I swear, I'm trying to read/post more

[berbles]

I feel like I keep popping in, updating about me, and then disappearing again. How rude.



But here I am, giving you an update about me. Tell me about you, too!

Couple things going on 'round here, actually. This is gonna be a little long.

If you recall, XH I share custody of the dogs we owned together. Tweeter lives with him and Roxy lives with me. We had a 3rd dog together, but she escaped his yard shortly after we split and hasn't been seen in 2.5 years. Anyway, my sweet old man, Tweeter, has not been well lately. XH has been keeping me updated, but pretty much refused to take him to a vet, even though he was losing weight, dragging his back legs a lot, and couldn't keep his rocket in its pocket anymore. He called Saturday (Halloween) morning and said Tweeter hadn't eaten anything in 3 days and had been progressively lethargic. XH brought Tweeter over to my house and I knew for sure; today was his last. He was SO skinny, dramatically thinner than when I last spent time with him over July 4th weekend. And then I noticed his belly was very distended. Yeah, this was not something we could wait on. It was time to say goodbye. I had had Tweeter since December of 2001 (so he was at least 16 years old), when I found him running in the streets. I tried to see if he had any tags, which he didn't, but he didn't want me to touch him. After I got back in the car, he started chasing it. XH (BF at the time) opened the driver's door and this dog jumped into the car and sat right in my lap. He chose me, to say the least. Did I mention this happened the day before my 19th birthday? My little birthday dog. He gave me 14 years and I couldn't ask for more. I am positive his previous owners abused him (it took nearly 2 years before he didn't flinch any time I put my hand on his head, and he never liked his muzzle being touched), so I am confident that I gave him a better life for 14 years than wherever he came from (but I DID attempt to find his owners when I first found him. Looked for a chip, put in a found notice at local shelters, etc). I am happy I was able to say goodbye and be there with him in his final moments. I am forever grateful that XH and I get along well enough to be there together for Tweeter on his last day. Our former roommate came over before we went to the vet and got to say goodbye as well. He is at peace and I don't have to worry about him anymore. At 16+ years old, this wasn't a shock, but that doesn't make it easier. He will forever be a piece of my heart.
Roxy and Tweeter, last summer:


Happier news!
BF and I are moving in together! My parents are trying to put their house on the market, so I need to GTFO. We agreed that we wanted to live together, but were both very concerned about being able to afford a place that will allow all three of my pets. Remember, I live in one of the most expensive housing markets in the country. The average 1BR in my city runs about $2800. BF's current roommates are a married couple our age with two young boys (2 years and 9 months). The room BF currently rents is itty bitty. He barely fits in there. There's no way we could both live in that room. But they have 2 living rooms, and offered to convert the second one into a large bedroom for us, including putting in a sliding glass door to the back yard, and his-and-hers closets. Of course I would greatly prefer to not live with roommates, but it's just a reality in this area, and I'm SUPER grateful for their offer. Plus, their boys are the cutest and sweetest little kids. Truly. I lived with my niece for a year and, God love her, I would NEVER live with that kid again. She is a nightmare. These two boys are angels by comparison.

And speaking of childrens... I'm having my next round of eggs harvested/frozen soon. I'm getting the schedule set up next week. BF and I decided to have him fertilize this round before we freeze them.   Fertilized eggs survive the freezing/thawing process better than unfertilized eggs. We're definitely talking marriage, and it just makes sense. I do have 6 unfertilized eggs already, JIC. AND! We also decided to go ahead and have unprotected sex after my egg retrieval and just see if something sticks, without having to do a full IVF. I told my RE and she didn't seem totally horrified by the idea, lol. I think she was mostly surprised since he's not my husband. Well, I spent 12 years with my XH and was never as sure about having kids with him as I am with BF. So there.

And, a little AW. This was probably my most favorite Halloween costume ever. The Mad Hatter! BF was Daryl Dixon. (And YES, he cut all that damn hair off yesterday!)


Whew. Now what's up with all of you?!

[katieido]

Hey girl. I'm sorry about tweeter, that had to be so hard.

Re my divorce, custody/patenting time is squared away, still need to complete the financial portion. My attorney proposed bifurcation to expedite the divorce decree but we're getting resistance to this from his side. I just want this to be legal man!
I'm getting employed again! It looks like I may have two positions to choose from.

[berbles]

Nov 4, 2015 20:57:11 GMT -5 katieido said:

Hey girl. I'm sorry about tweeter, that had to be so hard.

Re my divorce, custody/patenting time is squared away, still need to complete the financial portion. My attorney proposed bifurcation to expedite the divorce decree but we're getting resistance to this from his side. I just want this to be legal man!
I'm getting employed again! It looks like I may have two positions to choose from.

