I'm out of the hospital and after enjoying a long hot shower and some painkillers, I finally feel human again.
I'm really not looking forward to dealing with the airport and flying tomorrow but I'm ready to go home.
My sisters drove down and surprised me by bringing my two BFFs with them! We had a great time Thursday night with dinner and margaritas. DH left us and went to the room and we stayed down in the bar drinking and chatting.
The surgery lasted over three hours and the Dr said he removed anything that looked suspicious and then they did a "shake and bake" chemo on me where they heat up the chemotherapy meds and poured them into my abdomen and then they literally shook my body all over the place to distribute the chemo. One of the surgical nurses said she'll be sore because they really shake me hard. Luckily, I didn't feel any of that.
I have three incisions on my stomach and I had a lot of nausea after the surgery. I cannot remember ever throwing up that much.
I have only managed a few bites of food each day since Thursday, but I don't really have an appetite.
dove came to see me with her handsome husband (!!) and she saved me because she bought me watermelon, which is the only thing I really wanted to eat. dove, I love you sister, for coming to see me and bringing me food Gracias!
I met with the surgeon this morning and it wasn't very encouraging. He said that he didn't realize how frail I was from the chemo I had been on and he said he isn't sure if I would survive a total gastrectomy (removal of my stomach).
I didn't think I was that bad off, but that's what he said.
He's meeting with some fellows in a couple of weeks and he's presenting my case to them. My options are 1. do another shake and bake, 2. Attempt the stomach removal with the knowledge that I might not survive it, or 3. Do nothing which is not good because then they won't be able to buy me more time.
It's really disappointing because I was desperately hoping that they would help me and now that may not even be an option.
I'm eternally thankful for all of your prayers, love, and support.
I'll be home tomorrow and then I have an appointment with my oncologist next week.
I'm taking a few days off to process what's happening but please know that I think about you all, every single day.
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny