Good morning! Reminder that this is a post about non-diet related wellness. So no diet or intentional weight loss talk please. There is a regular thread on Married Life for that if you want it.
My anxiety was really high last week, so I scheduled an appointment with my therapist for this week. I also cleared some things off of my weekend schedule and took a break from a project that has been causing a lot of stress. I can get back to it now that I've had a couple of days break and I feel like I'm in a better head space.
I’m in a weird space right now and looking for advice/commiseration.
I was doing pretty well with intuitive eating for a few months, including over the holidays. I was proud of my choices and really beginning to trust myself again.
During the same time period, I’ve been battling a minor knee injury, and have had treatment and lots of physical therapy. Over the holidays I suffered a pretty big setback with my knee, and thought I’d bounce back from it, but I haven’t. Over the last few weeks my eating had gone to shit, and I feel like maybe I’m punishing my body for letting me down with this knee recovery. Or maybe I’m soothing my physical pain with food. Or both.
Does anyone have any experience or books/articles that might help me work through this? I’m not currently in therapy, and this is fairly new (3ish weeks), so I’d like to try to work through it on my own first if I can.
Post by Ashley&Scott on Feb 17, 2020 10:21:00 GMT -5
I've been on Zoloft for 3 months now. I had a med check with my doctor a few weeks ago. Overall, it has helped my mood & anxiety but I feel like the last few weeks I've been much more irritable. She said if I feel like I need it I can increase my dosage I can. This weekend I increased from 50mg to 75mg. I'm hoping this is the right amount for me, I know it will take a few weeks for it to work fully. I was hesitant to increase it but I decided that being angry & impatient wasn't fair to me or the people around me.
Post by seeyalater52 on Feb 17, 2020 10:23:48 GMT -5
My anxiety is at an all time high and my therapist is having some difficulty understanding why and being helpful. I can tell she thinks I’m a crazy person by her reactions to me and that just makes me feel self conscious and awful. In a lot of ways I know I just need to be patient with myself but I’m also feeling so distracted and burnt out all the time and I know that is showing up in lots of places in my life right now. I’m not my best self and I dont know how to deal with that right now.
I have a stressful week starting tomorrow. I also have the ortho and audiologist appts this week. I did it to myself, but also wtf self for scheduling everything together.
Post by Patsy Baloney on Feb 17, 2020 10:31:52 GMT -5
I am in a very good place right now. I was reflecting on that this morning - how good I have been feeling, how my stomach isn't killing me, how I feel hungry, eat, and am satisfied, etc. The only thing I wish I could do better on is movement, but I feel like I'd be sacrificing my very sparse downtime for that, and I'd likely not feel so mentally good without that downtime, no matter how short it may be. I'll graduate in May from my masters program and hope that will give me a little more time to play with.
The biggest indicator of my good place is that my house has been the pick-up hub for a food-based fundraiser. 753 boxes of sweets have come through my house already, and the fundraiser goes until March 22. I have a TERRIBLE sweet tooth and will binge sugar without a thought. I will eat something until I'm ill.
With this fundraiser, I bought myself a few treats and have been extremely intentional in how I've been eating them. I take the serving size. I sit at the table. I eat them slowly and enjoy them. I don't eat them until I'm sick. I haven't bought more to supply myself with endless sweets. I'm really proud.
At the beginning of the year, I decided to eliminate soda and caffeine for future health reasons and to break an addiction to caffeine and I have gone from 3 sodas a day to one a week.
This is the first goal I’ve ever actually set and stuck with, and I can’t tell you how proud of myself I am. It’s a weird feeling: being proud of myself.
Post by mrsukyankee on Feb 17, 2020 10:49:09 GMT -5
seeyalater52, if I were your therapist, I wouldn't think you were a crazy person. I'd be more frustrated with myself that I couldn't be more helpful. I hope that's what your therapist is actually feeling and it's coming across the wrong way (maybe your anxiety is having you read things with tinted glasses?). Hugs sent your way.
VillainV, when I had to have ACL reconstruction, I did a similar thing. I couldn't really do the exercising I wanted and was frustrated. What helped me was focusing on mindfulness. I did mindful eating and a few mindfulness exercises as well as doing anything I could do exercise wise that didn't hurt my knee (I found a machine at the gym/physio which I could use until I could use the bike better). Maybe that will help?
VillainV- I wish I had advice or good recommendations but I'm in the same boat. My arm/shoulder is hurt from an accident over 5 weeks ago and I've done *nothing* exercise related since because it hurts like a mofo. It's only in the past few years that I've come to peace that physical activity is important even though I never look like I work out as much as I do. My mental health is better and I listen better to what my body needs for fuel and pleasure when I'm active. You're definitely not alone. Big hugs.
seeyalater52, if I were your therapist, I wouldn't think you were a crazy person. I'd be more frustrated with myself that I couldn't be more helpful. I hope that's what your therapist is actually feeling and it's coming across the wrong way (maybe your anxiety is having you read things with tinted glasses?). Hugs sent your way.
