I would love to see this in action. There is no way it sticks.
I NIP a million times and I bet millions that most of the time, no one knew. Certainly, no one saw boob. I nursed at graduation at my school and while running a rehearsal with 8th grade boys. No one saw a thing. I am actually a more discrete nurser with no cover than with since my kids both kicked that thing off and screamed, thus calling attention to my boobs.
Fuck that shit. Here's an idea - stop looking at my boobs and read your book.
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”
Also, so we're all working from the same premise in case tillie isn't alone - here's a picture of what looks to me like a pretty typical nursing pair.
You see a pretty fair amount of boob. Many times you'd see less than this because the baby's head would be angled more toward the mom. Sometimes you'd see a lot more skin if the mom had bigger boobs. But thanks to the kid's head you'd see zero boob from the other side or the front. And from this side you really see about as much boob as you'd see in a low cut v-neck. And we all know AA wouldn't be handing out blankets to their passengers in low cut tops.
You might get more of an eyeful if the kid pops off, or while during latch on or when they're done while the mom is rearranging her clothing. But a cover isn't going to be a 100% protection against random flashes since kids pull them off or up pretty frequently.
See that's not what it looked like when I nursed. I always wore a tank so you didn't see belly (which, PS, much more offensive for people to see on me than boob), so I pulled up my top shirt and pulled down my tank. Then I put the top shirt over the top of my boob. You could literally see no boob.
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”
Really, I am not. I just don't want to be sitting next to someone on a plane with their boob hanging out. It's not somewhere I can just walk away from.
And I didn't want to nurse uncovered but DD had serious hate for the cover and would refuse to nurse under it. Screaming hungry baby is way more disruptive then a uncovered nursing session. Unless you have a problem with a baby having a bottle during a flght get over your prudishness and accept that babies eat and its NBD.
A NIP story- We were at DH's cousin's bday dinner at her other grandparents house, DD needed to eat so I slipped into the guest room since as stated she hated the cover and I wanted some privacy. Not being a home I'd been in much I didn't realize that the toys were in that room so in bops the 2 4 yr olds who ask what I'm doing I tell them feeding DD. They say cool. I think its over until at dinner one of them said "DD" eats from Hopecounts boob but we eat real food. At which point I die of laughter and embarassment.
The bad one was the last time I tried using a cover. we were at the beach with all DH's family (Gparents, Parantes, Aunts/uncles, cousins) and I decided to give nursing under the cover another try, about2 minutes in DD flings her arm up uncovering me while screaming her head off just as 12 yr old boy cousin walks in. That was awkward, fortunately he has a little sister who is much younger who was nursed a couple years before so it wasn't too big a deal. that's the day I packed up the cover and just did what I needed to, usually people got way less of a show that way.
I would love to see this in action. There is no way it sticks.
I NIP a million times and I bet millions that most of the time, no one knew. Certainly, no one saw boob. I nursed at graduation at my school and while running a rehearsal with 8th grade boys. No one saw a thing. I am actually a more discrete nurser with no cover than with since my kids both kicked that thing off and screamed, thus calling attention to my boobs.
Fuck that shit. Here's an idea - stop looking at my boobs and read your book.
Yeah, when DS was wee (maybe 4 mos or so) my MIL came to visit us for a week. About five days in, she was all, "OMG, it seems like you never feed him? Are you changing it around because I'm here, because, you know, he needs to eat a lot!"
Me: "Um, no, MIL... you know every time he's in the carrier with me? Yeah, he's nursing then."
This was in our house, where I was really making no effort at all to be 'discreet.'
Actually, I was in a store and someone was doing just that.
shut the front door!!
are you okay? I've heard that seeing a boob hanging out can cause irreparable damage to the eyes.
Win.
Really, I always think that's a dumb argument.
"Well, I totally once saw a boob while a mum was nursing. Totally did. Boob."
