Dating-related FB question

[Serenity9]

Do you Facebook friend the guys you date? At what point? I've only been seeing a guy for a couple of weeks, but we were showing each other pictures from our Facebook pages last night, so we both know the other is on FB. But I would feel weird if things ended... it is still early after all. I rarely un-friend people; they have to do something pretty awful for me to un-friend. I just looked up his page, so I'll probably pop up on his "People You May Know" list now, so he'll know I was looking, right? I'm overthinking this now, right? LOL!

[Deleted]

The guy I'm dating now is the first guy I've dated who I've actually friended on Facebook. I think it we friended each other about 8 weeks because we wanted to tag each other. But I don't really think it's a big deal otherwise. I actually think you can save yourself a lot of strife at the beginning by keeping off of each other's social media.

[jellymankelly]

FI and I connected on FB really early within a week of our first date, but we spent a lot of time together that week, and things were different with him from day 1. I knew we'd end up friends even if we didn't date for a long time, so I was fine with connecting on FB. I've had other people try to friend me after meeting online, but prior to meeting in person, and that's just weird IMO. It seems like it's just a way to stalk your old pics and stuff prior to meeting.

[jigsy]

I don't understand the hesitation based on the unfriending. You can be friends then unfriend if/when it ends. It's not like there will be a huge "SERENITY UNFRIEND DUDE AND HE DIDN'T EVEN DO SOMETHING TOTAL AWFUL" announcement on your page.

Want to friend him? Then do it. No longer wish to see his shit? Unfriend. Why make something so trivial so complicated?

[calle28]

If you want to be his friend on FB, send a request. If it doesn't work out, you can easily un-friend.

[bl]

I have friended several guys I have dated and then either remained friends with them (this is the case for several of them, there were no hard feelings we just weren't meant to be in a relationship) or unfriended them later if things didn't work out. It really isn't a big deal, but I definitely won't friend until after a couple of dates.

[pinkdutchtulips]

I've only friended 1 in FB (BT) and he's never on ..

[Serenity9]

Nov 2, 2015 13:18:45 GMT -5 jigsy said:

I don't understand the hesitation based on the unfriending. You can be friends then unfriend if/when it ends. It's not like there will be a huge "SERENITY UNFRIEND DUDE AND HE DIDN'T EVEN DO SOMETHING TOTAL AWFUL" announcement on your page.

Want to friend him? Then do it. No longer wish to see his shit? Unfriend. Why make something so trivial so complicated?

LOL, because overthinking things is my stock-in-trade, apparently. I got called out for un-friending someone fairly recently. It was immature and ridiculous, but still not fun. I don't have a lot of upheaval in my social life, and starting dating again is bringing the upheaval. The answer to my question is stop over-thinking. Got it. 

[alleinesein]

FWB and I have "known" each other for almost a year (we started communicating online last november) and we still aren't FB friends. If things turn serious we might friend each other but for now there is not rush to do so from either of us.

[Wanderista]

FB friending is not a very big deal to me. I added a few guys when I was online dating that I might have talked with a few times and now I'm like, "Who the hell is that person?" but it's fine. One of those guys recently got engaged which I think is awesome. I love to see people being happy, but we probably chatted a few times in like 2008. I'm not bothered enough to unfriend him but I wouldn't lose any sleep over it.

Generally though, I only accepted people after we'd met in person and I liked them enough that if it didn't work out then I'd want to be friends or I'd basically care about their happiness. With this boyfriend, apparently we added each other in the month that we met. I did get weirded out by guys who wanted to add each other on FB before we'd met (unless we were just chatty and in the friendzone). I definitely got the vibe a few times that someone was wanting to spy on pictures and info before going out. I never agreed to that and found it creepy.

[Deleted]

A long time, honestly. My kid's photo is plastered all over my FB and I don't need someone new leaving comments on shit I'll have to delete eventually.