I'm starting to worry about having another baby

[Deleted]

Not because of all the stress that comes along with having a baby and a 1.5 year old baby at the same time, but because of our financial situation. I'm starting to worry if we were irresponsible. And I'm stressing.

The problem is, it actually makes the most sense for us to get I out of the way now, because I won't be able to go back to school or work full time until they are in school or preschool. I don't have family that can babysit more than once in awhile, and we can't afford daycare. So that is why I SAH. That and, I have a hard time leaving him anyway because I'm kind of controlling and overprotective. I was working on my husbands two days off, but I had a far commute and there was never time to get anything done around the house because it was just us by ourselves with the baby while the other one was at work, and we never got a break and were so tired. I didn't make that much after the commute, so I stopped working.

We figured that if I stopped working and we had those two days off together, we could focus more on our budget, have time to actually go grocery shopping and meal plan, and I'd save the money on gas so it would even out. Well, it's a little harder than I thought, money is still super tight and all I can think of is how are we going to afford more when the other baby is here? More diapers more formula more baby food? I planned to Bf but I could not produce no matter what I did. I hope that I have more next time and can save on the cost of formula.

[Deleted]

Ugh it posted before I was done!

Anyway, I also feel like I need to cloth diaper and make our own baby food, because we just won't be able to afford it. But I don't know where to start.

I am just stressed and want to enjoy my pregnancy but I can't help but think of the money part.

[eav2c]

Breathe! It will be okay.

First things first, you have 9 (well, 8?) months to prepare, plan, and budget accordingly. I know it's hard to stick to a plan (we are totally struggling here too), but you have time on your side (well, some) to figure out how you guys will be able to afford 2. It might seem daunting right now and surely there will be difficult times ahead, but I think it will come together. Perhaps not as gracefully as you would like, but, you're making it with one and I'm sure you'll make it with two just fine.

[Deleted]

You will enjoy it and everything will work out. I have the mentality that everything happens for a reason.

You are so talented. You could do some stuff on the side? I do and I bring Wy with me. We use the side money for groceries, gas, ect.

[eav2c]

Jan 12, 2013 22:38:56 GMT -5 jnoellee said:

Ugh it posted before I was done!

Anyway, I also feel like I need to cloth diaper and make our own baby food, because we just won't be able to afford it. But I don't know where to start.

I am just stressed and want to enjoy my pregnancy but I can't help but think of the money part.

I don't know anything about CD but in terms of making your own baby food it's pretty easy and simple. I also find it to be a lot of fun and not stressful at all. C eats some homemade and some store bought (he's picky about some of the food I make :-( ) but I didn't start thinking about making his food till it was time. You probably have all the tools you need to make some food already. I thought there was a lot required but there really isn't and everything you might need (with the exception of the actual food and a blender/food processor) can be purchased at the dollar store (such as ice trays). I bought the ninja chop at Target for like $15 on sale.

[Deleted]

Thanks guys. I'm just so stressed and feel like a total bitch cause I seriously freaked out on my husband for spending 30$ at the grocery store for, a large thing of salsa, a huge pack of soda(only he drinks it) a huge thing of mayo, and a huge thing of cat food. I was so mad because we didn't need the huge sizes of those! I feel like I'm trying to plan and make it work and he's just blowing dough on huge things soda and mayo!! Lol

I just didn't expect for it to be this hard already. Maybe we just need some adjusting time.

We get out tax return soon so we can supplement with that for a while, but I wanted to use it on a king size bed! Ugh

We rent a house that his mom owns. We still pay almost full price though.

[Deleted]

Jan 12, 2013 22:44:21 GMT -5 @pcloadletter said:

Look into WIC for help with groceries?

we never qualified for it before, but now that we are considered a family of 4 we might? I'll google it. I'm on my husbands crappy insurance that we pay 400 dollars a month for and still have 35 dollar copays and it costs 2500 for the delivery. I'm trying to see if we qualify for medical to maybe help pick up the rest but don't know if they can be a secondary insurance. I have friends that have told me to cancel ours and apply and they will probably cover everything 100 percent but that scares me and I'm not sure how I feel about that.

