Honestly, mostly I just think that you seem WAY more down to earth than some other GBCN posters who have lots (but likely less) money than you…I mean, I don't give a shit how people spend their money, you just seem more 'with it' in terms of how the rest of the world lives in the same world as those of you who are rolling in it, which is refreshing.
Thank you! I sound like a broken record, but I'm really just painfully normal. Married my high school sweetheart, most of my closest friends are still from my normal childhood in the burbs. I see them struggle to save and plan and worry and I just never want to be out of touch with that, because that is real life and those are my people.
Honestly, mostly I just think that you seem WAY more down to earth than some other GBCN posters who have lots (but likely less) money than you…I mean, I don't give a shit how people spend their money, you just seem more 'with it' in terms of how the rest of the world lives in the same world as those of you who are rolling in it, which is refreshing.
Thank you! I sound like a broken record, but I'm really just painfully normal. Married my high school sweetheart, most of my closest friends are still from my normal childhood in the burbs. I see them struggle to save and plan and worry and I just never want to be out of touch with that, because that is real life and those are my people.
That's the thing right, it's fine that you have money, awesome in fact. It just gets exhausting to listen to some people with money who either have never had to survive with less, or who have forgotten.
Yes, then submit to their insurance in an attempt to receive the standard out of network reimbursement rate.
You choose that because of the level of service. Immediately returned phone calls, smaller practices (read: fewer patients), more one-on-one time with your doctor. My OB and pedi don't accept insurance-- but my OB is my friend, so that is a different setup. I chose my pedi after interviewing so many and he was just the one I clicked with the most, and he happened to practice two blocks from our old apartment. It sucks that he doesn't accept insurance, but he's been an invaluable resource for me, so no regrets.
Yes this is totally a thing now. Some docs are just frustrated with insurance companies and some just cater to higher end clients. See:
My friend who is in this industry was just extremely frustrated fighting with insurance. She constantly felt like she wasn't giving her patients the exact care she wanted to, so she just said "fuck it" and went off the grid.
She's more popular than ever. And she is WORTH IT.
But the marathon story where you tell him you are pregnant is my favorite. That was so cute. Not everything about a marathon can be bad if it made that story.
I understand what you are saying though. I am married to a workaholic who also wants to have activities. His is golf.
I found out I was pregnant two days before the marathon a few years ago. I didn't want to psych H out before the big day, so I kept my mouth shut. I met him right after the finish line and held up a sign that said "My DADDY runs marathons. Baby 212, ETA July 2012." It was amazing to see a completely exhausted man LEAP off the ground and scream amongst the rest of the walking dead marathoners.
I found out I was pregnant two days before the marathon a few years ago. I didn't want to psych H out before the big day, so I kept my mouth shut. I met him right after the finish line and held up a sign that said "My DADDY runs marathons. Baby 212, ETA July 2012." It was amazing to see a completely exhausted man LEAP off the ground and scream amongst the rest of the walking dead marathoners.
I missed this thread! You two sound so freaking adorable
I remember trying to help you pick out stuff for the nursery in a thread on here. I never got to see the final product, I would love to if you share again.
And stop by and visit me next time you are in Boston. The boys started preschool 3x a week so I have some free time
I missed this thread! You two sound so freaking adorable
I remember trying to help you pick out stuff for the nursery in a thread on here. I never got to see the final product, I would love to if you share again.
And stop by and visit me next time you are in Boston. The boys started preschool 3x a week so I have some free time
Sorry! I left it up for 24hrs, but you know, mom lyfe gets in the way of all the fun.
You did! Tons of great ideas. Still working on it, but I promise to post pictures and tag you when it's done. And I will, I promise. I still get my hair-dids and my sister is in school so I'm there a lot!
I found out I was pregnant two days before the marathon a few years ago. I didn't want to psych H out before the big day, so I kept my mouth shut. I met him right after the finish line and held up a sign that said "My DADDY runs marathons. Baby 212, ETA July 2012." It was amazing to see a completely exhausted man LEAP off the ground and scream amongst the rest of the walking dead marathoners.
Great memory.
Hell, I have heard this story before and this made me tear up.
Holy shitballs, I'm waaaay late to this thread. Thanks, 212, this is super fascinating!
Here are my questions: - do you have a vacation house/ are you interested in one? I'd be happy to give a guided tour of Montana, if you're ever in the area :-)
- are you involved in/ supportive of any charities?
Holy shitballs, I'm waaaay late to this thread. Thanks, 212, this is super fascinating!
Here are my questions: - do you have a vacation house/ are you interested in one? I'd be happy to give a guided tour of Montana, if you're ever in the area :-)
- are you involved in/ supportive of any charities?
No vacation house. We'll probably inherit H's parents house in a beach town and it needs a ton of work. So that will be a huge project. I've never been to Montana, but it's one of my dad's favorite states! He says its gorgeous and the people are so friendly.
Yes. Big supporters of Planned Parenthood. Big Obama supporters, we'll definitely donate to Hillary if she runs. And then H donates 1 day/week of his time every summer to a small (but growing!) organization that brings underpriviledged but gifted students and houses them in dorms for the summer for college prep.
Basically we're liberal wingnuts with a very soft spot for education and women's rights. We never vote fiscally.
Holy shitballs, I'm waaaay late to this thread. Thanks, 212, this is super fascinating!
Here are my questions: - do you have a vacation house/ are you interested in one? I'd be happy to give a guided tour of Montana, if you're ever in the area :-)
- are you involved in/ supportive of any charities?
No vacation house. We'll probably inherit H's parents house in a beach town and it needs a ton of work. So that will be a huge project. I've never been to Montana, but it's one of my dad's favorite states! He says its gorgeous and the people are so friendly.
