What things are ok to discuss with a mom? It's ok to tell her that it's probably too early to FF a car seat, but not ok to say something about giving a kid booze...I'm just wondering where the line is?
What things are ok to discuss with a mom? It's ok to tell her that it's probably too early to FF a car seat, but not ok to say something about giving a kid booze...I'm just wondering where the line is?
It's ok to say something if you see a mom beat her kid. Otherwise, MYOFB.
What things are ok to discuss with a mom? It's ok to tell her that it's probably too early to FF a car seat, but not ok to say something about giving a kid booze...I'm just wondering where the line is?
this is a different subject. The op was talking about a stranger at a restaurant.
What things are ok to discuss with a mom? It's ok to tell her that it's probably too early to FF a car seat, but not ok to say something about giving a kid booze...I'm just wondering where the line is?
this is a different subject. The op was talking about a stranger at a restaurant.
I'm not a mom, and have no dog in this fight, so I'm just asking out of genuine interest.
So if you see a stranger in a parking lot with a FF infant, you say nothing? Because it's not your kid?
When I was two I was in a grocery cart, but not strapped in. The cart tipped over, I broke my femur and ended up in the hospital for 3 weeks. When I see a mom with a kid not strapped into the cart, or standing up, or whatever I want to say, "Eesh, be careful with that!" but I never would. But it would be ok if I did? Or no way jose.
MrsAxilla - Really? Physical abuse is the *only* time you speak up?
this is a different subject. The op was talking about a stranger at a restaurant.
MrsAxilla - Really? Physical abuse is the *only* time you speak up?
I don't like people in my business and I don't get in theirs. I'm hard pressed to think of any reason I'd say something to a stranger. Maybe if I saw their kid shoplift or something.
Jack asked to try my wine once. I held it up for him to drink, he took a wiff and was repulsed. I knew that would be his reaction.
This of course was in my home so all of you judgy judgers wouldn't see!
This is a little different because the taste of wine is pretty tart to a child and even some adults, but a margarita is delicious!
I'm surprised that this comment got ignored.
So, giving your child a sip of alcohol is illegal, terrible, horrible, immoral, not safe, etc... but only if it tastes good? You compared it to giving your child a cigarette, but now wine is different because it's tart so they probably wouldn't enjoy it.
Post by W.T.Faulkner on Jun 22, 2013 12:29:03 GMT -5
Sips, though? It's one thing if the kid has his or her own margarita, but a sip or two? The kid probably won't even like it, and I don't see the big deal.
Perhaps this means I'll be too lenient of a parent when the time comes, but I'd rather treat alcohol as a substance safe to use in moderation at the proper age, rather than an unspeakable thing that Only Mommy Can Ever Have And If You Drink It You Die.
That doesn't mean I will be supplying my children with alcohol at their high school parties, but it also means that when they' want a sip of mine when they're little, it can be the first step in an open conversation about alcohol.
this is a different subject. The op was talking about a stranger at a restaurant.
I'm not a mom, and have no dog in this fight, so I'm just asking out of genuine interest.
So if you see a stranger in a parking lot with a FF infant, you say nothing? Because it's not your kid?
When I was two I was in a grocery cart, but not strapped in. The cart tipped over, I broke my femur and ended up in the hospital for 3 weeks. When I see a mom with a kid not strapped into the cart, or standing up, or whatever I want to say, "Eesh, be careful with that!" but I never would. But it would be ok if I did? Or no way jose.
MrsAxilla - Really? Physical abuse is the *only* time you speak up?
lola IMO unless the child is in physical danger jus MYOB. People get really ticked off about their parenting choices. You won't get anything out of it. An depending on who you end up making a comment to you may even end up with a shiner.
I would only speak up in clear and imminent danger, which would almost always be if a parent was distracted anyway and not judgemental. For example, if a toddler is in the middle of the road and a car is careening toward them, or in your example lola, if the cart were actually starting to tip over. And fwiw, you probably would've ended up badly hurt with or without a strap..
What things are ok to discuss with a mom? It's ok to tell her that it's probably too early to FF a car seat, but not ok to say something about giving a kid booze...I'm just wondering where the line is?
I don't see how a single sip is the same as a FF car seat. Maybe if the five year old has a full glass of beer that is all for them, but that is not the case here.
I hear ya Marle. I have two sisters with kids and trust, I STFU about ANY thought I have about what they do with those kids. I wouldn't say anything to the mom with the marg, I wouldn't say anything to a FF car seat, etc.
I just feel like people on here have been all "GOOD FOR YOU" in the past when somebody talks to a mom about a FF car seat (right? we just had that. the OP sent a Facebook message and the general feedback here was "you did the right thing!"), but when it comes to this situation it's "STFU, it's not your kid."
I just wondered if there was a line. Imminent danger = speak up, anything else = STFU? And how do you decide what's "Imminent"? Arguably, FF isn't dangerous unless you're in an accident. Is an accident imminent just because you're in the car?
