Brand new Monday celebration and vents

[akafred]

Celebration: DH decided DD can go to overnight camp! It isn't for a month but I am so excited for her. She has wanted this for a long time but hasn't been in the right place. Last year her meds were off (Prozac was BAD) and before that she wasn't really old enough or mature enough.

Vent: My special project at work is sofa king boring. I am trying to make a lot of progress because it is just so so so boring!

[mae0111]

Celebration: we had an end-of-season pool party for the softball team. Only 1/2 the team showed up, but the kids had a ball.

Celebration: DH and I have been in a real funk in every aspect of our relationship. We had a couple of really good talk this weekend and I think we have turned a corner.

Vent: DD2 split her chin open in the pool and has stitches. It was really difficult to keep her under control in the pool at the party so I had to pull her out. Not happy. Lots of crying.

[shakinros]

Celebration: this was a really nice weekend. DH participated. He slept close to regular hours (bed at 1:30ish instead of 3 or 4). He did some things around the house and went to the gym and cooked dinner. I don’t know why he can’t see the connection between doing the mental health basics and having better days: sleep enough, exercise, drink less. Whatevs though. As compared to the previous weeks, it was nearly perfect. I know it won’t last but I am grateful for these couple days.

Vent: I am starting to not be a fan of DD’s bestie. She’s really a lot and quite defiant, and I don’t think the girls play all that well together. She was over for 90 mins on Saturday and there were tears three times. I was convinced the girls would be split up next year, but nope: same first grade class. Sigh. At least her parents are cool.

[justcheckingin73]

Celebration: had a great vacation last week in the OBX. We rented a beach house with our family, my sister and her family and my parents. We got lots of beach time, went to an aquarium, went shopping and even did a 5K on the beach (in the sand) which was incredibly hard! All in all a great week and so far nothing major happened at work so emails are low, my 9 am meeting was cancelled and my transition has been pain free. Score!

Vent: my only vent at this point is that I’m not independently wealthy and able to live the vacation lifestyle all the time.

[twinmomma]

Celebration: Awesome weekend away with MIL at a quilt festival. We had a great time and I learned a lot.
Vent: I'm so sick today. I definitely ate something that I shouldn't have without realizing it. I was late to work and sick all morning, but I know it's a dietary/my body thing, not a real illness, so I came to work. Too much time out of the office this month as is. But I'm hurting.

[rere]

Vent: When DH works, he is pretty much out of the picture because of the long hours. We go about our days pretty easily. I do exactly what I want, when I want. The kids and I function fine. When he is home, everything seems an effort. This morning, I asked him to tell Ds to clean up his room today. He asks, why didn't he do it this weekend? Why didn't you ask him this weekend. Well has stuff to do today. He had all weekend. He didn't do anything this weekend. Fine, don't do it, Why are you mad?

I'm mad because I am having a 10 minute conversation about this on the way out the door. Why can't I just say have DS clean his room and that be it. Everything is a freaking dissertation/debate/conversation!!

[supertrooper1]

It was a good weekend, even though I had to work. I was able to complete my resume and will apply for the sister agency job tomorrow when it opens. I also booked a trip to San Diego for next month, including airfare, a condo for 5 nights, 2 nights in a hotel and a rental car. Easiest vacation planning ever. I also ordered a bunch of stuff for my parents' anniversary party and had it shipped to their house. H has been painting the exterior of our house and it looks great. I feel very productive lately.

I'm off tomorrow and Wednesday. It's our anniversary tomorrow and we have a babysitter coming so we can go out to dinner. We haven't had a date night since November, so we're overdue.

[waverly]

On vacation. Yesterday we traveled for like 10 hours, plus walked 9 miles lots of stairs and wearing our packs. I think when we head out we will uber instead. I am sooo sore.

It was a beautiful day and we saw and did a lot already. Plus I always seem to travel during pride parades. I don’t plan it this way, don’t really think about and then I’m like oops we are in the middle of a pride parade with our luggage unable to cross the street. 😀 But eventually it started to spread out, and we could get through to our hotel.

[erinshelley21]

Celebration: I am making my last overnight trip for the agency this week! Our busy summer season is officially here which means I am about done.

Celebration 2: I am going the job search the rest of this week and if I don't get called for an interview for the jobs I've applied for in the last 3 weeks then I am taking it as a sign I'm supposed to take this insurance job with my friend. I've already moved a couple policies to him that needed things done with them. One is a BFF that knows I'm job searching and another was an emergency situation that I knew new agency could resolve quickly.
I think I've found an exit strategy with my current set up too that I can live with and won't feel like a slime ball but want to run by you guys...
Find homes for my accounts with the new agency but not actually move anything. Meet with current agency at the end of July (Head guy I would meet with has the same busy season I do on the crop side). Head guy has mentioned they would pay me for book. Tell him I don't want paid for it since I want to move it, but am also leaving about 20% of it there. If it goes well then fine, but if it doesn't then just let word of mouth do the talking for me.
Is this unethical? Grey area? I've been on the other side of this twice. The first time was on a much larger scale and the second time was just shitty but not as damaging. Both times my response to the people that left was I wish they had at least talked to me first so we could do it in the best way for both parties.

