It is cracking me up that nearly all the people in this thread with older kids are all, "eh, my kid eats that stuff now and then, too" while the moms with one baby are horrified. Been there, judged that. My oldest ate an awesome variety of healthy food and next to no junk for a good two years. He still eats a ton of fresh fruits and veggies and lots of good stuff, but he is far less willing to just eat the dinner leftovers for lunch than he once was.
I hope people were not watching me that closely at the mall today. I asked DS what he wanted for lunch and he said "ummmm, two cookies!" I told him he could pick what he wanted if he was good. He waited patiently while I bought shoes and shopped for makeup at Nordstrom and Sephora. You bet I bought him the two cookies. He ate them while I did some more shopping, then we went home and had our real lunch.
And I do judge. Smack your kid in Target - I'm judging. Scream at them and make them feel powerless - I judge. Food, clothing choice, discipline snippets of time I happen to witness - I don't judge.
Exactly! I judge people who are objectively bad parents--the abuse and neglect kind of stuff that would raise an eyebrow or two with CPS. Hit your kid in Walmart or leave them unattended in a car, and I will judge.
I no longer judge the mom who is trying her best, but lets her kid eat too much junk one day or watch too much TV the next (or uses cookies as a bribe so she can finally buying a freaking pair of shoes), the mom whose kid is throwing a fit in Target or crawling under the table while loudly saying something about his penis at a California Pizza Kitchen, or the mom whose kid is at the grocery store in swim trunks, a bike helmet, and one fireman boot. I have been that mom all too often so I just think "there but for the grace of God" and try to smile sympthetically.
I don't judge new moms for judging--I think everyone does it. But almost every mom I know becomes far less judgmental as time goes one.
DS1 is a picky eater. He basically willingly eats PB&J, pasta (no sauce!) with turkey meatballs, chicken nuggets, pizza (with no sauce! Weirdo), scrambed eggs, cheese sandwiches (only with muenster cheese. Weirdo), quesadillas, and steak. He will eat any fruit but only carrots and corn willingy (asparagus and green beans with persuasion). Lunch is not my hill to die on. I need it to be easy and quick most of the time. I will happily offer him those options, throw some fruit and baby carrots on the plate with it and be happy. I wouldn't have judged that mom a lick. What do YOU make our kids for lunch?
Post by thatgirl2478 on Jun 1, 2012 14:43:34 GMT -5
I'm in team 'meh' here. Not really judge worth IMHO. That was probably just 1/3 - 1/4 of the actual lunch provided - and even so it's not like her kids are going to die if they ate just those options until they were 5. I know lots of parents with picky eaters (thank god mine's not one) and sometimes you just learn to pick your battles.
My kid will not eat real food. He is SO ridiculously picky. I used to cook for him all the time and he would not eat anything. So I finally had to decide between making all of his food and starving him or letting him eat what he will eat - which for "main" foods is chicken nuggets, fish sticks, and turkey meatballs.
And yes, even when I have mixed homemade chicken nugget pieces in with frozen chicken nugget pieces, he picks out the homemade and won't eat it. Genius kid or just really high maintenance when it comes to eating? I'm going to pretend it's the first.
My DD is also super picky. When she was younger I also worked hard to make "real" food that was kid friendly, and she was actually losing weight because she fought me so hard. I do my best... at least I have her conditioned to eat whole wheat bread and tortillas. We have lots of sandwiches and quesadillas. I have to sneak veggies in smoothies, otherwise she would never eat any veggie other than the rare carrot stick.
I think a couple of my mom friends judge me for DD's diet, and I don't give a shit. The ones who are raising their eyebrows are the ones with one little baby who doesn't even eat food yet.
Meh. I fully admitted that judging is for entertainment purposes. I'm sure people judge me. The way people on here always claim that they fully support other mothers 100% of the time and never, ever think to themselves "Oh, but I do better" is also entertaining.
I will agree with this. The Nest (and most message boards I know) are always shocked when someone mentions they judge. Seriously, who doesn't judge?
I agree. I'm sick of the holier than thou "I don't judge" posts. Everyone judges. Own up to it so we can have some interesting discussions here.
I will agree with this. The Nest (and most message boards I know) are always shocked when someone mentions they judge. Seriously, who doesn't judge?
I agree. I'm sick of the holier than thou "I don't judge" posts. Everyone judges. Own up to it so we can have some interesting discussions here.
I don't think anyone is saying they don't judge anyone, any mom, etc... they are saying that this is not something judge-worthy... and offering up examples of why --- to show the OP that maybe she needs to chill out with the judging when she has so little info about the situation, etc.
