Put your updates/current things here

[MyName]

Best of luck on the interview, @blueyes623! We should gtg before you move though!

I know I don't post here a lot, but I'll update anyway. I'm officially divorced, yay! But I guess that means I should start "really" dating now? I don't know...I'm not sure a romantic relationship is a priority for me yet. I'm sure it will be, but I cannot muster the effort to navigate dating sites when I could just hang out with friends or family...or by myself. lol

Quick aside: is dating a thing for people who neither want to get married again/have kids, nor want just hook up randomly? Should I put that caveat in online profiles to increase efficiency? Obviously I check those boxes, but should I be more up front? FTR, I'm almost 35, divorced after 12 years, and don't want kids ever.

[Deleted]

MyName don't feel any pressure to date. Do what makes you happy. As far as dating within those parameters, definitely! I want some exclusivity, but I don't think I ever want to be married again and a big no to kids for me. There are plenty of men who feel the dame

[Deleted]

As far as my updates, work is amazing and I'm loving the work from home totally flexible schedule. My chihuahuas are doing well despite Pacos medical issues. I've been dating A for three months now. That's so crazy to me, but it's going great. My friends have all met him and really like him. One friend told me "oh he just adores you." Swoon!

[Eureka1984]

I've been seeing my therapist and making progress on my anxieties!

I've been contemplating looking into moving out of FL. I'm looking into Dallas. I'm going to keep researching and digging deeper.

[bl]

@myname if you don't feel like dating then nothing says you "should". As far as the online profile I wouldn't make a big blinking sign statement on your profile, but check the boxes like you said and when they ask questions about those things be honest, I think there are plenty of guys who would feel the same.

@pdx18 so glad to hear things are going well with A.

Eureka1984 I moved to FL from Dallas and I adore Dallas. The job market is a million times better there and I found dating to be so much easier because there are 6 million people in the metroplex. For me FL is a better fit because I have a deep love for Harry Potter and the ocean that just can't be filled by Dallas, but if it weren't for those things I would have stayed or would move back.

I am actually datingish a guy in Dallas right now. It is somewhat complicated because he is my exbfs ex roommate and friend. There friendship has definitely changed and isn't that strong anymore (not because of me), but they do still talk. He is also 5 years younger and def doesn't have his shit together as well as I would like, however there are so many amazing qualities I can see in him and he is finally wanting to make changes for himself. I don't know that it will work long term, especially with the distance, but we are exploring it. No labels or anything, but we talk and video chat daily, might spend thanksgiving together, have a weekend in Dec planned and are planning a Vegas trip in Feb. I am giving it a few months to explore and then we can make a decision about where we want to go from there.

[lizard1131]

Nov 5, 2015 8:51:55 GMT -5 TR said:

Other: Working with a vet behaviorist on my dog's anxiety and random aggression issues, we're changing her meds and I'm hoping that helps. She can be such a sweet dog, but the unpredictability is worrisome. Come on, Prozac! lol

Have they tried trazodone?  Our anxious randomly aggressive dog was completely changed by adding her 'trazzies' to the prozac.  We haven't had an aggression incident in over a year.

[imalwaysme79]

I know I'm not around a lot, but here's my update anyway.

My first semester back at school has been good. A little stressful and a little overwhelming at times, but all things considering, I have an A and 2 Bs. I'm waiting for registration to open for Spring, I'll be taking 3 classes again.

We've been engaged for about 6 weeks, still feels weird to call him my fiancé, I think it will be even weirder to call him my husband.

My job search has been stagnant as I don't have much time to devote to it, but, I'm trying all the same.

[bg]

I'm still new/unknown, but...

My marriage is still in limbo. I'm giving DH time to work on himself and he is working very hard and he's come really far, but there are instances where his anxiety really comes through and has me questioning his progress. I really need to set a deadline for me.

School is moving along. I have less than four months until my dissertation defense date, which is crazy to think about.

Job prospects: none so far.

[gozf]

Things are generally good here!

I love my new job. It keeps me super busy, but in a good way. I'm learning a lot, and everyone seems pleased with me so far. I am really glad I made this move; I think this is a very good place for me.

