I'm up, drinking coffee, ate breakfast, walked down by the creek, still waiting for the kids and Dh to get out of bed. Yesterday we took a jeep ride, with a clearly insane driver, to the top of a mountain. The kids said it was the best thing ever. The view was amazing. We could see Kansas, Nebraska and Wyoming
Today, over the continental divide to hike, have a picnic lunch, and see the sights.
Post by supertrooper1 on Jul 9, 2018 8:40:14 GMT -5
The weekend didn't go quite as planned at home. DH rented a genie lift that was supposed to be delivered on Friday so he could paint the high parts of our house over the weekend. The company was behind on their deliveries and it won't be delivered until today. Our pull out spray nozzle for our kitchen sink sprang a leak on Saturday and DH couldn't get the right parts, so a plumber is coming today. It's amazing how difficult it's been without a kitchen sink. I'm still trying to recover from my lack of sleep due to my 16 hour shift on Friday. Four more work days until I'm on vacation and it can't get here soon enough.
We got home from vacation late Saturday night, so yesterday was spent kind of getting back into the swing of things and getting the kiddos home. I missed them! And then DH seemed to completely self-sabotage all the progress we had made. He hasn't been drinking, which is a good thing. He doesn't drink to the point of getting drunk, but does have at least 2-3 drinks a night, which seems excessive to me on a regular basis given a strong family history of alcohol abuse. Anyway... we went to a cookout with his folks and he immediately poured himself a drink and disappeared onto the porch all night. We barely spoke all day. After we got home, he decided to go hang out with friends and didn't get home until 6 AM. I told him that would happen and he assured me that it wouldn't. I was adamant that it would, because I know him. And then he did exactly that. I'm hurt and furious and feeling like our entire trip was bullshit.
On Saturday, we had our annual birthdays party to celebrate DH, DD, and my birthday. The weather was beautiful and the kids had fun playing in the pool. Then my parents took DD and DS1 for a sleepover. On Sunday, I slept in and then went for a massage. We visited my in-laws and met my parents for dinner.
MIL came home from the hospital on Friday. She is getting home hopsice care. By Sunday morning, FIL was overwhelmed. MIL was in pain during the night and FIL was afraid to give her pain meds since she has a bad reaction to narcotics (they make her crazy). He finally relented after hospice told him to give her a low dose. But FIL has only slept 2 hours all weekend. He's so worried about her eating and drinking since she is diabetic too. Hospice is supposed to come 6 days/week for the new few weeks, so I hope they can help reduce his anxiety. Then I had a heartbreaking conversation with the kids last night to tell them that their Grammie is very sick and will not get better and die sometime soon. I tried to gauge their understanding on what death is by asking them some questions, but didn't get very far. I think DD was upset because I was crying as I told them. DH also told them about how Grammie is sleeping a lot and may not look the same and to ask questions if they were scared. DH is going to be spending a lot of time at his parents' house and he'll have to take the kids with them, so we wanted to prepare them as best as we could.
polecat8 Hospice should be able to figure out the right cocktail for your MIL. Their only concern is comfort, so a lot of the regulations on meds are waived when they get involved.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Jul 9, 2018 9:23:48 GMT -5
We had a nice weekend. I got my large bike workout done, which was good. My first medium distance race is officially 8 weeks away.
ETA: Posted too soon
I don't think I posted this before, but DH got the job with the new judge that is replacing the retiring one he works for, so he gets to continue doing what he's doing. It's such a relief. I know we would have been fine as a family is he hadn't gotten that job, but he would have been so depressed.
Saturday was nice - after my bike ride I got to play games with the kids - DS is ridiculously good at checkers - and we randomly watched the wizard of oz, which is now their favorite movie ever.
Sunday was shaping up to be similarly lazy plus rainy, so I took the kids for a hair cut, barnes n noble (since it's close by) and ice cream.
Nice low key weekend. Which is good b/c DH is going to be tied up all next weekend and it's going to be just me. Which is going to be nutso!
Celebration: We had a great week of vacation. The campground was really nice - great pool, and overall clean and quiet. The kids loved it and we made a reservation to go back the week of the 4th of July next year. The kids also surprised us by showing much improved swimming skills - they both now put their faces in the water. DD hasn't gotten the arm motions down yet, but DS was doing pretty well with the front crawl. We ate at our favorite restaurants and got ice cream at least 4 times. We also got to spend time with my parents and favorite aunts and uncle.
Random: DD complained of a tummy ache on and off most of the week. A friend of my parents who is a doctor mentioned abdominal migraines, which is possible given that DH and DS get migraines. So I made an appointment at the pedi for this Friday to see what might be going on.
