I'm feeling a little bit on an island here. I think I need a support group for my pregnancy induced type A-ness.
What are you not chill about that others are? Remember that article about the lady who left her 3 year old in the car and someone pressed charges against her? My FB feed blew up with support for the mom, and when I said I know it was overkill but I thought it was a poor decision to leave a 3 year old in the car I got flamed with a thousand "just you wait" scathing comments.
I am also clearly not chill about any food because of DS's allergies. And germs because I am so tired of constant sickness in our house. Oh well. Anyone else? Bueller?
Sleep. I've discovered that I'm really really not breezy about it compared to others. I'm really talking about my older boys, they're still in bed by 9/930 at the very latest even though it's summer time. During school they're in bed by 8 at the latest (usually more like 730 or so). Based on their friends, I'm the most uncool mom ever. I'm pretty non-breezy about food too, but that's because they have Celiac.
Post by cinnamoncox on Jul 10, 2014 15:17:49 GMT -5
I can't think of much that I'm chill/breezy about as a parent.
I'm strict about bedtimes, bath and bath time, artificial sugar (I don't mind actual sugar as much), who I will leave them with (very few people and for short periods of time), etc.
I do my best to not let my anxieties be passed on to them, I have dh to balance me out a bit, I trust him enough to let me know when I'm being overly protective of them based on my anxiety vs true risk. On the flip side, he knows that when I did my heels in about something, it's not negotiable at that point.
Post by pierogigirl on Jul 10, 2014 15:25:27 GMT -5
I'm not very breezy. Examples of things about which I'm not breezy: sleep, car safety, water safety, making sure they are always being supervised by me or DH when we are outside (or at parties, playdates, etc), selecting daycare.
I've relaxed a bit on tv. I shoot for a balanced diet, but we don't do all organic all the time and they definitely eat goldfish!
I don't care if they get dirty while playing outside. There! I'm breezy about something!
ETA: more non-breezy thing(s): sunscreen, helmet use with wheeled toys, vaccines
I'm pretty breezy. The only thing I am not breezy about is who can babysit DD. I trust my mom completely, and my sister in certain conditions, but that's it. My hope is that when DD is completely verbal I will open babysitting up to DH's family.
I am crazy about sleep. I know other people roll my eyes at me but idgaf. I did not go through a year of sleep deprevation for nothing. We found what works and he is not flexible. Too bad! I used to be even worse that is the sad part lol.
Vaccines and proper car seat use age are my other non breezy issues.
Surpringly I am not crazy about food. I thought I would be but eh. He gets what he needs, is healthy and happy.
Post by badtzmaru22 on Jul 10, 2014 15:39:47 GMT -5
Not breezy about SIDS risks/potential SIDS risks. I wouldn't use the newborn napper on the pack n play, and I won't use a rock n play at all bc I think they are too plush. DD wore only sleep sacks well past a year. I forget when we eventually gave her a blanket. No loveys or anything though, at first. No bumpers of any kind. I was a little insane about it, but when I was in high school, our neighbors across the street had a baby die of SIDS, and I used to babysit for her (not when she died). It really hit me hard.
Bedtime - the boy across the street just turned 2, and he is always outside playing at 9pm, 9:30pm. No.
This really bugs me. Just because a child is up late, it doesn't mean they are not getting enough sleep. Why do you care why time he goes to bed? Perhaps he naps late or wakes up late. Although, I never sleep trained my kids, I did read Ferber. He wrote that routine and consistency is more important than time.
Edited to add. It is fine that you are not breezy about bedtime for your kid, but you are making the assumption that his parent is breezy about bedtime, and that is quite possibly not the case. Obviously this is a hot button issue for me.
Post by game blouses on Jul 10, 2014 15:51:31 GMT -5
I'm not breezy about schedule. Both kids need to sleep and eat at the same times every day, especially bedtime. I get irrationally irritated when people show up at my house later than expected (like, more than an hour) and think they can still play with the kids for hours. IT'S NAPTIME NOW.
Bedtime - the boy across the street just turned 2, and he is always outside playing at 9pm, 9:30pm. No.
This really bugs me. Just because a child is up late, it doesn't mean they are not getting enough sleep. Why do you care why time he goes to bed? Perhaps he naps late or wakes up late. Although, I never sleep trained my kids, I did read Ferber. He wrote that routine and consistency is more important than time.Â
If you were nearby I would be happy to meet you for a 9pm play date .
