I propose a sub board

[sara76]

In lieu of a few recent comments and remarks from different members of WCF, this board contains entirely too much mommy talk. I can think of 6 different members who have said that because of this fact they are no longer interested in the board or are taking a break, for many different reasons, all of which are warranted. I can also think of a lot of pregtastic ladies and lots of moms who need/want to vent/AW about this stage of our lives without offending others, at a place we were comfortable in before we got knocked up. What do we want to do? Should we ban mommy talk? Should we put a warning in the title that it contains mommy talk? Should we only talk about mommy stuff on a certain day? No way. This local board is general forum where we should post as we wish without "rules."

So we are at a catch 22 here. Ladies who are legitimately hurt and turned away because of overabundance of baby talk can't browse without it being in their face, and those who want to talk about baby stuff with their local ladies are afraid of offending others. Therefore our board has practically gone dead.

Now that we are on GBCN, can put spaces between our paragraphs and say the word fuck, and have an MC who actually listens to us unlike when we were TN, I wonder if everyone agrees we should request to add a WCF sub board for "mommy talk" or whatever we want to title it? There if someone wants to bitch about morning sickness, or tell an adorable baby story, we are not going to hurt someones feelings or trigger others gag reflexes. And then maybe the main WCF board will get to see new posts from people who used to hang before the baby boom.

Anyone agree or disagree?

[imalwaysme79]

As one of "those people" who made a comment, I like the idea of a sub-board. I think the whole "baby related" note as a title to a post, further throws it in someone's face that there is yet another post about kids. Please don't get me wrong, I love kids, and really want some of my own. But since, at this stage of my life, it's not happening any time soon, I just like to keep all that talk to a minimum. I'm sorry what I'm saying offends anyone, but that's just my point of view and my opinion. I miss this board. I really do.

[stingsharkruns]

I vote sub-board.

[pinkwillow]

Sub-board!

[guestess]

Why not create a WCF Baby proboard, like thebump? Just be sure to use it.

I bet your posts will diminish significantly and this board will be just as boring as it ever was on thenest. You can only hope the non-mom posts will increase by others thanks to relegating yourselves to a pro-kid board.

[moonstone523]

Jun 3, 2012 16:30:56 GMT -5 @guestess said:

Why not create a WCF Baby proboard, like thebump? Just be sure to use it.

I bet your posts will diminish significantly and this board will be just as boring as it ever was on thenest. You can only hope the non-mom posts will increase by others thanks to relegating yourselves to a pro-kid board.

Laura? Nicole? That's my guess.

ETA - I like the sub board idea, but here's what my magic eight ball says.... Everyone that complains about mommy posts will still lurk on that other board as the WCF board will slow down... Unless people start contributing non-mommy things to keep this one going. You know that quote... "be the change..."

[sara76]

I like that idea. There aren't any other local boards on GBCN Baby yet so I didn't think of it but it makes sense. That sounds better to me. Moms? Want to see if that's an option instead? There's enough of us to keep it busy and then the WCF can come back alive.

[sara76]

Whatever we decide to do let's do it soon because I've got lots of baby stuff I want to talk about!

[alzi]

Jun 3, 2012 16:30:56 GMT -5 @guestess said:

Why not create a WCF Baby proboard, like thebump? Just be sure to use it.

I bet your posts will diminish significantly and this board will be just as boring as it ever was on thenest. You can only hope the non-mom posts will increase by others thanks to relegating yourselves to a pro-kid board.

I kind of agree. This board has been sooooo slow for so long. Just label your posts so someone who doesn't want to read it can skip it. I would bet a million nest dollars (pro board dollars?) that this board will die completely if it's split in two.

[stingsharkruns]

I think it will die as well, but I'm over all the baby/kid posts.

I guess since pretty much everyone is having kids or has kids already, I have nothing in common with most ladies anymore, and that's fine. I get that at this point in our lives it's "normal" to have kids..but I don't plan on having kids and I have little interest in kid related activities.
I'll stick to the h&f board.

[sara76]

Alzi as far as labeling it baby related, see crazynascarchicks thoughts. I agree this board will likely die, 99% of the threads on the first page are started by moms and half of them are baby related half aren't. But the non moms so far are loud and clear with exclamation points that they would rather we took our thoughts elsewhere. We outwore our welcome and I need a home.

