Yesterday was my sister’s birthday. I talked to her a few weeks ago (we live in different cities) and asked for birthday gift hints. She said to take my family out and celebrate with her in spirit. I’m still mulling that over and trying to figure out if I’m going to send an actual gift or not.
So, do you exchange gifts with adult siblings, friends, etc beyond a big milestone? (She turns 40 in a few years and no way am I not giving her a gift for that!)
ETA: we speak more often than every few weeks, I just reread that!
Not in my family. Of course, there are 8 of us, so that might factor in, lol. I might buy the person a dinner or a drink if we were in the same city, but otherwise no.
Post by sofamonkey on Jun 26, 2022 12:51:16 GMT -5
Unless it’s a big milestone, or you see something so perfect it screams their name, we don’t gift as adults. Sometimes we go to dinner with my parents, but that’s hit or miss too.
We just do a call or text, typically with a heartfelt message of appreciation for the other one. I look forward to those texts more than I would any gift!
The adult siblings collectively decided not to do birthday gifts except for big milestones. DH and I still do gifts to/from our parents. We still do relatively small Christmas gifts between the adult siblings, but we have a relatively small family (DH and I each have a sister and BIL).
Post by followyourarrow on Jun 26, 2022 14:35:30 GMT -5
We do gifts. It’s just my sister and I. When she asked what I wanted, I said lunch with my favorite two little boys (nephews) and I meant that. We went out for lunch, but she also got me an acrylic clipboard that has glitter in it, fun pens, and some pictures of the boys for me desk.
Post by thebreakfastclub on Jun 26, 2022 14:51:56 GMT -5
We do zero gifts for any adult for birthdays or any holiday. I don't need stuff, and I don't want to exchange gift cards back and forth. I will treat you to dinner instead.
Thanks for all the replies. I think it makes sense, I just have to get over myself this first time around. We did agree to stop exchanging gifts at the holidays now that we both have young children, so this is a logical next step.
My brother and sister are a lot younger than me - both have just graduated from university in the last year. I throw $50 each into their accounts for their birthdays. I don't expect a gift on my birthday.
My H has 6 brothers and sisters and that side doesn't exchange gifts. There are just too many of them.
We agreed to stop exchanging birthday gifts a few years ago. But if I’m going to see them on their actual birthday, I usually bring a treat that I know they would enjoy.
So interesting so many have stopped -- I didn't realize that was what most are doing now! We still give gifts for both my and DH's immediate family. For my core group of friends, we typically go out to dinner for someone's birthday and some may bring the birthday girl a bottle of champagne or a small token gift.
I am not a gift person and strongly prefer to not exchange with adults. Having said that, I can't get my family on board.
We don't exchange with my in laws and it's lovely. We basically just trade gift cards in my family which is so dumb but seems to make my mom and brother feel better.
We literally have a home Depot gift card on our fridge that my brother gave my H for his bday. H stuck it on the fridge to save to give back to my brother on his bday. LOL.
Unless I see something that really reminds me of the person, I rarely exchange with adults.
My birthday was last week and I invited friends out for dinner/drinks/axe throwing. My best friend gave me a little something but nobody else did and I didn't expect them to.
My sister and I stopped with Christmas gifts a few years ago and instead plan on a double date to a nice restaurant as our "gift" to each other.
Post by litskispeciality on Jun 27, 2022 11:29:33 GMT -5
I only have one brother, and we typically just Venmo each other up to $50. I feel better sending it to him as he's single, in a HCOL city, and in college. We don't exchange adult gifts with DH's siblings, however they have a lot of kids, and now grandkids, to give gifts. OP, for our sister, could you give something practical like a spa gift card or to a place she likes to go to relax?
Coming up on a milestone birthday I think a fun gift would be an inexpensive (if possible) gift that I or the recipient never had as a child. Obviously make sure there's a use for it now rather than buy something else just to have something.
I exchange with my immediate family and my two BFFs. As in we make a point to get together, and during Covid separation, I mailed gifts.
For less close friends, if I’m going to see them on their birthday, then I’ll buy them a drink or bring a little gifty item like a bakery treat or a little potted plant. But if I’m not going to see them then I don’t give a gift.