I'm having landlord/rental property issues, and I'm furious about it. Long story short, we had a HUGE plumbing issue last spring that resulted in some lost property and a lot of grossness. Instead of actually fixing the problem, LL elected to put a bandaid on it. And it happened again. Not as major or gross this time, but more damage, more hassle, etc. And instead of hiring the proper contractors for the cleanup, he is bringing in a lady he knows with a cleaning business on the side. Who is only available on Wednesdays, which prolongs the process. I'm pissed. We really planned to stay in this rental until we had the funds for a downpayment to purchase a home. We love the location, and we get along well with our neighbors. But knowing that LL is so cheap and shady is bugging me, and I have no confidence in his ability to maintain this property anymore.

[brooke77]

New/infrequent poster =)

Life: Separated this summer and really settling into the single life. It's so strange because I haven't lived alone really ever. I like it. I have to admit I struggled way more than anticipated at first and I have breakdowns occasionally like this weekend when I was sooo hungover and I really just wanted someone, anyone, to get me a breakfast sandwich =)

Dating: I am not dating anyone. I haven't gone on a date. Umm. Yup. I do want to get married and have a family, someday. Not ready to put myself out there yet.

Divorce: Still at a standstill over finances/house/everything. Stressful.

[glynn]

My divorce is dragging out which I am unhappy about. H still won't leave even though he has a girlfriend for at least 5 months. I have meet a guy I might be interested in but I just can't get over that the fact that I am not divorced and H still lives at home. I have really pulled back from new guy because of my guilt. We only text and meet twice so it is not all involved yet. He would like a real relationship and I just don't want to be attached. He says he understand but I think really he thinks as soon as the divorce is done we will be a couple. I think I need at least 6 months before I am coupled with anyone.

Work is work.

My DS is coming home from oversea in January and I am excited about that. DD1 finally has not 1 but 2 hospital jobs which will set her up for when she graduates in May. DD2 finally got a good report from school and seems to be doing better. She currently takes 8 meds a day plus allergy shots twice a week... I hope to start when her off some of the meds for allergies in 4 months. The meds for her behavior stuff have leveled off so that is good.

[jojoandleo]

MyName-You do you. No one says you HAVE to date. I am pretty sure if H and I don't work out, I never want to be married again. In fact, I am not sure I ever want to really be in a relationship. I think I will just have my best friends and a few guys to have fun with.

My update: Marriage is still in limbo. It makes me so sad because I feel like our marriage was great for the first three years. We had a bit of a rough patch in year 4, but were FINE, and then year five has been like nothing but heartache. I could easily blame it all on H being depressed, but I know it's more than that. I just don't know how to fix it. And I don't know if I can if he won't work on himself.

Work: LOVING my job. I had SO MUCH FUN at the Kansas City Depos. I was there for the World Series parade. LOL.

Other things: I have amazing, loving, supportive friends. I love living with my best friend. I love having my friends there to talk to. I do have two friendships that are going away due to marital problems, but I think that is for the best. If you can't be a friend when I am having a hard time, then you aren't a friend.

[pinkdutchtulips]

My divorce is in limbo - saving up the money for a lawyer to fine tune the default judgment so I can have a judge sign off on it and be DONE w xh. The only things I want are 1- the RO custody order to be made permanent and 2- I don't have to pay him one penny (he's a transient and chronic drug abuser *documented use*).

Dating - still doing Tinder and OKC, lots of swiping LEFT but I've been chatting w a guy from Tinder - he's got 3 boys and 3 dogs seems to be very sweet and very much a gentleman we'll see how it shakes out

DD - we had our baseline observation to see where to begin w her and therapy - high anxiety levels for her re security and protection and high stress levels for me. We'll both be in therapy w some family sessions thrown in there. One thing they asked was when was the last time I had a break from DD where I could take as much 'me' time as I wanted ... I laughed. I guessed January ?!? They weren't happy w the response. We get to work on me getting more downtime for myself so I can parent DD better :/

[Deleted]

Things are pretty great here, stable and I guess kind of boring to talk about. My job is a lot of fun, I've been here since the end of March and recently I feel like I'm fully understanding all the different aspects of the program I administer. I work with a lot of really fun retired people, and I laugh more than I ever have in any job in the past.