[Deleted]

Jan 12, 2013 22:42:25 GMT -5 @smudgee said:

You will enjoy it and everything will work out. I have the mentality that everything happens for a reason.

You are so talented. You could do some stuff on the side? I do and I bring Wy with me. We use the side money for groceries, gas, ect.

you're so sweet. I just texted my friend and asked her. If u could just a day or two a month it would totally help.

[browneyedhunni85]

Everything will work out, trust me. I've pretty much been the bread winner for our family for the past two years. DH company went out of business and him finding a new job has been hell. The job market in GA sucks.

[Deleted]

Jan 12, 2013 22:45:34 GMT -5 eav2c said:

Jan 12, 2013 22:38:56 GMT -5 jnoellee said:

Ugh it posted before I was done!

Anyway, I also feel like I need to cloth diaper and make our own baby food, because we just won't be able to afford it. But I don't know where to start.

I am just stressed and want to enjoy my pregnancy but I can't help but think of the money part.

I don't know anything about CD but in terms of making your own baby food it's pretty easy and simple. I also find it to be a lot of fun and not stressful at all. C eats some homemade and some store bought (he's picky about some of the food I make ) but I didn't start thinking about making his food till it was time. You probably have all the tools you need to make some food already. I thought there was a lot required but there really isn't and everything you might need (with the exception of the actual food and a blender/food processor) can be purchased at the dollar store (such as ice trays). I bought the ninja chop at Target for like $15 on sale.

googling ninja chop.

[browneyedhunni85]

jnoelle I'm sending you a PM.

[lauranicole91]

Jan 12, 2013 22:44:21 GMT -5 @pcloadletter said:

Look into WIC for help with groceries?

I was going to suggest this. Maybe even food stamps? I know sometimes it sucks to be on government assistance, but when you need it, you need it. As long as you aren't committing fraud to get it. Ha.

What about couponing? Are you spending your money efficiently? Following sales and stores with lower prices?

Any other bills like cable, Internet, etc that can be cut back on? Every little bit helps right?

[eav2c]

Woah, $400 a month? is this through his job? That is insane (maybe I'm not "in touch" though). I thought we paid a lot. I don't know how insurance works but can you get a quote for insurance not through his work if that's how he gets it? When I had individual (not through my job) insurance it was $100/month through Aetna. Like I said, I am not in the know about insurance, but there has to be a better and more affordable option, right?

[sunshineluv]

Try to take one step at a time, and a baby is a blessing to your family, now or later. Don't stress yourself over the timing. Moneysavingmom.com is a good website for ideas on ways to save and ways to earn at home. The site is Christian based, but if that isn't your thing you could ignore those parts. I know she ran a post last week on did cloth diapers really save money, but I didn't read it since we use disposables. Meal planning and couponing can save you tons and if it is needed you will find the time, I tell myself this when I dream of quiting my job.

[eav2c]

Laura, are the ninja's still on sale at Target?

Jnoelle, when I looked on Amazon it was $40. I will send you mine when I am done with it if you can't find a cheap one. I don't think we will need it much longer (if at all anymore). It was best for getting it really fine when he first started eating. I hear a blender will also work but I'm not sure if as well.

[lauranicole91]

Jan 12, 2013 22:57:01 GMT -5 jnoellee said:

Jan 12, 2013 22:45:34 GMT -5 eav2c said:

I don't know anything about CD but in terms of making your own baby food it's pretty easy and simple. I also find it to be a lot of fun and not stressful at all. C eats some homemade and some store bought (he's picky about some of the food I make ) but I didn't start thinking about making his food till it was time. You probably have all the tools you need to make some food already. I thought there was a lot required but there really isn't and everything you might need (with the exception of the actual food and a blender/food processor) can be purchased at the dollar store (such as ice trays). I bought the ninja chop at Target for like $15 on sale.

googling ninja chop.

I love my ninja chopper!!! Best $15 I every spent!!

[lauranicole91]

Jan 12, 2013 23:01:55 GMT -5 eav2c said:

Laura, are the ninja's still on sale at Target?