I’m sure some of it is how I’m interpreting things. She just kept looking at me with these wide eyes and saying “wow, this is a lot. Are you always feeling like this? Is there any way you can not borrow trouble?” Like lady, if I could just will away my intense anxiety and PTSD don’t you think I’d just do that? I left there feeling like a freak of nature who doesn’t know how to be happy.
Post by mrsukyankee on Feb 17, 2020 10:56:22 GMT -5
seeyalater52, you aren't. She just didn't say things in a helpful way. I know I sometimes walk away from sessions smacking myself on the back of the head because of what I said. PTSD is tough to deal with and anxiety is a bitch. And sometimes it just takes some time to learn how your brain and body work best with it and dealing with it. Wish I could help you out!
Post by Patsy Baloney on Feb 17, 2020 10:59:54 GMT -5
seeyalater52, not to make light of how you are feeling, but the, "Is there any way you can not borrow trouble?" has me rolling. Well, why didn't I think of that?!
I hope you and your therapist get a little more in-sync and your sessions are more constructive in the future.
seeyalater52- Does she not understand PTSD? I don't think all therapists do and as a result say some not helpful things. I'm sorry that your anxiety is so high. It's an awful place to be.
I have been frustrated with acne for nearly 5 years and I finally went to the dermatologist last week. I've come to realize that this is really impacting my mental health and overall happiness. I don't want to spend so much mental and emotional energy worrying about it. When I was at the doctor, we discussed 3 prescriptions but she only sent 2 to the pharmacy. Getting ahold of an actual human in their office has been pulling teeth and I've been so frustrated all weekend. I cried twice. I'm nervous, excited, and dreading the "worse before it gets better" period.
The past two weeks have been hard. February is just...hard. It's so grey and I feel like I can't get out of the fog. I've sat in front of my SAD lamp when I had time, but there's not much else I can do.
The yoga/meditation program I started last week is going fairly well. I missed a practice last week because of depression (see previous statement about February), but I got all the meditations done. The program has encouraged me to eat a more diverse selection of fruits and vegetables and I've been enjoying that. I sometimes get stuck in a rut eating the same things over and over.
Half marathon training is...happening. I'm checking the boxes so far but I'm not that excited about running right now.
seeyalater52, not to make light of how you are feeling, but the, "Is there any way you can not borrow trouble?" has me rolling. Well, why didn't I think of that?!
I hope you and your therapist get a little more in-sync and your sessions are more constructive in the future.
Right??? 😂 It actually did make me laugh so I guess that’s one way to cure anxiety!
seeyalater52- Does she not understand PTSD? I don't think all therapists do and as a result say some not helpful things. I'm sorry that your anxiety is so high. It's an awful place to be.
I think that is a great point. No she isn’t very good with PTSD. Or some of the specific issues I’m seeing her for. Up until now I mostly liked her because she didn’t give me unsolicited medical advice, and I’m still glad she doesn’t. But I could kind of do without her sunny optimism currently bc I’m just not feeling it. I’ve had zero luck finding a better therapist and have fired 3 in 3 years so I know I need to stick with her even if it isn’t ideal.
seeyalater52- Does she not understand PTSD? I don't think all therapists do and as a result say some not helpful things. I'm sorry that your anxiety is so high. It's an awful place to be.
I think that is a great point. No she isn’t very good with PTSD. Or some of the specific issues I’m seeing her for. Up until now I mostly liked her because she didn’t give me unsolicited medical advice, and I’m still glad she doesn’t. But I could kind of do without her sunny optimism currently bc I’m just not feeling it. I’ve had zero luck finding a better therapist and have fired 3 in 3 years so I know I need to stick with her even if it isn’t ideal.
I apologize if this isn’t helpful, but have you asked her or your doctor about EMDR? It’s evidence-based therapy for PTSD that has had a lot of good results. Your insurance might cover it. I think it’s fine to talk to your current therapist about other treatment options that are beyond the scope of what she can provide. I know it’s a tough conversation, especially if you also have anxiety. If you ever communicate via text or email, you might consider bringing it up that way — might feel more comfortable than bringing it up in a session.
ETA: you can ask about other options and still see her for the stuff that she is good at. Seeking other options doesn’t have to mean that you’re dumping her as your therapist.
seeyalater52- I've seen a therapist who was trained in helping with PTSD and it was life changing. She didn't replace my talk therapy therapist but was so helpful in getting out of reliving the trauma which spiked my anxiety and round and round and round. You know... The PTSD therapist was more focused and shorter term than my talk therapist.
I apologize if this isn’t helpful, but have you asked her or your doctor about EMDR?
EMDR was the best thing I did for my PTSD. I'm not going to lie it was hard going through it, but I had a major breakthrough and for me it was life changing. I still don't quite understand HTF it works but it did!
I've really been struggling with my depression for the last few years and with finding the right medication combination for me.
Since the new year I've upped my exercise and OMG I notice such a difference. I'm too nervous to wean off my Cymbalta (the brain zaps are killer for me) but I feel like I am finally in a better place. I haven't physically seen much results yet but emotionally it has been huge.
