I have many, but my top two would be to care more about school. (this one is tough because my ADHD was not being managed at all and I think it had a huge impact on my academic performance and confidence in myself regarding school).
My second would be to my in my 20s. Stop worrying and focusing so much on finding someone to love and be loved and instead, just go after the things you want in life for a job, location, etc.
I was so focused on being someone that could be loved and not enough on just liking myself and seeing that I am deserving of good things and happiness. I mean, I could say I did, but saying it and believing it are two different things.
Post by hannahgruen on Mar 3, 2023 18:52:48 GMT -5
Get out of relationships if they damage your self esteem. Not to listen to my parents . Have all the sex. Not care if everyone liked me. Oh, and learn Spanish.
Love yourself first and don't settle. Seek your own answers outside of your parents or religion.
This is a hard one because I simultaneously wish i had made different choices in college, but without them i wouldn't have progressed to where i am now. It's tough to not know the paths that could have formed from other choices.
I have many, but my top two would be to care more about school. (this one is tough because my ADHD was not being managed at all and I think it had a huge impact on my academic performance and confidence in myself regarding school).
My second would be to my in my 20s. Stop worrying and focusing so much on finding someone to love and be loved and instead, just go after the things you want in life for a job, location, etc.
I was so focused on being someone that could be loved and not enough on just liking myself and seeing that I am deserving of good things and happiness. I mean, I could say I did, but saying it and believing it are two different things.
I could have written this word-for-word.
Also, I’d tell myself to love my body more, and take better care of it.
Post by definitelyO on Mar 3, 2023 19:09:46 GMT -5
put yourself out there and don't be worried about what people think (which is always oh so every hard in HS). but I have WAY more confidence now then I ever did. yes- totally study abroad (falls into that confidence bucket)
you don't need to diet in your 20s just because your roommate has body issues and projects them on to you.
Post by mrsslocombe on Mar 3, 2023 19:10:07 GMT -5
Fuck around a lot more (or, ya know, at all...).
That no one would give a shit about my grades or school the second I left college (no one even cared in college), I feel like the girls in Book Smart now.
Post by underwaterrhymes on Mar 3, 2023 19:13:56 GMT -5
Hang in there through the tough times, continue to learn to love yourself, and do all those fun and impulsive things you feel like doing. If you do, you’ll eventually meet the best person you’ve ever known and have two beautiful kids together. I promise.
Take chances, be adventurous. In college and in your 20s, dye your hair, be bold with your style if you want to. Don’t make decisions based on a man (I’m using PPs) Travel as much as you can.
As a side note, one of the best things that happened to me was breaking up with my BF and living on my own and single from 25-27. Those are prime years of developing your “adult self”, especially if you are post-college. I learned so much about what I liked, what I wanted. though I wish I’d had more sex ;-) I find even 20+ years later things I learned about myself are still relevant.
Post by lilypad1126 on Mar 3, 2023 20:26:18 GMT -5
Breathe. It’s all going to work out and worrying/being anxious isn’t going to change things. Quit beating yourself up over perceived flaws/fails. In the same vein, being a mediocre student is ok. You’ll still achieve everything you wanted, and those C’s you got in college physics and calculus won’t actually hinder you.
Stop caring what your mother thinks about EVERYTHING. Get your nose pierced, get the tattoo, don’t lose sleep over the belly button ring, live with the boyfriend. She’ll get over it and 20 years later most of it will be a funny memory (never did get my nose pierced, but otherwise, it’s all just fun/funny memories).
Step outside your comfort zone. Take some chances, do things by yourself, don’t rely on others to help make you happy.
I think I’d tell myself that when life is the most challenging, that I’ll be able to make it through and to be open to new opportunities.
I think about my younger self a lot because she would never in a million years believe that I’m pursuing my current career change. I like to think she’d be proud.