Covid chain - do I need to be concerned?

[af1212]

Help me think this through -

My kid was at an outdoor bday party yesterday afternoon - she did go inside to make a plate, and that’s where they cut the cake. She wore a mask inside but not outside. Doesn’t seem like most other people wore masks.

There were two kids at the party - toddlers (my kid is 8 - I’m saying this so you can imagine they prob didn’t spend a ton of time together).

The kids at the party have a mom who was not at the party. Last night the mom tested positive for covid. Kids and their dad have no symptoms. Mom has mild symptoms. I think she tested for her work as routine. Mom and dad were vaccinated. I’m not sure if dad was at the party but I think he was.

What, if anything, do I need to do for my kid/family?

[pierogigirl]

Since mom wasn't there, no one (except her own immediate family) was a close contact. I'd just keep an eye on my kids and test if they show symptoms.

ETA: Hopefully you are in an area that does contact tracing, so you can be informed if your kids were a close contact.

[cjcouple]

I wouldn't be concerned. Just keep an eye on her, be extra vigilant about hand washing and mask wearing.

[sunshineluv]

I wouldn’t be concerned (well any more concerned than I normally am). Since the direct contact wasn’t at the party. If she develops any symptoms I would test, but that’s what we do all the time now.

[stemmie]

Unless your kid is the sort who is drawn to babies and toddlers, I wouldn't be overly concerned. They probably didn't have much interaction. I would keep on with the usual masking and handwashing routine and keep an eye out for symptoms.

[frlcb]

I wouldn't be concerned. I imagine this happens to everyone often - being around someone who has been around someone who has tested positive, and we never know. Just watch for symptoms but I wouldn't quarantine or test for this situation.

[W.T.Faulkner]

Keep an eye on the kids, but no quarantining or testing necessary.

[af1212]

I have a bit more information - boys of positive mom were in a garage hanging out for almost entirety of party. My kid was outside for most of party. Several adults at the party have confirmed that she did a great job of wearing mask both inside and outside except when she was eating (which was only outside).

She is super nervous so I gave her a rapid test this am and will do again in 3 days. I know they’re not worth much but hoping it at least calms her nerves. She was crying so hard she gave herself a headache which she then was worried was covid symptom.

[lilac05]

Aww…poor girl. It sounds like you have nothing more than usual to be concerned about.

This has all taken such a mental/emotional toll on our kids. We spend a lot of time telling kids they need to wear a mask and what can happen if they don’t. If parents talk about Covid around kids, they hear all kinds of scary things. But in reality, even with Delta, the odds are VERY much in their favor that they’ll be just fine. My 10y/o tested positive this week. Physically, he’s generally good. Just mild symptoms. But he’s had a lot to process mentally/emotionally. We spent 18 months working our asses off to stay healthy and avoid this Big Thing…and now it’s in our home. It’s a lot to process, and I wish more people talked about it.

[Velar Fricative]

I would not be concerned. Just keep doing what you’re doing re: monitoring symptoms.

[sonrisa]

Sept 12, 2021 8:36:51 GMT -5 af1212 said:

She is super nervous so I gave her a rapid test this am and will do again in 3 days. I know they’re not worth much but hoping it at least calms her nerves. She was crying so hard she gave herself a headache which she then was worried was covid symptom.

One thing you can do it give her information about contagion: She isn't going to be having symptoms or testing positive this morning for something she was exposed to yesterday afternoon. If you are worried, then testing 5-7 days out with PCR is the best way to get answers. 

While I'm one to advocate testing whenever warranted, I wouldn't test in this case. I'd wait to hear if the kids ever test positive and watch for symptoms as the week progresses.

[wildrice]

I wouldn't worry. We've probably all been exposed to this degree many times already during this pandemic. As always, keep an eye on her but I don't think she's in any serious risk.