Vent (sorry it's long): My sister was a total B on the 4th. She sat in the living room doing work while the family visited, which was no big deal until DD complained of a tummy ache after lunch and sat in the chair my sister had been sitting in, which had a fan blowing on it, while DH got an ice pack and I got her some water. My sister got all mad that DD sat in "her" chair and promptly went and holed up in "her" room at the cottage. I took DS to the parade (only a block away, so a quick walk) and we were there 10 minutes and my sister "accidently" sends me a text (that she later claimed she meant to send to a friend) about how much her family irritates her and she can't leave because her car is blocked in. Well, she's the one who gets to park in a special spot (a paved section of the gated backyard) and because we had family over, DH's truck and my parents' truck were parked in front of the gate. If she thought she might want to leave, she could have easily asked to switch parking spots with DH or our parents. Not to mention that DH was still at the cottage with DD when she sent that bitchy text and she could've easily just politely asked DH to move his truck so she could leave. I was so mad about it, I showed my mom the text later. My sister acts like the world revolves around her and is so mean to our parents. I can't stand it. I had a talk with my mom about it the evening of the 4th, and thankfully one of my aunts participated in the conversation to help provide perspective that my sister was being a total B. My parents have often been very accommodating to my sister's awful behavior because apparently when she was 16 she mentioned suicidal thoughts at a summer camp. After that she went into counseling and we had to do family counseling, which was basically the therapist telling me and my parents how awful we were in how we treated my sister and we needed to be nicer to her, etc. Anyway, she's 38 now and unmarried, no kids, so she's used to leading a very self-centered lifestyle now. I told my parents that I would like them to give me my mom's 50% share of her mom's farm and my sister can have the cottage. (ETA: The other 50% of the farm is my uncle's, and he's passing it to one of his kids, and she lives in CA. Because she's so far away, there's a chance she might be willing to sell it to me and DH. But I don't foresee a lot of issues with sharing the property with her, if she's not interested in selling her share.) There's no way we'd be able to share anything with her. I did ask my parents if they would put a stipulation in the will that once my sister is gone, the cottage goes to DS and DD so that it stays in the family. It sounds like my parents are agreeable to this arrangement, so hopefully they update their will to reflect it.
Anyway, later my sister emerges from her room all packed, and of course our mom begs her to stay. Then my sister goes into how she was mad because she had to work on a holiday (like she's the only one who's ever had to do that?) and is unhappy at work because she feels she got passed up for a promotion to a management-level role (like she's the only one who's ever been unhappy at a job and felt passed over?). (Apparently she doesn't show her bitch-side at work, so it apparently wasn't due to personality.) I didn't think her excuse was genuine, and she never actually apologized. I'm still mad about it.
@ploecat8 - I am so sorry. I hope they get to a solution that is better for FIL.
Vent: me being judgmental - a baby baptized on Sunday was given an iPhone to watch during the service. It just blew my mind. Take a fussy baby out, but a screen? It just really struck me, after seeing iPhone holders for baby buckets for the first time this weekend, too, and being stressed about my kids’ screen time because of summer and my work insanity.
DH was awful this weekend. And this week. He’s not in a good place mentally, and is being super passive aggressive - like putting photos of us face down around the house and putting steak knives point up in the sink. Just super jerky. He’s away for work this week and I am so super relieved. I can’t take his “I am so busy and important” speeches. He had a moment of lucidity on Sunday morning and pulled me aside to tell me he’s sorry for being selfish. On some level he gets it but he seems compelled to be ... just demanding, demeaning and mean. He spent all of July 4th telling anyone who would listen that I didn’t water the flowers every day the week of VBS (work 9 hour days plus three hours every evening of VBS). It was awkward and weird. Yesterday he started in on it again and middle DD told him to try to be nice because I do a lot and does he not see that? I wish I could talk to his doctor and therapist and get him scheduled for a standing Friday evening or Saturday appointment.
Weekend was okay. DD had a blast playing in our new pool both days. We went to see Incredibles 2 Sunday, DD got really scared during it so I ended up having her curled up on my lap. This is her 2nd movie at the theater and now she is afraid to go again but really wants to see Hotel Transylvania 3.
DH was a pill Thursday night. Went to work on Friday and came home all happy and accommodating. All weekend he wanted to go off and do stuff all weekend and didn't want to stay home and do house work. I did get him to finish chopping up the rounds that have been sitting in the driveway for 9 months and it actually got put away.
DD didn't want to go to Ad Club today. She also didn't want to go last week. She has no issues with it as before/after care so not sure what is up. Next week she is at gym camp all week so doesn't have another day at Ad Club until the 23rd. She also is constantly talking about going back to school and being in Mrs. J's class again and what is she doing and does she miss her. Would it be a bad idea to try and set up a "coffee date" with Mrs. J for DD?
covergirl82 - he’s being a giant jerk. He literally views anything as “not his job” as my nitpicking. I asked him not to put plates full of food in the sink so he stacked them beside it then threw the utensils in that way. And overall, he’s bigtime on a kick that we ask too much of him - because he’s so busy and you know, doing dishes (or putting them in the dishwasher) he uses is too much. He’s also back to pulling only his clothes from the dirty clothes and leaving mine, which takes more effort to sort! It’s things like that — make me insane.
