toddler obsessed with dog

[larzhope]

we have a small labradoodle who is a bit ornery.  My toddler is obsessed with him. she is 22 months and pushes him, grabs him, and overall terrorizes him. he hates it. He's growled at her a few times but it is now taking constant supervision between them. other than just making sure they are separated (which results in the dog crying constantly) does anyone have any tips? I don't want the toddler to hurt him, and I'm also starting to get concerned that he may get fed up and bite her.

I'm sure this situation is exacerbated since we are all home 24/7 now.

[macmars45]

My DS had this issue with our cat. Eventually she had enough and swiped at him which resulted in a huge scratch next to his eye. The only thing that truly helped was time. It got better when he was 2/2.5 years old. FWIW, I SAH with my DS so we were home quite a bit. Not as much as quarantine times of course but more than if he'd have been in childcare while I worked FT.

[sapphireblue]

I have a lab mix dog.

He is very very attached to me so like with you keeping him separate from me when I was with the kids wasn't really workable because he would have barked constantly.

90% of the time he is very tolerant of the kids and wags his tail around them and lets them put hats on his head or "walk" him around the yard, etc.

There were a couple of incidents early on, when my son was probably right around 20ish months like your DD. Tooth grazes a couple of times when my son was picking up Cheerios off the floor and my dog was eating them. Then there was an incident where my dog was sleeping and my son tripped and fell on his back end and he whipped around and bit him. It wasn't a full on bite but it was more than a corrective nip. It was super scary and basically since then my dog wears a basket muzzle at all times with my children.

A few months ago a very similar incident happened with my daughter--my dog was sound asleep in the middle of the room and she was running through and tripped and fell on his back end and he whipped his head around but nothing happened because of his muzzle. But it looked to me like she might have been bitten in the face without it.

He will never be around my kids without the muzzle. But almost all of the time he is gentle and he loves them and they love him and they play together. But he is a dog!

And I just want to say--I don't blame my dog or think he is terribly aggressive or anything like that. I don't even think he is bad with kids! In both cases he was asleep and I really believe it was his natural protective instincts. But still, I need to protect my children.

[lemoncupcake]

It’s the age - by closer to 2.5 our kids were much better. For now keeping them separated is kindest for everybody. Do you have a room you can gate off for the kid?

[larzhope]

Apr 1, 2020 20:05:46 GMT -5 lemoncupcake said:

It’s the age - by closer to 2.5 our kids were much better. For now keeping them separated is kindest for everybody. Do you have a room you can gate off for the kid?

definitely. Unfortunately if the dog is out of his crate and not near us (and we're obviously near her) he is pretty upset. I think the solution here is to crate him when we can't supervise or separate them. My husband and I have been switching off conference calls so we can always bring him into the room with us while the other parent is out with DD. Hopefully she grows out of it soon. oddly she doesn't behave this way with our lab (in my profile pic), and when she does get wound up, our lab just takes it.

[nellgirl]

Firstly, thank you for being vigilant, making sure that your pup isn’t just expected to put up with things, and taking his/her warning signs seriously. So many people don’t and it isn’t fair to the animals and isn’t safe for the kids.
As for your question, I know it’s stressful, but I think you keep on doing what you’re doing, but separating the pup and the kid if you can’t directly supervise.
We have a 10-year-old standard poodle and a 4-year-old child. Our pup is really patient with people generally, but I definitely have worked with my daughter so she understands the pup’s boundaries. She knows now that she can’t touch his feet, his toys, his bed, or his food, and she isn’t allowed to pet him if we aren’t there.
This is really hard with a toddler, but remember that in like 6 months, your kid will be so different that what is or isn’t working now may well then.

[al dente]

My baby is 24 mo and has gone through stages of being too rough with the dog. I usually put her in time out/separate them, and then immediately give the dog lots of attention. We also practiced gentle petting and the areas she can touch vs can’t allllll the time for awhile. Lots and lots of praise when I see her being nice/petting the dog appropriately.

I will also say we put the dog on Prozac shortly after the baby was born. When she was still a newborn the dog would grumble when I was trying to introduce them and it made me really nervous, and the vet suggested that. I think that also helps in the moments that she is too rough.

I feel you though it was really bad from like 18mo to close to now. And the two of them would drive me crazy because the dog would constantly jump the fence to be in the same area as the baby, but then would grumble if the baby got near him and she was super fast and obsessed with pulling his ears. I was constantly on my toes keeping them separated.