End of the holidays=get up outta my house

[summer]

We had hot dogs on New Years eve. She was all like, *sigh* So how do you eat these hot dogs? I've only ever had them in line at Ikea." Lady, you live in Germany. You can't walk a half block without seeing a bratwurst. Stop playing.

Let me stop. I could write a book.

[cville]

No. Seriously. Write a book.

Title: Lessons From My German SIL

Subtitle: You Will Not Believe I Didn't Kill Her

[sushi]

Oh, judgey family. The worst! She sounds miserable.

But I do like the lights dimmed for dinner with candlelight. It's just what I grew up with. It's not dinnertime if the lights are on full.

Also, I need there to be music.

I fully recognize these are my issues and would not judge someone serving me food if they don't do that. Anytime someone gives me food, let alone hosts me, is a time I'm happy.

[sushi]

Jan 1, 2016 17:35:10 GMT -5 cville said:

No. Seriously. Write a book.

Title: Lessons From My German SIL

Subtitle: You Will Not Believe I Didn't Kill Her

Yes, please. Write this book.

Can I reiterate judgey family is the worst!

[emilyj]

Jan 1, 2016 12:10:17 GMT -5 summer said:

Jan 1, 2016 8:37:00 GMT -5 panicked said:

Is your SIL gwenneth paltrow?

I'd take Gwyneth any day. She took the small one to the park to "help me out" which would have been awesome except the implied subtext was "because you aren't taking your child out enough." She cleaned the kitchen (helpful), then said she was doing it because "cleaning the kitchen and being tidy comes automatic to [me] but not to others." (unhelpful) And later added "I don't mind using my holiday time to do the same tasks here that I do at home."

I'd give her a list of shit I needed done.

[asdfjkl]

Jan 1, 2016 17:28:19 GMT -5 summer said:

We had hot dogs on New Years eve. She was all like, *sigh* So how do you eat these hot dogs? I've only ever had them in line at Ikea." Lady, you live in Germany. You can't walk a half block without seeing a bratwurst. Stop playing.

Let me stop. I could write a book.

[pretzel]

I would have buried her in the basement by now. I applaud your restraint.

[MrsAxilla]

Jan 1, 2016 20:07:52 GMT -5 asdfjkl said:

Jan 1, 2016 17:28:19 GMT -5 summer said:

We had hot dogs on New Years eve. She was all like, *sigh* So how do you eat these hot dogs? I've only ever had them in line at Ikea." Lady, you live in Germany. You can't walk a half block without seeing a bratwurst. Stop playing.

Let me stop. I could write a book.

This gif doesn't get used often enough.

ETA: will you give me the link?

[Mrs.Rad888]

Jan 1, 2016 16:48:21 GMT -5 cville said:

Jan 1, 2016 16:32:09 GMT -5 summer said:

She made a comment about me brushing my children's hair before going to the bowling alley. "Are we beautifying ourselves for this trip?"

W
T
F


Yes. If by "beautifying" you mean "looking like you care about yourself," hairbrushing is beautifying.

I predict at least one of her children turns into Ziggy Stardust and never ever visits his/her insufferable mother again. SIL, of course, will be mystified.

And/or the spouse of one of her children snaps and kills her.

She's already insufferable as a SIL, can you imagine having her as your MIL? That would be grounds for divorce.