I need a gut check from parents who are like minded and maybe even more hard core than me at this point. Your child has very well controlled asthma. Doesn't even need to use an inhaler once a week. Sometimes gets winded after extreme exercise but not always. This child has not been in school in person since kindergarten went remote in 2020. Prior to that he stayed home with a caregiver, never did daycare or preschool or anything. So essentially, he has had no opportunity to develop social, emotional, normal childhood skills due to isolation. It is noticeable to outside parties that he does not have social skills. Academically, he's ok. But generally he hates school because it is boring, he has to follow their schedule, he cannot figure out how to deal with unstructured play time when it is there (like recess), and he has no friends whatsoever. Is his fully controlled asthma a high enough risk that you would ever consider keeping him remote for another full year? Masking is optional at school but he is fine masking all day. New England case numbers are no where near other states. I think at this point in his development the risks of staying home again far outweigh the covid risks for him. But I'm curious what others think or if you have any good articles on the benefits of in person learning.
What does your doctor recommend? Which NE state are you in, if you don't mind sharing? Do you think most kids are masking at school or would he be the only one?
I'm in MA and my DD1 just started 1st grade. Your post sounds like you want to send him to school but you are afraid to. I honestly can't imagine having DD1 do virtual school. She was in person last year as well and it was an amazing experience for her, even with all the social distancing, etc. I think the social and emotional learning is really important and I'd be worried about him falling behind in that aspect if he's already in 2nd grade. I would talk with your doctor and unless they strongly prefer virtual, I'd probably send him. I get really anxious watching the news, but I feel like case loads are very different in the rest of the country compared with highly vaccinated states like New England. The only other thing that would give me pause is that they aren't requiring masks. Our school is which is reassuring with Delta.
The people complaining about shutting down want us to just ignore covid all together. That is their complaint. Which BTW I can't WAIT to get to that place. We are not there though.
In the state of Iowa 0-17 is now the largest age category for positive tests. So we are really trying out this whole infecting our kids thing. Again I feel a bit of privileged because my community is very liberal and continues to take covid seriously. Our school numbers remain low. Most people are masking, we have high vaccination rates etc. It is really saving us at the moment. I am going to just stay in my bubble.
twinmomma , I am not as cautious as some are but I would sacrifice anything for in person school. Especially at the elementary level.
Same
I could write a book about how I saw such a positive turn around once my kids were back in school full time. It was (and hopefully continues to be) worth the risk.
twinmomma my DS2 has asthma, but it really is only an issue when he gets a cold. I sent him to K last year and it's the healthiest he's ever been. We are currently county mandated for masks, but even with it optional, I was still planning on sending him to 1st in person. Obviously talk to your dr, but I would do it.
Post by mysteriouswife on Sept 2, 2021 8:23:55 GMT -5
Next week our school system is closed to help combat Covid spread. Due to state laws they have to close without any learning. This can easily swap to hybrid or virtual if Lee would pull his head out of his ass.
I have cried nearly everyday since school started here. My kids have missed more school in the first three weeks than DD did all year in 6th grade (her last full year of in-person) they have caught every germ going around that isn’t Covid. Between Covid, my high stress job, and other life I feel defeated.
I really appreciate the insight! It's a messy situation - his dad and I both agree that in person school absolutely has to happen. His mom wants to go to war over it and keep him home indefinitely. The pediatrician was willing to say that the people around him should be masked, per CDC guidelines, which, obviously a doctor is going to say that. But the doctor has in no way indicated that he needs to be kept home.
I found out that school's definition of an exposure is "within 3 feet for 15+ minutes unmasked." But masks are required, ergo, there will by definition be no exposures this year and so no notifications. I'm WTF'ing this, esp. in elementary grades where kids aren't reliable narrators of who they've been around.
twinmomma, DD has virus induced asthma. She may have outgrown it, since the last time she needed her nebulizer was when she had influenza in December 2019.
She is attending in person school. I worry about her, but we had no spread in schools last year.
I would push the doctor for an answer, maybe in writing. Is child cleared for school or not. I think based on what you posted the doctor would say cleared for school.
In August 2020, I talked to 2 doctors about my children. General pediatrician said do not send them to school (I'm so glad I ignored his advice), but his reasoning was they brought it back home to the parents not that the kids get sick themselves. I also spoke to DS's cardiologist who said his risk factors were the same as all other children. He was not at increased risk.
I need a gut check from parents who are like minded and maybe even more hard core than me at this point. .
I would send him. I think in person school is invaluable, especially after two years of being home.
But I also realize that I am not as cautious as many on here.
I agree, and I am on the cautious side of cautious. Kids need school. Starting school in 2nd grade is not ideal. If he is a good masked and cases are low, I’d send him.