I don't have a copy of my contract if I ever signed one which is a big if, so there isn't a non-compete. Even if there is, ALL of my book is family/close friends so it wouldn't take much for them to find out. My biggest client is still my brother's client and I am sure I will be asked what my next gig will be.

[rere]

Another Vent: DDs birthday sleepover is tonight. Everyone is coming at 2 to go swimming (DH is in charge until I get there, and he may stay in charge). It is raining. She is worried they won't be able to swim, and won't have anything to do. Surely 5 13 year old girls can entertain themselves. I have pizzas, ice-cream cake, scary movies, and hopefully swimming, trampoline, and a creek if the weather holds off. For some reason, these girls like to put on their cute rubber boots and slosh around in the creek. Better than having their face in their phones I suppose.

[2chatter]

rere - yes yes yes on the “DH makes things complicated” thing. Last night after VBS DS cried for 45 minutes at bed time. DH tried to rush him into bed, which at 6, freaks him out. I tried not to say anything, after I went in and calmed DS in literally two minutes, but DH was like “how come he’s so good for you?”

I’m planning to enjoy this week with DH in Chicago. This weekend we have annual college roommate and spouse weekend away. DH is flying down so I will have a four hour drive alone and I can’t wait. I’m planning on leaving before traffic to get through the City (it took me 2.5 hours last Friday UGH), working from Starbucks for a couple hours then heading down. Will probably stop and work for another hour at my favorite college coffee shop - so no vaca time, but a leisurely and fun afternoon with dinner time arrival.

[mellym]

erinshelley21, remind me, does your current agency know you want to leave already? Wasn't that always the plan and that's why you're interviewing or no? What is different about new agency with your friend?

Celebration: We had a great weekend. We chilled as a family Friday night and then got a babysitter for the kids Saturday and went out for lunch, comedian show and ice cream with my parents and brother/SIL. I think this was the first time we've hung out as adults only since having DD1 and it was so fun! Then we played outside all day yesterday including a long hike along the lake. DD1 kept saying she didn't want our journey to end but it came to a crashing halt because DD2 was so tired and couldn't walk any further. We went to a drive-in ice cream shop after and DD1 was hilarious ordering her root beer and French fries. She thought it was the greatest thing that she got root beer. Meanwhile, DD2 kept yelling out the car window that she wanted chicken bones. They were a hoot!

[erinshelley21]

mellym, I had 2 agencies to begin with: the crop only agency, which is the one we merged and my brother is taking over, and then I was a sub-agent for another agency about 1.5 hours away from me for the other lines. The one I am a sub for knows I am thinking about leaving to do something else. The current set up with them has left a lot to be desired. I pay for my own E&O, do all of my own advertising, and I'm up here on what feels like my own little island with minimal support. They haven't required any quotas which has been nice. That would probably change and they would also want me to pay for the management system they use which would cost about $1500/year, so I'd have $3000 wrapped up in this every year. My friend's agency is set up more for agents to work remotely, but his offices are an hour north and south of me, which is easy to get to once a week just to get me out of the house or if I need to be present for a deal we've worked on together. He pays more in commission, pays my E&O, won't charge me to use his management system, and the biggest is he would refer business to me. His agency is booming and he has done zero advertising. He writes for at least 7 different companies and within 12 months has met his premium requirements with all of them and is in the top 3 in the state for one of them. His employees are very happy too. They worked with him at another agency and one lady came out of retirement to work for him and her H is going to do the same.

When my brother and I met with the agency we merged the crop with I felt like the offer and set up was too good to be true and the set up really couldn't be that easy. We are 9 months into the merge and it wasn't too good to be true and it has worked like a dream for my brother. This guy is basically offering me the same opportunity. Only difference is I'm not taking an entire agency with me and will have to bust my ass right out of the gate and fast to get back to my earnings now.

[covergirl82]

Weekend: Busy (but good)!! DS had a baseball tournament in a town about an hour away. They won the game they played on Friday afternoon, won the first game on Saturday and lost the second, and then lost the first game on Sunday. He was bummed, but both games they lost were close and they played well, but the other teams were just a little better. After the game on Sunday we all went to the pool at a marina where one of the families rents a seasonal boat slip. Saturday afternoon DD had her end-of-the-year gymnastics show, and she did great. I don't anticipate she'll ever be a super-great gymnast, but she enjoys it and it's a great way for her to stay active all year.

