Standby Wedding

[iammalcolmx]

This is fantastic!

[josieposy]

Apr 4, 2014 18:50:39 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

Apr 4, 2014 18:42:10 GMT -5 NitaX said:

Umm, the best man forgot the ring. The pastor thought it was a joke. Nope. The ring is at someone's house...

Maybe he was a standby groomsman.

You know really this is just poor planning on her part. No standby ring?

[secretlyevil]

Apr 4, 2014 18:08:46 GMT -5 @soudesafinado said:

Apr 4, 2014 17:49:21 GMT -5 NitaX said:

My phone will die because I forgot to charge it thanks to work being crazy.

But Trust, a full rundown will happen later.

Then you need to commandeer the husband's phone because this is a priority. I mean, really.

YES!

[secretlyevil]

I'm so glad I'm tipsy for this.

[curbsideprophet]

Too funny that he forgot the ring.

[laurenpetro]

Apr 4, 2014 18:57:31 GMT -5 @dontcallmeshirley1 said:

Apr 4, 2014 18:42:10 GMT -5 NitaX said:

Umm, the best man forgot the ring. The pastor thought it was a joke. Nope. The ring is at someone's house...

I can see it now. "Nobody go anywhere, I'll be back in twenty. Ron! RON!! Toss me your keys, man!"

I just snorted soda.

[Deleted]

Apr 4, 2014 18:57:31 GMT -5 @dontcallmeshirley1 said:

Apr 4, 2014 18:42:10 GMT -5 NitaX said:

Umm, the best man forgot the ring. The pastor thought it was a joke. Nope. The ring is at someone's house...

I can see it now. "Nobody go anywhere, I'll be back in twenty. Ron! RON!! Toss me your keys, man!"

I was late getting married because my husband left the ring back at a hotel 45 minutes away. He left to go get it and then someone told me what happened. He also left the marriage license. This is why there are a million and one pictures of me at my own wedding and about 20 of my husband.

I don't know why these fools didn't just go ahead with the wedding as scheduled. We could have come back to the wedding lady the next day with the license, no biggie.

[KB]

I am so happy right now.

[secretlyevil]

Apr 4, 2014 19:16:33 GMT -5 laurenpetro said:

Apr 4, 2014 18:57:31 GMT -5 @dontcallmeshirley1 said:

I can see it now. "Nobody go anywhere, I'll be back in twenty. Ron! RON!! Toss me your keys, man!"

I just snorted soda.

Soda? You're drinking soda!?! Light weight.

[laurenpetro]

Apr 4, 2014 19:21:39 GMT -5 secretlyevil said:

Apr 4, 2014 19:16:33 GMT -5 laurenpetro said:

I just snorted soda.

Soda? You're drinking soda!?! Light weight.

I'm seeing Divergent by myself. (FUCK YEAH!!!) I'll move onto the harder stuff later.

I am sad I'll miss the live blog for the next few hours, though.

[iammalcolmx]

Attention! I just got off the phone with NitaX her phone was dying but here is the report: They got to the reception and there was no place to sit because all of your cousins DID NOT RSVP but they showed up anyway. Nita knew the wedding coordinator who told her to sit at the reserved table for parents. Next Nita and her husband slid out the door, in silence, like real G's. They have now arrived at PF Changs to dinner. I briefly spoke t Mr. Nitaw who had me in stitches. I was instructed to pass along this information. She also repeated the Pastors confusion at the missing ring......

[gpw]

Apr 4, 2014 18:50:39 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

Apr 4, 2014 18:42:10 GMT -5 NitaX said:

Umm, the best man forgot the ring. The pastor thought it was a joke. Nope. The ring is at someone's house...

Maybe he was a standby groomsman.

FTW

[sushi]

My H lost his ring the day before we were supposed to travel to our wedding. I got a backup. This is what happens when people plan.

We brought the backup to my cousin's wedding, too

[pixy0stix]

Apr 4, 2014 19:42:12 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

Attention! I just got off the phone with NitaX her phone was dying but here is the report: They got to the reception and there was no place to sit because all of your cousins DID NOT RSVP but they showed up anyway. Nita knew the wedding coordinator who told her to sit at the reserved table for parents. Next Nita and her husband slid out the door, in silence, like real G's. They have now arrived at PF Changs to dinner. I briefly spoke t Mr. Nitaw who had me in stitches. I was instructed to pass along this information. She also repeated the Pastors confusion at the missing ring......

