Do you text with your children in school?

[eddy]

He is allowed to have his phone with him, but I try to be very judicious about texting him. It is important that he learn to be independent and not depend on me remining him stuff or distracting him.

Sometimes he will text us at lunch with like current events stuff. I think that is cute lol.

[outnumbered]

No texting during school hours.

My oldest are a freshman and sophomore.  I do not text them until dismissal.  They do not need any more reason to be distracted by their phones.

When they were in middle school they did not have phones until eighth grade.  If I needed to leave a message I called the school office and a message was relayed to them (just like when I was in school).  If they needed to call me they had to go the office and ask to use the phone, we were told at the beginning of the year students were welcome to do this. 

My fifth grader has no phone so no texting him during the day.  He bikes to and from school and all over the neighborhood.  I am glad he is learning to navigate without a phone.

[minniemouse]

I have a 6th grader. I respond if she texts me, but I don’t initiate texts to her during school hours.

[savan]

No way. He's supposed to have his phone off while at school. There is nothing for me to say to him that can not wait until he's home. In the event of an emergency, I'd call the office.

One of the bonuses of having my kids at school is that I do not have to interact with them. Heh.

[tamarindy]

I teach middle school and parents text incessantly. Many times I am helping a student directly and the texts pop up on their laptop. Sometimes it happens during quizzes. Sometimes I redirect them from texting and they immediately tell me, “but it’s my mom!”

It’s so, so great.

[eddy]

Also I am resisting the urge to text DS right now as I see his track practice is cancelled. I know he knows this. I know he knows to just walk home.

But thanks to this thread, I didn't send the text. :-)

[meganew]

Apr 19, 2021 12:24:10 GMT -5 redheadk said:

I have no input on middle school but I was talking to another teacher today about kids and cell phones in our district. I was always shocked at the number of calls my kids (elementary school!) would get during the school day and it was almost always grandma. Where in the world does Grandma think her 6-10 year old grandchild is at 9:30am on a Tuesday in October?

Lol, yes the amount of backpacks ringing mid day in our k-3 hallway is insane! Who is calling you???

[spindle92]

So when your children get their first job, will you be texting them during there work hours too?

I deal with some first job youths and let me tell you, if they were texting with mom or dad outside their break, they would be written up.

[Alps79]

Sorry to say, but I am very against this.
I’m also very thankful that phones are absolutely not allowed at my kids’ school.

[sugarbear]

So during COVID, our MS students have phones on them all day because we aren't allowing them to use their lockers. For texting, it's a moot point because again, they can also use messaging on their lap tops.

But the other day I was leading a discussion and a phone rang in class. The student looked at her phone and turned it off-- as she should! But it was a Friday and we were mostly done with the discussion and I hadn't assigned any homework, so I said, "who was it?" And she said, "my grandmother."

I said geez! No one should hang up on their grandmother, ever! Why is she calling you in the middle of the day, and doesn't that probably mean there is some sort of emergency? Call her back!

So the kid called grandma in the middle of class. Put her on speaker for reasons that I do not entirely understand.

She said, "Hi grandma. My teacher was worried about why you were calling and told me to call you back."

Grandma laughs and says, "oh honey, it was just an ASS dial."

I love that Grandma.

And yes, please stop texting your kids.

[gummybear]

Never.
She isn’t allowed to bring her phone to school (our rules not the school’s) bc she made a tic toc in the bathroom there.

When she did have her phone I would only text her when I knew she was on the bus.

[InBetweenDays]

Our middle school doesn't allow phones out at all during the day. I'm not sure about high school - DD is in 9th grade and just went back for the first time today (2 afternoons per week) so we'll see.

I don't expect (or want) either kid to check their phone until the end of the day. So the only reason I text during the day is if there is something they need to know right as school ends - someone else is picking them up, sports practice has changed, etc.

[InBetweenDays]

Apr 19, 2021 12:24:10 GMT -5 redheadk said:

I have no input on middle school but I was talking to another teacher today about kids and cell phones in our district. I was always shocked at the number of calls my kids (elementary school!) would get during the school day and it was almost always grandma. Where in the world does Grandma think her 6-10 year old grandchild is at 9:30am on a Tuesday in October?

I'm actually really surprised my parents haven't done this yet. They always seem so surprised when I say we can't do XYZ at 11:30am on a Thursday. Given both H and I have very flexible jobs (well, until today - H just started a new less flexible job) but we still have work commitments! 

[oliviapope]

I don't, but he's 9. I can't see a reason why I'd need to. But as he gets to high school I can absolutely see needing to reach him during the hours of 8-3.

And to the point that teenagers shouldn't text outside their break, kids at school don't typically get breaks. I certainly didn't, even during lunch our phones couldn't be out. I alway thought was extremely silly.

[lynn07]

The 11yo takes a phone to school, but it is silenced and he only uses it for emergencies (which, thankfully he has never had one) and to call us when school is out so we can tell him where we are parked (our school parking lot is the WORST). The 10yo does not have one, so they meet at the front of the school and then both walk to the car together. It has never occurred to me to text him, and he would get in trouble (from both us and the school) if he used it during school hours.

[mcppalmbeach]

Apr 19, 2021 13:50:23 GMT -5 sugarbear said:

So during COVID, our MS students have phones on them all day because we aren't allowing them to use their lockers. For texting, it's a moot point because again, they can also use messaging on their lap tops.