Jnoelle, when I looked on Amazon it was $40. I will send you mine when I am done with it if you can't find a cheap one. I don't think we will need it much longer (if at all anymore). It was best for getting it really fine when he first started eating. I hear a blender will also work but I'm not sure if as well.

It's back to regular price: $20. Still pretty cheap.

[Deleted]

You guys can make it work! Look into reoccurring monthly fees. Cable tv is a huge rip off. Cell phone, land line, car payments, utility bills. Also look into cutting out soda, it keeps getting more expensive!

If you want to CD there are a few of us here that do. You can get diapers that will fit your LO right now and also your next one. Some are as cheap as $5 a piece, Alva brand. I love CDing and it is a pretty easy way to save money

[Deleted]

Jan 12, 2013 23:14:53 GMT -5 @lindy said:

You guys can make it work! Look into reoccurring monthly fees. Cable tv is a huge rip off. Cell phone, land line, car payments, utility bills. Also look into cutting out soda, it keeps getting more expensive!

If you want to CD there are a few of us here that do. You can get diapers that will fit your LO right now and also your next one. Some are as cheap as $5 a piece, Alva brand. I love CDing and it is a pretty easy way to save money

we are going to cancel our cable and only have Internet, but DH said it would still be about 40 dollars? We'd only be saving 50 dollars by cutting out cable, but we are still gonna do it. My h is addicted to Pepsi and gets terrible caffeine headaches when he doesn't have it. It's ridiculous. He doesn't like coffee. He also never gets cavities which I have no idea.

I just looked on wic and we are like 14 dollars away from making it. Err!!!

[Deleted]

Jan 12, 2013 22:59:16 GMT -5 eav2c said:

Woah, $400 a month? is this through his job? That is insane (maybe I'm not "in touch" though). I thought we paid a lot. I don't know how insurance works but can you get a quote for insurance not through his work if that's how he gets it? When I had individual (not through my job) insurance it was $100/month through Aetna. Like I said, I am not in the know about insurance, but there has to be a better and more affordable option, right?

yes, through his job. It's so stupid, It shouldn't be that expensive. It's for all three of us. I suck at figuring stuff out, I need to look into private insurance. I figured it would be worse for some reason.

[TrudyCampbell]

Don't worry. You will work everything out because you have to. It will be okay.

And don't stress because stress in pregnancy can give your kid the geigh. Didn't you know? Just ask Selfie.

[vthokie]

Jan 12, 2013 23:14:53 GMT -5 @lindy said:

You guys can make it work! Look into reoccurring monthly fees. Cable tv is a huge rip off. Cell phone, land line, car payments, utility bills. Also look into cutting out soda, it keeps getting more expensive!

If you want to CD there are a few of us here that do. You can get diapers that will fit your LO right now and also your next one. Some are as cheap as $5 a piece, Alva brand. I love CDing and it is a pretty easy way to save money

CDs could definitely start saving you money pretty quickly. I have a bunch of the Alvas and really like them. Kawaiis are also inexpensive ($9-10) and are really my favorites. I also use cheapo wash cloths as wipes. I feel like I have ZERO free time, but I can still manage a load of diapers every other day after work AND I make a few batches of baby food every couple weekends. You can totally do it. You have plenty of time to figure out a good budget and figure out what will work best for your family. Plus, you won't need a lot of the bigger things for baby #2 since you have them already. Deep breaths!

[biblionerd]

You'll find a way! I really did find the expenses THAT outlandish going from 1 to 2. I guess insurance did pay for her formula this year. We just cut corners as much as we could. We were in the same position really. I finished grad school while pg and didn't want to start a career just to stop. So I'm doing the kid thing before I go back. We switched to up and up diapers, make a lot of baby food, switched/cut back satellite, different phone plans, etc. You have plenty of time to figure it out!