What is bifurcation?

Options are nice! Are you staying where you are?

[abcdefu]

berbles I love your costume!! Sorry about your dog

[Deleted]

Hi berbles! Sorry about tweeter.  Glad things with you and BF are going well.  Since your parents are putting their house up, is there any chance they'd help you (financially) to get a place once they sell? Or would you be interested in their home? Are they relocating far away? 
This board has become so, so slow and empty over the past year.  It's just not what it was and I miss it. I (and others) do post over on ML--there's life over there! Lots of it.  

As as for me: BF and I are planning to relocate from NYC to N. Carolina as soon as we have jobs in place. We're currently searching (more so me because my job is more specific than his)  We ultimately decided that the cost of living here is too high for us to become homeowners and start a family. Nothing is keeping us here except for our jobs.  My mom will eventually sell her home here and permanently live in her house in S. Carolina. 

[MyName]

Great update, except I'm so sorry for your loss!

[jigsy]

Sorry about your poor Tweeter. It's so hard to lose a pet, even if they are older.
And that is some big BF news, congrats! Pretty much everyone I know who lives in N. California lives with at least 3 adults. It's crazy.

Update on me...I feel like you could read a post from last year and it would basically be the same, lol. But I'm pretty happy, so that is all that matters

[pinkdutchtulips]

Nov 4, 2015 21:29:38 GMT -5 berbles said:

Nov 4, 2015 20:57:11 GMT -5 katieido said:

Hey girl. I'm sorry about tweeter, that had to be so hard.

Re my divorce, custody/patenting time is squared away, still need to complete the financial portion. My attorney proposed bifurcation to expedite the divorce decree but we're getting resistance to this from his side. I just want this to be legal man!
I'm getting employed again! It looks like I may have two positions to choose from.

What is bifurcation?

Options are nice! Are you staying where you are?

undoing the marriage part -> martial status DONE prior to other issues being sorted out financial or custody 1confused1 might have had this ...

[berbles]

Nov 4, 2015 21:51:54 GMT -5 @blueyes623 said:

Hi berbles! Sorry about tweeter.  Glad things with you and BF are going well.  Since your parents are putting their house up, is there any chance they'd help you (financially) to get a place once they sell? Or would you be interested in their home? Are they relocating far away? 
This board has become so, so slow and empty over the past year.  It's just not what it was and I miss it. I (and others) do post over on ML--there's life over there! Lots of it.  

As as for me: BF and I are planning to relocate from NYC to N. Carolina as soon as we have jobs in place. We're currently searching (more so me because my job is more specific than his)  We ultimately decided that the cost of living here is too high for us to become homeowners and start a family. Nothing is keeping us here except for our jobs.  My mom will eventually sell her home here and permanently live in her house in S. Carolina. 

They're giving us money (first and last, essentially) to help get the construction started ASAP on our new room. They need the money from selling the house to buy a new RV, where they plan to spend a good chunk of their retirement, and a new house somewhere else. Plus, their house costs roughly $5-6k a month to run, not to mention $12k/year in property taxes. Newp. They want to move to the southwest.

[katieido]

pinkdutchtulips got it right, it would be to unlink the two components so i could be legally divorced right meow. we'd iron out the details later. since we've been separated for coming up on two years this spring, it's not as if our financial lives are still intertwined in practice.

both jobs are local. one is going back to my old job (contract) and the other is for a research NPO associated with a hospital downtown.

[Wanderista]

Doggie aside, I'm glad that you are mostly doing well, berbles. 

He reminds me a lot of a dog that I had growing up.

Glad to see you around. 

[berbles]

Nov 5, 2015 11:45:58 GMT -5 katieido said:

pinkdutchtulips got it right, it would be to unlink the two components so i could be legally divorced right meow. we'd iron out the details later. since we've been separated for coming up on two years this spring, it's not as if our financial lives are still intertwined in practice.

both jobs are local. one is going back to my old job (contract) and the other is for a research NPO associated with a hospital downtown.

Ugh, I can imagine that you just want it DONE with at this point. Is he dragging it out for a reason, or just being difficult to be difficult? I'm so so lucky that my divorce was super easy. Actually, I take that back. XH is SUPER lucky he wasn't an ass about anything. 

That's awesome that both options are local! I know you're closer to family where you are and that must make a lot of things easier. 

[dreamcrisp1]

I'm so sorry about your doggie!!!

[glitzyglow]

Good to hear from you Berbles! Sorry about the loss of your sweet pup.

[1confused1]

You're adorable! Sorry about the puppy!