My BF and I just had our 2 year anniversary. The fact that we hit that milestone seems crazy to me. In some ways it feels like we've been together longer, but 2 years sounds like a long time and I guess I expected by now that I'd be annoyed with him or we'd fight over stupid stuff or at least I wouldn't be as excited about him as I still am. Things are actually really great still, and while life together isn't always full of romance it's always full of fun and kindness toward one another.

We recently bought tickets to visit his family in Europe next summer, and I'm really excited because that means going to Berlin, Prague (no family there, just a side trip), and London. His family is not super close so I imagine we'll have plenty of time to explore and hang out on our own, too.

Nothing has really changed when it comes to relationships with other people - I still have a lot of great friends and a wonderful family. I just spent last weekend with my family and I'm excited that I'll see them again in 3 weeks for Thanksgiving and again a month later for Christmas. This time of year is the best for spending quality time with them. We're also going to the Dominican Republic as a family in February so I'm getting excited for a full week together.

I guess the only bad news is that my dog has lymphoma. We've been treating it with chemo and he's done mostly well so far, and his vet things he's making great progress in shrinking his lymph nodes. I hate seeing how much he's aged in the last year or so - he also has arthritis and we had to stop his anti-inflammatory when he started cancer treatment, so he's weaker than before but still seems mostly happy. I worry about him constantly though, which sucks.

[Wanderista]

I'm generally doing pretty well, all things considered. I'm still dating the guy who I met in May 2014. We kind of half-live together which is working for me right now. We have kind of a "flexi-schedule" that I really like. Sometimes I can work from home at his place, other times, I have very absorbing work in a different area. 

I am genuinely ambivalent about my work. I can keep doing it or I could do something else and be fine with that. So, I'm sort of living in the moment and seeing where life takes me. If I really wanted a change then I would do it. My ambivalence isn't really a bad thing at all and my life is pretty good. 

I like my life the way that I am living it right now. Sure, there will probably be changes in the future but they will happen when I want them to. Life is kind of a free form thing for me but I am enjoying it. There are some stresses but I don't sweat them too much. I also don't worry too much about how I appear to other people. My life is pretty much working for me.

[dreamcrisp1]

Things are going well for me. 

My new job is going really good and I am super ridiculously busy. BF is leaving for South Africa in 2 months, which sucks. However, we've picked a wedding month and year so that's cool. In Costa Rica. 

Other than that, really not much going on with me. 

[redredwine]

I'll play!
I don't go on here as much, if I have time I post on H&G and browse on MM.

Things at work are going so much better lately. I hit a stride with my difficult boss and we're working much better together. She's helping me with my career development and aiming to get me into a new position by next summer which is awesome (assuming I keep working hard).
N and I are doing great. We still marvel over the fact that we found each other (and that we are NOT each others exes, lol). We're not perfect, we have our annoyances with one another, but we're grateful for each other. Married 1 year in August. We bought a home at the start of the year and have had one thing go wrong after hte other. We call it the money pit...but we still love it and we're making needed improvements. We joke that as soon as we earmark money to do something to the house, something else breaks and there goes the budget for the project we wanted. Fun times. Our puppies are great.
We're discussing future 2 legged puppies (a baby) and maybe next summer we'll see how that goes. No immediate plans. WE're just focusing on us and our busy lives right now.
My photography business blew up this summer and just started slowing down. I couldn't be happier with it and now I'm just focusing on getting weddings next year-I really love shooting weddings.
That's all I got.

[LoveBug]

I try to post when I can, but it's hard.

Update on me: I started a new job in August and really like it. Still with the BF and next week will be the one year anniversary from our first date, which is nuts! We just had our kids meet and introduced them to each of us last month, and it's been going so well. They love hanging out with each other. So we are delighted. And we just started the talk about potentially living together one day, no rush though, but we have a lot to discuss.

