Post by Leeham Rimes on Mar 24, 2022 8:21:15 GMT -5
a lot of this well meaning and good advice is hard bc legally, it’s not as simple as “it’s in their best interest for family to handle all finances”. As true as that is, the elder is still an adult and unless the elder agrees to restrictions for their own benefit, you have to go through legal hoops and channels. Even with a poa, it depends on its language within the document An adult has the legal right to make shit financial decisions, make shit health decisions, etc. when my mother and I went for consultations and understanding what right we had under the POA, in regards to my father, it was really mind blowing to be told “even if he has only a small handful of lucid moments, that’s enough in the eyes of the courts”. And when siblings disagree that creates additional problems and expenses to an already expensive situation. Many attorneys in my area won’t even take elder guardianship cases ( we found 2 in our area) bc they’re almost impossible to win and if you do stand a chance, it will prohibitively expensive.
This is why I think, even if only you go OP, you need to see an attorney.b and give them the poa for review. They’ll have much better and more accurate advice than anyone else ever could.
Last Edit: Mar 24, 2022 8:22:09 GMT -5 by Leeham Rimes
I need ham like water Like breath, like rain I need ham like mercy From Heaven's gate Sometimes ham salad or casserole or ham that’s free range, all natural I need ham
We are already using the LTC policy for the home care. We pay, they reimburse. They’ve told us they don’t anticipate it being any different in an assisted living facility (we were shooting for that before my mom threw a stink and oldest sister sided with her) before we pivoted to at home care. I have spent many hours reading the contract and on the phone with them.
Assisted living is a very broad term and many places that specialize in memory care have graduated levels of assistance and intervention based on the client's needs. So it may very well be a good option for your mom.
You should consult an attorney for review of the POA to determine its parameters and whether the holder of the POA is fulfilling their duties. None of us can tell you that. In my case when I had POA for my mom, I held all control of my mother's finances for 7 years, starting at the time when she'd still have periods of lucidity but couldn't manage activities of daily living.
Post by minniemouse on Mar 24, 2022 13:13:39 GMT -5
I don't have any advice on these specific issues, but we did just have to go to court to get guardianship over my father due to a dementia diagnosis. If you have questions on that process let me know. It's hard because my dad is really good at masking, so he appears fine when he's not. He would absolutely be taken advantage of if a sales person came to the door, for example, so we are going to freeze his credit and give him a limited debit card. We (the guardian- my sister) is allowed to do this per the order. The order spells out exactly what she can and cannot do, and what things need specific court approval. My mom is the caregiver, for now. I will remember this post if/when we have to hire someone. It would be nice if they gave a heads up anytime they notice something odd. I'm sure they also want to respect the elderly person's privacy as well.