Weekend plans - the kids and I are camping this weekend with friends, DH is working. It should be fun; pool, waterslides, bike riding, golf carts, etc... but it is supposed to be 1000 degrees. DS is blowing up my phone asking if his new friend he made at camp can come (I went to high school with his parents). That would be great, but bed space is limited in a camper. He's now lobbying for a tent, and hour away at his sleepover camp.
FFFC - my great aunt passed today. I am bummed I didn't take the time to go visit. I knew she came home with Hospice, but didn't really know it was hours to days, not days to weeks (I learned these Hospice terms with dad). I haven't seen her in a while, but she was a more cantankerous version of my grandmother who was my favorite person on the planet.
Post by freezorburn on Jun 15, 2018 10:33:13 GMT -5
Today is my first kid-free, work-free day in over 3 weeks. I am so tired I am not sure when I will drag my ass out of bed. Seriously don’t know how people who do not have an other parent in the picture do it, esp if more than one kid.
I have a to do list that I wrote out last night, so will be tackling that all weekend. Blocked out tonight to go to the spa. Movie tomorrow night, mini golf Sunday morning and then meeting up with a friend Sunday evening. Should be pretty low key but still productive.
Spending today trying to wrap my head around all the work stuff I have going on. We're going away to my parents' house this weekend. It's supposed to be a fabulous weekend for weather, with lots of time for boat rides and beach. But I need to get caught up on stupid work to-dos and wrap my head around everything that's just been added to my plate. Next week I'm only working a half week, then I'm in the office for a week, then I'm off for a full week on vacation.
I'm starting to regret my scheduled vacation time this summer, because it's going to all go to hell with this new work on my plate. And that sucks. I never take time off for fun.
My dog is 15. She immigrated back from AUS with me and she’s seriously my best friend - I tell her “let’s go to work” in the morning and she sleeps in my office. She has accidents 2-3 times a day and fell down the stairs this week, so I gated them and have been working in the kitchen so she’s pooping on tile instead of carpet. Last night she slid on the wood floors and could not stand. Took me five minutes and a towel to get her up. Her back legs are very weak and her front legs are getting that way too. Two vets in the last two years haven’t had any recommendations. She’s just getting old. I don’t know what to do and I am so sad to see her like this. Then some mornings she does zoomies around the house. But that’s getting pretty rare.
DH is making me insane - we are apparently now paying for SS’ outpatient care (hundreds a month). His kids have other plans on FD so proposed different schedules to see him but they always flake - so I am not excited about carving out time that they won’t appear. Date night Saturday is now cancelled in favor of SD not actually showing up. He told her all he had was swim lessons on Saturday so of course she picked that time and told him I can take the kids. He told her no but that ruins dinner date - during which I planned to discuss the current challenges at home without the kids with us.
I just need a break. The kids are here at 1:15 every day and I am doing all mornings because DH can’t seem to do it. He got in last night and this morning he said he just assumed I would get the kids ready despite conversations to the contrary and wants to know “what the big deal is”. It’s like having a fourth, disobedient and selfish child and I am so over it. Something has to change. Last week I literally left him here with the kids one day so he didn’t have a choice but with this injury the gym is out.
We are hosting FD for all siblings and skids (but they changed their plans). I am going to make DH do all the shopping and organizing and cooking like I had to do for Mother’s Day.
Post by covergirl82 on Jun 15, 2018 10:51:55 GMT -5
rere, sorry about your great-aunt. I know how you feel about regretting not visiting. I had gone back and forth about taking a Thursday afternoon off to visit my grandpa when he was close to passing away, but decided not to because I already had plans to visit on Friday. He ended up passing away Thursday night, and I'm sad I didn't take the time off work to say a final goodbye.
It is a baseball tournament weekend. DS's first game is tonight at 6. Then tomorrow's first game is at 4, which is great. I have all morning and early afternoon to work on cleaning. And it's going to be super hot, so I'm glad we won't have to spend all day in the heat. Although depending on how the team plays on Sunday, we could be out in the heat for a while. Sunday evening DH and I are going to a concert - he got free tickets from work. Not sure when we're going to celebrate Father's day. Maybe we can take DH to breakfast tomorrow.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Jun 15, 2018 12:11:35 GMT -5
We have another Friday grill out at the pool. DS really really wants to go and DH (never the social guy) seems to have caught DD's cold. I'm predicting he will definitely not want to go, so then I have to decide if I'm going to take DS and DD solo or not....I don't know. It's a bit awkward b/c it's social hour out there. I know some people that will be there so maybe we'll do it. We'll see.
I'm also trying to figure out if I have time to take the kids to see the Incredibles. DH also definitely doesn't want to do that.