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”
twinmomma I would also want to send him, assuming teachers at a minimum are masked. I think I’m quite cautious but the benefits of in person learning are huge.
Can you schedule a telehealth visit with your pedi and ask all parents to participate to come up with a school plan and recommended precautions? It really should be the pedi’s job to help you weigh the benefits and risks to in person schooling given the child’s medical condition.
And can you look into alternative options for socialization and group activities while you work on getting mom onboard? We have done play dates throughout the pandemic with my now 3 y/o but as he’s gotten older I’ve found he’s benefited from more structure and goal oriented group activities, which teaches him important skills like waiting his turn and attending to an adult directed activity (versus 100% child led). We’ve started going to art classes and story time at our children’s garden and start a paid music class in the park next week. Everything is outdoors and we have him mask when distancing isn’t possible, so it’s about as low risk as it gets (his four month old brother is immunocompromised and obviously unvaccinated so we do have to be careful).
For older kids, I’m part of a covid cautious Facebook group and see parents organize outdoor only soccer leagues/tumbling/gymnastics, private small group swim lessons with vaccinated teachers, group field trips (apple picking, etc), fine art and music lessons etc. can you look for a similar group and see what might be available in your area? There should be options even the more cautious parents would be comfortable with, and perhaps that can also help ease the child’s mother on helping her child re-enter the world.
I am very covid cautious. Very. H is as well. My DS is an only child who has been home with me since he was born. We did play dates, Bible Study Fellowship, Sunday School & he was babysat by my BFF while I worked very PT up until very early March 2020. Nothing since then. I home schooled him for prek last year. He hasn't been without a trusted family member (mostly just H and me) since March 2020.
His whole school is masked, his teacher is vaxxed. There are risks but he needs social skills. His are absolutely noticeably lacking.
He started kinder in person today. We left him sobbing & screaming this morning if you're wondering how it started.
Post by 5kcandlesinthewind on Sept 2, 2021 14:31:08 GMT -5
One day. We made it one. fucking. day. before we got an email that someone in his class tested positive. The note says he wasn't a close contact, but it also listed the wrong fucking school name, so I'm not sure I can even trust it.
He also told us that some kid kicked him in the lunchline yesterday until he cried and a teacher stopped it, and then today, came home with a scratch under his eye because he got smacked in the face playing tag.
I am not going to make it this year, I swear to god.
I found out that school's definition of an exposure is "within 3 feet for 15+ minutes unmasked." But masks are required, ergo, there will by definition be no exposures this year and so no notifications. I'm WTF'ing this, esp. in elementary grades where kids aren't reliable narrators of who they've been around.
Yes, contact tracing is essentially a joke and just makes the numbers look better on paper. Essentially, it allows the schools to claim that the spread is happening outside of school. I’m clearly frustrated by having to talk between the lines when I talk with parents. My best advice is to ask your kids if anyone they sit next to or play with is gone from school.
share.memebox.com/x/uKhKaZmemebox referal code for 20% off! DD1 "J" born 3/2003 DD2 "G" born 4/2011 DS is here! "H" born 2/2014 m/c#3 1-13-13 @ 9 weeks m/c#2 11-11-12 @ 5w2d I am an extended breastfeeding, cloth diapering, baby wearing, pro marriage equality, birth control lovin', Catholic mama.
I am really distressed about a friend who has both parents in the hospital. Pretty sure they aren't vaccinated (I know she isn't) and they've been acting like everything is normal, in Texas. Her mom is medically frail and was sick most of last year. The fact that they aren't vaxxed or even masking around them just blows my mind, and now both are in the hospital and may not make it. This was so preventable and PREDICTABLE. I cannot imagine letting my kids go to school unmasked and then letting them hang out unmasked around their frail grandmother. But if she dies I'm sure it will just be a bunch of "she's in Heaven now, Jesus called her home" shit.
I really appreciate the insight! It's a messy situation - his dad and I both agree that in person school absolutely has to happen. His mom wants to go to war over it and keep him home indefinitely. The pediatrician was willing to say that the people around him should be masked, per CDC guidelines, which, obviously a doctor is going to say that. But the doctor has in no way indicated that he needs to be kept home.
It's time to find out of school places he can learn the social skills. Rather than going to war, start negotiations about common ground. Frankly, spring would have been a perfect time to plan a summer full of outdoor, masked activities with other kids. Camps, classes, sports, anything. Activities where he learns to interact with others, to follow rules, and be part of a group. As those activities go well, he will be more ready for a classroom environment and his mother might, too. That boat has sailed but at least you can fill his fall with all that.