[eav2c]

Jan 12, 2013 23:33:16 GMT -5 jnoellee said:

Jan 12, 2013 22:59:16 GMT -5 eav2c said:

Woah, $400 a month? is this through his job? That is insane (maybe I'm not "in touch" though). I thought we paid a lot. I don't know how insurance works but can you get a quote for insurance not through his work if that's how he gets it? When I had individual (not through my job) insurance it was $100/month through Aetna. Like I said, I am not in the know about insurance, but there has to be a better and more affordable option, right?

yes, through his job. It's so stupid, It shouldn't be that expensive. It's for all three of us. I suck at figuring stuff out, I need to look into private insurance. I figured it would be worse for some reason.

It might be. I don't know for sure. It also might vary from state to state? Like I said, I'm clueless on insurance but I thought $100 was reasonable and included dental/vision. However, it did NOT include pregnancy related stuff but I feel like it couldn't have been that much more expensive if it did. You could always call around and get quotes. It didn't take much work or time when I did it (3ish years ago). Is he obligated to use his works insurance?

[Deleted]

Jan 12, 2013 23:34:55 GMT -5 TrudyCampbell said:

Don't worry. You will work everything out because you have to. It will be okay.

And don't stress because stress in pregnancy can give your kid the geigh. Didn't you know? Just ask Selfie.

hehe, that selifie is so damn wise! But wait, I missed this one. Can u elaborate or link?

[Deleted]

Jan 12, 2013 23:01:13 GMT -5 @pcloadletter said:

And I would talk to your H about cutting out things that are not necessar, such as soda. You can very well live without it and it will give you some extra money a month. Also, don't eat out.

Yes, we are planning on not eating out now that I'm home and can do more meal planning and grocery shopping. It's way more expensive, (and not as healthy!) to eat out! He got the soda cause it was 5 dollars for a 24 pack, apparently a good deal, blah blah. At least it isn't beer or cigarettes!

[TrudyCampbell]

Jan 12, 2013 23:56:21 GMT -5 jnoellee said:

Jan 12, 2013 23:34:55 GMT -5 TrudyCampbell said:

Don't worry. You will work everything out because you have to. It will be okay.

And don't stress because stress in pregnancy can give your kid the geigh. Didn't you know? Just ask Selfie.

hehe, that selifie is so damn wise! But wait, I missed this one. Can u elaborate or link?

I'm going to post a new thread and see if the almighty gisa can deliver.

[lolaburns]

I don't want you to stress because that's not good for you. I know it is hard, though. For us, our grocery bill is the biggest expense per month besides our mortgage.

Once you get your budget sorted and make cuts where you can, look into couponing. It can be overwhelming at first but you will get the hang of it. Saving all the money at the register will give you a high! Between shopping the sale items and having coupons each month I can save anywhere from $200-$400 a month. That's a lot of money! I also meal plan in a way that I don't have to purchase a lot of ingredients or if I buy something to eat one night and there is extra I work it into a meal for another night so as not to waste it.


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[Deleted]

Jan 13, 2013 0:17:22 GMT -5 lolaburns said:

I don't want you to stress because that's not good for you. I know it is hard, though. For us, our grocery bill is the biggest expense per month besides our mortgage.

Once you get your budget sorted and make cuts where you can, look into couponing. It can be overwhelming at first but you will get the hang of it. Saving all the money at the register will give you a high! Between shopping the sale items and having coupons each month I can save anywhere from $200-$400 a month. That's a lot of money! I also meal plan in a way that I don't have to purchase a lot of ingredients or if I buy something to eat one night and there is extra I work it into a meal for another night so as not to waste it.


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I have looked up the couponing thing before on multiple websites to figure it out, and I do not get it!! I'm bad at math and confused easily. I really don't understand how to tell if a coupon doubles... Maybe you can help me. I'd love to get it down and get high at the register!!

[lolaburns]

Most grocery stores have double coupon days where they double the amount of a manufacturer or store coupon on that day. If you call or look on your store's website it usually tells you.

You can find coupons for most things you buy either through the mail/newspaper circulars or on the Internet. Most things go on sale in cycles at the store. For instance, I buy laundry detergent only about every two months because my grocery puts Arm&Hammer brand on sale and then makes it buy one get one free. Usually two will last me until it goes on sale again.


Wholesale clubs are also great but you have to be careful because sometimes certain things are actually more expensive.


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