Post by seeyalater52 on Aug 11, 2021 7:30:36 GMT -5
Nothing like being up for a promotion to bring out the pettiest and most random performance feedback that everyone has been saving up for 7 years (?!) without ever mentioning it. I really need a new job. I rage-typed a cover letter last night while bawling my face off but I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to actually do this.
Nothing like being up for a promotion to bring out the pettiest and most random performance feedback that everyone has been saving up for 7 years (?!) without ever mentioning it. I really need a new job. I rage-typed a cover letter last night while bawling my face off but I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to actually do this.
That's how I ended up leaving law firm practice. I didn't love the fact that sales was a huge part of my job, but put in the time and effort and doubled my book of business every year 3 years in a row. Then, the year I was being put forward for partner, someone I worked for dinged me in a review for having "only" $x for a book at my level and IT WAS WRONG. She was using 4 year old numbers. I realized that this person who I'd thought had my back was actively working against me all along.
I was like the fuck this fuck that fuck this too cat gif, cried my eyes out, made an excel spreadsheet of jobs, referral resources, and headhunters and worked an hour every day on contacts and applications until I found something new. I simultaneously worked like hell to be promoted because I was all about expanding options and was on the slate, too.
All that is to say, grief and anger can become assets in a job hunt. Or a promotion effort.
Once I left, I realized I'd been not happy for years, but sort of hiding it from myself because I didn't want to believe it. The first place I landed had great work, great clients, and...a sadistic boss, but I leveraged that experience into what I have now. Where I'm...satistified? Enjoy my work? So weird. Ha. Now when opportunities come along I can pursue them without feeling like wolves are nipping at my heels. You'll land on your feet too. I know it.
Nothing like being up for a promotion to bring out the pettiest and most random performance feedback that everyone has been saving up for 7 years (?!) without ever mentioning it. I really need a new job. I rage-typed a cover letter last night while bawling my face off but I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to actually do this.
That's how I ended up leaving law firm practice. I didn't love the fact that sales was a huge part of my job, but put in the time and effort and doubled my book of business every year 3 years in a row. Then, the year I was being put forward for partner, someone I worked for dinged me in a review for having "only" $x for a book at my level and IT WAS WRONG. She was using 4 year old numbers. I realized that this person who I'd thought had my back was actively working against me all along.
I was like the fuck this fuck that fuck this too cat gif, cried my eyes out, made an excel spreadsheet of jobs, referral resources, and headhunters and worked an hour every day on contacts and applications until I found something new. I simultaneously worked like hell to be promoted because I was all about expanding options and was on the slate, too.
All that is to say, grief and anger can become assets in a job hunt. Or a promotion effort.
Once I left, I realized I'd been not happy for years, but sort of hiding it from myself because I didn't want to believe it. The first place I landed had great work, great clients, and...a sadistic boss, but I leveraged that experience into what I have now. Where I'm...satistified? Enjoy my work? So weird. Ha. Now when opportunities come along I can pursue them without feeling like wolves are nipping at my heels. You'll land on your feet too. I know it.
Somehow it makes me feel immensely better to know that someone as clearly badass and accomplished as you are has faced this same bullshit. This morning my boss tried to backtrack the whole thing but I am still really angry at her and at everyone else for putting me in this stupid position just because they were in it when they had to fight tooth and nail for their own promotions. I am not here for sexist hazing.
Multiple family members and close friends have independently pointed out that my workplace is incredibly toxic and has been for a long time which is not the typical language I'd use to describe it (historically I have loved my job and bosses and tolerated my organization) but.... I'm starting to see where they might get that impression from.
Nothing like being up for a promotion to bring out the pettiest and most random performance feedback that everyone has been saving up for 7 years (?!) without ever mentioning it. I really need a new job. I rage-typed a cover letter last night while bawling my face off but I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to actually do this.
That's how I ended up leaving law firm practice. I didn't love the fact that sales was a huge part of my job, but put in the time and effort and doubled my book of business every year 3 years in a row. Then, the year I was being put forward for partner, someone I worked for dinged me in a review for having "only" $x for a book at my level and IT WAS WRONG. She was using 4 year old numbers. I realized that this person who I'd thought had my back was actively working against me all along.
