Open letters 9/15

[186momx]

Go!

[186momx]

Dear Roofers
You guys did an amazing job. No mess left behind and the roof looks amazing. I just wish you would have called/texted/emailed that you were done and I could have asked a couple questions.
Happy with my new roof

Dear DD
I'm so excited you got the stupid double back hip circle on bars last night. Only skill missing is tumbling.
Super proud of you
Mom
Dear H (private lesson instructor)
Thank you for being my spy during practice. Thank you for understanding DD and working with her and knowing what she needs. We appreciate you more than words can say.
Me

[mae0111]

Dear Job -

I like you so far! Let's stay fun mmmkay?

New Employee

Dear Cousins -

Sigh...

I heard there was a post directed at people that couldn’t make it to the memorial (I didn’t see it because I was blocked by that person, but someone was kind enough to screenshot and send it along to me).

First of all, I would venture to guess that not one of you knows what’s happening in my life, my parents’ lives, or the lives of my siblings. Similarly, I have no idea what’s happening in most of your lives, so I wouldn’t begin to judge anyone for not attending. But really, you have no idea why we didn’t come.

But… since some of you seem to care so much, maybe you should question why the rest of my family has been missing from so many events (weddings, baby showers, christenings). Perhaps it was because… they weren’t invited! Or, maybe… check out the lovely obituary for Auntie and see if you can figure out if someone was missing… like my mom, who was not listed with the other inlaws...

Everyone does deal with grief in different ways. I chose not to shame people that have repeatedly left out my family, or made nasty comments to them, or made sniping comments about the past. I had no desire to cast a pall over the day. So, some of us just chose to take the high road and keep to ourselves. Other of you seem to have chosen a different path.

Cousin who is pretty much done with all of you

Dear WP -

Do I post what I wrote above in response to a sh!tty post on our cousins FB page? Or do I just shut up and fade away? I doubt it will solve anything, but it might make me stop seething...

Mae

[twinmomma]

Dear self,
No, you do not need to feel guilty about leaving the girls at the club in between after school care and swim team time. At most, you would pick them up, bring them home for half an hour, and then have to round up two kids and all their gear to get them back out the door for practice. They're allowed to stay straight through. Just make your life easier and leave them there.
Signed,
Mom guilt

PS - Use that 45 minutes to do your own exercise! Perfect time to squeeze in a ride without worrying about what the kids are up to!

Dear WPs,
I can't figure out if I'm supposed to sit and watch swim team practice every time. It's a very boring sport to have to sit and watch 3x a week, with a mask on, in a super humid indoor pool area. I love seeing my kids growth, but not sure I need to watch it happen in real time over and over, you know?
Signed,
New sports mom

[mae0111]

Dear twinmomma -

I stay at DD2’s soccer for 2 reasons. 1. I give her the mom eye when she’s goofing off, and 2. I use the time to walk. I can usually get in 3 miles and be back for the scrimmage.

Otherwise, if I’m staying at a practice, it’s because it’s too inconvenient to leave and come back. So I sit and read or move around.

You do not have to stay unless they ask you to stay. And frankly sitting masked at an indoor pool sounds miserable.

Mae

[186momx]

twinmomma, I'm the mom who races home for 30 minutes with DD and then races her to practice just so she can eat. Don't do this it makes the afternoon exhausting. I miss watching DD practice. We still aren't allowed to watch because of COVID but I wouldn't ever go watch her whole 3 hour practice. If you want to watch then watch or just come in and watch the last 15 minutes.
186momx

mae0111, I don't think replying to the post will change anything.

[supertrooper1]

mae0111, I wouldn't respond. Seems like there is enough drama and I don't see you responding doing anything but adding more drama. Sounds like they're special people who are going to complain no matter what.