I hear ya Marle. I have two sisters with kids and trust, I STFU about ANY thought I have about what they do with those kids. I wouldn't say anything to the mom with the marg, I wouldn't say anything to a FF car seat, etc.
I just feel like people on here have been all "GOOD FOR YOU" in the past when somebody talks to a mom about a FF car seat (right? we just had that. the OP sent a Facebook message and the general feedback here was "you did the right thing!"), but when it comes to this situation it's "STFU, it's not your kid."
I just wondered if there was a line. Imminent danger = speak up, anything else = STFU? And how do you decide what's "Imminent"? Arguably, FF isn't dangerous unless you're in an accident. Is an accident imminent just because you're in the car?
Wasn't the FF email a politely worded message to an actual friend? More like a head's up, you may not have known xyz? Whereas saying something to a stranger in a restaurant is just going to come across as straight up, holier than thou judging and rude as hell. You're not going to accomplish anything with that.
Lola, I think there are 2 main differences -- audience and goal. With the alcohol it was a stranger (stfu unless danger is imminent), and the goal was to judge, not educate. There is no chance that Margarita Momma needs a lesson that alcohol should not be part of a kid's diet. Speaking up serves only to attempt to make her feel like shit. There ARE people who don't know all of the guidelines for child seats, so speaking up could be beneficial when done politely.
If you called me a tool in public (from another table) I'd call you a passive-aggressive, sanctimonious bitch. WIN WIN!
Anyway, I can't wait until you pop out that kid and start getting judged for dumb shit that's nobody else's business. See ya in about a year!
Fine by me-everyone is entitled to their own opinion. If I were serving my 5 year old alcohol I would deserve it.
Really? Serving? I don't think one sip equals "serving" a 5 year old alcohol. She didn't give the kid a whole glass of margarita or a shot of tequila. Come on.
Lola, I think there are 2 main differences -- audience and goal. With the alcohol it was a stranger (stfu unless danger is imminent), and the goal was to judge, not educate. There is no chance that Margarita Momma needs a lesson that alcohol should not be part of a kid's diet. Speaking up serves only to attempt to make her feel like shit. There ARE people who don't know all of the guidelines for child seats, so speaking up could be beneficial when done politely.
we can make it to 10 pages! we just need a little more hyperbole! "a sip" = serving underage kids hurricanes! "side-eye" = slapping that child-hating bitch mother across the face! someone! make another analogy!
You guys are all heathens111!!! I won't bring alcohol in my house or bring my kids anywhere where it is served so that they won't potentially smell it! I mean, if we're going to do that, why not inject them with "just a sip" of mommy's heroin???!?
This is a little different because the taste of wine is pretty tart to a child and even some adults, but a margarita is delicious!
I'm surprised that this comment got ignored.
So, giving your child a sip of alcohol is illegal, terrible, horrible, immoral, not safe, etc... but only if it tastes good? You compared it to giving your child a cigarette, but now wine is different because it's tart so they probably wouldn't enjoy it.
If you give a child something that is appealing to a child, they are probably going to want more than one sip. If you give them something that tastes gross, they probably won't be asking again anytime soon. It's better than a margarita, but it's still not okay, no.
I call it "fostering independence" and then I don't feel bad at all. No need to up in my kid's grill if he doesn't need or want it.
It was pretty funny. I didn't even have a chance to put her in her place, her husband did it for her. She was like 'if I were her Mother, I would have talked her ear off'. And her H was like 'yes, you certainly have no problem with that.' Lol. What a bitch though.
We have to be careful about leaving margaritas unattended on the coffee table since one of our dogs likes to sneak sips of them. Sneaky puppy!
Other than that, I got nothing.
If you hold any drink too low in my house, my pitty will cuddle up to you and when you're not looking stick her tongue in it. Wine and beer too. She's a fucking alcoholic, that dog.
We have to be careful about leaving margaritas unattended on the coffee table since one of our dogs likes to sneak sips of them. Sneaky puppy!
Other than that, I got nothing.
If you hold any drink too low in my house, my pitty will cuddle up to you and when you're not looking stick her tongue in it. Wine and beer too. She's a fucking alcoholic, that dog.
Heh. Both of our dogs are cuddle bugs too, though only the one likes (and tries to drink) certain drinks. Cheeky monkey. heh
Our other dog sneezes within 90 seconds of being near alcohol. Some more potent types have her sneezing sooner, but it's always a given there will be a sneeze.
So, giving your child a sip of alcohol is illegal, terrible, horrible, immoral, not safe, etc... but only if it tastes good? You compared it to giving your child a cigarette, but now wine is different because it's tart so they probably wouldn't enjoy it.
If you give a child something that is appealing to a child, they are probably going to want more than one sip. If you give them something that tastes gross, they probably won't be asking again anytime soon. It's better than a margarita, but it's still not okay, no.
You said it's different, not me. Plus, you know, everyone finds the same tastes appealing. So your logic is totally sound. Absolutely.