How do you afford stuff as 2 separate people?

[momof2ms]

Looking at our finances I could pretty much take on the kids and me by myself so long as my we split the daycare/afterschool care - he'd still need to pay a bit under $500/month. He's dealing with major financial/budgeting issues and I'm too nervous that he just wouldn't end up paying that. I feel the need to be financially independent before us two physically split but even with a promotion that's not going to make up the difference. 

Anyone want to share their secrets for getting by without digging more holes? 

[glynn]

Can you work extra at your job or get something PT?? When I left my first XH I worked a lot of OT and made it just fine. You need to try to figure it out with his income because he may not be dependable(mine was not). Sorry.

I am trying to figure this out also....

[formerlyak]

I'd post your budget (just you and the kids) on MM and ask for help cutting back. You need to just figure it out. If you are anything like me, while your budget will be tight, it will seem easier to manage without him because you will have all the control. When ex moved out I got no child support and he didn't pay of any of daycare. I had to spend 75% of my take home on rent and daycare and still figured out how to make it work.

[riverpestie]

When my XH and I split up, I cut all my extras out. I cut cable, I cut my magazine subscriptions, I got a basic cell phone, I changed car insurance companies, I clipped coupons, etc...
We didn't have kids, but it was still tight for a while. I even got a second job for a few months.

[whatnext]

Both sit down and work out two budgets. Then look and ask do I really need this. It's amazing some of the crap you can pull out of a budget.

[redshoejune]

It was easier for me to budget without him and his "needs" that are not things I felt necessary. I also ended up spending less than I expected on food and utilities because I have more control.

It is really hard to go from a two income family to a one income family. Good luck, you can figure this out!

[cuddlyevil]

It's easier for me to budget without worrying about his tendency to pick up stuff we didn't need/can't afford because he wanted it.

[1confused1]

I would find a way where you don't have to rely on his money. And, get the financial stuff (child support, daycare, etc.) in a court order.

When we first separated and I was paying the mortgage on my own, I literally counted pennies. I cut out all the extra stuff, shopped at discount stores for food, found the cheapest places to buy staples (milk, eggs, etc.), stopped eating out, etc.

[frontbutt]

I got a side job that pays just enough for me to get by...but I know another person who is waiting tables because of a similar situation (this is after her 9-5) and she is much more stable.

I cancelled cable TV, netflix, downgraded my data plan, cancelled anything I could think of...starting selling my nicer purses on ebay

It was worth it to be free of him.

[lemons]

Mine's different because I'm a widow, but I put together a budget and cut things out til I could squeak by. I'm squeaking by now but by this time next year, I'll be debt free and then I can add back some of the things I cut out.

I second asking on MM because they are great with budgeting assistance!

[becwheat]

I had a second job for a little while and asked for help with Childcare from friends and family to work more hours.

After getting a better grip on my budget I knew where to cut back. Thrift stores, discount groceries, coupons and getting a forbearance or deferment for student loans for a while.