As I posted before the babysitter is struggling. We didn't want a ton of screen time, and she is getting paid $16 an hour. She is letting the kids watch about an hour a day. And it was her first day, she had issues with her commute, probably waking up, the kids were not listening well and fighting which is sort of normal, but I did talk to the kids. Any way to make this easier on her. I don't want her to leave because there is basically no childcare. It's hard because DH is on phone calls all day, so she is trying to get them outside and keep them quiet. I think it might be easier if no one was home.
I get home around 2, and it's awkward being there. I mostly ate lunch then headed up stairs to work. Then I came down and took DD to dance. I don't know it's just we are all there. So any suggestions would be good.
Also, I will have the kids myself on Fridays. What should I do with them? Not much is open, but I suppose I could try to make it a field trip day. I heard our arboretum opened which is $$$, but whatever it's not like we are going anywhere else. I suppose we could walk down and get ice cream.
They only thing we have done for 3 months is walks, and drives basically. Pools and playgrounds are not open, and I don't have the room for a pool in my backyard plus we don't want to kill our grass. We did buy a slip n slide. But I just would like a little structure to my week, I guess.
I've been talking a lot with my kids about making a "summer schedule" so that we have good expectations for what to do all day.
So far, it's got things like: - Eat breakfast - Indoor morning play (and then the kids came up with a list of stuff like legos, art project, etc... Basically, go in the playroom and occupy yourselves) - Morning snack - Morning reading time - Lunch time - Screen time - Outside play - Indoor afternoon play
It's not really "done" yet, but I figure if I put something like that on the fridge, it'll help give a little structure to the day and they won't be bugging me and aimlessly wandering so much.
I would set up a schedule with some times on it that work good with your weather before 9am: get up, eat breakfast, get dressed, brush teeth, make your bed 9-11 outside play with list of ideas (walk, scavenger hunt, soccer, chalk, bike rides, etc.) 11-1 inside quiet time with lunch kids can read/summer workbooks why she makes lunch and then watch TV after lunch for X minutes or 1 show 1-3 games, Legos, crafts
For me I always scheduled inside stuff after lunch because that is when it would get warm outside or the sun would finally come out here and I didn't want my babysitter having to deal with sunscreen. DD was 6 at the time and my babysitters were 14-16 so I didn't trust the application part very much. I also suggest having your kids make an inside bored jar and an outside board jar so when they don't know what to do they can pull something out of the jar. DD's jar has everything from skip counting to 100 by ?, swinging, unloading the dishwasher, reading, k'nex, coloring, vacuuming, brushing the dog, etc.
Post by traveltheworld on Jun 2, 2020 12:17:26 GMT -5
I'm super Type A, so I have an Excel scheudle that's posted on the fridge every week. But generally, it looks like this:
9:00 - 10:30 - Academic time, DS does his school work / math; DD does some preschool worksheets, or an arts/craft project 10:30 - 11:00 - "Recess" - the kids go outsdie and jump on the trampoline or just generally run around in the yard 11:00 - 11:30 - Science time - our nanny does a science lesson with them; usually just a simple science experiment 11:30 - 1:00 - the kids help make lunch, eat lunch and do chores; I really utilize our nanny to supervise the kids in doing chores - they do all laundry, dusting, wiping of surfaces, vacumm (we have a central vacumn that DS can move by himself), change their bedding, etc. 1:00 - 2:00 - quite reading / Outschool class - DS reads by himself, and our nanny either reads to DD or they listen to an audio book together 2:00 - 4:00 - outdoor time - they go outside rain or shine, if the weather is really miserable, they can stay in, but it has to be really miserable 4:00 - 5:00 - come home and just lounge around; DS showers and reads and DD and our nanny play a quiet game together
I find that I have to have a schedule so that I know when the kids are doing what. I have a long list of arts & crafts / science projects (with links) that our nanny can choose to do with the kids. In terms of outdoor time, they bike, take walks, paint rocks to put in nearby trails, go watch the ducks at the pond, play street hockey, play soccer/badminton at nearby field, etc.
waverly, I can't remember - are your kids are on summer break now?