[berbles]

I finally got a job back in July. I'm working for a CSA. We do organic produce delivery and office fruit baskets. I'm pretty much running the whole office, handling customers, etc. I really like it. My boss is amazing and everything is super flexible. I went into the office this morning around 11:30. I was working for a few mins when the power went out. So now I'm at home, in my pj's, "working." LOVE. HOWEVER, it's part time. Which, especially in this area, is not something I can sustain for very long. I'm making less than half my previous take-home (closer to 60% less), plus paying my own insurance, and no benefits to speak of. I've talked to my boss about increasing my hours and pay, but there just isn't a whole lot of extra money to work with. So I'm focusing on bringing in new clients (especially the office fruit baskets - that's where the big money is). It's working, but slowly.

On the flip side, I got a text this morning from my mom's former office manager/patent paralegal. She's going to be hiring a jr. patent paralegal soon. UGH. I'm so torn. I HATED my previous job, but a) I had a shitty backstabbing coworker and b) I was working as an admin AND paralegal; and getting paid as an admin. So working for someone I know and like and not having to be an admin might make the work more bearable.

BF is also dealing with some shitty politics at his job and I'm pushing him to get his cover letter together and start looking hard for something else. He also applied for school! He wants to get his BS in Occupational Health & Safety. Pretty exciting!

[Serenity9]

I'm looking for a new job, but I'm not finding time to get everything done. I have a lot going on in the evenings and on the weekends. I'm singing in a choir concert this weekend, and I think it's going to turn out great! I got a gym membership that I've only used once.  :?

I'm still seeing cute/shy guy, and things are going well! I still haven't friended him on FB, LOL! We're meeting up for dinner tonight.

[berbles]

Nov 5, 2015 18:50:59 GMT -5 @32flavors said:

I don't post much in general and this board has been slow so I haven't been around.

Work is good- I've been working on a really big negotiation and I just had validation from someone I respect that we have accomplished a lot. I'm looking at expanding in a new area (I've been looking for my next thing for awhile). I'm still gathering info but I'm looking forward to the idea of a new challenge.

Kids are awesome and fun. Ex and I are doing great at co-parenting and working with each other. Bd and I are awesome. Building a relationship but not forcing anything. This weekend we have a girl's weekend planned with dd her bff, bd and my two bff's at a beach resort. It is d's bday gift. I'm so excited.

I'm not dating anyone. Life is really full and I'm open to dating hut not pursuing it in any real way. Tinder is more akin to candy crush at the moment. Still see ginger and that friendship is good.

SUPER happy to hear you're doing so well! Good luck with the new adventure!

[glitzyglow]

Work: Very good! My hours just changed to an earlier shift and I spend the first hour of everyday looking at microfilms of old wills, lawsuit, etc. I love it. I also helped a man with his genealogy yesterday while at work and I am so happy that I get paid to do such things. I have some ideas for the upcoming year that I hope to make a reality.

Life: I saw my therapist 2x, but I don't think I'll see him again. He had a hard time remembering what I'd told him the week before and I don't feel like he gave me any real feedback this time as how to deal with some issues. I'm still having crazy dreams (sometimes violent) and a lot of dreams featuring exH, which is SO annoying because I am not thinking about him consciously. I made a goal for myself to run at least 1 mile everyday in November, and so far so good. In fact, I'm enjoying it. Getting a new cut and color next week, so I'm also happy about that...I feel so much more like "me" with shorter hair. I'm also going to a bonfire this weekend where I'm just acquaintances with everyone there, but I want to put myself out there more and this is a great opportunity to do so.

Love: Nada and nothing on the horizon. I was playing on Tinder earlier, though. I just can't quit you, Tinder!

[1confused1]

I'll chime in.

I got some pretty devastating news a few months ago about xh's health. We do not have any sort of relationship, I have a restraining order against him, but I do feel bad for him. I am hoping this is his rock bottom and he starts getting his life together.

My kids are amazing. I am helping coach my son's basketball team and I absolutely love it. We are still working on balancing school, homework and extra curricular activities, but we're getting there.

Work is way better than it was a few months ago when I was ready to quit.

I am working on getting myself healthy. I started a new AD and feel so good. I finally have motivation to work out and have started eating better. I am not dating and not really interested in it right now.

