I don’t really know what to call this but I feel like I spend waaay too much time on my phone. I find myself reaching for it absentmindedly, scrolling through fb or internet looking at nothing, etc.
I’m embarrassed about it and I don’t want my kids to see me and think this is ok.
Does anyone have tips for me? I have tried using the limits the iPhone offers but honestly I just click the button to give me more time when the limit is activated. I turn off all notifications so they don’t pop up but I still look at the phone all of the time - checking for emails, text messages, etc.
I realize it’s ironic to ask for this help here, where I’m using my phone, but not sure where else to get info?
Post by icedcoffee on Feb 24, 2020 10:08:02 GMT -5
I think most of us here are guilty of it. I'd recommend getting an Apple watch. I can leave my phone in another room and not worry about an important text or phone call because I'll see it on my watch. It has helped me use my phone less. When it does happen now it's usually because I'm bored of whatever my kid is doing. LOL So...it doesn't fix that, but if my phone isn't in the room I can't play on it!
I think most of us here are guilty of it. I'd recommend getting an Apple watch. I can leave my phone in another room and not worry about an important text or phone call because I'll see it on my watch. It has helped me use my phone less. When it does happen now it's usually because I'm bored of whatever my kid is doing. LOL So...it doesn't fix that, but if my phone isn't in the room I can't play on it!
I think most of us here are guilty of it. I'd recommend getting an Apple watch. I can leave my phone in another room and not worry about an important text or phone call because I'll see it on my watch. It has helped me use my phone less. When it does happen now it's usually because I'm bored of whatever my kid is doing. LOL So...it doesn't fix that, but if my phone isn't in the room I can't play on it!
I can not afford an Apple Watch
I get it. They are absurdly expensive. You can get a series 3 for under $200 (I know it's still crazy), but someone else might be able to recommend a cheaper option like a fit bit. I just don't have any experience with them to recommend one over another. I just know it did help me use my phone less around my kids.
I think your best bet is leaving the phone in the other room. Maybe just turn up the volume so you can hear if a call or text comes through.
I agree that being able to see notifications without having the phone nearby really limits the impulse to look at it while not feeling like you're going to miss something actually important. Doesn't have to be an Apple watch- there are other less expensive smartwatches out there. I have an Android phone, and a Garmin smartwatch that shows me notifications from my phone. My particular watch is in the $150-200 range, but DH has a different Garmin one that's <$100, or ~$50 if you get the previous year's model.
I listened to the book “How to Break Up With Your Phone” and my plan is to delete apps that pull me in the most and start doing 24 hour periods where I turn it off completely.
She also talks about figuring out why you are doing it - so for boredom have something else to fill the time. A book, hobby, etc. She also suggests challenging yourself to not pull it out in a waiting room or other Situation like that. I’ve also set it so that most apps won’t work with cell data so my options are pretty limited away from home.
When I need a break from my phone, I delete the apps that I spend the most time on. I never log into an actual computer (unless I am at work) so while I might reach for my phone a million times, once I grab it I put it back down because there is nothing to look at. It really helps kind of break the cycle, and also really drives home how often I reach for my phone.
Post by goldengirlz on Feb 24, 2020 10:25:45 GMT -5
I’m terrible at this too, but I’ve found that for it to stick, I need to replace phone time with something else. So I carry around a book instead of my phone (yes, even inside my house ... bonus: I read a lot more!) I also set rules for myself: no phones in restaurants, no phones at the dinner table, no phones an hour before bed, etc. Small, measurable goals.
You are probably asking the wrong group, lol. I am definitely addicted to the internet, if not my phone specifically. It is a real struggle with my productivity when the world is at my fingertips to distract me.
For the phone specifically, what if you turned on the sound and assigned a notification sound to calls/texts, but then put the phone in a specific place out of reach and only looked at it when you hear the notification? I do find that if I leave my phone out of reach at home, I'm much less likely to go out of my way to grab it and mindlessly scroll. It is also very rare that when my H and I are both home that I truly even need to answer a call or text immediately, so even if I couldn't hear a notification I might leave my phone out of reach. Not sure if your specific situation would allow that or not.
Otherwise I think just setting a timer and telling yourself you are going to stick with it. I haven't been doing a good job recently, but I've tried doing a 20 minute block of work with a 5 minute break, and then repeating. When you're with your family you probably could set a longer timer (I'm not sure every 20 minutes is a realistic need to check the internet anyway). I find the structure helps, though, and knowing that I have a "break" coming up helps me feel like it's ok to wait for the break vs having to avoid completely.