But the other day I was leading a discussion and a phone rang in class. The student looked at her phone and turned it off-- as she should! But it was a Friday and we were mostly done with the discussion and I hadn't assigned any homework, so I said, "who was it?" And she said, "my grandmother."

I said geez! No one should hang up on their grandmother, ever! Why is she calling you in the middle of the day, and doesn't that probably mean there is some sort of emergency? Call her back!

So the kid called grandma in the middle of class. Put her on speaker for reasons that I do not entirely understand.

She said, "Hi grandma. My teacher was worried about why you were calling and told me to call you back."

Grandma laughs and says, "oh honey, it was just an ASS dial."

I love that Grandma.

And yes, please stop texting your kids.

This is a great story lol.

[mcppalmbeach]

I don’t want to encourage him to be on his phone during school so I won’t. Right now he is virtual so I do text him (In his room) like FYI I’m leaving to pick up your brother.

[game blouses]

Occasional updates about logistics are fine IMO (not during class hours), but I’d avoid constant communication.

One of my most infuriating moments as a teacher was when a freshman informed me he wouldn’t take a test. I told him he most certainly would be. Five seconds later the office called and said he needed to go home. Turns out that he’d texted his mom that he was sick (he was not) and she’d called the school. The smug look on his face as he walked out of my classroom...

[erbear]

You should stop. It’s a bad habit and I get very annoyed with parents who text their kids during school. You know where they are. You don’t need to be in touch with them every second of the day (I teach middle school and it’s a constant problem for me)

[akayf]

My 7th grader keeps his phone in his backpack with the ringer off. No lockers right now but back when he did have a locker, he kept it in his pencil case once again with the ringer turned off. I think I have texted 2x all school year about pickup changes and he never responded until after school. He checks his phone as soon as school is over.

ETA-he corrected me. He turns it off completely. Lol. He’s terrified to that he might have not turned the ringer off so it’s easier to just turn the phone off completely.

[Patsy Baloney]

🤷🏻‍♀️ A picture of a dog equates to putting a note in a kid’s lunch to me.

Do I think you need to have a full-on text convo with a kid? Nah. But lord, everything fucking sucks right now. Sounds like a lot of people could use a pic of a dog texted fo them.

[penguingrrl]

Absolutely not. When they’re at school I great it as no different than when I was at school. If the child truly needs to hear from me I call the front office.

And the one time my kid tried to text me from school they got in a lot of trouble that evening when they got home.

They bring their phones with them in case either they go somewhere else right after school or a true emergency occurs. Otherwise I expect their phones to be off and away for the duration of the school day. And I’m not even sure what time lunch is to text during it.

[dontlook]

I would have responded with something supportive to that text since she sounded like she needed encouragement. Generally speaking, if my kid is texting general nonsense or non-emergency things during the day I would remind them to put the phone away at school.

[onetruething]

I'm a teacher and when my kids were younger and didn't have phones I swore I would never do this but now I do it all the time.

[rooster222]

I do. Dd (13) usually initiates it during her lunch so I'll reply. Occasionally I get a distress text about a bad grade or something forgotten and I send a reply. I wouldn't text long conversations or anything.

[stephm0188]

With? No, and he knows he’ll lose his phone if he’s using it during the school day. It’s supposed to stay in his locker. It was one of the ground rules we agreed on when he got it.

Because it’s supposed to stay in his locker, I’ve sent the occasional text about a transportation change. I don’t get a response til after school, so I assume he’s upholding his end of the deal.

[Jalapeñomel]

Apr 19, 2021 15:40:42 GMT -5 Patsy Baloney said:

🤷🏻‍♀️ A picture of a dog equates to putting a note in a kid’s lunch to me.

Do I think you need to have a full-on text convo with a kid? Nah. But lord, everything fucking sucks right now. Sounds like a lot of people could use a pic of a dog texted fo them.

So put a note in the lunch!

Seriously though, I don’t think parents really understand how challenging this is for teachers.

[imimahoney]

Apr 19, 2021 13:04:33 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

PLEASE STOP TEXTING STUDENTS DURING THE SCHOOL DAY.

This!

When kids say it's "their mom" I always tell them to say that your busy in class. Drives me bonkers.

[spindle92]

Apr 19, 2021 18:06:10 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Apr 19, 2021 15:40:42 GMT -5 Patsy Baloney said:

🤷🏻‍♀️ A picture of a dog equates to putting a note in a kid’s lunch to me.

Do I think you need to have a full-on text convo with a kid? Nah. But lord, everything fucking sucks right now. Sounds like a lot of people could use a pic of a dog texted fo them.

So put a note in the lunch!

Seriously though, I don’t think parents really understand how challenging this is for teachers.

And extremely disrespectful!

[Patsy Baloney]

Apr 19, 2021 18:06:10 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Apr 19, 2021 15:40:42 GMT -5 Patsy Baloney said:

🤷🏻‍♀️ A picture of a dog equates to putting a note in a kid’s lunch to me.

Do I think you need to have a full-on text convo with a kid? Nah. But lord, everything fucking sucks right now. Sounds like a lot of people could use a pic of a dog texted fo them.

So put a note in the lunch!

Seriously though, I don’t think parents really understand how challenging this is for teachers.

My kid’s school doesn’t have lunch right now.

I understand cell phones and people not respecting that school is school and cell phones break attention is extremely difficult for teachers. In the scenario described in the OP, it sounds like a kid reaching out for emotional support. I would have a really hard time ignoring that, and don’t know that there’s a point in doing so during a school year like this one.