Return to sender/UPS

[Susie]

We bought our current house in May.  Before us, it was owned by the original owners from the 1990s to spring 2019, and then by our sellers from 2019-21.  We knew the original owners' names from seeing copies of the deed/etc., but had no contact with them (initially!).

Right away, packages started showing up addressed to original owner.  A few in June, a few in July, at least one in August.  We knew that the original owner was an optician, and I googled the sender of the packages.  It was optics related, and at the time we had no contact info for the original owner.  So instead I called the sender.  After being passed around on the phone to a bunch of people (there was no order no. on the shipping label), they determined it was a free sample of something so just pitch it.  

When it happened again, I called them again.  More passing around.  More multiple calls.  Eventually they asked me to open the package because they couldn't find the order in their system.  It felt weird, but if the sender was asking me to...?  It ended up being more free samples.  They told me to pitch it, so we did.  We asked (again) that they take this recipient/address out of their system, that it was 2+ years outdated.  We don't even know how to reach him.

This happened a few more times over the course of the summer.  In August, H threw out another package.  I never saw it, so I can't confirm, but apparently this time it was a different (also optics related) sender.  He just looked at the shipping label, saw it was yet another package addressed to original owner, and pitched it.  We went on vacation shortly thereafter.

We came back on a Tuesday night, and on Wed. AM, original owner stopped by our house, which totally creeped me out.  We'd been gone for 11 days, and he comes by within like 16 hours of us being back?  Had he been creeping and watching for us to come back?  Apparently they live locally, and the August package was an actual order for a client and he needed it.  I mean, I'm sorry, but... a) nothing we can do now, and b) you moved over 2 years ago?  We've been dealing with your packages for a couple months now and we're tired of it?

He was nice about it, and left a card.  Asked us to call him if we get any more packages.  This was the Wed. after Labor Day.

Yesterday 4 more showed up.  Gah.  H called the guy, and they agreed we'd return to sender.  But the problem now is that they didn't arrive via USPS, so I can't just put them out by the mailbox.  I don't think UPS does free pickups for this sort of thing.  So now we have to drive to a UPS place every time this continues to happen?  I guess this once, since H said we would, but generally no thank you.  

I am super tired of this.  Since the packages just get left on our porch, refusing them at time of delivery is difficult.  How do I get out of being this guy's mail depot?  Or do we just stop, go back to pitching the packages, and figure we've given him ample notice?  

[laterz]

I would pitch everything that comes from now on. You've been more than accommodating; time for him to start adulting.

[arielroux]

I dealt with a similar issue when we first moved into our house in August, but eventually the packages did stop. I just called my realtor and told her about it, then she got in contact with our sellers' realtor who somehow relayed the message to the original owners and they stopped by and picked up the packages.

Do you think it might work to leave a giant note on a brightly colored piece of paper attached to your door saying that if packages are not addressed to the following residents of your home (with your families names listed) then you are refusing delivery? I would be so annoyed if I were you and I would probably just start tossing the packages since you already told him IN PERSON to take care of it. You've done your due diligence and already have gone above and beyond. Dude needs to get his shit together. You're not his personal PO box.

[expectantsteelerfan]

I would take it to UPS and ask them to please forward or return to sender, and then also tell them what is happening and ask them the best way to stop getting UPS packages that aren't yours. Maybe they can update something in their system?

If they can't stop it from happening, I would maybe collect any packages that are addressed to them and store them and reach out once every 2 months or so to the previous resident and send a text and with a pic and say 'these are on our porch if you want to come pick up. If you don't pick up by x day/time, I'll toss them.' And I'd do that for probably a year and after that, I'd toss anything that comes to them. You shouldn't HAVE to do that, and I don't understand why you are getting so many packages when it's been over 2 years, but I would also feel bad throwing out valuable stuff.

I will never forget when I accidentally placed an order from JC Penny for over $100 worth of clothing after our local store closed, and I didn't check and the address it was being delivered to was one of our old ones (several states away) and I called and it had already shipped and there was nothing they could do about it. I ended up fb messaging one of my old neighbors who I hadn't talked to in YEARS and explained what happened, and she walked over and asked for the package, got it, and mailed it to me. I learned to delete all my old address from websites after that!

[jinkies]

Ugh. That is super annoying. Yeah I think I would stop trying to return. If you are feeling generous you can give the former owner a heads up that he needs to make sure his address is corrected because you will no longer be able to manage the logistics of returns and/or coordinating with him.