Yes. Big supporters of Planned Parenthood. Big Obama supporters, we'll definitely donate to Hillary if she runs. And then H donates 1 day/week of his time every summer to a small (but growing!) organization that brings underpriviledged but gifted students and houses them in dorms for the summer for college prep..
Basically we're liberal wingnuts with a very soft spot for education and women's rights. We never vote fiscally.
Would your H be able to telecommute from MT? It's a purple state and I'm actively recruiting liberals to import! My airport has a direct flight to NYC!
No vacation house. We'll probably inherit H's parents house in a beach town and it needs a ton of work. So that will be a huge project. I've never been to Montana, but it's one of my dad's favorite states! He says its gorgeous and the people are so friendly.
Yes. Big supporters of Planned Parenthood. Big Obama supporters, we'll definitely donate to Hillary if she runs. And then H donates 1 day/week of his time every summer to a small (but growing!) organization that brings underpriviledged but gifted students and houses them in dorms for the summer for college prep.
Basically we're liberal wingnuts with a very soft spot for education and women's rights. We never vote fiscally.
Would your H be able to telecommute from MT? It's a purple state and I'm actively recruiting liberals to import! My airport has a direct flight to NYC!
We talk about the possibility of telecommuting all the time!
I'm not perfect. I definitely have moments of extreme frustration-- but those typically come during times he says he's free, then changes his plans last minute. Or on the rare occasion that we get to eat dinner at a normal hour and he takes a phone call. We bicker about it sometimes, but honestly, we've been together for 14 years. I knew when we spoke of having children that I'd be largely solo-parenting. I've lived this life for a long time. It's not normal, but it's my normal, you know? If he was suddenly around all the time it would be a major adjustment because we're both so accustomed to this life. Like I said, the coming years and the possibility of more children may change things. He is really, really taken with our son in a way that I didn't... expect? If anyone can get him to slow down, it's that kid.
The marathon is a different beast. I hate it and I'm most snippy around this time of year when training and work are just insane. He knows this, which makes it even more frustrating when year after year, he ignores my pleas. But objectively, he really needs it. It's his mental break, his release, his bottle of wine and trashy tv. So I try to not be a total asshole about it. But man, it is so fucking hard.
I'd kill my husband LOL.
Do you or he worry about your kiddo resenting his dad being gone so much when he gets older? It's interesting to hear you describe him as really taken with your son but then voluntarily spend so much time away on a hobby on top of his crazy work schedule. I think I'd be able to come to grips with solo parenting for the most part (in terms of what it would mean for my own life) but I don't know I could "get over" what it means for the kids. I don't know if that makes any sense.
Nope, makes perfect sense.
I don't expect him to work like this forever. Could he? Yes, and then I'd start to worry. But I really think the more interactive our kid gets, the more he misses him, and that might translate into action. Small example. In the past when he'd have a cancellation, he'd immediately rebook the time slot with another client. Now, he runs home (we live really close to his work for this reason) or meets us at baby class or takes us out to lunch, etc. When the baby was just a blob who smiled and shit, he'd have never done this. But the two boys are obsessed with each other, and they have their "things" that I'm not invited to or involved with. Of course this isn't a daily or sometimes even weekly thing, but it's a subtle shift within H. Here's to hoping it continues...
Do you or he worry about your kiddo resenting his dad being gone so much when he gets older? It's interesting to hear you describe him as really taken with your son but then voluntarily spend so much time away on a hobby on top of his crazy work schedule. I think I'd be able to come to grips with solo parenting for the most part (in terms of what it would mean for my own life) but I don't know I could "get over" what it means for the kids. I don't know if that makes any sense.
Nope, makes perfect sense.
I don't expect him to work like this forever. Could he? Yes, and then I'd start to worry. But I really think the more interactive our kid gets, the more he misses him, and that might translate into action. Small example. In the past when he'd have a cancellation, he'd immediately rebook the time slot with another client. Now, he runs home (we live really close to his work for this reason) or meets us at baby class or takes us out to lunch, etc. When the baby was just a blob who smiled and shit, he'd have never done this. But the two boys are obsessed with each other, and they have their "things" that I'm not invited to or involved with. Of course this isn't a daily or sometimes even weekly thing, but it's a subtle shift within H. Here's to hoping it continues...
I'm on another board but enjoyed reading this. Thank you for sharing
My dad works like your H (different industry, though). I don't resent him at all. He made sure that the time we had together counted. I have very fond memories of roller skating and reading with him when he was home. He's around for my kids quite a bit now because he was able to retire at 50 (but got bored and went back to work and is now retiring again at 55). My family has also enjoyed a lot of lifestyle benefits thanks to how hard he works (and how much solo parenting my mom did--he couldn't do his job without her running his life).
Sounds like your H is just as awesome with your son.
OK, I'm calling it. Your H is a super human. Dang! He is definitely a driven, focused guy. I love that he loves what he does and clearly works very hard. It sounds like you are incredibly supportive of him, too. Cheers to you both, and I mean that with all sincerity.
I try. But between you and me and an entire message board of strangers, fuck the marathon. It's hard to watch him walk out the door to train, but I know it's what he needs. But fuck. Sucks.
Awwwwwwwww. I'm a marathon training widow, too. I haven't seen my DH on a Saturday morning in nearly 3 years, except for the odd occasion. It's hard to deal with DS for like 10 extra hours a week, solo, because DH is putting so much time in to his 'hobby', but it realllllllllly keeps him sane. I do not like DH too much when he isn't getting that stress outlet. Plus it's good for his health. Blah blah blah. I need to find a hobby where I can leave DS with DH for a few hours a week, too.
DH is trying to do Chicago in Oct in under 3 hours. If he stays on track and the weather remains cool (it's supposed to be in like 40's when the race starts) I bet he makes it. It's his BQ.