This is amazing. I would bet money the people who showed up were on the standby list and were confused about whether or not they were invited to the reception.

[iammalcolmx]

Apr 4, 2014 19:54:34 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

Apr 4, 2014 19:42:12 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

Attention! I just got off the phone with NitaX her phone was dying but here is the report: They got to the reception and there was no place to sit because all of your cousins DID NOT RSVP but they showed up anyway. Nita knew the wedding coordinator who told her to sit at the reserved table for parents. Next Nita and her husband slid out the door, in silence, like real G's. They have now arrived at PF Changs to dinner. I briefly spoke t Mr. Nitaw who had me in stitches. I was instructed to pass along this information. She also repeated the Pastors confusion at the missing ring......

This is amazing. I would bet money the people who showed up were on the standby list and were confused about whether or not they were invited to the reception.

My money is on them being classless , not RSVPing, but showing up anyway.

[eponinepontmercy]

Apr 4, 2014 19:42:12 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

Attention! I just got off the phone with NitaX her phone was dying but here is the report: They got to the reception and there was no place to sit because all of your cousins DID NOT RSVP but they showed up anyway. Nita knew the wedding coordinator who told her to sit at the reserved table for parents. Next Nita and her husband slid out the door, in silence, like real G's. They have now arrived at PF Changs to dinner. I briefly spoke t Mr. Nitaw who had me in stitches. I was instructed to pass along this information. She also repeated the Pastors confusion at the missing ring......

OMG.


Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

[anastasia517]

Apr 4, 2014 19:17:43 GMT -5 @helenabonhamcarter said:

Apr 4, 2014 18:57:31 GMT -5 @dontcallmeshirley1 said:

I can see it now. "Nobody go anywhere, I'll be back in twenty. Ron! RON!! Toss me your keys, man!"

I was late getting married because my husband left the ring back at a hotel 45 minutes away. He left to go get it and then someone told me what happened. He also left the marriage license. This is why there are a million and one pictures of me at my own wedding and about 20 of my husband.

I don't know why these fools didn't just go ahead with the wedding as scheduled. We could have come back to the wedding lady the next day with the license, no biggie.

I know somebody who thought they lost their [$146] marriage licence and, after a mad search, found it in the recycling bin.

[Velar Fricative]

I hope they're sitting and having a grand old time with all the other standby wedding guests at PF Chang's.

[Deleted]

WOW. Love the updated report via Malcolm hahaha

[sushi]

I may be from a full on wasp family, but I served people drinks on the beach (illegally) during my ceremony. Not all us wasps are funsuckers!

[andrealynn]

Apr 4, 2014 20:32:31 GMT -5 sushi said:

I may be from a full on wasp family, but I served people drinks on the beach (illegally) during my ceremony. Not all us wasps are funsuckers!

Well, yeah, liquor is like oxygen to a wasp.

But they usually don't standby invite people to their weddings

[secretlyevil]

This is great!

[laurenpetro]

Apr 4, 2014 19:42:12 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

Attention! I just got off the phone with NitaX her phone was dying but here is the report: They got to the reception and there was no place to sit because all of your cousins DID NOT RSVP but they showed up anyway. Nita knew the wedding coordinator who told her to sit at the reserved table for parents. Next Nita and her husband slid out the door, in silence, like real G's. They have now arrived at PF Changs to dinner. I briefly spoke t Mr. Nitaw who had me in stitches. I was instructed to pass along this information. She also repeated the Pastors confusion at the missing ring......

This is the best update in the history of the internet.
/gavel.

[NitaX]

Apr 4, 2014 18:08:46 GMT -5 @soudesafinado said:

Apr 4, 2014 17:49:21 GMT -5 NitaX said:

My phone will die because I forgot to charge it thanks to work being crazy.

But Trust, a full rundown will happen later.

Then you need to commandeer the husband's phone because this is a priority. I mean, really.

So, I was gonna ask for his phone, but that fool gone tell me to stop being 'ethnic' and live blogging this shit for ya'll.

[summer]

Did I ever tell y'all about the wedding I went to where there were 27 (I counted) bridesmaids and groomsmen, the church venue roof wasn't finished and it snowed some inside, and the reception area was only paid for 45 mins, so they gave us our pieces of cake in a napkin as we were lined up (yes, lined up) to leave? Good times.

