s/o Wedding horror stories. Put 'em here.

[Chuppathingy]

I found out when we got back from our honeymoon that my uncle had been trying to take bets on when DH and I would get divorced during the reception. His idea of a joke apparently.

[StrawberryBlondie]

I was at a wedding where the best man's speech said something about how he never thought the groom would find someone who could satisfy him as much as his right hand.

At another wedding, the only free alcohol was champagne. People started getting it by the bottle and drinking it straight from said bottle. The bride's 16 year old sister got really drunk and started drunk dialing people from the middle of the dance floor.

Another wedding, the bride wore a dress that looked like a super trashy prom dress. The V-neck went practically to her belly button and the sides laced up. Several guests looked like they had serious cases of the meth bugs.

Oh, and the pastor at said wedding started the sermon talking about how both the bride & groom were sinners (her because she had been divorced, him because he had 3 kids out of wedlock with 3 different women) but God forgave them because they found each other and were getting married. I think he mentioned something about saving each other from Hell.

[StrawberryBlondie]

Oh, and at my own wedding, the date of one of my bridesmaids hit on 2 of my friends and the waitress and bartender at our rehearsal dinner.

[SmartyCat]

Not really a horror story, but we replay this moment on our wedding CD to hear the guests' laughter during the vows:

Pastor: ". . . . your loving and faithful husband. . ."
DH (a bit nervous that day) "your loving . . . long pause . . . husband."
Pastor: "your loving AND FAITHFUL husband"

[mallykat]

May 15, 2012 22:00:43 GMT -5 doctorwho said:

Our photographers were a married couple. A few months before the wedding, he was doing a side job hanging awnings and fell. He nearly died of massive head trauma. This resulted in a huge personality shift, and by the time our wedding rolled around things had deteriorated. She threw him out (or he left, I was unclear) the night before our wedding. Now this poor woman has to round up another photographer on almost no notice. She did, and not only did he do a great job but he wore the kilt we rented for her husband. It was clear from the photos, however, that she was in no condition to be shooting a wedding.

We have pictures, but we don't have a really good picture of just us. Like, it was hard to find something suitable for ty notes. The pictures of me with my parents have no regard for background. There's a garbage can and the cluttered counter behind a decent picture. I have a tendency to squint on one side, and she never retook any pics where that happened, so I had to copy and flip my right eye and superimpose it over my left. And I had to cut my sisters head off in one picture and put it on another.

[mallykat]

Why the shart would you want your photographer in a kilt? Photographers need to be fairly mobile.

[Ruby Gloom]

The day before our rehearsal dinner, the restaurant my ILs had reserved 2mos. prior cancelled, citing a reservation mixup. She had also confirmed this reservation just 3 days before.

I had taken my dress to the cleaners to be steamed and pressed the week before the wedding, with the tie to the corset back pinned to the hanger. I specified that the tie needed to be pressed. It was finally finished the Thursday prior to our Saturday wedding and I hung it and spread the train out as directed. When I got dressed at our ceremony I discovered the cleaners had not sent the tie with my dress and I had no way to close my dress. I had to send my mom to Walmart to buy 1/2" ribbon and I stood in the proshop of our golfcourse with my dress spread around me waiting for my mom to return from Walmart. Did I mention that, even though we got married in October, it was an unseasonably warm 80 degrees that week, so the golfcourse that was supposed to be closed to golfers at this point had reopened and they and my guests were all walking in and out of the now-open proshop (that was supposed to be closed) while I'm standing there, holding my dress to my boobs, with my dress open to my asscrack.

Obviously we started late, did not get the pre-ceremony pictures we had planned, and it is obvious our photos are rushed.

Those are the highlights.

[doctorwho]

May 15, 2012 22:32:29 GMT -5 mallykat said:

Why the shart would you want your photographer in a kilt? Photographers need to be fairly mobile.

Why wouldn't he be mobile in a kilt? We wanted as many people in kilts as we could get. We're kilt fans. DH has worn his to a few weddings.