Dear bus garage lady,
At what age is it appropriate for DS to get off the bus by himself? I thought 8 was old enough. The bus driver thinks he is old enough. He walks less than a half block to the house. I'm sorry I didn't give the bus driver a heads up that I wouldn't be waiting, but I thought DS could handle it now.
Signed,
Child of the 80's that doesn't know all of the protective parenting rules
P.S. Please don't tell ex-H that you called me to say DS isn't old enough to get off the bus by himself. He will spin it and it will end up costing me thousands more in court for something a judge would laugh at and rule in my favor. I know you know him since the school district is small.

[waverly]

Dear tree,

Please stop trying to kill dogwalkers walking by with randomly cracking and falling (20 foot long) branches. You've done this twice now. You are a 200 year old Oak Tree, what is going on? Do you have a disease? Because you look perfectly healthy, and then BOOM.

Signed,
About to be put in jail because of my tree

[186momx]

supertrooper1, um the only people who have to be at the bus stop to get kids off here are K parents. Everyone else gets off and goes their separate ways. Maybe they don't realize what grade he is in?

[twinmomma]

Sept 15, 2021 12:55:08 GMT -5 186momx said:

supertrooper1 , um the only people who have to be at the bus stop to get kids off here are K parents. Everyone else gets off and goes their separate ways. Maybe they don't realize what grade he is in?

Ya, I was going to say this. Our bus company requires a parent to be there for kindergarten or they won't let them off the bus. After that, you're on your own kid!

[twinmomma]

186momx, mae0111, Ok, thank you for making me feel better about this! I think I'll stick around to watch these first couple weeks and then figure it out from there. It's only a five minute drive from the house, so I could easily run home instead of sticking around. And 186momx, thanks for the perspective on going home in between. I was feeling super guilty about it, but beau reminded me that fewer transitions for DD2 are always better, so I'm not going to worry about it right now.

[rere]

mae0111 it definitely isn't a good idea, but I'd really want to respond. So don't listen to me.

Dear 2 employees,

I don't do the tobacco prevention job anymore. I got a new job, remember? That job is all yours, so you need to own it.
I shouldn't have to tell you what to do. We have 3 Grant's with budgets and timelines that lays it all out. I was thinking of promoting one of you, but not unless I see ownership. I'd like to take the promotion the other one got before I inherited him.

Signed, annoyed boss.

[traveltheworld]

Dear DS's teacher,

I'm just so surprised and happy that you "get" DS. Your face actually lit up when you talked about him. And yes, he is amazing! I can't believe you already arranged for him to have one on one pull out with the junior high division math teacher. Not only that - you already understand that he needs help socially and have all these ideas about how you could help him.

It's just sooooo refreshing to have a teacher who fibally seems to want to help DS with both his strengths and weaknesses.

Signed,
Grateful mom

[supertrooper1]

twinmomma , 186momx , all kids K-12 ride the same bus and the driver drops them off at their respective school (same campus, different buildings). They know he's between 3rd-5th because the driver drops him off at the elementary school. So I have no clue why she thought he was too young. But I'm glad I'm not alone here.  I think even in kindergarten, my mom waited once or twice and then I was on my own.

[supertrooper1]

Dear new school picture company,
You're awesome! School pictures online available for preview and purchase the same day as the pics were taken! So different from the old company where pictures were prepaid, taken, and then after months of waiting, you get them sent home bent up in the child's backpack. And if you wanted retakes, you had to send back the pics you already paid for and hope they would be better than the first.
Signed,
Happy customer who is probably spending more since she can't decide between the 3 pics uploaded on your website.

[mae0111]

Sept 15, 2021 15:56:10 GMT -5 traveltheworld said:

Dear DS's teacher,

I'm just so surprised and happy that you "get" DS. Your face actually lit up when you talked about him. And yes, he is amazing! I can't believe you already arranged for him to have one on one pull out with the junior high division math teacher. Not only that - you already understand that he needs help socially and have all these ideas about how you could help him.

It's just sooooo refreshing to have a teacher who fibally seems to want to help DS with both his strengths and weaknesses.

Signed,
Grateful mom

I love all of this

[sdlaura]

mae0111 that's so great that the new job is going well!

twinmomma I also have the problem of not knowing when to stick around sports practices. I enjoy watching my kids, but there are 3 more of them that are either running around wreaking havoc, or someone else is having to watch them wreak havoc at home, if I stay to watch one kid play.

