I truly feel like every poll results in everyone having sex 5x a week or some ridiculousness. My new problem is I don't feel I can answer once a week or 2-3 times a week. Why can I not pick 1.5! Special snowflake!!!
If you aren't giving 2.5 bjs per day, you're not trying hard enough.
I have not given a BJ in probably a year. Maybe more.
I truly feel like every poll results in everyone having sex 5x a week or some ridiculousness. My new problem is I don't feel I can answer once a week or 2-3 times a week. Why can I not pick 1.5! Special snowflake!!!
If you aren't giving 2.5 bjs per day, you're not trying hard enough.
Because they are so much fun why wouldn't you want to give them all the time! Just ask bliss. *hairflip*
I had a c/s and my vagina is not the same. It is definitely, uh, more spacious and I can't do certain sex positions anymore. Doggy style is very uncomfortable, bordering on painful.
Post by winecheery on Apr 18, 2014 22:04:01 GMT -5
The first time was not so bueno, but that was because I was 8 weeks pp and we didn't have lube. How's that for TMI?
It has only improved, and didn't take too long either, thankfully, and I feel the same or even better then before. Everything got nice and small up in there again. I'm very happy about this!
It was different each time. I could write a novel. I've talked before about how after DD3 there was a weird sew up job. I will say I had a much easier time Oing during actual sex after I gave birth. I am a horndog in general as long as DH hasn't peeved me off...guess all those years of being a virgin & not getting action paid off. Lol
Post by yellowbrkrd on Apr 18, 2014 22:55:29 GMT -5
It's totally different for me. I had a 3rd degree tear and I swear they should have stitched more toward the back. I definitely enjoy sex, but it's not the same.
I don't even know. I mean, I'm more apt to pee myself, but I don't know what that means?
I had a c/s after long labor and lots of pushing, so I feel like everything kind of got some stress.
Mostly what I'm taking away from this thread is that there are some people having as little sex as I am, and it makes me feel like less of a failure as a wife. Thank you for making this feel normal!
Post by ilikedonuts on Apr 18, 2014 22:57:58 GMT -5
Its definitely different now, but in a good way (does that sound weird?). DH is the one that pointed it out.
Unfortunately, I will never be able to pee again without having to do a little shake to make sure its all out since my urethra was so swollen from the tear that when it was stitched after DD1.... yeah... use your imagination.
I had a third degree tear and sex was pretty eh until I weaned. Now I finally feel back to normal though some positions are uncomfortable where my scar is. I do need to do some pelvic floor strengthening though in general.
Post by MadamePresident on Apr 18, 2014 23:11:30 GMT -5
My main problem is a lack of muscle control it comes sneezing without leaking a few drops. It's super annoying. I didn't have enough tearing to warrent stitches.
Post by waterchurch on Apr 18, 2014 23:34:16 GMT -5
It took a while to feel like things were back to normal. Like months. These days we only need lube half the time, which is progress. That was never an issue pre baby.
Post by greencrayon on Apr 19, 2014 1:01:49 GMT -5
What do the degrees of tearing mean? My doctor said 2nd degree. It was about an inch, inch and a quarter maybe, of that skin near the perineum. Is it size? Length? Location?
After dd1 (episiotomy) it took a while for things to return to normal (or approaching normal). After dd2 (1stitch) things still aren't the same 6mths down the line.
I bf'd this time and for sure I was too dry during that time. That has gone back to normal now. But muscle tone is not there. I do hope it returns, though I do need to be more attentive to my kegels...
I don't really feel like I have the same muscle strength anymore (episiotomy and 4 stitches), case in point, I pee when I cough. But dh recently made a comment about how it took a year to uh break me back in the way he likes and now another baby's on the way to ruin it again . So I guess he thinks it's back to normal.
Breastfeeding definitely made sex unpleasant and consequently uncommon. It got a lot better when we dropped to 2 sessions a day around a year.
After my first it hurt for a long time, but got better before the year mark. With 2 & 3 it was fine right away (well, 6wpp). It feels the same for me, and DH says it is the same, but I don't know that he'd really tell me I feel stretched out and roomy. Not sure I'd want to know either.
Things are different, but not necessarily bad-different. There is still some slight soreness depending on position, but we didn't even attempt sex until 13 weeks pp, so it wasn't bad at all once we did. H thinks it feels different, too, but again, not bad, and he can't really explain how.
What do the degrees of tearing mean? My doctor said 2nd degree. It was about an inch, inch and a quarter maybe, of that skin near the perineum. Is it size? Length? Location?
It is location. 1st degree: tears the skin in the vaginal tissues. Sometimes needs stitches. 2nd degree: tears through vaginal tissue and the perineum. Requires stitches. 3rd degree: tears through the vaginal tissue, perineum and back to the muscle surrounding the anus. 4th degree: tears everything, all the way through the anus and the rectum. Sometimes requires stitching in an operating room...eeekkkk.
Small expert on this after my only vaginal birth left me on the brink of a fourth degree tear. So many stitches they didn't count. I still have issues 11 and a half years later. I gladly accept c-sections after that craziness.