Post by icedcoffee on Sept 28, 2023 12:56:39 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for your loss. She sounds like a great Aunt to take on the grandma roll like that. Sending you positive thoughts as you and your uncle navigate this.
I’m so sorry but glad you had her as long as you did. One of my aunts died unexpectedly earlier this year too. We didn’t have exactly the relationship you describe but I was the point person for everything that followed and it was a lot to shoulder while also missing her. Hugs.
Post by fivechickens on Sept 28, 2023 16:51:23 GMT -5
Thank you everyone for the well wishes. I appreciate it.
mcppalmbeach OMGosh you explained the relationship perfectly. I am sure I annoyed my aunt sometimes but it was much less complicated than mom-daughter dynamic.
meganew they are 12. When their grandpa died 3 years ago I got them the red string book (I can’t remember what it was called) and they found comfort in that. They had a special bond with my aunt (they called Mimi) so I will look into that book for them. Thank you.
Depending on your kids’ comfort level, maybe involve them in the funeral planning. Designing a photo slideshow, helping figure out the menu for the reception, passing out flowers, whatever. My aunt was not religious at the end of her life so I did not do a mass or involve a priest. It left the funeral home director scratching his head a little and required the full capacity of my Girl Scout co-leader skills but I “designed” the funeral. My aunt had been a day care provider her whole career so my girls and nephew all had a part - the nine year old read a poem (Remember Me by Margaret Mead), the then eleven year old was a little less comfortable so I had her lead a moment of silence, the eight year old played a beautiful song on his guitar. Other closer relatives sang or spoke and then we opened the floor and about a dozen people shared memories. I loved that the kids were able to participate in their own ways and was proud that they did so appropriate to the weight of the occasion. I think it helped them absorb what had happened and realize that even as “just” kids they have a role to play in the life cycle of our family. A few of the old guard cousins who had been to many a Catholic service pulled me aside and said it was the best funeral they had ever attended. Most importantly, I think my aunt would have loved it. ❤️