Post by amberlyrose on Feb 17, 2020 13:06:31 GMT -5
I notice I like running when I'm not doing a training plan. We took the dog for a long walk and I jogged quite a bit of it. It felt nice My goal this week is to find a new therapist. I've gone without one for so long and I really need to get a handle on my mental health while work is a little slower.
I just started listening to "UnFu*k Yourself" on my solo walks with the dog. A good friend also just came out with a mindfulness podcast that I'm adding to my list as well.
Post by secretlyevil on Feb 17, 2020 13:12:50 GMT -5
Last week, there was a last straw event at work. It just showed me that I am not going to be successful here no matter what I do. I really didn’t want to throw a job search in the mix of everything else going on but a job listing came up, someone reached out to me about it and the last straw happened. I decided the universe was literally flashing a neon sign. I have an interview at 5 pm for it. I am focusing on keeping myself calm all day and not stressing about it. Easier said than done but paying attention to my watch and actually getting up and moving when I get the alert is really helping. I’ve already hit my step goal for the day so some positive affirmation from Garmin was a nice bonus earlier.
Long term, I am still listening to Fuck It Diet, sporadically working in my Zen as Fuck book and overall fighting the negative self talk that I seem to be at champion-level. I always knew that but voicing it and consciously negating it is a whole other thing.
I notice I like running when I'm not doing a training plan. We took the dog for a long walk and I jogged quite a bit of it. It felt nice :) My goal this week is to find a new therapist. I've gone without one for so long and I really need to get a handle on my mental health while work is a little slower.
I just started listening to "UnFu*k Yourself" on my solo walks with the dog. A good friend also just came out with a mindfulness podcast that I'm adding to my list as well.
Some of my most enjoyable runs were ones where I didn’t set a timer or pay attention to my pace or my distance — I just ran and enjoyed it.
katfco , that's AMAZING. Getting rid of soda is so hard. I've tried several times and not been able to hang on. Good for you!
my biggest worry is that I'll be going along great and then let myself slide backward. I'm great at rationalizing myself right back into old habits before I've even broken them. One positive side effect is that I've started having more smoothies in the morning instead of stopping at Tim Horton's for my usual breakfast sandwich, soda and occasional donut. I've saved money, too.
My goal after this is to start gradually incorporating exercise in. Maybe one win will give me the encouragement I need.
seeyalater52, if I were your therapist, I wouldn't think you were a crazy person. I'd be more frustrated with myself that I couldn't be more helpful. I hope that's what your therapist is actually feeling and it's coming across the wrong way (maybe your anxiety is having you read things with tinted glasses?). Hugs sent your way.
I’m sure some of it is how I’m interpreting things. She just kept looking at me with these wide eyes and saying “wow, this is a lot. Are you always feeling like this? Is there any way you can not borrow trouble?” Like lady, if I could just will away my intense anxiety and PTSD don’t you think I’d just do that? I left there feeling like a freak of nature who doesn’t know how to be happy.
Has she been helpful before? Because as a fellow anxiety sufferer, a mental health professional suggesting that my "solution" was essentially to just stop thinking about things that make me anxious would make me want to kick something. If it was that easy I wouldn't be on antianxiety meds and seeking help, thanks.
I recently switched PCPs for an insurance switch which is coinciding with me thinking incidentally that I need to up the dose of my antianxiety med (which is also an antidepressant and has helped me in that area as well). I am nervous the new doctor will not be accommodating of a refill, let alone upping the dose. No specific reason why other than I am new and I am worried about the possibility she may not want to carry over a prescription of this nature without knowing me, especially since I am not currently seeing a therapist due to difficulty finding one.
I’m sure some of it is how I’m interpreting things. She just kept looking at me with these wide eyes and saying “wow, this is a lot. Are you always feeling like this? Is there any way you can not borrow trouble?” Like lady, if I could just will away my intense anxiety and PTSD don’t you think I’d just do that? I left there feeling like a freak of nature who doesn’t know how to be happy.
Has she been helpful before? Because as a fellow anxiety sufferer, a mental health professional suggesting that my "solution" was essentially to just stop thinking about things that make me anxious would make me want to kick something. If it was that easy I wouldn't be on antianxiety meds and seeking help, thanks.
I recently switched PCPs for an insurance switch which is coinciding with me thinking incidentally that I need to up the dose of my antianxiety med (which is also an antidepressant and has helped me in that area as well). I am nervous the new doctor will not be accommodating of a refill, let alone upping the dose. No specific reason why other than I am new and I am worried about the possibility she may not want to carry over a prescription of this nature without knowing me, especially since I am not currently seeing a therapist due to difficulty finding one.
Yeah I kind if wanted to punch her, which is a reaction I get a lot with therapists but I havent had that experience with her yet. I wouldnt say she’s extremely helpful but it’s better than not having a therapist and between my stupid narrow network and the insane waitlists and therapists not accepting new patients I feel really stuck. I haven’t been able to find anyone who does EMDR who takes my insurance and right now paying OOP isn’t an option.