[sara76]

Bye Jena. Sorry for the trouble.

[alzi]

There is always the babies NOT on the brain board....

I don't know, I understand why, but think it is dumb to let the board die.

Sara, you can always migrate over to ml;)

[pinkwillow]

Sara, can you just step back for one second and maybe consider WHY some of us aren't comfortable with the mommy posts? I wasn't going to say anything but now I feel the need. Lets take me for example. Lets examine why I would prefer a mommy sub board. I'm having a major medical procedure and orthodontic work that prevents me from being able to try to get pregnant right now and before this decision to fix my medical issue we tried unsuccessfully for 4 months. I very much want to be a mommy, more than I can describe. Reading the constant posts on mom stuff hurts my heart and honestly sara, you are the worst offender. On mother's day I had a very emotional moment because I wish I were a mom and am not and won't be for some time. I know the reason DH gave into my road bike purchase is because he knew I needed a new distraction.

So my point here is take a second to realize that when I say I want a sub board it's not because the constant mom talk annoys me or that I don't like ya'll. It's because it hurts sometimes to read. That doesn't mean I don't like hearing funny stories or that your awesome weekend involved your kids. It means tone it down a tad.

[pinkwillow]

Jun 3, 2012 17:22:41 GMT -5 sara76 said:

Bye Jena. Sorry for the trouble.

Wow.

I'll be over on h&f too then...

[alzi]

Seriously? This board is not themed. People can talk about whatever they want.

Pink- I am really sorry you are going through this right now. Truly I am. But I also think its unfair to ask people to "tone it down" or saying sara is the worst offender.

On many other boards there are labels you can use so that people can choose not to read a post if they want. I think that is more than adequate.

[bookqueen15]

I agree, I think adding a sub board for mom/kid/pregnancy talk is a good idea. It's working really well on the Money Matters national board. I think adding a sub board to here is better than completely moving it to a local bump board. This we can choose to view it along with the main board if we want to or just ignore it completely, and we might have a better shot of this board not completely dying out.

[sara76]

I dont have a problem with your reason. I have a gigantic respect for Heather, Kathy and Lauren and anyone else who is TTC. But I have a problem with Jena blowing off her friends because they are at different stages in life. Whatever, it's a message board. It's not real life. But it used to be.

[imalwaysme79]

Jun 3, 2012 17:38:22 GMT -5 pinkwillow said:

So my point here is take a second to realize that when I say I want a sub board it's not because the constant mom talk annoys me or that I don't like ya'll. It's because it hurts sometimes to read. That doesn't mean I don't like hearing funny stories or that your awesome weekend involved your kids. It means tone it down a tad.

This is my point exactly.

I'm sorry that my post stirred the pot, and that this has become an issue, and maybe I should have just remained a lurker.

[stingsharkruns]

My "friends" know how to contact me.

[pinkwillow]

Jun 3, 2012 17:44:48 GMT -5 imalwaysme79 said:

Jun 3, 2012 17:38:22 GMT -5 pinkwillow said:

So my point here is take a second to realize that when I say I want a sub board it's not because the constant mom talk annoys me or that I don't like ya'll. It's because it hurts sometimes to read. That doesn't mean I don't like hearing funny stories or that your awesome weekend involved your kids. It means tone it down a tad.

This is my point exactly.

I'm sorry that my post stirred the pot, and that this has become an issue, and maybe I should have just remained a lurker.

Don't be. This was a long time coming.

Sent from my PC36100 using ProBoards

[moonstone523]

This just spiraled out of control.

I don't think anyone has ill intentions when posting "mommy" things. Sara offered a solution to the "mommy talk" and it seemed like a win-win.

There doesn't need to be people leaving or name calling over this.

[jen812]

Jun 3, 2012 18:09:21 GMT -5 moonstone523 said:

This just spiraled out of control.

I don't think anyone has ill intentions when posting "mommy" things. Sara offered a solution to the "mommy talk" and it seemed like a win-win.

There doesn't need to be people leaving or name calling over this.

I completely agree with Moonstone. That was unfair to target Sara.
As I mentioned in the other post, I try to be conscious of other peoples BR situations. I've been there. I get it.
I like Sara's idea of the sub board. I think that's a perfect solution. It's up to everyone to keep the main board alive. Stop lurking & create a new topic once in a while.

