Hmmm. This reads to me that her sister went through a traumatic event, gained 25lbs, is now 'really chubby' and needs to stop complaining.
Not the same thing as being genuinely concerned about a seriously overweight family member. H and I are concerned about his Mom's weight. She is morbidly obese and has terrible trouble with her knees which makes it tough for her to exercise. As a result she struggles with walking, has very high blood pressure and it is a real health concern.
This doesn't read the same way at all.
Good for you for telling your family members and husband that they need to lose weight. If you came at it from a caring, supportive place. Weren't you just complaining that a family member brings up how skinny you are? Or was that someone else?
My mil has said things about me being thin. She is overweight, my H was also overweight for a long period of his life. She is completely unsupportive of his weight loss, and when he told her he hit the 30 lb mark, she looked the other way without saying anything.
But yes, she is totally awesome, and she ignores her grandson bc I'm a bitch! :/
God I'm so delighted not to be married to you. I'm starting to wonder if grandma has a point. Maybe she looked the other way to stop herself saying something really rude to you?
I am dying at 25lbs = really chubby and then Brew saying "she's fine at her weight/more power to her" yet she describes her as really chubby, as though that is the single worst thing in the world to be.
My mil has said things about me being thin. She is overweight, my H was also overweight for a long period of his life. She is completely unsupportive of his weight loss, and when he told her he hit the 30 lb mark, she looked the other way without saying anything.
But yes, she is totally awesome, and she ignores her grandson bc I'm a bitch! :/
God I'm so delighted not to be married to you. I'm starting to wonder if grandma has a point. Maybe she looked the other way to stop herself saying something really rude to you?
?
I wasn't there. Her son was proud of himself and said "mom, I've lost 30 pounds." She looked away.
Look I'm not saying she HAS to lose weight! I think that if she wanted to keep the weight and she was confident with it, great! I think she's beautiful, she's beautiful with 25 lbs or w/o. I'm just sad and frustrated at her complaining.
Please read or re-read TR 's response to you. You are completely missing the point.
It's not like I'm just frustrated and have been giving her attitude or anything. I'm listening to her and helping her, giving her recipes of what's easy to make for lunches and going on bike rides and things like that but I get tired of her saying the same things over again. And look I'm a real person, I'm not sure how you want me to prove that, I've already uploaded a picture in my AMA thread.
Thanks for telling us. A picture always proves when a poster is real.
Wasn't it a picture with the date on it? I would think that'd be fairly difficult to fake to continue the ruse of using someone else's shots. But maybe I don't know anything.
In any case, brewalexa I think you should just stop. You're not coming across as a very sympathetic person.
25lbs makes someone 'really chubby'? I am in BIG trouble.
Dude I'm screwed.
I was going to post something serious trying to explain the viscous cycle of eating until you hate yourself and then eating because you hate yourself to try to explain what the sister might be going through but since it might be MUD I'll pass.
But, it sounds like she's going on bike rides and at least trying to eat healthier (getting recipes from you, packing her lunch)? So maybe you should back off with your "frustration?"
I guess maybe what I'm more frustrated about is how she's going about losing the weight. She keeps doing these "diets" like the detox one where you drink lemon and pepper and maple syrup or whatever or the south beach diet, loses one lb and then complains about either gaining it back or not losing more. I keep telling her to lose it a healthy way so that its less likely to gain back and she says it's too hard that diets work better. Maybe I have misplaced frustration and thank you for helping me see that.
Google "cortisol". Stress can cause a person to gain weight.
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
Post by CajunShrimp on Jun 5, 2014 17:21:08 GMT -5
There are medical conditions that can cause painful sex for women. You should ask your doctor. I could see hating sex if it hurt. And the longer between times, the more it might hurt, so it is hard ti get out of that pattern.
It's not normal to have pain during sex. You really should make a Dr's appointment. I'm sorry wysiwyg.
It is okay, thank you though. I have endometriosis and that's why I have pain, so says my doctor. It is what it is, but I guess I am just missing out.
And your Dr didn't have any suggestions for you? I think that's unacceptable to be honest. Maybe try getting a second opinion? Someone has got to have a solution, you're not the only one to suffer from this condition.
Look I'm not saying she HAS to lose weight! I think that if she wanted to keep the weight and she was confident with it, great! I think she's beautiful, she's beautiful with 25 lbs or w/o. I'm just sad and frustrated at her complaining.
LOL. A beautiful 'really chubby' complainer. You sound so supportive. No really. You do.
She can't be chubby and beautiful? I'm only complaining about her complaining. I didn't think I was going to get support for thinking this way. I know it's not great of me to be frustrated at her. I just wish there were something I could do to help her so she wouldn't say things like I'm not going to the lake with our family because I'm too chubby for a swimsuit. It really does kill me because I love her and want her to be comfortable with herself. I just get so frustrated at her lack of motivation.
LOL. A beautiful 'really chubby' complainer. You sound so supportive. No really. You do.
