My parents always pay. I try to argue without success. I don't worry too much because they are pretty secure in their old age.
My in-laws never pay. We don't go to dinner with them anymore. It's not that I mind paying, but don't invite us to dinner and then expect us to pay for our dinner and yours, after you go all out and order the most expensive shit you can find. No joke. This happened the last two times they asked us to dinner. No bueno!
We alternate. My mom and I go out to eat together 2-3x per week and we switch out every other time or so. She tries to pay more since we're three people living on one income, but she's retired so doesn't always make sense to me
This is our setup too. We alternate. I SAH and my mom is a part-time college professor, so her, DS , and I go out to breakfast or lunch at least once a week. So we alternate who pays. If my parents, DH and I, and DS all going out to dinner, generally whoever did the inviting pays. But we rarely do that, taking 4.5 people out to dinner is expensive.
Post by mrsukyankee on Jul 1, 2014 15:51:56 GMT -5
If parents/in-laws invite us out, then they pay. If we invite them out, we pay. But sometimes we pay or they pay regardless. It really depends on the situation.
DH's parents and my dad always pick up the check, unless we absolutely insist on buying for their birthday or Mother's/Father's Day. They are in significantly better shape than we are financially and would feel awful if we paid.
My mom and step-dad almost always pick up the check, but we insist every now and then. We dine with them fairly often, and they babysit our kids a ton, so we just don't feel right letting them pick up the check every time.
With my MIL, we always pay since she is on a very fixed income.
With my parents, it depends. We live in different states and usually the one who is visiting pays, since we stay for free at each other homes and usually cook dinner in.
When we go out with my parents, they pay. When we go out with H's parents, they make us pay, and they alway pick fancier places. Pisses me off every time, but my H refuses to talk to them about it.
My parents are much wealthier than us so I don't feel bad about them paying.
My dad, his dad and his mom all pay for us. My mom will not (or she will pay for us one day and we have to pay the next, if she's with us multiple days) - she doesn't make a lot of money. Someday I hope we can pay - but we definitely can't afford it now (picking up the tab for the table).
My parents do not dine out. The thought of either of them (separated) and their responses to a check arriving makes me either laugh or shudder in horror. Legit, the last time I went somewhere paying was required with them was when we did the parents meet the parents lunch (and I insisted to then boyf/FI that we would cover the check and not let it be a thing). I just reminded him of this, he forgot it was even an issue.
ILs get offended if you offer. However, they very much appreciate being thanked for their company at a meal. (You don't acknowledge the $$, it's taboo)
My brain took forever to adjust to this treatment (who am I kidding, it is still novel).
We pay for FIL since his divorce. We bought him 4 meals last week and groceries for him only and just to "see" H asked FIL was going to buy him lunch the day he/FIL wanted to stop at FIL's Eagles Club to pay his dues. FIL says, "I am not buying you lunch." Very rudely. Ok then.