We've lived in our home 12 years and still sometimes get mail addressed to the previous owner. Sometimes even addressed to her husband, who passed several years before she moved. Thankfully no packages or anything that looks important, but we stopped trying to forward or return things within a year of moving in.

[candreco]

Yeah, I'd do it this one time because your H said you would, but also tell the guy that you're not able to do so in the future and any packages that arrive for him will be left on the porch for a few days before you toss them. ETA: and he needs to check tracking, because you're not notifying him.

WTF to moving out TWO YEARS ago and not fixing this. Does he not have an office address this stuff should go to?

[dancingirl21]

I would do this once. Then I would tell him he needs to get his address correct (WTF) and move on. Throw away. Not your problem.

ETA: we moved into our home 4.5 years ago and get holiday cards for the owners before us. The first 2 years I did “return to sender” and also wrote “no longer at this address”. We have still gotten cards the last couple of years and I toss them.

[cuadrado]

I'm a dietitian and I randomly get packages delivered from brands. They pull your address off of your website and set it up in their system, and then mail free samples and swag out. I don't know when I'm getting them and sometimes I don't even know the brand. I have received a massive case of 16 bottles of Kefir on dry ice, and the company didn't even know if I would be home to refrigerate it. It's kind of crazy. If you open up the box, there is usually a letter from the sales rep. You could contact them and ask them to stop sending stuff, especially if these packages are from the same company. If it wasn't for the letter, I would have no idea how to get in touch with the person who sent the things. The old owner probably doesn't either.

Having said that, I would def set the expectation with the original owner that you're not managing his deliveries and he would need to contact UPS / USPS if something gets delivered to the wrong address (in regards to his client order).

[pandorica]

This happened to us and was super annoying! Several years after moving in we got a package for them. After trying to get in touch via FB (we knew their name and that they stayed local) I flagged down a passing UPS truck and returned to sender that way. The previous owner replied via FB like a day later and was clearly a little annoyed that we had done that, but it hasn't happened since!

I would probably just do it the one time because your H said you would and then I'd start throwing it away. It's such a pain and shouldn't be your problem.

[icedcoffee]

I’d probably tell him you’ll text him when something arrives and anything left after 24 hours will be in the trash. Seems pretty easy to just shoot a text that says “there’s another”.

I wouldn’t do anything beyond that.

This is weird though. LOL

[Patsy Baloney]

Listen, I'm Midwest Nice, I'll bend over backwards for my neighbors and my community, but this is egregious. He's asking you to be his personal post office. No, dude. No. He needs to change his addresses in whatever systems he controls, be more responsible/careful when placing orders, and be done with it. The free samples seem to be out of anyone's control - maybe contact UPS about the best way to refuse delivery of such packages when you're not home.

If you're able to return to sender, I would do that, otherwise, into the trash.

[Deleted]

The original owner is lucky you're in the house and not me. No way I would have done anything close to what you've done to far. If I'm being totally honest, I would open the package, see if it's something I want and if not, I'd toss it.

[Susie]

cuadrado, that's crazy! And now I'm bummed bc my mom was an RD too and we never had that experience, lol!

In this case, we do know who sent it because it's on the shipping label return address. It's a smallish seeming company in the midwest. When I called over the summer I kept asking that they remove this contact from their list and explained that the house had sold 2 times since he'd lived here, and there was no forwarding address, but apparently no luck effecting that change yet. They're always nice when I call, but it's always a disorganized cluster.

We will return this round to sender because H said we would, but I think that's about it. We sold our old house in late June, and even now I would feel annoying if I reached out to our buyers about a package more than once. And it's only been 3 months, and they were our buyers -- not another real estate transaction and 2 years removed!

[Pilsy]

Plenty of people have weighed in, and you have your plan, so never mind what I would do.


I will say, I think I would have trouble tossing them without knowing what's inside. Maybe I'm too cheap and nosy. lol I wouldn't typically open someone else's mail, but somehow, opening the packages seems to be a lesser offense if you're throwing them in the trash. The curiosity would kill me! (I wouldn't have the same curiosity about an envelope, but a box?? C'mon.)

[TR]

So had your sellers been doing this for him for 2 years?

[brooklyn]

Now I’m curious if this is why your sellers moved…

[Susie]

Oct 8, 2021 11:08:30 GMT -5 TR said:

So had your sellers been doing this for him for 2 years?

Yes, I guess so.  