If so, I probably would just set out general expectations (ie limiting screen time, desire for outside play, things that are desired, anything that's off limits, etc) and give her some time to find her groove. The way I see it, if I'm paying for someone to entertain my kids so that I can get work done, I'd rather give them the chance to see how they're able to do it vs. setting myself up for a summer of managing the process. And if that doesn't work, after a week or so, adjust and go from there.
She is getting used to your family and routine just as much as you're getting used to her.
We just hired a summer nanny who will start Monday (I am so very excited to be able to work and not have to watch children at the same time). Our plan (no idea how well it will work), is to give some general ideas, like they need outside time everyday, and here are some lunches they might like. And let her find her groove from there. I agree with k3am, I'm tired of planning and don't have time nor desire to come up with what they should do.
I agree with k3am. I work with a woman who has 4 kids all really close in age. Before she had the 4th, she had 3 who were not yet school aged, and she had this RIDICULOUS schedule for her nanny. It was incredibly detailed and gave like 4 activities for each of 2 activity times with the note that if you did an activity in the morning, you could NOT repeat it in the afternoon. She ended up quitting when she had #4 in part because she couldn’t keep a nanny. She eventually came back when the older 3 started school. No idea if she’s still the Nanny Nightmare. And I bet she didn’t follow her own crazy schedule when she stayed at home.
Instead I would give a list of things the kids enjoy, or ask her to brainstorm a list with the kids so you can order supplies. When we had a summer nanny, she did this, and we ended up with things like “cake mix cookies” and “learn new dances”. She also requested certain art supplies for different crafts.
And your H needs to get a pair of noise cancelling headphones with a microphone that’s close to his mouth for conference calls. Because it’s not feasible for kids to not make noise. It’s just not. And it’s not fair to ask a nanny to make them be silent.
I agree with the later posts. I wasn't really planning on giving her a whole schedule because she is older and has been a nanny previously. I was planning on letting her figure it out. I had a talk with DH about him being "too much". I was gone, so I don't think I was the problem. Also, DS was acting up.
DH doesn't expect the kids to be completely quiet. He has noise cancelling headphones and a mike. His office is all the way in our finished attic, so the kids are 2-3 floors below (living room and basement playroom). However, if they are loud he needs to just deal with it and not say anything, and by them being loud I mean screaming not talking. He needs to give the nanny time to address screaming.
waverly, DH spends 90% of his workday on calls and video meetings it seems like. He's set up in our dining room. The only kid related "noise" rule we had was no playing video games in the living room (attached to the dining room) while he's on a call.
Everyone is fully aware that people are working home, and that random noises from kids, pets, spouses, etc, are going to happen. And if he's got an extra few floors between him and the noise? That's kind of heaven. Now if it's a screaming yelling long-time tantrum, that's one thing, but occasional shouts or screams (we had a lot from DD), I wouldn't even bother trying to reign in.
I think they fall in the middle. It’s not a one off but not a long tantrum. Maybe 5 yells at her brother type thing. I’ll remind DH how lucky he is. Most people are in their dining rooms. He just happened to luck out that his office is in the attic.
I think they fall in the middle. It’s not a one off but not a long tantrum. Maybe 5 yells at her brother type thing. I’ll remind DH how lucky he is. Most people are in their dining rooms. He just happened to luck out that his office is in the attic.
The thing to remember with this too- SO MANY PEOPLE are in the same boat right now. Hearing some occasional background noise- kids, pets, what have you - is going to happen. No one is going to judge your DH for the occasional sound of a kid off in the distance making noise. There are definitely things you can do to help mitigate that - I agree with getting a headset if he doesn't have one. But at the same time, he's FAR from alone on this front.
I think they fall in the middle. It’s not a one off but not a long tantrum. Maybe 5 yells at her brother type thing. I’ll remind DH how lucky he is. Most people are in their dining rooms. He just happened to luck out that his office is in the attic.