I have at times, removed social media from my phone before and I'm only able to access it on my ipad at night usually right before bed for me...that helps a lot!
Post by imojoebunny on Feb 24, 2020 10:44:28 GMT -5
The thing that helps me the most is having a tangible list of other things I want to do. It is kind of easy to forget things you would rather be doing, when the phone is so easy to pick up and amuse yourself with. I just keep a sort of on-going list, with some chores that always need doing, like Pay bills, fold laundry... and some fun things, I just want to do, like read a magazine (keep a stack of them that I want to look at), try a new recipe, play a game with my son...
I just had to delete tik Tok because I was spending so much time on it that I'm embarrassed, especially because it was all college kids doing dumb dances.
Post by puppylove64 on Feb 24, 2020 11:10:16 GMT -5
I had to delete games to stay off of them. I also try to leave it in my bedroom when I’m home. I’d rather watch tv as a family than all be on different devices in the house. I also try harder to exercise. I feel like it is a good excuse to not be on my phone. I find myself mindlessly scrolling Facebook and remind myself I don’t even care about what I’m looking at and try to stay off
I’m terrible at this too, but I’ve found that for it to stick, I need to replace phone time with something else. So I carry around a book instead of my phone (yes, even inside my house ... bonus: I read a lot more!) I also set rules for myself: no phones in restaurants, no phones at the dinner table, no phones an hour before bed, etc. Small, measurable goals.
I do something similar to this.
@@ I put my phone away, upstairs when my kids get home from school. I use the time instead to knit, read, tidy up, play a game with my kids, etc.
I use an app called Rescue Time, and paid a one-time fee for the premium access. It let's you set up a list of blocked apps, and when you want them blocked. I currently have mine set up to block apps between 30min after my alarm goes off to 9am. Everything is then "available" for about 20min which is when I take a coffee break at work. I repeat the blocking for every hour/hour and a half with short breaks built in (15 - 30min). It's unblocked for my lunch hour. This allows me to feel like I need to "catch up" with the internet world but not intrude into my work/life. You can link it to your work/home PC to block certain websites if you need to. (My work PC has us set up as admins on our own PC, and doesn't limit downloading unless you get too many viruses).
In the evenings I have access for longer periods of time, but have it shut off around 10pm when I want to go to bed. That way I don't stay up too late playing on my phone.
You CAN turn off the restriction, but you have to click through to 3 different screens, and then wait 20-30sec to de-activate. It's long enough for me that if I feel the urge and start the de-activate process, I end up just putting my phone down instead. You can set up unlimited time blocks and base them on the day of the week (I'm more lax on weekends).
I'm wrestling with this, too. I try to always have a book to read and I've started keeping a list of little tasks I can do when I have downtime instead of being on the phone (unload the dishwasher, tidy the pantry, file my nails, etc.)
I used to be on my phone constantly while watching tv/hanging out with H in the evenings, and I figured it was just that I needed something else to do with my hands. I really like brush calligraphy (super relaxing and requires a minimal initial investment) or I'll fold laundry or brush our dogs.
I have tried deleting the apps but to be totally honest I then just look at them through safari.
I just downloaded the rescue time app mentioned and will look into a smart-watch. The $50 one sounds definitely doable!!
I feel like the real issue is that I don’t want to do other things 😳. Like sure I have a million things on my to do list (laundry, dishes, prepping food, cleaning the house, etc) but all of them suck so the phone is way more appealing. And I seem to lack the willpower to stop myself 🤷🏼♀️
I did move my time-suck apps to the back page of my phone so it means I have to swipe through three other pages to get there. It does make me pause and sort of stop myself.
I delete apps for a few weeks if I feel I’m using it too much. Also when all my kids are with me (so don’t need to be reached incase of emergency) I put my phone on airplane mode and leave it to charge in my bedroom which is away from the areas of the house we are most in.
Turn off notifications/push for email and social media apps. Are they really urgent? Usually not. If I don’t physically have it on me, I won’t be as likely to pick it up to scroll. Leave it in your purse with the volume on, you’ll likely here texts come thru, it that is important. I’ve also set some screen time limits for myself, including at work and during typical “family time” at home. It will tell me the time is limited on all of my social media apps and grey them back, and you have to then click on ignore limits or 15 more minutes. Text still comes thru and I can also listen to music.