Apparently, our sellers called the original owners for questions/help with things with some frequency, so I'm guessing they didn't mind the package situation.  This was their first SFH, and they didn't seem very handy, a conclusion I draw from finding hardware still labeled in bags on the work bench, left there by the original owners.  There was no tools of any kind, ladders, etc. anywhere in the house when we went for showings/inspections/etc.  The house looks exactly the same in the 2019 and 2021 listing photos.  (Actually better in the 2019 photos.)  Our sellers literally didn't do anything with the house in their 2 years there.  

So I guess that does contribute to why this went on so long, but all in all it's pretty weird.  The weirdness actually went even a little further.

So in 2019, the house conveyed to our sellers partially furnished.  We knew that bc the 2019 RE photos that I found online (while doing due diligence on the address before making an offer) showed some of the same furniture and window treatments.  Unusual, but ok.  There was a work bench in the basement which also dated back to the original owners, and it conveyed to us.  (Fortunately our sellers took all the furniture and most of the window treatments.)

So we closed in late May, and moved in the last few days of June, just before we sold our old house on 6/30.  Like July 1 or 2, our REA got an email which she passed along to us, from the original owners' adult son.  He was now an REA in a city several hours and another state away (based on his email sig block), and saw that the house had sold.  He sent us this long winded email about how his parents built the house, and he did Eagle Scout projects at the workbench, and he wanted to know if the work bench was still there, and if so, could he buy it from us.  He said his parents moved to a town house (or something) locally after selling and weren't able to take it, but that it had sentimental value and they were moving in the near term to a SFH out of state in late summer.  They would then have room for it again.  We thought it was weird, I mean this thing has now been sold twice along with the house.  We said we thought something could be worked out, but could he give us some time?  Although we guessed he'd seen that closing happened a month previously, we'd only actually moved in that week, and things were very chaotic, so we wanted to get a little more settled.  His response was "I can pick it up anytime, let me know."  Like... you offered to buy it, how about we agree on a price as a next step?  We just ... didn't reply.

I think it's mostly harmless, but these people overall don't seem very firm on the concept that ... the house sold.  Twice now!  I understand it can be hard to let go, but it's time.

[gretchenindisguise]

Oct 8, 2021 10:26:50 GMT -5 Susie said:

cuadrado , that's crazy! And now I'm bummed bc my mom was an RD too and we never had that experience, lol!

In this case, we do know who sent it because it's on the shipping label return address. It's a smallish seeming company in the midwest. When I called over the summer I kept asking that they remove this contact from their list and explained that the house had sold 2 times since he'd lived here, and there was no forwarding address, but apparently no luck effecting that change yet. They're always nice when I call, but it's always a disorganized cluster.

We will return this round to sender because H said we would, but I think that's about it. We sold our old house in late June, and even now I would feel annoying if I reached out to our buyers about a package more than once. And it's only been 3 months, and they were our buyers -- not another real estate transaction and 2 years removed!

Now that you have the guy's card/contact information - do you have the original owners new address? I'd call one more time and have them change the address while I was on the phone with them.

Also - UPS does pick up service. I'd make them come back to pick it up - you do not need to be driving to UPS.

[Susie]

Oct 8, 2021 11:36:19 GMT -5 gretchenindisguise said:

Oct 8, 2021 10:26:50 GMT -5 Susie said:

cuadrado , that's crazy! And now I'm bummed bc my mom was an RD too and we never had that experience, lol!

In this case, we do know who sent it because it's on the shipping label return address. It's a smallish seeming company in the midwest. When I called over the summer I kept asking that they remove this contact from their list and explained that the house had sold 2 times since he'd lived here, and there was no forwarding address, but apparently no luck effecting that change yet. They're always nice when I call, but it's always a disorganized cluster.

We will return this round to sender because H said we would, but I think that's about it. We sold our old house in late June, and even now I would feel annoying if I reached out to our buyers about a package more than once. And it's only been 3 months, and they were our buyers -- not another real estate transaction and 2 years removed!

Now that you have the guy's card/contact information - do you have the original owners new address? I'd call one more time and have them change the address while I was on the phone with them.

Also - UPS does pick up service. I'd make them come back to pick it up - you do not need to be driving to UPS.

I actually don't -- we have phone and email, but no address.  I think it's about to change anyway, they were planning to move out of state around now.

[TR]

Susie, yeah this whole situation is so weird and these people clearly do not understand boundaries! You've gotten a lot of good advice, I would also probably send it this time because I said I would and then let them know, in no uncertain terms, that anything else that gets sent to YOUR house is getting tossed. Even collecting the packages and sending a weekly/monthly text is just too much in this completely fixable situation.

