If I lived my life constantly being the bigger person, I'd never make decisions that make me happy and I just can't imagine living my life for other people and not myself.
Related, lifelong Catholic with 13 years of Catholic school. No Catholic guilt here. I guess it missed me. My mom has always commented on that (probably because I'm not the 'bigger person' and just don't do what she says).
I think it all depends on how his mom is with this date. In my family, I'd be going even if I didn't feel like it. If his mom is indifferent, I'd skip.
She wants everyone to go, but she skipped out on my mom's funeral because she was "tired" that day so.. I have gone to this 11 times out of 13 years. This is year 14.
I was all ready to say that you can not skip it. But now after reading the above. Sleep
Mass with our one barely two year old is a two parent job. Even though we like to go weekly if H or I are not in town/can't go no one goes. The idea of you trying to wrangle two kids having a rough time outside to calm down by yourself is giving me hives for you.
Thanks for all the replies.. Today has been very stressful and busy getting everything in order after vacation. I still haven't made up my mind, but am leaning toward skipping. I am glad to see some were for skipping because I was feeling bad about it.
Regarding the two I missed... One I was out of town for work. The other she hadn't told us about until the night before and we were already doing a memorial trivia for a friend who passed away the February after his brother.
This would be the first missed for not a good reason.
Mass with our one barely two year old is a two parent job. Even though we like to go weekly if H or I are not in town/can't go no one goes. The idea of you trying to wrangle two kids having a rough time outside to calm down by yourself is giving me hives for you.
Yes.. This is also stressing me out just thinking about it.
In my situation, I wouldn't go. My MIL still treats me (& our kids, for that matter) as an add-on and not really a member of THEIR family...after 10 years of marriage and 2 kids. I wouldn't go out of my way to do that for her.
If my MIL was involved in our lives, helped us with childcare or other little things, & treated me like a member of the family, yes, I would suck it up and go.
My MIL treats me the same way. And is not very involved at all.
I'm generally in the "be the bigger person" camp, but that is pretty ridiculous.
I would send a card or offer to meet her for a kid friendly lunch or have her stop by your house after to try and be nice.
"Thank you for the invite but due to the late notice we won't be able to make it. H has work that he can't reschedule and the kids are a bit much to handle alone for an hour. We will light a candle in his honor at home."
"Thank you for the invite but due to the late notice we won't be able to make it. H has work that he can't reschedule and the kids are a bit much to handle alone for an hour. We will light a candle in his honor at home."
I wouldn't give this much detail. Your H should just say, "Sorry, we can't make it this year."
I think it all depends on how his mom is with this date. In my family, I'd be going even if I didn't feel like it. If his mom is indifferent, I'd skip.
She wants everyone to go, but she skipped out on my mom's funeral because she was "tired" that day so.. I have gone to this 11 times out of 13 years. This is year 14.
I was all set to say "be the bigger person."
Now I'm saying "Woke up with food poisoning, sooooorrrreeeeeee!"