I painted the bathroom and I love it! And now I want to paint all the rooms.
I put DH I’m charge of buying the paint... $60 for two pints!!!! But a matte finish for the bathroom and the coverage is great.
Benjamin Moore - how I love/hate you.
We started getting paint from Home Depot. Then I experienced Benjamin Moore and Sherwin Williams. Now I’m a total paint snob. I probably wouldn’t notice if I wasn’t the person actually painting. But the quality difference is remarkable.
Post by erinshelley21 on Jul 9, 2018 11:32:19 GMT -5
It's the last full, official week of the summer busy season!!!!!!! The deadline in early next week and we'll have some stragglers to meet with but it's almost over. I started thinking about saying good-bye to one of my clients and got a little teary eyed. There are a few that I'm going to miss but if I go work at the company I'm interviewing with tomorrow I'll still get to work with a few of them and if I sell insurance still I can still tag along with my brother and hopefully work with the few of them still.
DD's sleep is pure crap. I got 4.5 hours Saturday night and then I was up with her for an hour last night. She's 16 months old today so I think it's time to cut out the MOTN comforting and it's going to have to be cold turkey.
Post by traveltheworld on Jul 9, 2018 11:40:00 GMT -5
We had DS's birthday party, 19 kids in all. I think the kids had fun, though I think 2 hours was too long. I started counting down the minutes about an hour in. I made a giant jug of sangria, but because I knew I probably had to work, didn't even get to drink it. I then worked from 8 pm. to 11 p.m., but forgot to put the sangria in the fridge, so it was warm by the time I got to it. That made me sad.
On the positive note, I think DS had a blast. We had also previously talked about not keeping all the gifts for himself and donating some to charity, and this morning I came downstairs to find him sitting in front of pile of presents agonizing over which presents to keep. I appreciated the fact that even though he was obviously struggling with the decision, he still held true to his word and is only keeping 4 of the 15 presents he got. He then told me to put the other ones away in a big bag and store them in the basement until we go take them to the local fire station to give away, because "if I see them around too much, it'd be too tempting to open them."
We had a nice, low key weekend. Most of the neighbors were gone so it was really nice having the kids and our yard to ourselves for a change. I took our two oldest girls to the pool yesterday and we had so much fun together. DD1 is quite the fish and passed the deep swim test at camp so she showed me how she can jump off the diving board and swim across the pool. I was still a nervous wreck and not entirely comfortable with it, she just turned 6 but she did awesome. She then jumped on my back and said we're koala bears. DD2 put on her goggles and kept showing me how she can go all the way underwater and jump in by herself. I bought them popsicles after and we came home to DH grilling with DD3 in tow. It was a seriously good day for my soul.
Add me to the list of paint snobs. I will buy cheaper paint if it is for a small area but a big project its the good Sherwin Williams stuff. My neighbor needs his house painted and I kind of told him if his sister who owns the house wants to DIY I would help out. I actually love to paint the outside of a house and see it all new and shiny looking. My house won't need to be painted for another 3-5 years so I have a while still.
Our local home improvement store sells Benjamin Moore and sometimes has mail in rebates, ahh paint.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Jul 9, 2018 12:20:05 GMT -5
I can't fathom painting my own home. Is it really actually easy to do? It seems so hard to me. We really need to paint our house. And we need to repaint our cabinets.
Question about painting cabinets: I'd always heard you need to use a sprayer or it won't stick. But ours is peeling in some places. Was it a bad paint job? can I fix it with a paint brush or does it need to be sprayed?
2chatter, leaving knives up purposely in the sink sounds really unhinged. Sorry you are dealing with that.
I was PMSing pretty hardcore on Saturday. It was slightly better on Sunday at least enough to be more functional, so we rallied and had a fabulous time at the pool. There were some boys there that were friends with DS and DD, but DS moreso. We were there for 3 hours! And when we got home DS crawled into bed and fell asleep at like 5:30. I had to really try hard to get him back out of bed for dinner.
Since I have trouble with planning the weekends, not making plans but I don't know just time in general or getting DH and I on the same page for the weekends, I read something that was helpful for me. It was think of the weekends as 7 blocks of time. Friday night- which is usually our pizza and movie night. Sat morning, Sat afternoon, Sat evening. Sun morning, Sun afternoon, Sun evening. For some reason the author just spelling it out for me that way makes it easy for me to say Our Sun afternoon plans are the pool. Instead of we will go to the pool, maybe on Sunday depending.... I don't know why but it makes a difference in the way I think about it. Because you think about the weekend and you think it is really short because you have 2 days to do everything- all the chores, but then when you are in the actual days they are long for various reasons, but not because you are having tons of fun.
