launch and then are like “F this.” I assume it is happening more in upper middle class and rich people, because they can afford to do so. I mean all these smart women born in the 60s were on the cutting edge of a wave of feminism that pushed them into the workforce. They raised kids in the 80s and 90s where they either tried to do it all or leaned out — in many cases while their husband changed not one damn thing. And now, they are like “hey, I’m going to live in my own space and do whatever the hell I want to do.”
And I realize that all studies show that women all still having to do it all, but I do think men are somewhat more accountable. I keep telling my husband that I don’t understand how golf courses are surviving. In the 80s, almost every man I knew spent 8 hours most Saturdays playing golf. I don’t see that at all in the dads I now know in their 30s and 40s and even 50s. Instead, they are ferrying kids around to soccer, baseball, etc.
There's a book called "The Female Brain" by Louann Brizendine, who is a neuropsychiatrist, wherein she explains the hormonal changes in the female brain from fetushood (not a word) through menopause. Basically, from puberty until menopause females have a chemical process in the brain that drives us to care for others and put others first. Then we hit menopause a switch flips and we're like "F this I'm going to do what I want to do". I think about that a lot when I hear of women who divorce in their 50s-60s, or start new businesses or philanthropic efforts.
1. Down with billionaires 2. Up with hilarious divorce memes 3. I hope Melinda and MacKenzie live their best fuck it lives. I give nary a care for Bill or Jeff.
When I was in HS taking a psychology/human development class I remember reading some article about how it’s very common for couples to divorce when their kids go off to college and they realize they are no longer connected without their kids.
I thought to myself - I bet that will be my parents. Sure enough after my senior year of HS they divorced.
I think this is very common. We just don’t see it on such a public level.
I can’t read this, but is the premise that common knowledge, kids, and money make marriages work? That seems pretty petty... I mean more more stress (financial, family, work, communication, etc) makes it harder, but who really cares if rich people divorce at the same rate as lower socio-economic people?!
I think he seemed like a nightmare to be married to but after 20+ years I sort of assumed that it worked for her!
And I realize that all studies show that women all still having to do it all, but I do think men are somewhat more accountable. I keep telling my husband that I don’t understand how golf courses are surviving. In the 80s, almost every man I knew spent 8 hours most Saturdays playing golf. I don’t see that at all in the dads I now know in their 30s and 40s and even 50s. Instead, they are ferrying kids around to soccer, baseball, etc.
Off topic, related to golf. In the 2008 recession, the market was saturated with too many golf courses and many closed or were sold. Many sold to hotel chains /resorts as an amenity, like the pool, not necessarily a money making venture on its own, even if the location was further away from the hotel. The biggest cost / challenge is the need for a lot of water.
It was always popular with retirees since it’s a sport you can play when you are 90, but a lot more women retirees play now than they used to. I questioned how the industry would last after the boomer generation passes on, but since Covid there’s been a huge resurgence in the popularity of golf, since even the strictest states deemed it a safe outdoor activity with masks. WFH people have more availability to take off early and play, and this may have introduced a whole new generation of people to the sport. @although the birth rate has gone down, I think it’s primarily men who have started playing golf during the pandemic.
I can’t read this, but is the premise that common knowledge, kids, and money make marriages work? That seems pretty petty... I mean more more stress (financial, family, work, communication, etc) makes it harder, but who really cares if rich people divorce at the same rate as lower socio-economic people?!
I had the same reaction you did when I read the subheading. But it turned out that wasn’t really the point of the article. Instead, it discussed the fact that their children had grown, which possibly forced them to assess their marriage and decide if it was going to continue working for them. It also mentioned how much therapy they’d had, and how money wouldn’t have been the stressor that it is for many couples.
All that could be true, still, nobody ever thought of them as “the ideal couple,” did they? I’d be much more shocked if the Obamas got divorced, as an example, since they’ve been much more open about their strengths and weaknesses over the years.
I can’t read this, but is the premise that common knowledge, kids, and money make marriages work? That seems pretty petty... I mean more more stress (financial, family, work, communication, etc) makes it harder, but who really cares if rich people divorce at the same rate as lower socio-economic people?!
All that could be true, still, nobody ever thought of them as “the ideal couple,” did they? I’d be much more shocked if the Obamas got divorced, as an example, since they’ve been much more open about their strengths and weaknesses over the years.
No, but I'm always surprised when marriages that long end... It sort of seems like once you hit 20-25 years, you're sort of in it for the long haul.
All that could be true, still, nobody ever thought of them as “the ideal couple,” did they? I’d be much more shocked if the Obamas got divorced, as an example, since they’ve been much more open about their strengths and weaknesses over the years.
No, but I'm always surprised when marriages that long end... It sort of seems like once you hit 20-25 years, you're sort of in it for the long haul.
I agree with you, it’s always surprising, from the outside. I also agree with the people saying that in your 50s, you’re kind of reassessing everything and asking, “Is this really how I want the rest of my life to be?”
I mean, if he was hanging out with Epstein after she told him all of the reasons it was a bad idea, then I completely get her desire to divorce him. No matter the age of their kids or how long they had been married, he was seeking out contact with Epstein FFS.
All that could be true, still, nobody ever thought of them as “the ideal couple,” did they? I’d be much more shocked if the Obamas got divorced, as an example, since they’ve been much more open about their strengths and weaknesses over the years.
No, but I'm always surprised when marriages that long end... It sort of seems like once you hit 20-25 years, you're sort of in it for the long haul.
i think this assumes that if you’ve put up with something for a long time, you no longer care. I just don’t think life works that way.
For many, divorce is expensive and two households cost more than one. If you are 60 and stuck it out this long, all your assets are likely tied up together. You likely have saved enough for a joint retirement, if that. Getting a later in life divorce means a steep increase in costs at a time when you are unlikely to recoup that added expense in the job market. So for many people it isn’t ‘Eh. I guess I can deal with that for another twenty years.’ It’s:‘if we divorce I’ll have to choose between rent, medicine and food. I can’t stand him but I hate the idea of eating cat food more.’
The Gates don’t have that problem. Yes, they could choose to live separate but technically married lives. Or they can just get a divorce, live well, and drop the pretense. Both are choices unavailable to many.
All that could be true, still, nobody ever thought of them as “the ideal couple,” did they? I’d be much more shocked if the Obamas got divorced, as an example, since they’ve been much more open about their strengths and weaknesses over the years.
No, but I'm always surprised when marriages that long end... It sort of seems like once you hit 20-25 years, you're sort of in it for the long haul.
my parents divorced after 21 years of marriage - my mom couldn’t live w my dad’s decade long affair and he couldn’t handle the 4 college educations that were on the horizon. Thankfully they were young enough (41 and 42) where they still had plenty of time to rebuild their retirement accounts but the day to day financial impacts were pretty big as 2 households are far more expensive to maintain than one. They BOTH couldn’t be in it for the ‘long haul’. Given that Bill was associated with Epstein, I think Melinda hit her enough spot regardless of how long they had been together. A woman like her doesn’t resign herself to the fact that it’s ok for her husband to be associated with a known pedophile and hangs in there bc they’ve been married for 2 decades. No they cut their losses and divorce.