So, like, what does that mean to you? It happened once, or maybe a couple of times (because it seems people who cry out for "discreet nursing" seem to be the ones accosted by whipper-outters everywhere they go while the rest of the world seems to have to deal with that trauma far less regularly) and that means what to you? That you are always at risk of being faced with naked boobs on rogue breastfeeding mothers?
Clearly, obviously, there are far, far more times that you pass a woman breastfeeding and don't even notice. How do I know this? Because you have and you didn't even notice (or surely you'd be crying out with that as an example of the offensiveness of boob). Which means most mums, just naturally and comfortably, breastfeed with some level of discretion. Not to protect anyone else's delicate sensibilities but because it's just how they do it. Some can't or don't but I think that as adults, we can all survive that rare case.
More importantly, I think it's ridiculous, shortsighted and lacking in compassion for others to base blanket policy about anything on the outliers. What if that egregious offense, that full boobage view, happened to be just as that kid ripped off her discreet covering? What if that's the only way she can make it work? What if she's screwing with you and "whips it out" just to play with the ridiculous discomfort some feel at seeing less boob that I saw in the opening credit of Spring Breakers? We don't know. And it doesn't matter.
But what we DO know is that, thus far, no one has died from witnessing a baby eating. Which makes this a ridiculous discussion to keep having over and over and over, particularly coming up with a random anecdote to prove a point.
Post by EllieArroway on Aug 6, 2013 12:40:33 GMT -5
Since my kid is conveniently nursing while I read this post, I took this helpful picture to show tillie what real-life nursing without a cover looks like. DD is eight months old and will not eat with a cover on. She just rips it off while I'm trying to get her to latch & ends up exposing me way more than I am when I don't cover.
I'm sorry to scar you all for life. I hope your eyes recover soon. PS the giant red mark? That's because she loves to pinch me while she eats. Jerk.
ETA: And actually, this is how I nurse at home, but in public I would be wearing more than just a tank top. I usually wear a tank top or cami under another shirt, so I pull the shirt up and the tank down. At that point you really can't see anything at all unless you are looking directly at my boobs right at the second that DD latches.
Also, so we're all working from the same premise in case tillie isn't alone - here's a picture of what looks to me like a pretty typical nursing pair.
You see a pretty fair amount of boob. Many times you'd see less than this because the baby's head would be angled more toward the mom. Sometimes you'd see a lot more skin if the mom had bigger boobs. But thanks to the kid's head you'd see zero boob from the other side or the front. And from this side you really see about as much boob as you'd see in a low cut v-neck. And we all know AA wouldn't be handing out blankets to their passengers in low cut tops.
You might get more of an eyeful if the kid pops off, or while during latch on or when they're done while the mom is rearranging her clothing. But a cover isn't going to be a 100% protection against random flashes since kids pull them off or up pretty frequently.
See that's not what it looked like when I nursed. I always wore a tank so you didn't see belly (which, PS, much more offensive for people to see on me than boob), so I pulled up my top shirt and pulled down my tank. Then I put the top shirt over the top of my boob. You could literally see no boob.
Yeah, I do the same thing. But I specifically looked for a picture with a higher amount of exposed boob taken from the angle of an onlooker (i.e. not from the mom's view) just to get the "worst case" scenario.
There were lots of pictures with zero exposed boob, and then tons more pictures with a ton of boob - but they were all totally topless pics from the hospital or from instructional nursing websites or taken from the mom's POV.
And then I had to stop searching for the "perfect" illustrative photo because looking at all the cute little nursing babies made my boobs leak.
Do seeing women on the beach in tiny bikinis bother you just as much? What can you not handle about seeing the same boobs being used for what they are actually made for? Do nipples make your eyes burn?
So...those are real, right? fake boobs don't jiggle like that do they?
I think the gif of ellen staring at Katy perry's knockers is one of my top 10 favorite GBCN sigs ever. I can't think who has it, but it always makes me smile.