[NewOrleans]

I’d just watch. But I want to scream into the void how goddamned tired I am of the mental energy of planning and thinking and rethinking everything around the pandemic/ risk.
😫

[jorja]

I’d probably test if it’s convenient, but I try to get my kids tested once a week or so when they’re in school anyway. I wouldn’t be super concerned. Sounds pretty low risk.

[jorja]

Sept 12, 2021 11:39:10 GMT -5 NewOrleans said:

I’d just watch. But I want to scream into the void how goddamned tired I am of the mental energy of planning and thinking and rethinking everything around the pandemic/ risk.
😫

God, yes.

[af1212]

Sept 12, 2021 23:40:45 GMT -5 jorja said:

I’d probably test if it’s convenient, but I try to get my kids tested once a week or so when they’re in school anyway. I wouldn’t be super concerned. Sounds pretty low risk.

Like a PCR at a place? How do you make this happen? And isn’t it $$?

[lilac05]

Sept 13, 2021 8:54:50 GMT -5 spearmintleaf said:

Sept 12, 2021 8:51:33 GMT -5 lilac05 said:

Aww…poor girl. It sounds like you have nothing more than usual to be concerned about.

This has all taken such a mental/emotional toll on our kids. We spend a lot of time telling kids they need to wear a mask and what can happen if they don’t. If parents talk about Covid around kids, they hear all kinds of scary things. But in reality, even with Delta, the odds are VERY much in their favor that they’ll be just fine. My 10y/o tested positive this week. Physically, he’s generally good. Just mild symptoms. But he’s had a lot to process mentally/emotionally. We spent 18 months working our asses off to stay healthy and avoid this Big Thing…and now it’s in our home. It’s a lot to process, and I wish more people talked about it.

A lot of people do talk about the emotional toll this is taking on kids, but it’s mostly Republicans and anti-maskers. And because they are so extreme, we don’t listen to anything they say. And I think the same goes in our direction.

That’s true. I do hear it from that side. Unfortunately, it’s almost always used as a reason for why we shouldn’t wear masks and why we should just carry on with our normal lives. I wish there was more about how to help kids who have been so Covid-cautious and are now positive themselves. Why does everything have to be so polarized?!? Ugh.

[af1212]

Sept 13, 2021 9:04:59 GMT -5 spearmintleaf said:

Sept 12, 2021 8:36:51 GMT -5 af1212 said:

I have a bit more information - boys of positive mom were in a garage hanging out for almost entirety of party. My kid was outside for most of party. Several adults at the party have confirmed that she did a great job of wearing mask both inside and outside except when she was eating (which was only outside).

She is super nervous so I gave her a rapid test this am and will do again in 3 days. I know they’re not worth much but hoping it at least calms her nerves. She was crying so hard she gave herself a headache which she then was worried was covid symptom.

I think you need to take a look at what you can do differently given this situation. How did several adults confirm that she was wearing the mask? Did you ask multiple people? Or did they know how nervous you are and they offered the info to reassure you?

The data on outdoor transmission is that it’s almost zero. Why have her mask outdoors?

Asymptomatic people don’t show up reliably on a rapid test, and certainly not a day after exposure. Why test, rather than educate her?

How did you find out where she was compared to the boys? Were you grilling her on who she talked to and where she was? Or call another parent within earshot of her?

Why did she cry so hard? Our kids need to be cautious and aware, but she sounds completely terrified.

What I’m getting at here is that your anxiety sounds like it’s a bit out of control. And you’re passing that along to your daughter, who is now suffering more than she needs to. For example I would not have told my kid about the other kid’s mother, because I wouldn’t have wanted to stress her out. I would have just watched and waited. I think you need to recognize the impact that all this is having on her and try to make some adjustments, for the sake of her mental well being. The world is very scary right now and our kids need us to be calm. They feed off of us.

This is a lot and feels very blamey.

Not sure what you mean by “what you can do differently”. I’m not really sure I can do anything differently. She wore a mask. She attended an outdoor party. Unless I keep my kids home 100% of the time not sure we can really be any safer than that.