Post by sandandsea on Jun 15, 2018 12:23:15 GMT -5
Yesterday I got a rude, demanding email from a coworker about something that is in my realm of authority. He didn’t like not being able to dictate something and not get his way. I replied very assertively and directly because I know this guys MO is to trample others to bring them down and himself up. He’s a jerk. I wasn’t about to let him do it to me. Our boss asked to chat with each of us separately. I walked in and said “I know what I did and it was on purpose because I needed to be assertive” and he agreed with me. If I was a man, the initial lack of respect wouldn’t have happened In the first place and I wouldn’t be in a position where I needed to be assertive to be respected. Now they probably just think I’m a B. But I’m not going to roll over and let this db trample me. Ugh. I’m so glad it’s Friday.
2chatter we have your dogs twin brother. He's an Australian cattle dog. Exact same scenario. He's 15, can no longer do stairs, so many accidents, pretty sure he's going deaf, can't stand if he's on the hardwood, paces around the kitchen and most of the time chooses to sleep all day in his kennel. Last few weeks he's started not finishing his meals. It's so sad to watch. Every morning I'm scared I'm going to find him passed away in his kennel. DH will be devasted, he's his dog, he's had him since he was 6 weeks old and fit in his pocket.
2chatter, I was telling DH while he was in the shower, the kids have a cook out so no need to pack lunches unless they want extra food. He is like why are you telling me this while I wash my face.
And I said I am not doing anything, I am not doing dishes, I am not doing anything for the kids. I am leaving, good bye. And I left, and then he calls to confirm no swim class at camp today- nope good bye.
katrine05 - it’s so sad! We had to put our cattle down because he became insanely violent when I was pregnant with DS, and when DS was 11 months old knocked through the French doors to try to attack the kids, so he was not eligible to be rehomed. It broke my heart, but at least there was a build up and then it was over. I can see this lasting for a year or two and it’s so hard to watch, but when she’s good she’s so good! She’s a dingo and they can live to 22, so it also makes me feel like this is so early.
katrine05 - it’s so sad! We had to put our cattle down because he became insanely violent when I was pregnant with DS, and when DS was 11 months old knocked through the French doors to try to attack the kids, so he was not eligible to be rehomed. It broke my heart, but at least there was a build up and then it was over. I can see this lasting for a year or two and it’s so hard to watch, but when she’s good she’s so good! She’s a dingo and they can live to 22, so it also makes me feel like this is so early.
That does seem so early! I saw a lot of dingo's on Fraser Island when I was there years ago. Hope she doesn't continue to go downhill. I didn't grow up with pets so this is all new to me.
waverly - without swim today will he be like “you just drop them together I don’t get why this is complicated?”
He was doing drop off and couldn’t remember. But yes without DD’s swim class then they are dropped off together. But either way he was doing it which he doesn’t mind, but I still have to do the other 15 steps to getting ready, so today I was like nope and left for work.
It’s a low risk day to just leave because no swimming and no lunches.
But his attitude sometimes is just I don’t know what it is. Like I say brush DD’s hard and he tells me it looks fine/ good enough. Like wut? Hair still needs to be brushed daily even if it doesn’t get messed up that particular night. Just do what I ask because I am doing 15 other things!
waverly - I actually looked for the pics I took of before and after brushing the kids’ hair. DS buries his head in his pillows and rubs in his sleep so it’s a knotted mess and DD has long hair. DH is like “it’s fine” so I did side x sides to illustrate my point. I must have deleted them. But preach! I’m like - thirty seconds on DS’ head - it’s not hard! The kids don’t have to look homeless!
DH had a long talk with FIL about his plans for moving and caring for MIL. FIL is starting to get overwhelmed and wishes he had extra help. DH told him to call the home aide service that the social worker recommended. FIL gave excuses. Then FIL started asking about DH's availability next week as MIL has 3 doctors appointments. DH told him that he is limited because DD has camp. Also, DH has to get my dad to look after the boys while he helps FIL and MIL. DH hates to do tough love, but if he can't help, then so be it. FIL needs to have some help that's other than us. DH said FIL was showing him where all the important papers and stuff are around the house, just in case. I shudder to think what will happen if FIL ends up in the hospital because he hasn't been taking care of himself. He's already hurt his back a few times because he was impatient and didn't wait for a nurse to help lift MIL at the nursing home. Also, MIL ended up at the ER yesterday because her catheter was blocked and she had really bad abdominal pain. After a few hours, they were able to go home.
Tomorrow, we'll be going to the in-laws to celebrate Father's Day. I have no idea what time dinner is or what we'll be having - it hasn't been settled yet. On Sunday, we'll go to my parents. My aunt and uncle are in town, so it will be nice to see them.
Post by covergirl82 on Jun 15, 2018 14:27:30 GMT -5
polecat8, has your H thought about just contacting the home aide service and setting it up on behalf of his dad? I believe my co-worker ended up doing that for his dad when his stepmom was in declining health. CW's dad continued to act like he could handle it and so wouldn't make the call. CW and his wife both work, so they couldn't just drop everything to help when a need arose. Also, I wonder if your FIL could just call your H from the doctor's office so your H can still participate in the appointment without having to physically be there.