Every woman I've seen NIP *is* discreet. I think it's people who've never observed a woman NIP who think it's all about breasts flying through the air. Well, perhaps part of the reason they've never seen a woman NIP is because women are generally very discreet about it.
And I guess if you're a large-breasted woman, you can't feed your kid. Too bad so sad.
I have big boobs. When I used to nurse, I'd fling my big nekkid titties around and try to hit people in the head.
I would love to see this in action. There is no way it sticks.
I NIP a million times and I bet millions that most of the time, no one knew. Certainly, no one saw boob. I nursed at graduation at my school and while running a rehearsal with 8th grade boys. No one saw a thing. I am actually a more discrete nurser with no cover than with since my kids both kicked that thing off and screamed, thus calling attention to my boobs.
Fuck that shit. Here's an idea - stop looking at my boobs and read your book.
Yeah, when DS was wee (maybe 4 mos or so) my MIL came to visit us for a week. About five days in, she was all, "OMG, it seems like you never feed him? Are you changing it around because I'm here, because, you know, he needs to eat a lot!"
Me: "Um, no, MIL... you know every time he's in the carrier with me? Yeah, he's nursing then."
This was in our house, where I was really making no effort at all to be 'discreet.'
See that's not what it looked like when I nursed. I always wore a tank so you didn't see belly (which, PS, much more offensive for people to see on me than boob), so I pulled up my top shirt and pulled down my tank. Then I put the top shirt over the top of my boob. You could literally see no boob.
Yeah, I do the same thing. But I specifically looked for a picture with a higher amount of exposed boob taken from the angle of an onlooker (i.e. not from the mom's view) just to get the "worst case" scenario.
There were lots of pictures with zero exposed boob, and then tons more pictures with a ton of boob - but they were all totally topless pics from the hospital or from instructional nursing websites or taken from the mom's POV.
And then I had to stop searching for the "perfect" illustrative photo because looking at all the cute little nursing babies made my boobs leak.
Word. I only shared that to say "I don't even show that much boob whilst nursing, and that's not offensive at all."
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”
Yeah, when DS was wee (maybe 4 mos or so) my MIL came to visit us for a week. About five days in, she was all, "OMG, it seems like you never feed him? Are you changing it around because I'm here, because, you know, he needs to eat a lot!"
Me: "Um, no, MIL... you know every time he's in the carrier with me? Yeah, he's nursing then."
This was in our house, where I was really making no effort at all to be 'discreet.'
Tell me how!
Sent from my EVO
I used a Beco carrier. It's like an Ergo, but it's taller... the one in the picture is a Boba, which is similar, I think
You can do it in an Ergo, but they're shorter, so you're less likely to be able to do it completely hidden like in the picture.
Baby has to be old enough to have head control, but not so big where they're coming out the top. There's a sweet spot there of several months.
I'd ordinarily wear a tee with a nursing tank under it. Baby in carrier in front, shirt up, tank unlatched. All you have to do is kind of fiddle with the carrier to figure how to do it. Get help the first time. You want to have baby not in the middle, but off to the side where they're going to nurse, and probably a tad lower than you're used to.
First time I did it, I basically moved DD to where I wanted her to be, then had H tighten up the straps to hold her there. After a few times, I could do it myself.
Post by blindyswife on Aug 6, 2013 13:40:54 GMT -5
tillie, is @elliearroway 's photo what you would call 'boob all flopping out' like you claim to have witnessed? Because I've seen just as much boob at the store on teenage girls walking around with all their cleavage on display. Is cleavage also offensive to you? And how do you ever manage to go to a beach or pool? Boobies everywhere!
Side note: I always felt like wearing a draping cover over me and L caused way more attention to us than when I just did my normal thing without the cover.
Really, I am not. I just don't want to be sitting next to someone on a plane with their boob hanging out. It's not somewhere I can just walk away from.