Kids got homeschooled before the pandemic and had supplemental activities to fill those gaps. If this mom really wants to home school, then it's time to add in all those extras like she would in other times. I have a child that age. While homeschooling isn't the route I'd go, she has friends who were pulled. They are fine interacting with others and following schedules and rules. The families kept up school rhythms, safe interactions, etc. It isn't black or white.
This is the hill she wants to die on. It's up to you guys to decide if its also your "burn it down" issue. He's going to suffer if it is, no matter the outcome.
I found out that school's definition of an exposure is "within 3 feet for 15+ minutes unmasked." But masks are required, ergo, there will by definition be no exposures this year and so no notifications. I'm WTF'ing this, esp. in elementary grades where kids aren't reliable narrators of who they've been around.
Lunch? snack? and no notifications unless close contact exposure? Our school has been notifying entire classes of in class cases without close contact (ie. they don't sit close at lunch or whatever) and labeling them "second level." There is a middle ground.
sonrisa, We actually tried some camp options this summer for that exact reason. She refused to agree to sign him up. She also said that she wouldn't bring him on any of her days during the week if we did move forward with signing him up, so it became cost prohibitive for us to be registering for activities that he'd only be attending 50% of the time. She doesn't want to actually home school him, she wants remote school like last year where the school does all the work. She has no desire or intention of developing curriculum herself or anything. So, thankfully she's moved on from that as a hill to die on since the school isn't offering anything. She's just battling it out over every policy in place now. We're letting her dig herself into the hole of "crazy parent" while maintaining only positive interactions with school on our end.
I am really distressed about a friend who has both parents in the hospital. Pretty sure they aren't vaccinated (I know she isn't) and they've been acting like everything is normal, in Texas. Her mom is medically frail and was sick most of last year. The fact that they aren't vaxxed or even masking around them just blows my mind, and now both are in the hospital and may not make it. This was so preventable and PREDICTABLE. I cannot imagine letting my kids go to school unmasked and then letting them hang out unmasked around their frail grandmother. But if she dies I'm sure it will just be a bunch of "she's in Heaven now, Jesus called her home" shit.
why why why
Well, maybe it's her time and only g*d can decide. Just like all the people who flooded in basement apartments in the hurricane. Or people with the misfortune of living in Afghanistan. Nothing could have been done.
We are en route to my parents’ lake house six hours from home. We are/were staying until Monday. It was supposed to be the ideal covid safe vacation.
A family member is temporarily living there because he got a new job nearby. However, he is away this weekend for a wedding.
He just told us he’ll be home a day earlier than planned because he was called in to work Monday. He is unvaccinated (don’t even get me started) and will have just been at a wedding. We have two unvaccinated kids (under 12).
Do we need to drive six hours home less than 48 hours after arriving there?! Sigh. I am thinking of pitching a tent and we’ll stay in that overnight for the last night. This sucks.
We are en route to my parents’ lake house six hours from home. We are/were staying until Monday. It was supposed to be the ideal covid safe vacation.
A family member is temporarily living there because he got a new job nearby. However, he is away this weekend for a wedding.
He just told us he’ll be home a day earlier than planned because he was called in to work Monday. He is unvaccinated (don’t even get me started) and will have just been at a wedding. We have two unvaccinated kids (under 12).
Do we need to drive six hours home less than 48 hours after arriving there?! Sigh. I am thinking of pitching a tent and we’ll stay in that overnight for the last night. This sucks.
Can he stay somewhere else for the night? Offer to pay for a hotel room for him?
My oldest is in the high school marching band. Last night was the first football game. The band all wore masks as they marched into the stadiums and while they sat in the stands.
The stands were packed. First game of the season plus the visiting team was a major rival. So lots of people on both sides. Hardly anyone was wearing a mask. It was nerve racking. Thank goodness the band director told his kids to mask up even though it was technically not required. According to my kid, he strongly recommended masks. And they all happily complied. They’re a great group of kids.
Masks are required in the school building. I know we were outside but it was such a big crowd. I wasn’t in the stands(I worked concessions-mask required at all times there. Cooking burgers on the grill while masked SUCKS by the way but we did it.) but my MIL and younger kid were in the stands. They left after the halftime show because they didn’t feel comfortable even with masks on. Plus he’s too young still to get vaccinated.
And all those unmasked high school kids in the stands start school on Tuesday. Ugh.
Post by RoxMonster on Sept 4, 2021 12:10:29 GMT -5
PDQ The place where I teach is having the Homecoming dance out in the parking lot so the kids don’t have to wear masks. The thing is, when you’re on top of other people crowded in dancing, you should still be masking. But it isn’t a rule put out by our board of Ed so they can do it. I worry this will be a huge super spreader event. I don’t think the majority of our students are vaccinated.