Finally decided to have a kid..need a MM plan

[chessie]

There was a lot of conversations going back and forth last 7 years, but we figured we put a time frame on it. 3 years, we will either adopt or figure out something else.

So 3 years have to get our act together. Would like to pay off all our private SL's, have 20k in the bank just for kid expenses, and for time off during that time. My job does not allow for you to take PTO off during maternity leave-hence extra $ for that time off. We are expecting day care to be around 1500 a month, so paying off SL's probably be in our best interest.Finish small projects around the house, pay off car, go on crazy trips, live it up, etc.

Any other items I should add to the list, so we are fully ready? What were your preparation items while planning for a child- does not have to be necessarily be MM related.

[minzy]

I think you've got the financial bases covered - have adequate savings, a fund for projected start-up costs, enough to cover new ongoing expenses, pay off any debt you can beforehand, and travel while it is easier and still just the two of you. If it all possible, be able to live off of one income. We did all of those things before our daughter arrived and felt very ready for her.

Recalling that you are a horse person, if you get pregnant you might consider that your OB may not want you to ride, and that you may need someone else to exercise your horse/s. Also, I don't know how much time you spend with your horses a week, but, at least for us, "me time" significantly decreased with a kid. I think it would have been tough for either my husband or me to have remained committed to any time consuming hobbies (particularly with no family around) at the beginning of our daughter's life without feeling resentment to the other. (He curtailed the marathon running this past year because he didn't want to be away from her that much during his time off, and he knew it would have been tougher on me to have him gone frequently for big chunks of awake time.) Maybe for you that means selling a horse when your child arrives, or providing extra room in the budget for babysitting so you can do a long trail ride with your husband on a Saturday.

Good luck!

[Deleted]

Is this Audette? I can't keep up!

And your plan sounds good. Pay down debt and save!

[Ashley&Scott]

I think your mm plan sounds good. You're planning for initial baby costs, maternity leave & daycare. Don't forget to plan for increased health insurance costs too. Will the $20k be enough to also cover OOP labor & delivery charges?

Minzy has a good point about not having as much time for the horses. It won't always be that way but at least in the beginning it will be hard. I can't remember, how many horses do you have? You live on a farm don't you? Are there any other animals or farm duties you might need help with during the late pregnancy & newborn stages? Extra help in this area would be a huge benefit for you.

[chessie]

May 14, 2012 11:07:35 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Is this Audette? I can't keep up!

And your plan sounds good. Pay down debt and save!

Thanks! Riderpunk

I wanted to add, probably need a house cleaner for my own sanity.

[whitterbugk]

May 14, 2012 11:07:35 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Is this Audette? I can't keep up!

And your plan sounds good. Pay down debt and save!

I think it's riderpunk?

[Deleted]

Oh ok, I knew I knew you.

[chessie]

May 14, 2012 11:15:40 GMT -5 Ashley&Scott said:

I think your mm plan sounds good. You're planning for initial baby costs, maternity leave & daycare. Don't forget to plan for increased health insurance costs too. Will the $20k be enough to also cover OOP labor & delivery charges?

Minzy has a good point about not having as much time for the horses. It won't always be that way but at least in the beginning it will be hard. I can't remember, how many horses do you have? You live on a farm don't you? Are there any other animals or farm duties you might need help with during the late pregnancy & newborn stages? Extra help in this area would be a huge benefit for you.

Completely forgot about insurance. Sorta trying to keep it on the DL at work, but it looks like my insurance will double most likely another 200 a month give or take. Not sure on labor costs, or what other options I will have at this point. Just looking at doctors to see even if I can still have children- for so long I was told no way, figured try look at that further.

Currently I just have a mini, my horse and my friends horse- which I hope to hell they leave soon- since I don't have enough hours in a day! I do have 2 dogs as well. Don't have any other farm duties other then clean fields, feeding.., by far my farm is setup pretty easy though, which I don't think I will have too much trouble and have a few kids at a local barn that would love ride time in exchange for some farm chores.

Some great points though I didn't even consider. Most of my friends also riders- they ride up until the day they deliver and continue full active work, didn't even think I would have to stop anything.

[whitepicketfence]

We didn't really have a plan when we started TTC #1 so I think you're plan sounds great, LOL. Looking back, the only thing I regret is not living it up beforehand. I really wish we would have travelled more when it was just the two of us.

[chessie]

May 14, 2012 11:38:31 GMT -5 whitepicketfence said:

We didn't really have a plan when we started TTC #1 so I think you're plan sounds great, LOL. Looking back, the only thing I regret is not living it up beforehand. I really wish we would have travelled more when it was just the two of us.

That is what everyone has told us, travel, because you won't be doing it for quite some time..I hear it from everyone actually. I am trying to be overly cautious since neither of us have family nearby to ever help us.

[minzy]

May 14, 2012 11:27:16 GMT -5 chessie said:

Most of my friends also riders- they ride up until the day they deliver and continue full active work, didn't even think I would have to stop anything.

I was only guessing there, but I could see an OB advising against it because of the fall risk. Obviously that would be between you and your OB.

There are a lot of parallels between taking care of animals and raising a kid - namely, the incessant responsibility of it all. You and your husband are probably already in great shape for that!

[chessie]

Thanks everyone. Looks like I def have my work cut out for me. Probably be a little more per month then I had thought as well, between insurance, monthly costs, babysitting + daycare So I am going to average it to around 2k a month- to be safe. Biggest concern is my health really through all of this- which makes me think we will adopt-crossing that bridge when I get to it though.