Bedtime - the boy across the street just turned 2, and he is always outside playing at 9pm, 9:30pm. No.
This really bugs me. Just because a child is up late, it doesn't mean they are not getting enough sleep. Why do you care why time he goes to bed? Perhaps he naps late or wakes up late. Although, I never sleep trained my kids, I did read Ferber. He wrote that routine and consistency is more important than time.
Edited to add. It is fine that you are not breezy about bedtime for your kid, but you are making the assumption that his parent is breezy about bedtime, and that is quite possibly not the case. Obviously this is a hot button issue for me.
I do assume it is a little lax in his house. He is often alone out in the yard, and his dad was taken away in a police car a few weeks ago because he refused to leave and was threatening with a knife.
I would be super annoyed if my kid was up that late. 10pm is my bedtime, and I need some time to myself before I go to bed.
I never sleep trained my child (although I would have if he didn't STTN on his own). It seems like most of us with toddlers are doing 7-8 pm though. To each her own.
Food and eating had (have?) me stressing. First I was like, omg she's going to choke. Then I was like omg, her diet isn't healthy enough. Now I'm like omg, how long can she live on pineapples and air???
I am trying very hard to remember that she controls what goes in and what comes out and that my only responsibility is to offer, offer, offer.
Of what's been mentioned, vaccines, who I leave my kids with and how long before I left them at all, car seat safety (I know DH is scratching his head because I am being a total crazy person about a seat when we're in Germany in two weeks).
I don't let my kids have fake sugar but an also totally fine with real sugar in moderation. My inlaws think I'm over the top because I don't regularly give them juice, normal level of non-breeziness on MMM, but I'm a freak in my day to day life. If we're at a party or something, fine, the older two can have a Capri sun, but I don't ever buy it. They eat a ton of fruit, no need and they have zero clue what they're missing. Same thing with soda, but DH and I don't really drink it at all either. My inlaws are used to giving it to my 6 yo nephew. Ice cream and Popsicles are treats, not every day.
I am not relaxed with baby proofing at all. Everything, and I mean everything, is bolted to the wall. Five gates on the first floor alone.
I have an insurance background, DH is an engineer and was raised by a fire fighter. We have eleventy billion smoke/carbon monoxide detectors and several fire extinguishers on every floor. And a central station alarm system. And lots of insurance on everything.
I'm relaxed about tv time but they haven't been exposed to the iPad or our phones really at all.
Def non breezy about who watches DS, and a lot more I can't even think of right now. I wish he had a sleep schedule routine down that I could be non breezy about. We are working on it
Not breezy about food due to food allergies, SIDS risks (H more than me even. J was over 18Mo and he was still worried about him having anything in the crib with him like a blanket or lovey), car seat safety. We are pretty not breezy about sleep either. Bedtime routine starts between 630 and 7 for all three every night with very, very few exceptions.
I'm honestly not sure yet where I fall on the breezy spectrum. Some stuff I thought I would be super breezy about but I don't think I am (i.e. germs - I keep wanting to take her to gym daycare and then chickening out because I don't want my baybeeeee to catch a cold!). So perhaps I am non-breezy? IDK.
Post by everafter07 on Jul 10, 2014 17:37:45 GMT -5
Bed and nap times. These are when We/I get a break, so we do everything in our power to make sure she's in bed by the 2-3-4 schedule. (Nap after 2 hours up, then nap after 3 hours up, then bed by 4 hours up.) A few family members give us a hard time about this, but they can SUCK.IT. They don't have to deal with the hot mess that DD will be.
Baby led weaning. We are too scared. Cut up in tiny pieces til she's 12, FTW!
Kids touching her. We are ok with it, so long as they're clean. Our nephew tried to touch her face immediately after coming off a public playground. Newp.
Let me count the ways. . .definitely about sleep, we've always kept to a pretty strict nap and bedtime routine for all of the girls, it has helped us manage the day and as pp said, when bedtime comes around we're both done and need that time to ourselves.
As far as food, sugar, juice, and treats in moderation, making sure that foods are cut (choking is one of my biggest fears even for DD1 who is 6). It's hard to also trust anyone else to watch the girls, though it's more DH than me and we've only had MIL or my parents watch them maybe a handful of times? Part of that is distance though.