And I do judge. Smack your kid in Target - I'm judging. Scream at them and make them feel powerless - I judge. Food, clothing choice, discipline snippets of time I happen to witness - I don't judge.
Exactly! I judge people who are objectively bad parents--the abuse and neglect kind of stuff that would raise an eyebrow or two with CPS. Hit your kid in Walmart or leave them unattended in a car, and I will judge.
I no longer judge the mom who is trying her best, but lets her kid eat too much junk one day or watch too much TV the next (or uses cookies as a bribe so she can finally buying a freaking pair of shoes), the mom whose kid is throwing a fit in Target or crawling under the table while loudly saying something about his penis at a California Pizza Kitchen, or the mom whose kid is at the grocery store in swim trunks, a bike helmet, and one fireman boot. I have been that mom all too often so I just think "there but for the grace of God" and try to smile sympthetically.
I don't judge new moms for judging--I think everyone does it. But almost every mom I know becomes far less judgmental as time goes one.
Totally agree! Hot dogs or mac and cheese for lunch is nothing.
It is cracking me up that nearly all the people in this thread with older kids are all, "eh, my kid eats that stuff now and then, too" while the moms with one baby are horrified. Been there, judged that. My oldest ate an awesome variety of healthy food and next to no junk for a good two years. He still eats a ton of fresh fruits and veggies and lots of good stuff, but he is far less willing to just eat the dinner leftovers for lunch than he once was.
I was just about to point this out. DD1 is offered healthy foods all the time but that doesn't mean she eats them. She was SO much less picky as a young toddler than she is now at almost 2.5. She's also very skinny for her age so as long as she eats something, I'm happy.
On the other hand, DD2 eats everything I put in front of her. It is much easier to feed a baby healthy foods than it is a tantrum throwing, picky toddler/preschooler.
When my son was 1 we hung out with his cousin who was 2.5. His cousin had plain pasta and ice cream for dinner. I was silently judging his mom the whole time because my son ate anything I put in front of him and always had a fruit or veggie with each meal. Now he is 2.5 and I am happy if he eats anything. I always give him a veggie and fruit with lunch but the other part of it is often mac and cheese or chicken nuggets. It is hard to get him to eat any of it. It is a lot easier to judge before you have a toddler.
I agree. I'm sick of the holier than thou "I don't judge" posts. Everyone judges. Own up to it so we can have some interesting discussions here.
I don't think anyone is saying they don't judge anyone, any mom, etc... they are saying that this is not something judge-worthy... and offering up examples of why --- to show the OP that maybe she needs to chill out with the judging when she has so little info about the situation, etc.
This. Who said they don't judge? Just that this is lame to judge.
I fully admitted that I suck as a judger of library loudmouths. Of course, it could be a one-time, special occasion, organic, low-sodium variety lunch loudmouth.
But I still judged. I did. I admitted my shame.
My 4 year old eats. So I don't live the hell of a picky eater. I just don't have hot dogs or chicken nuggets in the house. I just have regular food. I do have mac&cheese. I'm not opposed to the picky eater, Special Friday, once in a while, Holiday hotdog, part-of-a-better-meal, etc.
She was really loud and obnoxious. That was part of it. The kids didn't seem interested in the over-processed options. My DD would be much more enticed/interested in blue berries or a banana. Today, DD ate a tunafish sandwich for lunch.
I judged the mom at the grocery store who picked up two packages of the double brownies at the checkout & offers them to her baby ( maybe 10 months) & 3 year old who weren't even asking for them! She was like who wants brownies? Then she unwrapped the two packages & handed them to the kids before they could even answer. So gross.
It is cracking me up that nearly all the people in this thread with older kids are all, "eh, my kid eats that stuff now and then, too" while the moms with one baby are horrified. Been there, judged that. My oldest ate an awesome variety of healthy food and next to no junk for a good two years. He still eats a ton of fresh fruits and veggies and lots of good stuff, but he is far less willing to just eat the dinner leftovers for lunch than he once was.
I have one kid and I totally wouldn't have judged this woman.
I'm lucky my kid loves all types of food, including ethnic dishes and fruits/veggies. Who knows when that might change though? I just try to offer her as much variety as I can. Today she had duck confit hash with potatoes, eggs, and pesto for lunch, and then had a chicken nugget Happy Meal for dinner.
Oh I judge, but not about food. DS1 is almost 4 and the only things he will eat for lunch or dinner are spaghettios, chicken nuggets, or PB&J. He hates cheese and lunch meat. Believe me I wish my kid would eat like a normal person and we introduce new foods all the time.
I don't think anyone is saying "never judge", it's just a whole lot harder to get some kids to eat than you realize.