I was totally done Christmas shopping for DD (turned two last month) when out of nowhere she started insisting she wanted a pink stool for Christmas. "Mama, no yike dis one ..." (A little wooden stool that was mine when I was little) "want pink stool present, okay? Santa bring Yidia pink stool, okay?" While holding my face in her hands.
So I ordered her a $60 PBK pink fucking stool the other night. I'm so screwed, lol. But really, it's a fairly reasonable request.
Your kid cracks me up. I can't get DS to "get" Santa yet, and when I ask him what he wants for Christmas, he asks for yogurt. But like, he just wants yogurt *right then*. Lol
It is definitely an uphill battle telling her that she has to wait for her pink stool.
Post by nicechicken on Nov 30, 2016 23:12:15 GMT -5
DS: "my balls are my weak spot, mama" Me: what? DS: "my balls are my weak spot when touched Me: "yes, well, nobody should touch them... DS: "THEN WHY DID KEMBA(the dog) RAM INTO THEM?! TWO LANES PEOPLE! TWO. LANES. "
Post by themysteriouswife on Nov 30, 2016 23:50:13 GMT -5
This was last night and she's 9.
Allie: Mom, what would the world be like without us? Me: Us as in... she interrupts Allie: you. Me: well, you and Myles wouldn't be here. Allie: oh Me: wait.. are you plotting my death? Allie: not today.
Ds1 (4yrs) : "Mommy, you want to do a shot?" *me looking at him confused * Ds1 "you want to do a shot before bed? Let's do shots mommy."
I eventually figured out he was talking about a race car launching toy he has.
Wait till he goes to school and tells someone that mom does shots with him before bed. Lol
My niece hated going to daycare when she was younger (3-4ish) anyways so my sister made it a game with her to race to the car. My niece would always yell I'm going to beat you. After a few times of my niece losing the race she told daycare that her "my mom beat me this morning."
My sister got called into the directors office when she picked my niece up that day. My sister had to talk to my niece about which words shouldn't be used at certain times. Lol (thankfully after my sister explaining it and my talking to my niece everything was all good)
at my 93 yo gpa's house in the San Gabriel mountains in so cal over thanksgiving
me - gpa's house doesn't have wifi
7yo dd - WHAT !!!!! How does he watch YouTube
me- gpa doesn't watch YouTube
7 yo - STUNNED SILENCE
dd without fail ALWAYS asks if where we're going has wifi ... steve jobs must be BEAMING from ear to ear over that one
My 6 year old could not believe the nursing home my 94 yr old grandma lives in didn't have wi-fi. He walked around holding the tablet up saying, "it's got to be here, where is it hiding?!?"
DS (7) told me this morning he likes using a urinal better than a regular toilet because he doesn't have to aim and watch himself pee, which he said he thinks is totally gross and weird. He then said that sometimes at school, he just stands at the urinal with his hands on his hips and moves his hips around to draw pictures
at my 93 yo gpa's house in the San Gabriel mountains in so cal over thanksgiving
me - gpa's house doesn't have wifi
7yo dd - WHAT !!!!! How does he watch YouTube
me- gpa doesn't watch YouTube
7 yo - STUNNED SILENCE
dd without fail ALWAYS asks if where we're going has wifi ... steve jobs must be BEAMING from ear to ear over that one
My 6 year old could not believe the nursing home my 94 yr old grandma lives in didn't have wi-fi. He walked around holding the tablet up saying, "it's got to be here, where is it hiding?!?"
Whenever we're in the car and the signal drops on whatever device she's watching, L heaves a big sigh and says "Mommy/Daddy, it's not working. We have to find the single!"
Henry was partial to the letter O for the longest time. He insisted so hard that his name started with it that we started putting an O before Henry when writing it.
He also liked to say, "fucking A".
We told him he was not allowed to say "fucking A".
So he started saying "fucking O" instead. Because it was his favorite letter.