Several adults confirmed she was wearing a mask because the mom of the party texted me to tell me she had worn a mask. In addition the aunt of the bday kid who I know from my job texted me to tell me she was wearing a mask. Then the spouse of the aunt also texted me to tell me she was wearing a mask. I did not ask any of them, nothing was said verbally, and nothing was done in earshot or view of my kid.

I’m not sure why you are questioning me for having her wear a mask outdoors? She is 8. She knows she must wear a mask when she is indoors and it is her choice when she is outside. These are the rules at school so we keep them the same in our family for consistency. Are you saying I should tell her she cannot wear a mask outdoors? That seems bizarre to me - if it doesn’t impede her and she is comfortable why would I change it.

I did not ask her anything at all about the party. Again the mom of the bday girl texted me to say - just wanted to let you know your kid was not near these other kids. She then said the thing about the video games.

I did not call anyone or discuss anything within earshot of her. The only person I spoke to verbally about this was my husband and I did that outdoors in our backyard while all of the kids were inside.

Fine that you would not have told your kid. I felt as though it was the responsible thing to do to tell mine. I didn’t do it in a scary way - you are making a heck of a lot of assumptions about me, my parenting, my kids.

This is the first time we have ever experienced this and I had no idea she would be upset. She was fine at first and went off to play. Then about 15 minutes later she started getting worked up about it. I think that is a completely normal reaction from an 8 yo and I did my best to quell her fears.

[sonrisa]

Sept 13, 2021 9:37:41 GMT -5 af1212 said:

Sept 13, 2021 9:04:59 GMT -5 spearmintleaf said:

I think you need to take a look at what you can do differently given this situation. How did several adults confirm that she was wearing the mask? Did you ask multiple people? Or did they know how nervous you are and they offered the info to reassure you?

The data on outdoor transmission is that it’s almost zero. Why have her mask outdoors?

Asymptomatic people don’t show up reliably on a rapid test, and certainly not a day after exposure. Why test, rather than educate her?

How did you find out where she was compared to the boys? Were you grilling her on who she talked to and where she was? Or call another parent within earshot of her?

Why did she cry so hard? Our kids need to be cautious and aware, but she sounds completely terrified.

What I’m getting at here is that your anxiety sounds like it’s a bit out of control. And you’re passing that along to your daughter, who is now suffering more than she needs to. For example I would not have told my kid about the other kid’s mother, because I wouldn’t have wanted to stress her out. I would have just watched and waited. I think you need to recognize the impact that all this is having on her and try to make some adjustments, for the sake of her mental well being. The world is very scary right now and our kids need us to be calm. They feed off of us.

This is a lot and feels very blamey.

Agreed.

[sonrisa]

Sept 13, 2021 8:54:50 GMT -5 spearmintleaf said:

Sept 12, 2021 8:51:33 GMT -5 lilac05 said:

Aww…poor girl. It sounds like you have nothing more than usual to be concerned about.

This has all taken such a mental/emotional toll on our kids. We spend a lot of time telling kids they need to wear a mask and what can happen if they don’t. If parents talk about Covid around kids, they hear all kinds of scary things. But in reality, even with Delta, the odds are VERY much in their favor that they’ll be just fine. My 10y/o tested positive this week. Physically, he’s generally good. Just mild symptoms. But he’s had a lot to process mentally/emotionally. We spent 18 months working our asses off to stay healthy and avoid this Big Thing…and now it’s in our home. It’s a lot to process, and I wish more people talked about it.

A lot of people do talk about the emotional toll this is taking on kids, but it’s mostly Republicans and anti-maskers. 

Interesting. Around here, most people talk about emotional and mental health factors *and* take proper precautions and mask.

At a baseline, I think the left is better at acknowledging and addressing emotional and mental health issues and doing so with less shaming or blaming.