I was like the fuck this fuck that fuck this too cat gif, cried my eyes out, made an excel spreadsheet of jobs, referral resources, and headhunters and worked an hour every day on contacts and applications until I found something new. I simultaneously worked like hell to be promoted because I was all about expanding options and was on the slate, too.
All that is to say, grief and anger can become assets in a job hunt. Or a promotion effort.
Once I left, I realized I'd been not happy for years, but sort of hiding it from myself because I didn't want to believe it. The first place I landed had great work, great clients, and...a sadistic boss, but I leveraged that experience into what I have now. Where I'm...satistified? Enjoy my work? So weird. Ha. Now when opportunities come along I can pursue them without feeling like wolves are nipping at my heels. You'll land on your feet too. I know it.
Anger and grief fueled something similar for me and my husband as well. Mine was a much more drawn out process than either his or yours, because it included a stop to get licensed in a new state and eventually a giant career shift. But yes - anger prompted nearly every step at the beginning.
It was so worth it to me. I'm in a much better company, with a better boss and amazing flexibility. I couldn't have imagined where I am now 3 years ago.
That's how I ended up leaving law firm practice. I didn't love the fact that sales was a huge part of my job, but put in the time and effort and doubled my book of business every year 3 years in a row. Then, the year I was being put forward for partner, someone I worked for dinged me in a review for having "only" $x for a book at my level and IT WAS WRONG. She was using 4 year old numbers. I realized that this person who I'd thought had my back was actively working against me all along.
I was like the fuck this fuck that fuck this too cat gif, cried my eyes out, made an excel spreadsheet of jobs, referral resources, and headhunters and worked an hour every day on contacts and applications until I found something new. I simultaneously worked like hell to be promoted because I was all about expanding options and was on the slate, too.
All that is to say, grief and anger can become assets in a job hunt. Or a promotion effort.
Once I left, I realized I'd been not happy for years, but sort of hiding it from myself because I didn't want to believe it. The first place I landed had great work, great clients, and...a sadistic boss, but I leveraged that experience into what I have now. Where I'm...satistified? Enjoy my work? So weird. Ha. Now when opportunities come along I can pursue them without feeling like wolves are nipping at my heels. You'll land on your feet too. I know it.
Somehow it makes me feel immensely better to know that someone as clearly badass and accomplished as you are has faced this same bullshit. This morning my boss tried to backtrack the whole thing but I am still really angry at her and at everyone else for putting me in this stupid position just because they were in it when they had to fight tooth and nail for their own promotions. I am not here for sexist hazing.
Multiple family members and close friends have independently pointed out that my workplace is incredibly toxic and has been for a long time which is not the typical language I'd use to describe it (historically I have loved my job and bosses and tolerated my organization) but.... I'm starting to see where they might get that impression from.
There were things I really liked about my firm and people who I was and am still friends with there. The work was interesting and challenging. The people were smart. I liked my clients. So I was very taken aback when a good friend of mine (also a lawyer) was like "you have to get out of there" about a year before I started looking. She could see more clearly than me that there were some fundamental things that weren't going to work for me long term there. She also could see that the snake was a snake and I was at that point blind to it.
Once I left, I learned the snake had snaked other people before me so this was a pattern. It wasn't about me, it was about how the snake saw herself professionally. And it does NOT have to be that way.
I'm currently neck deep in a really overly complicated friend drama situation and it's really goddamn frustrating because it involves two people's really personal shit so I can't even adequately explain the situation to ask for advice from the CEP braintrust because there's too many wrinkles that are not ok for me to share on the interwebs. And it involves two of the people I use as sounding boards IRL most of the time, and they've both asked that I not tell other people I'm closest to! So I REALLY have no idea what to do with it. Entirely too much of my brain is just SPINNING on this shit. haaaate this.
I don't know which is my most hated job - dealing with printer supplies, ordering business cards for people (who can and should order them themselves), or finding all the damn receipts and reconciling them.
I had no idea the pain of managing office supplies and supply budgets until I took my current role.
Yes I'm quoting myself to add to the list, property. We don't have a barcode system because we're in the stone age and now I'm being told that we have to go get a truck, load the truck, and then take it for unload for excess property.
I'm 100% not sure how this falls into an office job and why the office actually taking the excess property can't come pick it up.
I had no idea the pain of managing office supplies and supply budgets until I took my current role.