Is that how you think breastfeeding works? Have you have seen a woman breastfeed? You don't take the breast from your bra and dangle it over the kid's mouth playing "Catch the nipple." ^o)
If you were able to walk away from a nursing mother, you would be doing her a favor.
tillie, is @elliearroway 's photo what you would call 'boob all flopping out' like you claim to have witnessed? Because I've seen just as much boob at the store on teenage girls walking around with all their cleavage on display. Is cleavage also offensive to you? And how do you ever manage to go to a beach or pool? Boobies everywhere!
Side note: I always felt like wearing a draping cover over me and L caused way more attention to us than when I just did my normal thing without the cover.
Definitely - how many people are wearing capes in a restaurant on summer afternoon?
1. Plan ahead. If you're planning to visit some place that might attract new mothers, such as a park or a discount store, try to time your visit so that you're less likely to be there at the same time as a breastfeeding mother. Midnight is good.
2. Practice in front of a mirror. At first, your shock may show plainly on your face, so try sitting in front of a mirror and picturing a breastfeeding mother. Keep trying until your expression stays neutral. You can also try having a friend or your spouse watch you and provide helpful comments.
3. Dress appropriately. Try wearing a scarf or a top that has a hood. That way, if you encounter a breastfeeding mother, it's simple to pull the fabric over your eyes, or to pull the hood forward to act as blinders so you can easily avert your eyes and not suffer any peripheral vision of a breastfeeding baby.
4. Be discreet. Avoid calling attention to yourself, and there will be no problem. If you're ostentatious about your disapproval, you're just inviting a confrontation.
5. Find a private place. If you absolutely can't avoid voicing your discomfort with public breastfeeding, there are plenty of appropriate places. Go to the nearest changing room and let out your feelings. Almost every establishment has convenient public bathrooms where you can have total seclusion while you vent. If all else fails, go out to your car - it's a little inconvenient, but well worth it to avoid making a scene.
By following these simple steps, you can make sure that public breastfeeding never leads to ugly confrontations or public relations battles, and everyone will be much happier.
1. Plan ahead. If you're planning to visit some place that might attract new mothers, such as a park or a discount store, try to time your visit so that you're less likely to be there at the same time as a breastfeeding mother. Midnight is good.
2. Practice in front of a mirror. At first, your shock may show plainly on your face, so try sitting in front of a mirror and picturing a breastfeeding mother. Keep trying until your expression stays neutral. You can also try having a friend or your spouse watch you and provide helpful comments.
3. Dress appropriately. Try wearing a scarf or a top that has a hood. That way, if you encounter a breastfeeding mother, it's simple to pull the fabric over your eyes, or to pull the hood forward to act as blinders so you can easily avert your eyes and not suffer any peripheral vision of a breastfeeding baby.
4. Be discreet. Avoid calling attention to yourself, and there will be no problem. If you're ostentatious about your disapproval, you're just inviting a confrontation.
5. Find a private place. If you absolutely can't avoid voicing your discomfort with public breastfeeding, there are plenty of appropriate places. Go to the nearest changing room and let out your feelings. Almost every establishment has convenient public bathrooms where you can have total seclusion while you vent. If all else fails, go out to your car - it's a little inconvenient, but well worth it to avoid making a scene.
By following these simple steps, you can make sure that public breastfeeding never leads to ugly confrontations or public relations battles, and everyone will be much happier.
Too bad asdfjkl is busy moving. I'd like to see her in this thread. I know she has a vendetta against Staples because of their policy towards employees who pump. I feel like she already hates American Airlines because of their stroller policy.
I saw the thread title and immediately thought, "I wonder what asdfjkl and mominatrix have to say about this..."
I will say that attitudes like Tillie's gave me major fucking anxiety when I first started feeding zb. We had to use a nipple shield for a while, and there was no discreet way to do it even with a cover. Then I got all honeybadger about it and said, "fuck it, don't care."
As everyone else has said, YOU have the power to look away. Some douche on FB tried to argue that he's a man, of course he's going to stare. As long as you don't touch, fuck if I care. Do you see a pattern? I don't care what people fucking think. ::plops tits on desk::