Post by traveltheworld on Jun 15, 2018 15:58:06 GMT -5
We are taking the kids to see the Incredibles 2 tomorrow morning. Neither child has ever been to a movie theater, or seen a movie for that matter, so we'll see how this goes. It's being sponsored by my employer so it's free, and there will be popcorn, candy, face painting, etc., so I thought we'd just go, and if they don't like it, we can leave without me feeling like we wasted money.
Then we have some friends over for BBQ tomorrow night, then father's day brunch with my parents, and then taking DS to a birthday party. It'll be a busy weekend but I'm looking forward to it.
My FFC: I used to always side-eye parents who spend so much time and effort in planning their kids' birthday parties, yet here I am, diligently and meticulously planning DS's birthday party.
We may be hosting Father’s Day....my in laws are flaky and can’t decide. Whatever, I will just buy enough food for everyone, yum steak, and we can eat the leftovers.
We are spending the night at a hotel near the beach tomorrow. So that is our weekend, which now seems like a great idea since it is supposed to be 90 all weekend here. At the beach it will be 80-85 and breezy with a lake to jump into. So much better! Too bad DD has soccer tomorrow morning, so we have to wait until after soccer to go. I might pack tonight- not sure. It is just one night, so it shouldn't be too bad to pack.
Post by erinshelley21 on Jun 15, 2018 18:54:11 GMT -5
We are having a night at home. DH and I have been going all day and are both wore out. I think DS is sick with something. He says his feet, stomach and throat hurt so not entirely sure what to make of that.
DH works tomorrow but I am meeting people to buy about 75% of the furniture at my office in the morning. After that not really sure. I need to go to the grocery and go price the chopped tire stuff for playgrounds for our playset coming Wednesday. Also need to get the fathers day crafts for DH done.
Still don't have plans for actual fathers day figured out. Our challenge at the gym ends tonight so I'm guessing DH will wait to just eat all day lol.
I’m at DH’s work event. The first night went well. On Saturdays of this event, I usually get a massage. I did not schedule one far enough in advance today, and the only one open is 9am. $180 for 50 mins (expensive, even for what we normally pay!!). I decided I prefer breakfast. So I’m taking a bath in our amazing suite. And will do it at least once more tomorrow. And getting a massage elsewhere at a later date.
Also, due to a series of issues, my only access to this board is remotely. A large amount of my posting here was done from PC at work, so it’s really cut back on how much I post here. So lame.
Sort of busy weekend... I spent yesterday evening with my dad visiting his sister in the hospital. Our family has drifted from his side, and he’s lost 3 of his 5 siblings in recent years. The only two left are a horrible, nasty sister; and this one, my godmother. She has dementia, and her husband, while sharp as a tack mentally, is 82 with health issues. She got out if the house while he was watching TV one evening, trying to “go home” to her childhood home. She fell and fractured her skull and has a clot in her brain. She lives close to me and I’m sad that I let petty family crap get in the way of maintaining our relationship.
Today DD has her piano recital. It’s been such a tough week at school for her. I hope she can block it out and perform like I’ve seen her. Tomorrow my parents will come for Father’s Day. We will hang by the pool and grill.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Jun 16, 2018 5:35:04 GMT -5
k3am, that's a great picture! Did she wear her formal wear to her prek graduation? I love it!!
My neighbors that live behind us had a party yesterday at their pool past 10 pm. Kids and adults screaming (with joy and some kind of competitive excitement) at the to of their lungs and we could hear it all really well. That was annoying. And also made me feel old and mean since I found it annoying.
I was also probably a little grumpy since DS came home sick with DD's cold. So DS, DD and DH are all sick...and I kind of feel it creeping up on me too. So instead of going to the pool this afternoon we watched the Smurf's movie with Neil Patrick Harris...which is a really crappy movie.
DS keeps watching the Looney Tunes movie with Brendan Fraser. I thought Smurfs would be a change --- even if not an improvement. Not really.
We did nothing last night. Today is grocery shopping, then gym and pool time this afternoon. Tomorrow we have brunch reservations at 12:30. Phone calls to dads. Cleaning. Truly, we lead exciting lives.
Better for a TWERK but... This has been an absolute shit show of a week with DH’s mental health. His therapist really came through for me this week on forcing some reckoning that the meds are making things dramatically worse. He’s taking a break from drinking entirely (so I am too in support) and knows he needs to taper off one of the meds ASAP. I am looking frantically for a new psychiatrist but everyone who takes insurance has a month’s-long waiting list. Everyone who doesn’t take insurance is so outrageously expensive. And H’s unemployment already has us spending our savings at an alarming clip.
I had to send my boss an email about what is going on because I’ve been suddenly WFH so many times in the past week or two. I tried to make it as short, high-level, and unmelodramatic as possible but I’m not sure I succeeded. His one line response was “do what you gotta do and go where you gotta go” sooooo I guess it’s fine?