The thing to remember with this too- SO MANY PEOPLE are in the same boat right now. Hearing some occasional background noise- kids, pets, what have you - is going to happen. No one is going to judge your DH for the occasional sound of a kid off in the distance making noise. There are definitely things you can do to help mitigate that - I agree with getting a headset if he doesn't have one. But at the same time, he's FAR from alone on this front.
Yes, exactly. We've all but given up in my office and assume a kid will actually make an appearance at some point in a lot of our meetings. Granted, they're all internal, but I can't imagine anyone getting upset by some background noise. My normal open office floor plan with loud music and sales people wandering around on headsets is probably louder on a call than a couple of kids yelling a few floors away.
I agree with k3am . I work with a woman who has 4 kids all really close in age. Before she had the 4th, she had 3 who were not yet school aged, and she had this RIDICULOUS schedule for her nanny. It was incredibly detailed and gave like 4 activities for each of 2 activity times with the note that if you did an activity in the morning, you could NOT repeat it in the afternoon. She ended up quitting when she had #4 in part because she couldn’t keep a nanny. She eventually came back when the older 3 started school. No idea if she’s still the Nanny Nightmare. And I bet she didn’t follow her own crazy schedule when she stayed at home.
Instead I would give a list of things the kids enjoy, or ask her to brainstorm a list with the kids so you can order supplies. When we had a summer nanny, she did this, and we ended up with things like “cake mix cookies” and “learn new dances”. She also requested certain art supplies for different crafts.
And your H needs to get a pair of noise cancelling headphones with a microphone that’s close to his mouth for conference calls. Because it’s not feasible for kids to not make noise. It’s just not. And it’s not fair to ask a nanny to make them be silent.
Not to sound like a total idiot but noise canceling headphones with a microphone -- that means people can't hear your background noise as much?
I have had that problem. People seem to be able to hear the background in my house MORE when I have my headphones on. I know its not going to be perfect but I'd like it to not be totally distracting. TBH the biggest problem for me is not kids yelling, but if people hear DH yelling at the kids, which has happened. Now that we have a sitter, I'm not so worried anymore, but a kind of ugly incident made me look for one with more urgency.
mustardseed2007- my headphones, if the mic is closer to my face, it only picks up my voice, not all the outside noise. It seems like noise cancelling headphones with a mic are better about this than less expensive headphones. I used to have them because of the number of calls I had to take in airports. And yeah, the booming “Flight 1641 to Phoenix is now boarding Group 2, Group 2 for Flight 1641 to Phoenix” was so much worse/more intrusive than “Please open my fruit snacks and put my sister in timeout because she won’t let me win at checkers.”
Yes / a good microphone can make all the difference. I was in a meeting today where my one employees laptop mic picks up EVERY THING. I had to mute her so that i could hear others talk.
I also sometimes make recordings for training videos. I have a specific microphone that i use. It doesn’t pick up ambient noise.
Speaking of background noise - maybe you all already know this, but when I’m on zoom, if I go up to the top of the screen I can change my laptop from picking up surround sound to just picking up the person speaking right in front of it. I had no idea till I was doing a social zoom and my friend explained it.
Speaking of background noise - maybe you all already know this, but when I’m on zoom, if I go up to the top of the screen I can change my laptop from picking up surround sound to just picking up the person speaking right in front of it. I had no idea till I was doing a social zoom and my friend explained it.
That's a cool tip, is it in settings?
For me, when I have zoom in full screen mode, if I go to the top of the screen and click, a box pops up that allows me to select.
If the nanny wants to take the kids to her mom’s house because they have a pool would you find that strange? I don’t, but DH does.
Her mom is a NICU nurse and is very careful. Divorced and 1 sister lives there. They went today and fed the kids pizza. I asked a million questions, and it seems fine but I’ve not met the mom. The nanny is a pretty responsible 26 year old. Not a teenager. (She told the kids she prefers to be called nanny not babysitter).