Yes I'm quoting myself to add to the list, property. We don't have a barcode system because we're in the stone age and now I'm being told that we have to go get a truck, load the truck, and then take it for unload for excess property.
I'm 100% not sure how this falls into an office job and why the office actually taking the excess property can't come pick it up.
The amount of stuff I track that isn't actually stuff that is my job is insane. Computers, computer replacement schedules, conference room tech, who has keys to the building, vehicle keys, furniture/office chairs (like wtf why is that stuff moving around?), etc.
We are enrolled in an energy saving program with our electric company, where they will raise the thermostat automatically during periods of high energy consumption.
Apparently at my house right now it is 80 degrees and 77% humidity. I texted my H and told him to feel free to manually override if he's uncomfortable... that seems really hot! I'm at work with a cardigan and a shawl on because the AC is freezing here.
I am hoping getting new windows will help prevent it from being so humid indoors...that can't be great for the house.
We are enrolled in an energy saving program with our electric company, where they will raise the thermostat automatically during periods of high energy consumption.
Apparently at my house right now it is 80 degrees and 77% humidity. I texted my H and told him to feel free to manually override if he's uncomfortable... that seems really hot! I'm at work with a cardigan and a shawl on because the AC is freezing here.
I am hoping getting new windows will help prevent it from being so humid indoors...that can't be great for the house.
I do not want to panic you, but as someone who recently dealt with an ENDLESS MOLD DRAMA that was the result of summer humidity in my home definitely consider getting a whole house dehumidifier if your new windows aren't able to bring that level down. The moisture is a real killer and mold is both difficult/expensive to get rid of, and nearly impossible to claim on homeowner's insurance.
We are enrolled in an energy saving program with our electric company, where they will raise the thermostat automatically during periods of high energy consumption.
Apparently at my house right now it is 80 degrees and 77% humidity. I texted my H and told him to feel free to manually override if he's uncomfortable... that seems really hot! I'm at work with a cardigan and a shawl on because the AC is freezing here.
I am hoping getting new windows will help prevent it from being so humid indoors...that can't be great for the house.
I do not want to panic you, but as someone who recently dealt with an ENDLESS MOLD DRAMA that was the result of summer humidity in my home definitely consider getting a whole house dehumidifier if your new windows aren't able to bring that level down. The moisture is a real killer and mold is both difficult/expensive to get rid of, and nearly impossible to claim on homeowner's insurance.
Yikes! Definitely something I will keep in mind. It is crazy how much our house swings - in the winter it was in the 25% range and we needed to run humidifiers! I am sorry you had to deal with that.
Post by eponinepontmercy on Aug 12, 2021 9:08:48 GMT -5
DH had some lab work done and his glucose was sky high. His doctor isn't calling him pre-diabetic yet, but put him on meds and wants him to lose a certain amount of weight by the end of the year. He had lost a lot a few years ago, but gained some back and has gone back to some bad habits. He's been in a rough place mentally for a while and that's not helping.
That rough place is the reason that we stopped house hunting, because he isn't sure he can make that commitment to me and our marriage at the moment. He started seeing his therapist again. I'm not even sure what else to say about it.
eponinepontmercy- Big, big hugs. I'm so sorry. Depression and anxiety are horrible and make people say things they don't actually believe. I know the words are coming out of his mouth but I wouldn't trust that they're his thoughts.
I'm really struggling mentally this week. So much so that I am upset to an outsized degree about Katie Compton's doping ban and forced early retirement. She's a legend and I was really, really looking forward to seeing her race at least once during the upcoming season. We're even going to the world championships next year, which was supposed to be her final race.
Post by eponinepontmercy on Aug 13, 2021 8:21:27 GMT -5
My parents were supposed to visit this weekend. They haven't been here since last August and I haven't seen them since May. Last night, my dad went to the hospital with chest pains and they admitted him because of his history of heart disease. He just said they still don't know what the problem is.
I need another vacation.
ETA: I just talked to my mom and they think it might have been a pulmonary embolism, but they don't know for sure yet.
I took today off and went to go see Suicide Squad. I didn't realize until I got there that the last movie I saw in the theater was Birds of Prey over 18 months ago. I guess I have a type!
I was hoping for a private screening since it was the middle of a weekday but no luck. There were only maybe seven other people in the whole theater though.