[felicity]

I mean I accidentally sent a few packages to our old address and the owners were nice about it and left them out for me to pick up. Previous owners of our house also had some mail and packages come during the first year here. We all had each other's phone numbers so it was a simple text exchange to leave the packages out for each other. But this? Two sellers ago with a couple of years gone by and this frequency is crazy, and this guy needs to fix the addresses with his distributers. I'd toss the packages. That plus the story of the son seems like these people are really entitled.

[Leeham Rimes]

This one last time I’d make contact with the Orignal Owner and tell them this is the last time I’m making any accommodations for them. That they better fix this on their end bc I’m not a post office box and I will no longer hold packages for anyone that doesn’t currently live at my house.

I had this problem three houses ago and I had to: file several complaints with the post master, file a complaint with the local police department (as advised by the PM since this is actually something common for fraudsters to do), and put notices at my door and mailbox “Do Not Deliver Mail/Parcels for John Smith, he does not live here” and then take photos of the notices in case the person wanted to make an issue out of any missing package.

I would caution against throwing things out bc technically that’s a felony, as far as I was advised. (Or at least don’t admit to throwing it out. “I just left it on the porch. Have no idea what happened to it”)

this is insane and makes me wonder if this guy is somehow using your address in a fraudulent manner.

[Roc A Bee]

I work at a college and faculty get free textbooks from publishers all the time. They do not order them or know they are coming. Once in awhile we get one addressed to someone who doesn’t/has never worked there.

They must get their info off some database somewhere. I’d assume free samples are the same and I’d toss every box that comes in not addressed to me.

[imojoebunny]

We occasionally get packages/mail for us at our old house, we moved 8 years ago. Usually, someone who is googling our address sends whatever it is, and they get an old address, instead of the current one. We are good friends with the next door neighbor, so the person who now lives in our old house, just gives the mail to her. We have, also, had some pretty substantial fraud that used that address.

In this case, I would return to sender with no communication to the dude. I see my UPS person pretty often, so I would just leave them on the porch when I knew he was coming with a note.

[gummy]

You're already way more accommodating than I would have been.

When we bought our old house the previous owners were annoying as hell. At closing they slid a piece of paper over with their new address and asked us to forward everything to them as they had yet to file a forwarding address with the USPS. Um, you could literally do that within minutes online. I threw every single piece of mail in the trash. However, when someone stopped by with the guy's wallet he had lost I did give that person their new address to drop it off.

[pooh8402]

We've been dealing with this for 4 years, except it was a neighbor whose packages we had been getting that we're related to their business. We initially walked them over to their house and said, please correct the address. Never did, so we started tossing them a couple years ago.

Neighbor moved out a few months ago and the house is still on the market. We've had one package for them so far but I hope it stops once they update their business address.

[macmars45]

Oct 8, 2021 10:06:21 GMT -5 expectantsteelerfan said:

I will never forget when I accidentally placed an order from JC Penny for over $100 worth of clothing after our local store closed, and I didn't check and the address it was being delivered to was one of our old ones (several states away) and I called and it had already shipped and there was nothing they could do about it. I ended up fb messaging one of my old neighbors who I hadn't talked to in YEARS and explained what happened, and she walked over and asked for the package, got it, and mailed it to me. I learned to delete all my old address from websites after that!

I did that a week after I moved last December. Thankfully not several states away, just a 5 minute drive. I felt terrible and contacted my old landlord immediately. The new renters were super nice and left my packages outside.

You've been more than nice Susie. When H and I were moving out of a rental that someone bought from our landlords they had packages delivered to the address weeks before they owned it and asked if I'd just put it in a closet to hold it for them. Uh, no. I was busy packing up all our stuff solo while my H was out of the country on business, getting paperwork to various people for my own TH purchase and working. That package went outside in the rain. No regrets.

[sadlebred]

I still get mail and bills for an owner of my house from the mid 2000s. Garbage bin only.

[Susie]

OMG.

H took the most recent 4 packages to Staples, our nearest UPS drop off location, yesterday.  (They won't do pickups for non-paying service like "return to sender.")  

TODAY THEY SHOWED BACK UP ON OUR STEP.  H ran down the UPS driver and explained the situation and said these aren't ours, we don't want them, we don't want anything with original owner's name on it, we don't care what you do with it, but we do not want to see these boxes again.  The driver said UPS can't print new labels (i.e. to direct back to sender) but he'd take them to his redirecting guy.  Yes, please do that.

We are officially done dealing with this guy's stuff.  

[Aloe Vera]

Where are all these packages coming from?! Is it still from the eyewear place?