[Deleted]

Apr 4, 2014 21:58:30 GMT -5 NitaX said:

Apr 4, 2014 18:08:46 GMT -5 @soudesafinado said:

Then you need to commandeer the husband's phone because this is a priority. I mean, really.

So, I was gonna ask for his phone, but that fool gone tell me to stop being 'ethnic' and live blogging this shit for ya'll.

I'm so sorry about the loss of your husband. We all know you were hanging out with us tonight and couldn't possibly have clocked him in the head and you have no idea how he got buried in the backyard either. I mean that's totally crazy.

[NitaX]

Alright folks - this is the rundown ...

I'm worried about arriving late because I had to get my nails and toes "did" to be peep-toe acceptable. My H gets there early and waits for me to show up. I get there 10 minutes before invite time.

We're outdoors and it's unseasonably cool since we had some hella storms roll in this morning. But, the evening turns out to be perfect skies for an outdoor wedding. BUT, the wedding starts 25 minutes after the invite time.

The ceremony was lovely UNTIL the best man forgot the damn ring. Like for real. This is my H looking at me: 



My H leans over and says: "Man you have one fucking job. One damn job. Hold the damn ring."

I'm like damn. That shit happened. For.Real. The best man is priceless though because everyone is like DUDE. W.T.A.F.

The pastor (actually our pastor because we go to church with these folks) is cool and keeps the ceremony rolling. 

So, the bride gets to her exchange of rings and holds that shit up like "SEE THIS MUTHAFUCKA! WE GOT OUR DAMN RING." Gollum would be proud. 

So, after the ceremony, we head to cocktail hour. Which is the one shit they get right - open bar. We run up on the H of one of the bridesmaids and start chatting about the missing ring. Then the pastor comes over and was like "Listen. I thought this was a joke, but the best man was all 'keep going pastor', so I was like HE FORGOT THE RING."

This is the pastor's face: 



So, the pastor is like: "Man listen. That dude gone be like I don't wanna go home because the bride was giving them the what for coming up that hill."

After we giggle it up, we head to the reception area. This shit is not gonna end well because I immediately assess, there ain't enough seats up in this bitch. My H is trying to introduce me to some people he knows and inside I'm like DUDE! I can't be talking to these folks because AIN'T NO SEATS IN THIS PLACE!!!!!!!!!!!11

Sure as my fro is big, I find we have no place to sit. I slide over to the coordinator and give her the dilemma. She proceeds to tel me that we can sit at a reserved table and they are gonna have to ask people that didn't RSVP to leave.



My H who is as equally as stoopid as I am says this:



Sure enough, the wedding coordinator announces that if you didn't RSVP that you are gonna need to get out of a seat. We are at the table with the kinfolks of the bride and they are all "You know Black folks don't RSVP." One family member is like "Hell, I'm just gonna go home then even though I did RSVP." 

A bridesmaid tips over to tell me that the problem is the bride's ratchet ass family members that didn't RSVP and just showed up. From the looks of the venue, the bride only accounted for a 50-60 guest list. Three tables were reserved for the bridal party and probably another 5-6 tables (seating 8) were set up.

My H is like "look, I want some PF Changs, and I ain't gotta be up in this right here" because well this is going on ...



We wait for the 1st dance kiss the bride and shake the groom's hand, and we bounced. 

And that is how my evening at the Standby Wedding went down. Dinner with my H was lovely. Our waiter was excellent, and we had a very nice laugh at all the Next Level Foolishness we saw.

[pixy0stix]

This is so much better than I thought it would be.

[NitaX]

Apr 4, 2014 19:56:20 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

Apr 4, 2014 19:54:34 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

This is amazing. I would bet money the people who showed up were on the standby list and were confused about whether or not they were invited to the reception.

My money is on them being classless , not RSVPing, but showing up anyway.

Winner. Oh and people showing up with kids. I'm that person who never assumes to bring kids. I get a sitter, because well I wanna drink free booze and not worry about my kids.

[NitaX]

Apr 4, 2014 22:45:59 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

This is so much better than I thought it would be.

I forgot the part where a wedding guest lets the bride borrow her ring so that she'd have SOMETHING for the exchange.