DH's parents and two of his grandparents died within 11 months of each other. We had all four funerals at the same place. At our last funeral, my FIL's, we walked into the funeral home and the funeral director was standing there to greet us. DS (3 or 4 at the time) says "Hey Denny, what's up? Can we go to your office and get the wi-fi password?"
And at the funeral luncheon, at a fancy country club, the doors to our car were open while we were getting out in the parking lot. DS gets in between them, pulls his suit pants down and starts peeing. I asked him what in the world he was doing, and he looks at me innocently and says, Daddy does it (we had just been at a hockey game a few nights before, and DH and his buddy peed in the parking lot between the car doors).
My son is 8 now, but when he was about 5 we went out to eat. The server came to take our drink order and I asked for a water. My son looked at me like he was SUPER confused and said “Mom, you know they have beer here, right?” I guess me ordering water was just too weird for him. I’m a great role model. Lol
Post by emoflamingo on Dec 1, 2016 12:15:00 GMT -5
We went to Walmart the other night and we usually require 2 carts so we can keep the two littles contained and while H followed me with DS2, I hear "Mommy, you shakin' yo booty!" and then hysterical laughter. From both DS1 and DS2.
The only funny thing DD says right now is "Ummmm no." Last night, I spent 2 minutes going back and forth with her saying "yes" and "ummm no" until she leans in to give me a kiss and then, as she kisses, she opens her mouth and says "no." Like she had to get the last word. I also figured out she says "tee-tee" for Kitty when she said it after I yelled at the cat to stop eating food off the floor. Best stage ever.
DD (6) Recently asked for an iPad for Christmas. I explained that we were not going to be getting iPads because they are really just too much money.
DD says "Oh I know, mom. I asked Santa for it. Not you."
OH. Ok then.
DS1 did this last year. "I asked Santa for the iPad because I know you and Daddy don't have the money for it." I already had one and you bet your ass I put "Mommy and Daddy" on that tag.
DD (6) Recently asked for an iPad for Christmas. I explained that we were not going to be getting iPads because they are really just too much money.
DD says "Oh I know, mom. I asked Santa for it. Not you."
OH. Ok then.
DS1 did this last year. "I asked Santa for the iPad because I know you and Daddy don't have the money for it." I already had one and you bet your ass I put "Mommy and Daddy" on that tag.
Ha! Just like I'm putting our names on those Hatchimals this year too -- Santa isn't taking credit for those babies!
I had an argument last night with my 4 yo about his nipples. He could not be convinced that they were not, in fact, his listening ears.
Whatever, kid. I tried.
DD1 always called them her "nibbles" and it was too cute to correct. And DS learned from her, so he also calls them nibbles. It's pretty cute to hear them in the bath comparing their nibbles and does DD2 have nibbles and "oooh daddy I see your nibbles!"
Gregory is 5 and Natalie is 3 and worship him. G wanted to dress up like a ninja Shi they go dress in all black and put scarves on their heads and come running out...
N(proud as can be): yook mommy, I'm a inja turtle!!
G whispers to her in that sweet older bro explaining something voice, "no Natalie, your just a ninja person, not a turtle".
Post by Mrs. Meerkat on Dec 2, 2016 14:18:16 GMT -5
And for you Supernatural fans:
Yesterday he was just finished using the bathroom and I needed to help him pull up his underwear and pants. As I bent down to lift up his underwear he throws his hands in the air and yells, "PUDDING!"
I fell over on the floor laughing and died.
He has not seen any supernatural, but we have him do the pudding yell when we give him a pudding cup.
Him doing it with his pants around his ankles did me in. Lol
Post by textbookcase on Dec 2, 2016 14:50:16 GMT -5
My 12 year old went of on this tangent last night: "do you think that in the movie Zootopia the animals with human-like characteristics rounded up the humans and held them prisoner to observe their mannerisms before killing or eating them all and adapting to their way of life?"