She can't be chubby and beautiful? I'm only complaining about her complaining. I didn't think I was going to get support for thinking this way. I know it's not great of me to be frustrated at her. I just wish there were something I could do to help her so she wouldn't say things like I'm not going to the lake with our family because I'm too chubby for a swimsuit. It really does kill me because I love her and want her to be comfortable with herself. I just get so frustrated at her lack of motivation.
LOL. A beautiful 'really chubby' complainer. You sound so supportive. No really. You do.
She can't be chubby and beautiful? I'm only complaining about her complaining. I didn't think I was going to get support for thinking this way. I know it's not great of me to be frustrated at her. I just wish there were something I could do to help her so she wouldn't say things like I'm not going to the lake with our family because I'm too chubby for a swimsuit. It really does kill me because I love her and want her to be comfortable with herself. I just get so frustrated at her lack of motivation.
you look familar. Are you from Milwaukee area? Brewers fan?
It's not normal to have pain during sex. You really should make a Dr's appointment. I'm sorry wysiwyg.
It is okay, thank you though. I have endometriosis and that's why I have pain, so says my doctor. It is what it is, but I guess I am just missing out.
Would you have any interest in sex without the pain? If not, it's okay to just not be into sex. It's not the be all end all of human existence.
If you would be interested in it without the pain, I hope you can find a care team willing to give you an answer beyond "it is what it is". That's not okay. I wonder if this is something PT would help with or not, since it is more of an internal organs problem than a muscle problem, but I know PT can do wonders in lots of cases.
It is okay, thank you though. I have endometriosis and that's why I have pain, so says my doctor. It is what it is, but I guess I am just missing out.
And your Dr didn't have any suggestions for you? I think that's unacceptable to be honest. Maybe try getting a second opinion? Someone has got to have a solution, you're not the only one to suffer from this condition.
We have tried a lot. Putting me in a medicaly induced menopause for a few months is really the step left. I guess the other side of this confession is that I'm pretty much terrified to do that lol.
She can't be chubby and beautiful? I'm only complaining about her complaining. I didn't think I was going to get support for thinking this way. I know it's not great of me to be frustrated at her. I just wish there were something I could do to help her so she wouldn't say things like I'm not going to the lake with our family because I'm too chubby for a swimsuit. It really does kill me because I love her and want her to be comfortable with herself. I just get so frustrated at her lack of motivation.
Best movie ever!
I put this movie on for my dog when we leave the house. That is my flameful today.
LOL. A beautiful 'really chubby' complainer. You sound so supportive. No really. You do.
She can't be chubby and beautiful? I'm only complaining about her complaining. I didn't think I was going to get support for thinking this way. I know it's not great of me to be frustrated at her. I just wish there were something I could do to help her so she wouldn't say things like I'm not going to the lake with our family because I'm too chubby for a swimsuit. It really does kill me because I love her and want her to be comfortable with herself. I just get so frustrated at her lack of motivation.
You're not. Please just stop. Perhaps you really don't understand why NO ONE agrees that you're being supportive of your sister, but just stop trying to justify or explain.
It's not normal to have pain during sex. You really should make a Dr's appointment. I'm sorry wysiwyg.
It is okay, thank you though. I have endometriosis and that's why I have pain, so says my doctor. It is what it is, but I guess I am just missing out.
Me too, and I had dispareunia (pain during sex) too. Turns out I had a HUGE endometriomia. Once that was removed, my pain was almost completely gone. When was the last time you had an ultrasound?
Please don't accept this as normal. It can be treated.
And your Dr didn't have any suggestions for you? I think that's unacceptable to be honest. Maybe try getting a second opinion? Someone has got to have a solution, you're not the only one to suffer from this condition.
We have tried a lot. Putting me in a medicaly induced menopause for a few months is really the step left. I guess the other side of this confession is that I'm pretty much terrified to do that lol.
It is okay, thank you though. I have endometriosis and that's why I have pain, so says my doctor. It is what it is, but I guess I am just missing out.
This is gross, but reality, do you use a good amount of lube? Just go nuts on the lube and deep breathe to relax your pelvis/vag walls. Become the hallway for the hotdog. That's what I do. I'm sorry you hurt.
If you have lube recs, I will take them. I use numbing stuff right now and it does okayish at best.
Do you normally have sex without something supporting your butt? Try putting a pillow under your hips that he is angled downwards. I have a painful vagina as well and sex always hurt. My gyn told me "it is a muscle clenching issue, you need to relax" but I found out through trial and error that the pain was coming from the, uh, "roof" (lol) of my vagina and anything tilted upwards would really hurt.
And now you know way more about my vagina than you should.
It is okay, thank you though. I have endometriosis and that's why I have pain, so says my doctor. It is what it is, but I guess I am just missing out.
Would you have any interest in sex without the pain? If not, it's okay to just not be into sex. It's not the be all end all of human existence.
If you would be interested in it without the pain, I hope you can find a care team willing to give you an answer beyond "it is what it is". That's not okay. I wonder if this is something PT would help with or not, since it is more of an internal organs problem than a muscle problem, but I know PT can do wonders in lots of cases.
Hugs to you.
As gross as this is I can't imagine not having pain during sex. I really wouldn't know whether I'd be interested in it or not.