[verycontrary247]

Hi, my life is a train-wreck but I'm happy to see so many positive updates from you ladies!

[pandora]

Nov 6, 2015 1:10:20 GMT -5 RamblingRose said:

HI! I haven't been posting here much myself. Things with TL are rocking along. I'm starting a 4 year school two nights a week in Jan (it's a satellite of a private school in a city near me), and will be done with that in about 18 months or possibly a little less. I finally started working again, I'm working PT, making my own hours within reason at a local company. It's pretty cool, I can WFH or there is a desk for me there, as long as I keep up with the time-sensitive parts it will be low-stress. No client contact, so no dress code either. Yay. I'm still looking for either a FT job, or a second PT one but now that I'm working, I feel a lot better.
I've started walking again, I hadn't been doing it much because of the stray dog problem in the neighborhood, but I have a new route now and pepper spray.
That's about it for me. My life is quiet these days and I like it that way.


Oh, wait. I'm a grandma now.  (heart)

Grandma? CONGRATS!

[MauMau]

No dating for me still. I'm going the let something fall in my lap route vs looking. Mainly because I'm not interested in the online dating aspects right now. In the future probably.

Working on getting full time employment. Trying to decide if I want to stay where I've been now or back to where I was.

My mom got a new kitten this week. It's pretty adorable. Mau is being very nice to it and the transition of them being together has been a non issue. They like to play chase each other and pounce. It's cute.

Kitten



Mau giving me stink eye.

[jigsy]

I sort of updated in berbles thread, but here is a little more I guess...

Work - I have been interviewing for a company that I really want to work at. I think the work would be really exciting, there is room to learn and grow, and the work is 90% remote, so I would get to hang out with Jiggles more! I had my second interview last week, so I am hoping to hear back soon. But, even if this doesn't work out, I just started a new position at my current office where there is equal opportunity to learn and grow, just not really in a field I am interested in, but hey - money is good, so I will just suck it up and deal.

Life - I am pretty happy here. I have made some really great friends in LA and it feels like I am usually doing something, which is great. I have also kind of come to the point in my life where I am trying to embrace myself, exactly as I am. I weigh more than I would like, but I am at my level point, so if I don't work-out, don't watch what I eat, this is me. I want this me to be the person I like because otherwise I am constantly self-hating, and that is no way to live. What difference does 15-20 lbs make anyways?

Relationships - I have completely removed myself from online dating. It is just not my thing, so why force it. Another reason I would love to move to this new job is because it would open up my network to new people who are more my age. My current industry is older, and frankly, not too exciting. I really prefer meeting people in the wild and seeing how that goes. I am still seeing Vegas, although it is a lot less. I put a wall back up in regards to him, so we just have fun. In person, we still have crazy great chemistry, but to be honest, I really enjoy our hour long phone conversations just as much as the in-person stuff. I just like the guy as a person. I recently heard a Voltaire quote that kind of sums up how I feel about him right now - Perfect is the enemy of the good. What we have right now is good, and trying to make it "perfect" might make the good go away, so I am just enjoying the good, and keeping my boundaries when it comes to him and keeping myself open to new people. I've decided that I will not say no to a first date as long as there is any sort of interest on my part.

I think that rounds out the Jigsy update.

[calle28]

Job: Got my layoff notice last week. 4 weeks down, 5 more to go until I'm unemployed unless I find something. =/

Love: My boyfriend (R) and I have been together for 2 months. Things are great and I'm pretty sure we're going to get married. I know it's probably flameful, but we just know. I want us to be together for at least a year though before we get engaged.

Life: In general, I'm very happy. I could stand to lose a few pounds, I've gone back to the gym, but my diet still sucks. I really can't complain too much, my family and friends are great, I have things I'm looking forward to in the near future, life is good.

[alleinesein]

Job: still looking. Haven't heard back yet from the pt seasonal position I applied for.

Love: FWB just accepted a job in Portland. He leaves in 2 weeks so that relationship is now over and done. I'm not happy or thrilled about this at all.

Life: See above. I'm on month 32 of no job and my stress relief/happy fun time has just ended. It pretty much sucks right now.