Celebration: Countdown to vacation - I'm looking forward to our week-long vacation next week. We're camping in the town where my parents grew up and where they have a "cottage" (my grandpa's house he gave to my mom when he passed away). I am so excited to go to the beach, mini golfing, going to the ice cream place, watching the parade, and spending time with family.

Celebration 2: DD slept the ENTIRE night last night in her own bed. That hasn't happened in months. She usually ends up coming down to our room to a makeshift bed I have on the floor next to my side of the bed.

Random: I'm actually going to miss DS playing in his travel baseball league a bit. I loved watching him play and the coaches, kids, and families were seriously the best. Tryouts for next year's team are the end of July (I'm assuming so their skills are still fresh), and I hope they keep the same coaches and kids together (as much as possible).

[186momx]

Celebration: DD and I had a great girls weekend. She listened and didn't whine, we had tons of fun, did a ton of stuff, and just had a relaxing weekend. DD already asked me when daddy was going to go away so we could do it again. Saturday morning we had a lazy morning curled up in my bed, ate in bed, watched some TV, and just chilled until 11. WPs that is the latest I've stayed in bed since I can remember.

Vent: Eye doctor gave DD a prescription for +.50 for reading glasses. I'm tempted to not get the glasses as the eye doc said it was just to help temporarily while her eyes get strong enough to read the smaller fonts. Her vision was 20/25.

Vent: DH came home just in time to eat dinner. He brought home all his elephants and stress and the entire evening was pretty miserable. He seemed really upset that DD and I had so much without him.

[twinmomma]

I'm in awe. Can't tell if this is a celebration or a vent or both. But DH had his physical today and talked to our primary care about therapy and how he's been feeling and how I've been feeling and our relationship. She gave recommendations for us to each see our own therapist and then go to marriage counseling and gave him a bunch of info. He seems like he's all in on it. I'm just.... in shock. I've been telling him that I think therapy would help him and us, but I never thought he'd actually go through with it.

ETA - vent because I just feel... strange I guess? that he told her all about me too and not just himself. 

[mae0111]

One more celebration: I went to pick up DD's final report card today. It was the last day of school for the district, but she has been out for the past week due to all the drama. I'm so relieved to be DONE with that school. We are on to better things!

One amusing part of my experience today... the principal saw me through the window in the front door of the school, waiting to be buzzed in. She made eye contact, dropped her head, and ran away from the door. It is clear that we are not friends. :-)

[erinshelley21]

twinmomma, take the win and look at it as a celebration only. You are a big part of his life so he can't really talk about his life and feelings without talking about you, good or bad.

[twinmomma]

erinshelley21, Oh, I know. And that's definitely the way I'm leaning. It's just a strange feeling to know he talked about me there. We have the same PCP so she knows me well too, which is good.

And she also wants us to get both kids evaluated for ADHD. I'm not at all surprised, especially with DD2. But damn. That's a lot to process out of a quick yearly physical.

[ilovelucyvv]

Vent: I went on a trip to Ottawa, Canada for work last week and had one of the worst airport experiences I had in a long time, both coming and going. Cancelled flight, delayed departures, late night arrivals, losing my luggage... the works. That being said I believe these experiences were a good reminder for me to better prepare for when the kids, H, and I travel to Disney this fall. If any of this happened with the kids it would have been disaster X1000.

Celebration: We are travelling to see my BFF for a long weekend this weekend. She has a newly 1 year old daughter that I haven't met yet. I am really looking forward to it, just a little nervous of my friend's no screens policy and how exactly that is going to sit with my kids who have two extremes: running around like crazy people or calmly watching a screen.

[mommyatty]

We are on vacation. That’s the celebration.

Vent: We are never bringing my mother in law with us again. Ever. Like if DH wants to take his mom on vacation, I will go elsewhere with the kids. She can’t handle the heat in South Carolina, which is 15-20 degrees cooler than where we live. And she constantly acts like our having the kids out in the heat is child abuse. They are KIDS. They don’t even notice the heat. Yes, their faces are a little pink. Stop effing fanning them and using that “I’m a saint saving you from your negligent parents” voice to ask if they want some water. And quit taking them in air conditioning every chance you get. Also, she bitches about EVERYTHING. “I think those people who have their food were seated after we were.” “They could have seated us out of the sun.” “I just could not take sitting in the sun on that boat where you were sitting.” Yesterday she and I took the kids to the beach. Kids wanted to be in the water. I finally had to physically take our beach bags off her arm and say “Put our stuff down. No one will bother it.” And she wouldn’t sit down. I don’t know why. She didn’t want to take a beach chair because we would have to carry it. Today I carried one for her. She sat in it for a few minutes.

She just had a dithering fit because apparently one of her fake nails is coming off. She told DH is he can take her there, she can walk the mile back. Yeah fucking right. Not unless the mile is air conditioned. But I have a feeling she’s going to try because DH needed to come back here because I had to get on a work call that is now rescheduled to tomorrow.