I have now signed DS1 (age 7) up for soccer from 8-10 at the YMCA on Saturday mornings (a practice then a game), and then DS2 (4) for peewee soccer, also at the Y, from 10-11. Plus some Saturdays, DD will have her rec game at the Y fields, too. I'm sure I do need to stay and watch the 4-year-old, and I know I don't have to be there every week for 9-year-old DD, but I'm not totally sure about the 7-year-old. I'm hopeful it's acceptable to at least jog around the field with the younger two in a stroller during the practice part of his soccer.

I know I'm lucky to have DH to help if needed, and he could come too, but Saturday mornings are his relaxation morning, and if I interfere with that I will have to let kids' activities interfere with my relaxation morning on Sunday And that's the only time I ever get without kids or work. Luckily my parents come to town during part of the season, and they'll be excited to watch the kids, too.

[twinmomma]

sdlaura, I feel like for the 7 year old you can wander around and stay in the general vicinity. The rec field where beau's son plays has a playground and walking paths around the soccer fields and parents are there, they don't drop and drive away. But they're not always sitting right on the sidelines, especially if younger siblings are on the playground.

[twinmomma]

Dear ExH,
Again with the kids forgetting important school items on your watch? You haven't pulled off a successful day yet since school started. I'm sick of saving your ass. Couple that with increasing drama and mental health concerns for your fiancee, and we're back to the "you need to not have our kids as often" discussion again. I'm too tired to fight this battle. Just give them to me. You know you suck at this.
Signed,
ExW

[mommyatty]

Dear Adderall,

Please quit making DS vomit. Other than that, you’re doing an awesome job. Please let the upset stomach be a “transient side effect” like the doc said.

Sad and Happy Mommy

Dear Son,

We are going to have to learn to swallow pills because the intense gagging and freaking out over eating the bites of yogurt with medicine in it is too much to take. And I’m sorry the medicine makes you vomit. But you are doing so well in school and aren’t crying and hiding under your desk. The medicine is really important, bud.

Love,
Sad Mommy

[mae0111]

mommyatty - can you open the capsules and sprinkle the contents into the yogurt? My kids hated liquid medicine of any kind so much that they’ve been swallowing pills since like age 4, but I couldn’t swallow one until I was like 14 😬.

DD1’s neuropsych suggested opening the capsules and DD1 was like whyyyy would I do that?? 😂

[mommyatty]

mae0111, that’s what we are doing. I don’t even know that he can actually taste it mixed into the yogurt, but omg it’s brutal. Gagging, almost puking, panicking. It’s awful. He’s just going to have to learn to swallow a pill.

[sdlaura]

I realized that the Y also offers child watch - that used to be drop-in - with pre-set cohorts now. So I signed 4-year-old DS2 up for child watch from 8-9:15 am on Saturdays. So then I only need to entertain him for 45 minutes during DS1's soccer before his soccer. Unfortunately there's no playground next to the fields, so two hours would be pushing it to entertain everyone.

[madringal]

twinmomma, oh man, I am so the opposite! I wish I could stay and watch swim practice, I love everything about it! My 5 year old just got moved up and is in a group, with no joke, mostly middle schoolers, and it makes me so nervous not to be able to watch her (45 min/5 days a week). Also, I just love to watch my 13 year old - so her group is so freaking talented and their practices just blow me away. But she practices 3 hours a day, 5 days week. I would never stay for the whole thing. But I would like to watch the 45 min I am there for my 5 year old.

[erbear]

mommyatty, try a straw. That's what got my kid to be able to swallow a pill

[shakinros]

Sept 16, 2021 21:05:25 GMT -5 erbear said:

mommyatty, try a straw. That's what got my kid to be able to swallow a pill

Mine learned to swallow pills when the pharmacy accidentally gave us tablets instead of capsules. She was 8 though so it might just be age!