I’ve also eliminated screen time in the bedroom. I still use it for an alarm, but don’t allow myself to mindlessly scroll before bed. I’m getting more reading in this way.
I have tried deleting the apps but to be totally honest I then just look at them through safari.
I just downloaded the rescue time app mentioned and will look into a smart-watch. The $50 one sounds definitely doable!!
I feel like the real issue is that I don’t want to do other things 😳. Like sure I have a million things on my to do list (laundry, dishes, prepping food, cleaning the house, etc) but all of them suck so the phone is way more appealing. And I seem to lack the willpower to stop myself 🤷🏼♀️
Do you listen to podcasts at all? They help my productivity so much when it comes to mundane household tasks. I use wireless headphones to listen and set my phone down in a central location in the house. I can still hear call and text notifications through the headphones so I know if I need to go check my phone, but it is sooo much easier for me to power through chores when I’m listening to something interesting.
I have tried deleting the apps but to be totally honest I then just look at them through safari.
I just downloaded the rescue time app mentioned and will look into a smart-watch. The $50 one sounds definitely doable!!
I feel like the real issue is that I don’t want to do other things 😳. Like sure I have a million things on my to do list (laundry, dishes, prepping food, cleaning the house, etc) but all of them suck so the phone is way more appealing. And I seem to lack the willpower to stop myself 🤷🏼♀️
Do you listen to podcasts at all? They help my productivity so much when it comes to mundane household tasks. I use wireless headphones to listen and set my phone down in a central location in the house. I can still hear call and text notifications through the headphones so I know if I need to go check my phone, but it is sooo much easier for me to power through chores when I’m listening to something interesting.
No I would love to but my kids are always wandering around and chatting with me so feels like it would be hard to keep up?
I agree that being able to see notifications without having the phone nearby really limits the impulse to look at it while not feeling like you're going to miss something actually important. Doesn't have to be an Apple watch- there are other less expensive smartwatches out there. I have an Android phone, and a Garmin smartwatch that shows me notifications from my phone. My particular watch is in the $150-200 range, but DH has a different Garmin one that's <$100, or ~$50 if you get the previous year's model.
What is that model? I’ve been searching but can only find things $160 and above.
I have tried deleting the apps but to be totally honest I then just look at them through safari.
I just downloaded the rescue time app mentioned and will look into a smart-watch. The $50 one sounds definitely doable!!
I feel like the real issue is that I don’t want to do other things 😳. Like sure I have a million things on my to do list (laundry, dishes, prepping food, cleaning the house, etc) but all of them suck so the phone is way more appealing. And I seem to lack the willpower to stop myself 🤷🏼♀️
I set concrete rules
1. No phone 1 hour before bed and 1 hour after I wake up in the morning. 2. No phone in bed. 3. No phone when out socially, except of course looking up something specific like an address to where we're going next
Other things I've done - I don't have facebook anymore. Don't take my phone everywhere. If I'm just walking a few blocks for a short errand I leave my phone at home. Leave my phone in another part of the house. Sitting there doing nothing is ok. No I didn't replace the time I used to spend on facebook deep cleaning my house now lol. I do have hobbies I like to do that don't require a screen/phone that I'll do when I'm up for it - drawing (I took a drawing class), ukulele playing, reading book, stretching/yoga/meditation.
I agree that being able to see notifications without having the phone nearby really limits the impulse to look at it while not feeling like you're going to miss something actually important. Doesn't have to be an Apple watch- there are other less expensive smartwatches out there. I have an Android phone, and a Garmin smartwatch that shows me notifications from my phone. My particular watch is in the $150-200 range, but DH has a different Garmin one that's <$100, or ~$50 if you get the previous year's model.
What is that model? I’ve been searching but can only find things $160 and above.
Vivosmart 3 is the one you can get for ~$50, the 4 is ~$100. It's definitely more fitness tracker-style than watch style, but pretty narrow, not clunky at all.
What is that model? I’ve been searching but can only find things $160 and above.
Vivosmart 3 is the one you can get for ~$50, the 4 is ~$100. It's definitely more fitness tracker-style than watch style, but pretty narrow, not clunky at all.
Awesome thanks I found it.
So dumb question - you can’t answer the text or call on the watch right?