Moral Victory: I have not physically assaulted my mother in law.

[sdlaura]

ilovelucyvv my older two kids only have those two modes as well. Our good friends are funny about screens and we’re having them over for a party this weekend. I already texted to ask if we could let the kids watch a movie for an hour as a break from swimming. I’m having steamed crabs sent cross country from Maryland and I want to eat them for an hour in peace. Luckily they said yes!

[sandandsea]

Dh finally made it home from his 8 turned 9 day work trip to China. The flight home was cancelled after a 3+ hour tarmac stay for mechanical issues so he found another flight and was only 24 hours delayed. Though he was totally jet lagged and slept all day yesterday which annoyed me.

We are remodeling our master bathroom in 4 weeks and still haven’t ordered the shower door, looked at bathroom doors, found a counter or sinks or cabinet hardware or shower trim. It’s feeling like a lot of open ends right now.

[rere]

mommyatty, It seems I have told this story before, about my mother in law on vacation at Gulf Shores. She asks 1000000 stupid questions a day, gripes all week about not being able to smoke, spends all morning on the balcony where I would like to read my phone and eat my breakfast and starts on her 100000 stupid questions. BIL finally snips at her and she goes off to where they are in a physical altercation and pulls SIL hair. DH and I pack up a day early and leave at 9 PM and on the way out the door, she asks if she can sleep in my bed and which one was mine and my response was I don't give a damn. Good times. Never again.

[186momx]

mommyatty, I'm so sorry. Can you just leave her back at your room and go off without her. Beach vacation means beach time and last time I checked beaches didn't have AC. Don't kill her and try to have fun.

ilovelucyvv, I used to be no screen. DD didn't watch any until almost 3 and then it was short time frames. My reason was DH is addicted to TV and needs the stimulation it brings and I didn't want DD to develop that same addiction. She watches more TV now but it usually is all crammed into one day. I don't see why your BFF should have an issue with your kids watching a movie while her LO is down napping. Everyone needs downtime.

DD has gymnastic camp this week. I can't drop off until 8:30 so I start my work day an hour early and have to leave 15 minutes early to pick her up. We had eggs and toast for breakfast today. I wish I could do this later start all the time.

[mustardseed2007]

Well...we had a nice weekend until sunday evening when DD went under water at a swim party while I was sitting on the side of the pool. I dove in and pulled her out but she threw up water and it was basically the most terrifying moment of my life. And the only person at the party who even realized it happened was the lady I was chatting with when I turned my head and saw DD struggling. DS didn't even realize it was happening and he was standing next to her but his head was turned. So. She's never swimming again. Or...maybe swim lessons every single day...

[helenahhandbasket]

justcheckingin73, I went down to OBX in my early 20s with some friends and had such a great time. We just chilled on the beach, ate, drank and slept in. It's one of my fondest memories from that time period. I would love to go back down there with DD so I am glad to hear you had a good time with kids in tow.

OMG mustardseed2007, That is one of my biggest fears because I can't really swim myself. I am glad she is OK. DD has been in swim lessons since September and is doing pretty well so she might have to save me one day, lol.

I am eating my feelings today because after having what I though was a good phone interview with my old company last week, I received a rejection email today. I am sure my old witchy boss had something to do with it, so I am licking my wounds today. I am stuck here for the foreseeable future, I think.

[campermom]

Celebrations: my first work conference away in like...6 years and it was awesome. Kind of want to do that every year now.

I’m officially off for summer break. I have to work one full week in July and another day in August, but my favorite time of the year has officially begun!

I hosted my parents surprise party Saturday with the 76 person guest list. The weather called for thunderstorms but held off for us and it was beautiful and even sunny! Everyone loved the patio. We had a tent on the driveway, and a huge easy up and pub tables and plenty of seating. There was mingling and cornhole and basketball and spray chalk and playground time for the kids. We had 2 kegs and lots and lots and lots of food. It was the best party I’ve ever hosted. So much fun!

But omg so much work days and days of work. My house is almost back to normal and we are having DDs bday party this coming weekend!

[traveltheworld]

We had a good weekend until I took the kids grocery shopping, DS was pushing the cart with DD in it and must have tilted it somehow, causing the cart to fall forward, with DD hitting the floor face first. There was so much blood. I thought she must have broken her nose or suffered a concussion. So that started a few hours of urgent care, x-rays and me basically feeling like the worst parent ever. I mean, who lets their 5 year old push a shopping cart with her 3 year old in it and not pay attention?

Luckily nothing seems to be broken. Her poor little face is swollen, but hopefully that's it.

[mustardseed2007]

traveltheworld, OMG! But would NEVER expect that to happen! She didn't even jump out or anything, it just fell over!?! That's nuts!