Random: I had originally planned to be gone Mon-Thurs of this week. I forgot Wednesday is DD’s birthday. I suck. Luckily I changed so I’m only gone Mon-Tues.
Post by justcheckingin73 on Jul 9, 2018 12:22:50 GMT -5
It was a good weekend. Friday we went to SILs to celebrate my MILs birthday. It was fun and we got to see her new house which they are working on updating.
DH wanted to stain the deck which needed to be done but it meant missing out on one of the most gorgeous weekends we’ve had this summer for pool time.
Yesterday, I went for a 5 mile run and then took DS to a park nearby that has a zip line. I felt very out of place amongst the much younger parents and kids. It’s been probably 3 years since I’ve taken him to this park, which despite the zip line, is mostly for the younger set.
By Sunday night I was completely depleted, feeling like I hadn’t gotten any time to myself. Tonight DH has a softball game so I may put DS to bed early and do some reading which I was wanting to do all weekend.
I can't fathom painting my own home. Is it really actually easy to do? It seems so hard to me. We really need to paint our house. And we need to repaint our cabinets.
Question about painting cabinets: I'd always heard you need to use a sprayer or it won't stick. But ours is peeling in some places. Was it a bad paint job? can I fix it with a paint brush or does it need to be sprayed?
You would need paint specific to cabinets. My mom used a cabinet kit, but that is because she was painting on top of a 70's coating. If it is peeling you probably would have to do some sanding. It really depends on the finish of the cabinets. I have re-done some furniture that it did not come out that great because of the coating, and some that were more like just wood that came out really well with a paintbrush.
Post by justcheckingin73 on Jul 9, 2018 12:25:19 GMT -5
waverly - I love that block idea! I have a hard time planning weekends too since I either plan nothing or go overboard and feel like I have to account for every single hour. It completely changes when you think about it that way.
waverly - I love that block idea! I have a hard time planning weekends too since I either plan nothing or go overboard and feel like I have to account for every single hour. It completely changes when you think about it that way.
That is how I am too. I plan nothing or everything. I have gotten better at one social event per weekend.
But a lot of times I would reach out to friends after not seeing a bunch of them for a few months or whatever chunk of time, and they all have availability on the same weekend. So it was like no friends for a month, then a weekend of 3 friend get togethers.
Also, I am the worst, but instead of setting up playdates because that can get a bit difficult, I just go to the neighborhood pool and see who is there. Most times it is just someone I know that I talk to for 10 minutes, but sometimes it is the kid's friends. It wouldn't have worked as a playdate because the mom had to leave the pool super early on to travel for work and only the dad was there, but as a spontaneous get together it was fine because zero expectations. And actually the mom is a bit of an awkward conversationalist than the dad, so that part worked out fine too because we could talk if we wanted to or not talk because we could be at different parts of the pool with no expectations for conversation.
Post by traveltheworld on Jul 9, 2018 12:38:19 GMT -5
waverly, I really like the blocks of time idea. Our problem is that mornings are usually a bust. Despite the kids getting up at 7, we never make it out of the house till 10/10:30. They just take so long doing....I don't even know what.
I'm also getting anxious because I feel like I'm missing summer. So typical of me - stressing about not having enough fun is making me more stressed.
waverly , I really like the blocks of time idea. Our problem is that mornings are usually a bust. Despite the kids getting up at 7, we never make it out of the house till 10/10:30. They just take so long doing....I don't even know what.
I'm also getting anxious because I feel like I'm missing summer. So typical of me - stressing about not having enough fun is making me more stressed.
I guess you plan the mornings as a bust or as coffee time etc., maybe.
Yeah those summer checklists or whatever summer bucket list make me feel more stressed. I am like oh I missed picking fruit which is really only strawberries here or apples in the fall. Despite the fact that none of us really has a strong desire to actually pick fruit, I feel like we should and then we miss it and it makes me more stressed.
I definitely feel a bit stressed especially coming back from vacation, post vacation blues to the 4th being in the middle of the week (two Mondays) and a lot of other stuff going on, and summer feels like it is half over. The kids go back Aug 15, and the pool closes pretty soon after that.
I just love this season so much, and it feels so short because it really is. Winter here is like 5 months and then we had a month of spring before it went to 80. And it gets dark so early in Oct. I don't think I am helping you that much with this lol. But I totally understand.
Even though I have another vacation planned and trying to do fun things and soak up the pool time its just never enough time to enjoy the nice weather and take vacations and weekend trips. We are trying to plan more weekend trips and week trips in the fall and winter, but its not the same. Like we went to St. Louis last winter, it was OK not the most fabulous weekend trip ever, and involved a harrowing 4 hour drive back in a snowstorm.