[stingsharkruns]

One person said something re: Sara, that's hardly targeting.

[jen812]

Jun 3, 2012 18:47:25 GMT -5 stingsharkruns said:

One person said something re: Sara, that's hardly targeting.

Maybe 'targeting' was a bad choice of words. I was going to say attacking, but that's not really what I'm looking for either. Regardless, i felt it was harsh.

[imalwaysme79]

I feel that this thread is partially my fault, and for that I'm sorry.
I initially stepped away from the boards when my marriage ended, and then I moved back down South. I keep in contact with some of you on FB, others have defriended me. That's all fine and well. I don't mind. I thought I would come by and see how everyone is doing, because, really, truly, I miss you guys, and the board. So when someone mentioned that I should stick around, I was honest as to the reason why I keep leaving when I do pop in and say hi. There are many reasons why baby related posts are hard for different people, and that's why I honestly think that a sub board is a good solution. I wouldn't pinpoint anyone in particular on here who is "worse" than the other, but sometimes it does get to be a little bit much.
Again, I apologize to anyone I've offended.

[sara76]

Oh god. OK Pink I want to respond better to you right now but my hands are full so I will just do the best that I can. Basically I am sorry that I have offended you. Sincerely. I hope you know that was not an intention. I have been trying to tame it down on the board lately. As far as Facebook, well my family and friends from home are there and I AW there. I hope that anyone who doesn't like to see my feed hides me, blocks me, or unfriends me, I will not take offense. I understand. It's not for everyone. As far as the forum goes, I was truely looking for a solution to this and not wanting to cause trouble. But I think it was coming reguardless.

As far as Mothers Day, I'm sorry you were sad. I had a shittastic Mothers Day also for different reasons. I am not getting along with my mother. It makes me sad. My dad died when I was 16 and I wish he could meet my daughter. H was gone for 14 hours working and I spent the day in the house with the baby pissed off at H because while he was gone I got an email that he won a damn ebay auction while I stress everyday about how we are going to provide for this child with no savings, only debt.

I AW my baby. Guilty. And I know you want one. For that I am sorry. But I am 34. I got lucky. You have a long time to go to keep loving that husband of yours. Enjoy running. I'm jelly of all the fun you have with your BFF feeling the wind in your hair, accomplishing all these awesome things in your life.

Anyway, this isn't as good a response as I would like to pen,err type, but I have to run. Just enjoy all the good you have, unfriend me on Facebook if you haven't already, and consider me toned down on here.

[aegis2005]

A sub board will equal two slow boards. If people want to make the board less "baby focused" then start non-baby threads. If you don't want to read baby posts, don't open them. Honestly, it's really easy to spot a baby post from the subject.

[jennifer8080]

Wowzers. I see the board dying real fast regardless of what decision is made, after some of these comments. I'm probably one of the "worst offenders" along with Sara. But I'm not going to lie, babies are my life these days and quite honestly I don't have much else to talk about. I obviously don't want to offend anyone, and I can certainly relate to struggles with TTC as well as loss. I have a child with special needs, and sometimes it upsets me to read about another little one who is younger doing something Kennedy can't do yet. But I put on my big girl pants and I count my blessings for what I do have. In my case, that's an amazing little girl who has overcome so much, and who is happy and healthy.

Perhaps this is like real life where friends grow apart when they reach different points in their lives. Sadly, I've lost a lot of friends since becoming a mom, because they don't have kids, don't want kids, or aren't married. I dropped off TN and when we moved over here I started posting more because it was convenient. Maybe "us moms" do need somewhere else to post, that's not offensive or bothersome to those who aren't interested. Personally, I think a lot of the "mom talk" got more spread out when we stopped posting the pregnancy/mom check in on a weekly basis.

[lauren9317]

I haven't been on this board in a bunch of days and I didn't get to read all the posts but I still want to throw my 2 cents in. I don't often comment on the pregnancy or baby-related posts but it does NOT bother me that they are on here. As I think a few have mentioned, this board will probably be extremely dead without all of those posts. IMO, they should still be on here and if you don't want to read or comment on them, you don't have to. With this new format, you can hover over the post titles to get kind of a preview of what the post is about, in case the subject doesn't reveal it. So I sometimes use that tool and I just don't open a post if it's about something I'm not interested in. No big deal IMO.