"This prick is asking for someone here to bring him to task Somebody give me some dirt on this vacuous mass so we can at last unmask him I'll pull the trigger on it, someone load the gun and cock it While we were all watching, he got Washington in his pocket."
Post by anastasia517 on Aug 15, 2015 19:37:22 GMT -5
After all these stories, I have finally figured out the benefit to having parents who disliked each other & argued all the time but stayed married "for the kids": no sex noises, no walking in on them, and no post-divorce booty calls.
I still like to pretend they only had sex to conceive my sister and I, although I know it took more than a year and a half for them to get pregnant with me. (Because duh, it's hard to conceive when you aren't having sex.)
I walked in on my mom and step-dad. I probably do need therapy just for that.
I also walked in on my mom and dad when I was 9 or so. Just in time to see dad putting on a condom. Of course, I didn't know what was happening at the time, it was just on reflection (and after finding his condom stash) that I realized what I'd seen. Also, when I got old enough to understand what the sounds coming from their room were......ew.
LAWD. You have GOTSTA be more carfeul. Why y'all ain't lock the door? Nae just busts in our room like she is the police. Before I start stripping, I always ask my H - DID YOU LOCK THE DOOR? LOCK THA DOOR PLAYA!
I might have you beat...when I was about 17, me and my now DH were doing exactly that EXCEPT WE WERE TOTALLY NEKKID and HIS MOM WALKED IN ON US. Right before family dinner, complete with relatives. Kill me. Kill me now. That was about 15 years ago and I still cringe thinking about it.
ETA: we were young and stupid and didn't realize his family had arrived home whilst we were doing this. It was right after school, we thought we had a little bit of time, we were not just going to town while his parents and family were all up stairs.
LAWD. You have GOTSTA be more carfeul. Why y'all ain't lock the door? Nae just busts in our room like she is the police. Before I start stripping, I always ask my H - DID YOU LOCK THE DOOR? LOCK THA DOOR PLAYA!
Go to him tonight. Ask him what his bad dream was about last night. When he asks what you are talking about tell him he came to your room saying he had a bad dream. If he says, "Oh, when I saw you putting daddy's pee pee in your mouth?" You can say, "What!? That didn't happen. Oh is THAT what you dreamed about last night? You said something about me being a T-rex eating daddy's leg and I didn't understand but now I do. Don't worry honey that was just a bad dream. That would never happen."
I was 16 or 17 and walked in on my step-dad sitting on the kitchen counter, and my mom running her hand up his shorts.
I was mortified. They were too. I went to bed and didn't come out until the next day. We never spoke of it again... well until like 7 or 10 years later when I made fun of them for it.